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Benefits of Being Aromantic


Confuzzel

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I'm pretty new to being Aromantic and some days I really struggle with it and what I don't get to have because of it (I'm cupioromantic as far as I can tell). I try to remind myself of the things that are good or easier being Aromantic. I want to talk about some of those and hear what other Aromantics see as benefits.

 

Mine are: I don't have to dress or wear makeup to please anyone but myself, I don't have to worry about first dates, I won't have to pay for a wedding, I can eat whatever the hell I want because I don't have to feed anyone but myself, even if I'm poor I went have to by things for a husband or children.

 

That's all I got for now.

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You'll always have the remote control to yourself, the bed, the sofa and be able to listen to music you like as loud as you like. You'll never have to talk about whether to do something, go somewhere, or spend some money before you do it (unless you ask someone for advice). You'll never have to find an excuse for being out late, and you'll be able to sleep in the middle of the bed, without someones snoring waking you up, or someone trying to cuddle up or expect sex.

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A lot more free time, and the ability to do what you want when you want with no reservations.

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Watching all your friends crying for days after breakups with a thought 'nah, never gonna happen to me'. Especially when these are the friends that were repeating all the time that love is the key to happiness, and constantly blabbering about how unhappy you have to be.

Well, enjoy your happiness 

(I'm cold I know)

 

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Relationship can narrow your world. I can enjoy freedom and independence. Also I would say you can stay adventurous. If you have a partner or family, you become less likely to take risks because you have responsibility. 

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As an aro ace currently in a relationship with a "regular" heteroromantic heterosexual man, I have noticed several benefits in being aro (and several downsides). The most obvious being how my heart isn't "at risk" the same way his is. I'm less invested, all in all.

 

In a way I consider myself lucky in that I don't really feel the need to have a relationship. In fact, "crazy cat lady" sounds just fine to me. I also think that being aromantic allows one to see clearer. The whole falling in love thing seems to make people so weirdly blind. Fascinating, but I wouldn't like to experience it myself.

 

Being aromantic - to me - means never having to miss someone when they're away. It makes it easier to find happiness that doesn't rely on having a significant other. I know having a relationship isn't really an option for all aro people, but being aro doesn't automatically mean you can't have a relationship, because you can if you want to. It's just... more of conscious choice instead of your emotions picking your partner for you.

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On 2/1/2018 at 1:52 PM, Srslydunno said:

Watching all your friends crying for days after breakups with a thought 'nah, never gonna happen to me'. Especially when these are the friends that were repeating all the time that love is the key to happiness, and constantly blabbering about how unhappy you have to be.

Well, enjoy your happiness 

(I'm cold I know)

 

What, you've never gotten overly invested in a friendship? I can absolutely relate, not crying for days, but I've been in a position where I get more invested in our friendship, just to be crushed when they start dating someone and leave you on the back burner. 

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@babygyrl09 I've never really been too invested in friendships, I prefer having multiple loose bonds than a few deeper connections - I don't have anybody to call a real friend. Maybe I misused this word in my previous comment.

 

And yes, being left behind as soon as they fall in love is the worst. I've forced myself really hard a few times to be invested in someones break up problems, just to be forgotten next week. It's just not worth this effort.

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Galactic Turtle

Partnering up isn't on my list of desires or priorities. I know it seems like everyone else agonizes over things like that. I like friends. I currently have friends. I'm set. :P 

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Lonemathsytoothbrushthief

I guess for me it's being able to free myself of some of the guilt I've had in the past. I don't think I wasn't ever in a relationship where I didn't feel guilty because of it, but I simply wasn't made for that situation-I can barely handle my own life, let alone someone else's.

 

PS @Confuzzel I relate to the slightly mixed feelings! I think I should reedit the a/sexuality bit of my profile again, I was questioning again but it seems I'm solidly akoiromantic/confused. ^_^ Not completely aromantic but when you only rarely come close to feeling attraction and it doesn't last either, I may as well be.

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  • 3 months later...
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On 1/29/2018 at 3:32 AM, Confuzzel said:

Mine are: I don't have to dress or wear makeup to please anyone but myself, I don't have to worry about first dates, I won't have to pay for a wedding, I can eat whatever the hell I want because I don't have to feed anyone but myself, even if I'm poor I went have to by things for a husband or children.

 

On 2/7/2018 at 3:00 PM, Tempesta said:

You never have to compromise about anything if you don't want to. Ultimate freedom by choice.

 

 

On 1/29/2018 at 5:09 AM, Baam said:

A lot more free time, and the ability to do what you want when you want with no reservations.

 

On 2/6/2018 at 8:35 PM, Galactic Turtle said:

Partnering up isn't on my list of desires or priorities. I know it seems like everyone else agonizes over things like that. I like friends. I currently have friends. I'm set. :P 

Something along these lines.

 

Also, I didn't have to worry about prom or other school dances. It's really liberating, actually.

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Divide By Zero

The best part about being aro? Romantic relationships are confusing as heck and I have no idea why anyone would want one or how they even figure out what to do (for the record, I've never been on a date or had a romantic relationship so my understanding of dating and relationships is based on stories from other people, TV, and books).

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More time and freedom for you. No need to stress about your partner potentially cheating on you and all that drama. Spend time with friends all you'd like. The list can go on tbh....

I will say with the pressure to get with someone, especially as you get older, you'll feel like crap at times but you are who you are and just know to be happy with yourself 

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