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Gender?


em54

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I thought I might be agender probably or maybe bigender or demigirl but now I’m not so sure. My sex is female and I never gave thought to gender at first because I didn’t feel as though I was male so I thought nothing was different. Well now I feel like gender doesn’t really mean anything to me and I honestly don’t care if people think I’m a girl, guy, neither or both really. But I also sometimes think being a girl is a cool thing but then I don’t care about it. I just don’t understand what feeling like a girl or guy is like, I’ve never been like oh I’m definitely female or male. I’m really confused, help please.

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My sex is female and I identify as agender.

I think that you don't have to focus on the differences between male and female. You can dress or do whatever you want because things don't have any gender. You are just who you are, you choices and thought don't have to "stick" to one gender. You are you.

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Gender can be very confusing as finding a term that you identify with can be very hard, gender is based on experiences and how you relate to each term. The way you relate to gender may be different than how others relate to it, although you both have similar experiences they may also be different, especially when you begin to enter the grey area that is not binary. Please never feel the need to label yourself immediately and don't feel like you've lied if you find a new term to identify with, for example you may identify with agender right now but may later find a different term. 

Personally I identify as a demigirl and relate to gender the same way you described it if that helps in any way. I'm definitely not truly able to answer this, but I hope I at least helped a little bit. 

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butterflydreams
2 hours ago, Ella54 said:

I just don’t understand what feeling like a girl or guy is like, I’ve never been like oh I’m definitely female or male.

I don’t think most people know what it feels like to be male or female, because they just are. I couldn’t really articulate to you what it feels like to be female, I just am, though I am at odds with my body because of that fact. That’s the only thing I can really recognize. For most people, there’s really no dissonance, so they don’t have to worry about it. If you don’t really have any dissonance, that’s a very good sign (though not definitive) of being cisgendered. Sometimes people (I was one) have hangups about admitting what they are. For whatever complicated reasons. But if you’re just thinking about it too much, trying to figure out what your gender is, I think that’s counterproductive and isn’t going to yield too much that’s meaningful IMO.

 

If you’re relatively content with yourself as you are that’s great and I wouldn’t worry yourself too much. You can always play around with different expressions to see if that makes you feel any better, but even that doesn’t really indicate too much. If it makes you feel better though, go for it.

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