pizza_ Posted February 15, 2018 Share Posted February 15, 2018 I have never posted before but I don't know where else to turn to. I have been in a relationship for over 6 years. We are now engaged. I came out last year as grace and he has always been super supportive. He is awesome in many ways! Recently I have been questioning whether we should be in a relationship. I love him, but I am not sure if marriage and forever are in our future. I am crushingly depressed and anxious now a days. I just don't know what to do? I want to cry all the time. Link to post Share on other sites
Falcon7 Posted February 15, 2018 Share Posted February 15, 2018 Hey @pizza_ welcom to Aven I'm pretty much aro-ace so not ideal person to answer maybe... But many threas for mixed relationships tend to get too dramatic. Personally I don't really see the problem though. To summarise your point - You love your partner, and your partner understands you and you guys have been staying for a year so far since your coming out. And you are gray ace, not repulsed. It depends how much you two can compromise for the sake of each other. Depression cause a bad spiral of thoughts and seems like there is no exit, I know that, but your partner must be even more confused to see you so depressed. Look at you, I don't think the situation is that bad. Link to post Share on other sites
pizza_ Posted February 15, 2018 Author Share Posted February 15, 2018 Thank you @Falcon7 I appreciate your advice . I guess my fear comes from the fear that in the future he will want more and I will want something else. I have only ever been in hetero relationships and only one long term. What if there is more that I want to experience. What if there is more that he needs from our relationship? Can we sustain this? I start seeing a new psychiatrist soon, so I am hoping some clarity comes from that. I also just wanted to get some thoughts from the ace community as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Falcon7 Posted February 15, 2018 Share Posted February 15, 2018 @pizza_, I see, it is important to know the cause of fear. The future-oriented fear is difficult to deal with, but don't throw yourself in a mist of confusion and imagination. It is not happening right now and may not happen. Everything - including yourself - is constantly changing. I think it is crucial to keep dialogue and 'create' the relationship, rather than 'sustain'. Seeking advices from others is a good way. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
pizza_ Posted February 19, 2018 Author Share Posted February 19, 2018 I had a really good conversation with my fiance!! We came to an understanding that I think we can both move forward with!! This thread really helped give me the courage to talk to him. Thank you so much!! Link to post Share on other sites
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