How to meet other sexual/asexual couples?

[majace]

Hi all, 

I'm (female) asexual and my husband is sexual, we live in London, Ontario, Canada. We've been happily married for 9 years now and last year we realized that I am asexual. After many months of thinking hard and trying different kinds of compromises, it is still not working as well as we had hoped. We are thinking about going from monogamous to perhaps monogamish to see if that would work for us. We love each other madly and only want to continue to do this if it works well, as creating any hard feelings is not worth it for us anymore. I've read a lot about all the issues that arise from an open relationship: who wants to be the third person only for sex, sex for sexuals is connected to emotions so emotions may evolve, etc.

 

So I'm starting to think the best way would be to meet similar couples, but vice versa (man asexual and female sexual). I know asexuals are not that many and so couples who are sexual/asexual would be very rare, even more rare if I limit it to our location. But I think being able to connect with them would be an ideal option as we would all have a very good understanding of the situation.

 

Do you know how on earth it's possible to meet such couples? 

Those others who have started an open relationship or a monogamish one, where have you been able to find an appropriate understanding but no strings attached third person? 

 

We had never been to dating sites, but we started taking a look over the past few weeks but they all seem to tailor to different categories.

I'm posting this here in the sexuals category because I thought I'd find more sexual people here who have pursued this path and can share how they found people themselves.

[Chimeric]

Hello, @majace, welcome to AVEN! 

 

You're in the right place to find fellow sexual/asexual couples. Definitely take a look around this subforum, I think you guys will find a lot of good information and good advice from mixed couples across a pretty varied spectrum. 

 

It's not always easy being in a mixed relationship, but it sounds like the two of you have a lot going for you.

 

@Traveler40 has experience with the various (sometimes painful) intricacies of navigating an open relationship; her thread is here, if you're interested in reading her story.

 

I hope you're able to find what you need!

[majace]

Hi @Chimeric,

 

Thank you for your warm welcome and for pointing me towards that wonderful thread. It was very interesting and had some information related to my question in it as well. When I heard people say they found someone, it certainly sounded much easier than I thought, but I knew it can't be true and the thread echoes this as well. 

It certainly is full of endless intricacies. I'm hoping baby steps would help as this is all emotionally very hard for me.

 

Anyways, if anyone else stumbles here, I'd love to hear from them as well.