AFABulous Boy Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 I know gay guys don't like vaginas, but what if the trans* guy is super cute? Like, he looks exactly like a guy? Has facial hair, deep voice, flat chest and everything except the penis? I'm not planning on dating until I am a few months on hormones and post-op for top surgery. Would a gay cis guy give dating a trans* guy a try if he looked 100% like a guy? I fear that I will never get a boyfriend. Though I identify as pansexual, I lean more towards being attracted to males. I feel very insecure about this. I want to get a boyfriend and get married in the future and have children, but I feel my trans* identity will be a turn off. Will it? Are there any gay cis guys here who have felt attracted to a trans* guy, or have dated one before? Link to post Share on other sites
Gldlynch Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 Hi Leonard I'm not a person who stands exactly in your shoes, but I think there are chances that a cis guy would definitely date you! It's just matter of finding the right one and openly communicating with them. Even though pansexuals are a minority, there are plenty of them in the world (: Link to post Share on other sites
Mezzo Forte Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 Pretty much across the board in the dating world, some people will not be interested in dating trans people, but there are still people who are quite open to that, cis men included. I've definitely heard of trans guys dating cis men, though it's also quite common for trans men to date each other. Can't say how easy or difficult it will be, but there are cis gay guys who do date trans men. Just be wary that some guys buy into the phallo-centric culture of the gay scene and may say shitty things. Know that such words are a reflection of them rather than anything that's wrong with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Chimeric Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 It's going to very strongly depend on the man in question, but it may be kind of a difficult road to pursue. The anatomy matters for a lot of people, unfortunately. I'm not saying that your prince charming isn't out there, I'm sure he is, but if you're looking strictly in gay communities, you may miss him. Link to post Share on other sites
LeChat Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 Trans Youtuber, Chase Ross, mentioned that he had the same fear: that cis, gay men wouldn't be interested in dating him, but he's mentioned quite a few times, that other cis, gay men were interested in dating him, even after he'd told them he was trans. So, it's definitely still possible to find other cis men who are interested in dating trans men, especially (from what he and his other trans friends have said,) in large, metropolitan cities that are more open to LGBT+ people. Link to post Share on other sites
InfiniteNull Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 I think it's about as likely as a cis-lesbian dating a transwoman or a cis straight person dating a trans person of opposite gender. A big part of it just depends on how much their sexuality is dependant on genitals. People who have stronger romantic preference and a weak sexual preference will more likely be open. Then again... all of this gets much easier if you just seek out an asexual relationship, or a relationship with someone who is pansexual as mentioned above. I'd say the other thing to be cautious of, even though it may not be as obvious for transmen. There might be cases where some guys would be interested in you because they fetishize your physical differences. If you're just looking for kinky sex and you're into it, then that could be OK... but when looking for deeper relationships, it's better if your partner respects you as a whole person. Link to post Share on other sites
Micha Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 I identify as a gay man. Last year, I had a friend who introduced me to some trans guys. We started hanging out and became friends. Some people would tease me and one of the trans guys, Sam, saying we look cute together and stuff. I didn't take it seriously, especially because Sam saw himself as being strictly into girls. But it got me thinking: could I be with a trans guy, despite there being no penis? What exactly attracts me to guys anyway? I decided that it's not the penis. It's the guy. It's how I feel about him and how he makes me feel. Being gay, I'm attracted to what I perceive 'makes a guy', like the characteristics you said, 'facial hair, deep voice, flat chest', etc. But the no penis part doesn't bother me. Now, keep in mind that this is just a theory as I've never met a trans guy who identify as gay here. I live in Indonesia, and even in the LGBTQ community, gender roles are still very much heteronormative. Anyway, my point is, if someone like me exists, then I'm sure there's someone out there for you who can look past the genitals and focus on the person instead Link to post Share on other sites
Janus the Fox Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 There'll be always be some that date another trans, being in the right place and the right time may yield results on the dating scene when ready. Link to post Share on other sites
ChillaKilla Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 I don’t actually think it’s that uncommon. Best of luck! Link to post Share on other sites
RK800 Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 Hiya, I'm a pre-everything transguy and gay. Yes, there are cis gay men who would date transguys in fact I happen to know a few. It's not at all uncommon. Link to post Share on other sites
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