Telecaster68 Posted March 18, 2018 Share Posted March 18, 2018 The awful experience of not getting a joke? Link to post Share on other sites
wavewall Posted March 18, 2018 Share Posted March 18, 2018 43 minutes ago, Telecaster68 said: The awful experience of not getting a joke? I wouldn't dream of speaking for chandrakirti and acknowledge that my exposure to you is quite limited, but a more likely possibility than her being upset over not getting a joke: You mentioned upthread that at least part of your motivation for engaging folks outside of the sexuals thread is because you want to educate folks when they have apparent misconceptions. That's all well and good, but if you aren't careful that desire can lead to your seeming to "educate" people about their own experiences and not about what it's like to be sexual. When you do that, that is indeed invalidating. Example: our exchange in another thread, where I made distinctions between (1) enjoying orgasms and enjoying sex and (2) wanting to make one's partner happy vs wanting to pleasure them sexually, and you suggested that distinction was "academic." Now I enjoy academic discussions, but writing something like that off as theoretical rather than engaging it meaningfully? Particularly when you don't know if the other person is speaking about their own lived experience? Yes, that can come across as invalidating. Because chandrakirti mentioned feeling invalidated, perhaps your tone struck her in a similar manner. I mention that because if that's not your intention and if other people are reading you the same way, that tone may be something to reconsider. I'm heading off this thread, so you shouldn't expect a response. Link to post Share on other sites
Solovei Posted March 18, 2018 Share Posted March 18, 2018 On 2/3/2018 at 4:32 PM, Laplace said: my likely aro aceness But what about your assness? Yeah, yeah, I'll show myself out Link to post Share on other sites
RedSheep2 Posted March 20, 2018 Share Posted March 20, 2018 what an odd thread to degenerate into a piss war. Link to post Share on other sites
if only I was a dragon Posted March 20, 2018 Share Posted March 20, 2018 1 hour ago, RedSheep2 said: what an odd thread to degenerate into a piss war. I was just thinking the same thing. Jumped into reading through this on page 5 and not entirely sure what happened... Would it be odd to mention that I find your profile pic/gif/whatever you call it rather disturbing? In an impressed sort of way, of course. I hate spiders but I can't stop looking at it. Link to post Share on other sites
Baam Posted March 20, 2018 Share Posted March 20, 2018 2 hours ago, RedSheep2 said: what an odd thread to degenerate into a piss war. I can't believe you missed the opportunity to make a poop joke, this being a thread about bums! Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted March 20, 2018 Share Posted March 20, 2018 1 hour ago, Baam said: I can't believe you missed the opportunity to make a poop joke, this being a thread about bums! Somebody crapped out there Link to post Share on other sites
Baam Posted March 20, 2018 Share Posted March 20, 2018 35 minutes ago, Skycaptain said: Somebody crapped out there I know, right? I'm really bummed out about it! Link to post Share on other sites
J. van Deijck Posted March 20, 2018 Share Posted March 20, 2018 On 03/02/2018 at 3:12 PM, rach123 said: Why do people like butts? I don't understand it either. after all, everyone has a butt. Link to post Share on other sites
LaSirena Posted March 21, 2018 Share Posted March 21, 2018 On 2/3/2018 at 10:55 AM, Telecaster68 said: They just look nice, and on the right person are enjoyable to fondle, squeeze, smack, bite, etc., and er during PIV to grip as part of the general thrusting and grinding. So, this is the post that prompted my question to Telecaster68. I’m new here but I read this and I thought ‘why is someone talking about thrusting and grinding on an asexual forum?’ For what purpose? (There is a forum for talking about sex, this is not it) This makes me uncomfortable and I am not sex repulsed, I can’t imagine how other people feel. And please don’t defend yourself by saying x number of people liked your post. That still doesn’t make it right. It’s also not a popularity contest. Link to post Share on other sites
LaSirena Posted March 21, 2018 Share Posted March 21, 2018 On 3/16/2018 at 1:53 AM, Telecaster68 said: My wife is effectively asexual. I mostly post in Friends and Allies but sometimes venture into other areas, quite often when there's particularly egregious misconceptions about sex being floated by asexuals. Particularly egregious misconceptions being floated by asexuals. Maybe you could provide some examples. All I’ve really seen is people on here talking about their experiences. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted March 21, 2018 Share Posted March 21, 2018 1 hour ago, LaSirena said: So, this is the post that prompted my question to Telecaster68. I’m new here but I read this and I thought ‘why is someone talking about thrusting and grinding on an asexual forum?’ For what purpose? (There is a forum for talking about sex, this is not it) This makes me uncomfortable and I am not sex repulsed, I can’t imagine how other people feel. And please don’t defend yourself by saying x number of people liked your post. That still doesn’t make it right. It’s also not a popularity contest. Well this is a thread asking "what's the big deal about butts" and Tele was just answering the question his comment wasn't overly graphic or anything like that, and sexual people's opinions here are just as valid as anyone else's (especially in a thread like this where it's talking about something that sexual people experience regularly) 45 minutes ago, LaSirena said: Particularly egregious misconceptions being floated by asexuals. Maybe you could provide some examples. All I’ve really seen is people on here talking about their experiences. When aces try to explain what it's like to be sexual and they explain why sexual people behave the way they do etc... Then actual sexual people are like "well, no, it's not really like that" but the ace is sure they're more right than the sexual person lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Deus Ex Infinity Posted March 21, 2018 Share Posted March 21, 2018 7 hours ago, [noize:injekktion] said: I don't understand it either. after all, everyone has a butt. I never got it either but then it's the same with any other body parts too. Link to post Share on other sites
RedSheep2 Posted March 21, 2018 Share Posted March 21, 2018 On 3/20/2018 at 12:13 AM, if only I was a dragon said: I was just thinking the same thing. Jumped into reading through this on page 5 and not entirely sure what happened... Would it be odd to mention that I find your profile pic/gif/whatever you call it rather disturbing? In an impressed sort of way, of course. I hate spiders but I can't stop looking at it. Yes, same here. I posted on page 3 or 4 and came back a few weeks later just confused. I would expect a piss (poop?) war in a political-, social- or religion-based thread BUTT not a thread about asses? WTF... And haha...thank you? (Re: my avie) Tarantulas are misunderstood creatures. They are actually quite docile & laid-back. Pardon if this post is less-than-coherent. I am intoxicated. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Jetsun Milarepa Posted March 21, 2018 Share Posted March 21, 2018 On 18/03/2018 at 10:33 PM, wavewall said: I wouldn't dream of speaking for chandrakirti and acknowledge that my exposure to you is quite limited, but a more likely possibility than her being upset over not getting a joke: You mentioned upthread that at least part of your motivation for engaging folks outside of the sexuals thread is because you want to educate folks when they have apparent misconceptions. That's all well and good, but if you aren't careful that desire can lead to your seeming to "educate" people about their own experiences and not about what it's like to be sexual. When you do that, that is indeed invalidating. Example: our exchange in another thread, where I made distinctions between (1) enjoying orgasms and enjoying sex and (2) wanting to make one's partner happy vs wanting to pleasure them sexually, and you suggested that distinction was "academic." Now I enjoy academic discussions, but writing something like that off as theoretical rather than engaging it meaningfully? Particularly when you don't know if the other person is speaking about their own lived experience? Yes, that can come across as invalidating. Because chandrakirti mentioned feeling invalidated, perhaps your tone struck her in a similar manner. I mention that because if that's not your intention and if other people are reading you the same way, that tone may be something to reconsider. I'm heading off this thread, so you shouldn't expect a response. Just to let everyone know that this person has left AVEN altogether because they felt so uncomfortable. Well done. On 18/03/2018 at 11:02 PM, Telecaster68 said: Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted March 25, 2018 Share Posted March 25, 2018 On 3/22/2018 at 8:36 AM, chandrakirti said: Just to let everyone know that this person has left AVEN altogether because they felt so uncomfortable. Well done. There are lots of things that make people uncomfortable anywhere online and in life, nowhere can be absolutely perfect all the time. I'm not sure who you were saying 'well done' at, but if someone is being made uncomfortable by the comments of certain members, they could just put those members on ignore. It's no one in particular's fault if they chose to leave AVEN instead of just using the ignore feature Link to post Share on other sites
Telecaster68 Posted March 25, 2018 Share Posted March 25, 2018 Just to let everyone know, that person is now back.... Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Jetsun Milarepa Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 Well, if thinking that makes you feel better.... Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 Butts also provide cartoon humour, usually when pranged by a sharp object, or before the PC brigade ruined comics, getting slipped or caned. Link to post Share on other sites
SorryNotSorry Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 On February 3, 2018 at 6:12 AM, rach123 said: Why do people like butts? Some of us like them because they fart. Link to post Share on other sites
RedSheep2 Posted April 2, 2018 Share Posted April 2, 2018 OP, do you feel the same way about boobs? Link to post Share on other sites
LittleLillie Posted April 3, 2018 Share Posted April 3, 2018 On 4/2/2018 at 4:57 PM, RedSheep2 said: OP, do you feel the same way about boobs? I don't know about them but I do, I'm not trying to shame on the usual body of a woman but I just find them repulsive. The ironic thing is that I often draw cutesy female characters though they often appear more petite not that I have a thing for that but I usually aim for the aspect of cuteness for my drawings. Also I miss the days when that word meant moron. Link to post Share on other sites
Lemonsky Posted April 4, 2018 Share Posted April 4, 2018 I've never quite understood the possible sexual attraction for butts and I personally wouldn't want anyone touching mine. Even if other kinds of physical contact would be appropriate with the right person, butt touching just puts me off for some reason. Link to post Share on other sites
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