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Hi! I'm new here and I'm dealing with gender and sexuality


Breo

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Hi! I decided to give myself a nickname who sounds kinda neutral but masculine at the same time.

I'm a 20 year old woman and I've spent my whol life dealing with my sexuality. I feel more identified with the ace spcetrum, but I don't know what am I. Am I demisexual? Grey asexual? How did you know what were you?

And another thing is... My gender identity. I've always been a girl, even though I don't like what is expected from a girl -being myself maybe 30% what is expected from one- and when I was a child I thought I wasn't even a girl and I wanted to "be a man" when I grew up. Later I realized that I was just a girl who was tired of sexism and misoginy (that's why I'm a feminist). But I do like giving myself gender neutral names on the internet, even if they sound masculine -but I know that I'm not a boy because I feel bad when people think that-, and I want to ask some of my friends to speak to me with they/them pronouns to try it, but I'm too embarassed to ask. It feels weird. I know this may sound too confusing (and my English skills don't help either), but I would like to know how did you figured it out. 

 

Because hey, maybe I was a girl all along or maybe I identified as both, I'm nb and a girl. Is that possible?

Thank you! I love that there are asexual related forums out there, they let me know that I'm not mentally ill C: (I have enough with my depression and stuff)

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It can be hard to figure out what you are when it comes to being ace, at first I thought I was grey, then I slowly figured out I'm aro ace, and as for the gender part, that can be super confusing, it took me a while to figure out that I wasn't male and was actually maverique, it can be confusing and it really is just kind of doing research and soul searching and slowly learning and figuring out what feels right and what is right for you.

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NB and a girl at the same time... hmmm there's Demi-girl and grey gender female, maybe those are worth looking into.

As for the asexuality thing, if your not a fan of labels you can just go with ace-spec, or if you are then you can chop and change until you find one you think fits :) 

 

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Wow, I just search for that word, maverique, and just blew up my mind. I thought you only could be girl, boy, nb or a combination. I didn't knew there was more! This is really helping me Dean, I'll search for more info :D

I mean I don't think I identify as a maverique, but it's ann interesting identity. Thank you ^^

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6 minutes ago, Dean. said:

It can be hard to figure out what you are when it comes to being ace, at first I thought I was grey, then I slowly figured out I'm aro ace, and as for the gender part, that can be super confusing, it took me a while to figure out that I wasn't male and was actually maverique, it can be confusing and it really is just kind of doing research and soul searching and slowly learning and figuring out what feels right and what is right for you.

Wow, I just search for that word, maverique, and just blew up my mind. I thought you only could be girl, boy, nb or a combination. I didn't knew there was more! This is really helping me Dean, I'll search for more info :D

I mean I don't think I identify as a maverique, but it's ann interesting identity. Thank you ^^

 

(i'm posting this again because I didn't know hw to reply lol)

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6 minutes ago, Lichley said:

NB and a girl at the same time... hmmm there's Demi-girl and grey gender female, maybe those are worth looking into.

As for the asexuality thing, if your not a fan of labels you can just go with ace-spec, or if you are then you can chop and change until you find one you think fits :) 

 

yeh... These days I'm just going with ace  because it's more generic... And I'm going to save that video for later. Thank you :D

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if you do @(persons name) it will let you reply to people like for example @Dean.

also, you can find a lot about ace identity and gender identity from Ash Hardell (the person in the youtube videos above), they have some very good videos that helped me figure out a lot about myself

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welcome to AVEN!!

 

And speaking of gender, I understand how you feel I've been confused with my own gender for a long time, and always felt the disconnect with being a male.

Talking about sexuality, I never was confused about it, for long time I thought I was straight. But I never liked porn (nor even had a desire to look it up), girls never interested me (neither did others), and with a little research I did a few years ago, I've realized I'm asexual.

 

Even tho I'm new to this website myself, I can already assure you, even tho it's mainly made for asexuals in mind, it's a perfect place for people who are questioning their sexuality/gender too.

 

Once again, welcome to AVEN, hope you'll have a great time on the forums, and eventually, discover yourself. 

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Thank you, @Ortanique ^^ I was kinda desperate searching for agender forums, but then I saw that this forum support gender topics too, so I'm happy (and I've been reading this website for months, sooo...)

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