Not Knowing When People/You Are Flirting

[Rupa]

@groovygrievy I believe there’s body language cues that we can study lolol, I’m sure there’s videos out there somewhere.

And verbally... I’m not sure how to explain it actually but some form of humour tends to factor in. Hmm this needs more thought than I realised... but I’ve defo done it successfully before 😂

 

Will agree it tends to be harder to identify when someone’s doing it to you, particularly if they are the type to chat normally and be generally quite friendly and not super obvious, but then two years later you suddenly realise noone else texts you at such a high frequency at any hour of the day that you happen to be awake lmao and if you ask they’re like ‘yeah of course, all along’

 

If we are talking the random guys that go up to women in the street and go ‘hey you’re cute can I have your number’ then I think I can safely say I see right through em lol

[Guest]

See, the thing is, I can't tell at all if people are flirting with me unless it's INCREDIBLY obvious. For example, my partner will flirt with me to try to get me flustered and if they are subtle about it, it goes straight over my head, but if they make it very obvious that they're flirting, then it gets to me. Plus whenever I flirt I dunno how to make it subtle so I just make it real obvious

[AwkwardAxolotl]

I'm terrible at recognizing flirting. Example: Some newspaper is doing an article about the place I work at. Photographer shows up, I'm supposed to show him where he can set up in the fish rooms. During introductions, he looks me up and down, holds onto the handshake a little too long, says "it's very nice to meet you," and winks. I do not realize that he is flirting.

[Goonie]

Didn't vote as it was geared toward asexuals. I know several sexuals who haven't got the foggiest idea when people are flirting. Me included

[Member131995]

This has happened to me a lot before. I'll usually find out after the fact. I'll be explaining how annoying this guy was and my girlfriend's will be like, oh honey he likes you. And then I'm like ??? why he gotta be annoying then? He was flirting with you. THAT'S FLIRTING???😥😥😥

[Guest Jetsun Milarepa]

I never got it when someone's flirting.

[E Wildflower]

I don't understand flirting at all, but I'm not sure it really has to do with being asexual. It's more just about not doing well with reading between the lines in communication. You kinda have to hit me over the head with things a lot of the time.

[AvatarRand]

I dont know how to flirt. I know to be nice to people and apparently sometimes that counts as flirting ??? Ummm.. help. And im definitely clueless when someone is hitting on me. 😅

[Adam Taurus]

I've always been a little confused by the mere idea of flirting. Like what actually is it? When I would see something on tv that was described as flirting it always just looked like a somewhat engaged conversation to me

[A Fellow Human]

I feel like nobody ever flirts in my whole school because I never see it but it might either be because I don't get it or because nobody flirts with or around me, idk. And I wasn#t ever told directly that I'm flirty either but I have a couple male friends and I feel like even my best friend ships me with one of them, but I don't remember ever saying anything romantic to them. I never said anything romantic to anyone, I even used to think crushes are just people you want to be really good friends with of the opposite gender (I didn't know what homosexual was at the moment). 

So basically, either everyone hates me and nobody ever flirts with me nor do I, or I'm completely unaware of it. Maybe people didn't ever tell me because I often don't get dirty jokes and they see me as this innocent child? I don't know. Maybe I relate, maybe romance is something that simply doesn't exist anywhere around me not even with other people.

[afiero85]

I officiated a wedding last year and after the ceremony I was talking to a woman about podcasts. My wife got very jealous and I later learned her friends view her as a slut. To this day I do not feel either of us were flirting with each other. I'm a friendly person who will talk to anybody. 

[Noko42]

I never thought I flirt unless flirting = being nice and answering questions lol. But I have been threatened a few time for flirting with peoples other half’s haha sexual people can be feel threatened by the weirdest things. 

 

My friends have also informed me I’m an idiot for not noticing when people flirt with me. Apparently when someone asks you a question they don’t care what the answer is they just want to have sex with you lol.

[SpookyNameHere]

I'm pretty oblivious when it comes to realizing that someone is flirting with me. I won't get it until someone else points it out to me. Even then I'll wonder if they're looking too far into it and in reality it was just someone trying to be friendly. 

 

I have been accused of flirting before by my friends, but I'm not sure what counts as flirting and what is just being friendly. There's a line between the two somewhere, I'm just not sure where it is. I'm just trying to be nice. 

[kanagawa]

I don't set standards when going out (bar, club, street or any place) with people so I don't have intentions to flirt or impress someone but somehow it gets to that and people tend to lean on you (not saying it is bad) but people sometimes get the wrong picture of how I see them

 

I like to compliment people because it is nice and positive and maybe it will make someone happy and also teasing and making jokes because it is fun

 

But when someone flirts with me I just go hmmmmmmmmm it's probably misunderstanding (even though we like each other for years apparantly we are flirting with each other and no one is making a move beacuse it's like naaaaaaaahhhhhhh it wasn't a flirt)

[DeltaBird]

Apparently all of 8th grade everyone thought me and this boy liked each other. We were best friends and apparently flirted with each other a lot (like, a lot)😶, but it both went over our heads because we both tuned out to be ace... 

[EmotionalAndroid]

I rarely know when people are flirting with me, though part of it for me might be because I am also on the autism spectrum.

 

In college my friend had to straight up tell me that he had been flirting with me for years because he finally saw that I just wasn't getting it. I was so shocked about it when he told me because I had absolutely no idea. Haha.

[Larissa R]

Unless they are very direct I have no clue. People often take my genuine kindness as flirting. Its like you cant smile at someone and ask how their day has been without them thinking you want them. Ridiculous. No hun, you are just another number to the human race as a whole that falls under the category of not attractive😂

[ArchangelAlbatross]

No and no.

 

[Guest DesertWells]

I never notice when someone is flirting, unless it is glaringly obvious. However, I have been told I am very flirty. This is a huge surprise to me, as I am just being honest and complimentary.

[Pramana]

Somehow I don't think that the concept of 'flirting' has ever crossed paths with my presence in any way, shape, or form.

[MollyDMA]

Apparently I'm not ace (according to my sister) because I 'flirt' with people

[curious fairy]

I have literally never flirted with anybody, and I sincerely doubt anyone has attempted to flirt with me.  If they have, I'll probably never know honestly.

[iff]

@Skyy

 

This poll is being locked and moved to the read only Census archive for it's respective year. As part of ongoing Census organisation, and in an attempt to keep the demographics of the polls current with the active user base at the time, the polls will last for one year from now on. However, members are allowed and even encouraged to restart new polls similar to the archived ones if they like them.

  

iff, Census Forum Moderator