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Why are you repused by sex? TW this thread has sexually explicit content


OHno

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6 hours ago, fuzzipueo said:

. Swallowing another person's spit, not to mention other stuff? No way. Not happening. No thanks!😲 We'll not get into how being intimate with another person brings a whole new level of discomfort to the fore. Shudder.

Hahahaha....my thoughts precisely. 

I hate people as it is....forget being naked with them. Thank you social anxiety.

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9 hours ago, FictoVore. said:

regarding saliva, a lot of sexual people and even aces who like to french kiss

Yea...i forgot about kissing...sorry...

And i wonder why i'm still single

*shakes head*

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On 1/8/2018 at 3:08 PM, lazypanda said:

Hahahaha....my thoughts precisely. 

I hate people as it is....forget being naked with them. Thank you social anxiety.

Couldn’t even begin to describe how much this sums up my thoughts on sex.😂😂 As well as the fact that since the desire isn’t there the act is so completely foreign to me I just have no need for it.

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TW: Extensive sex referencing and nobody in their right mind reference. No offense was intended, and I apologize if I offended anyone

 

Spoiler

 

Oooooh kay. So, from a very early age, we are taught that our genitals are the most intimate, private thing ever. Seriously, the main euphemism is literally 'private parts'. Oh and now you're telling us that we just literally give up our most personal thing to a near-complete stranger for no adequately explainable reason except for some "pleasure" that I am sure I wouldn't feel. And don't even get me started on exchange of bodily fluids...

Saliva, AKA kissing, is bad enough, I will not drink from the same water bottle even my own parents have drank from unless it was thoroughly washed after they drank it but before I drink from it, et cetera. I find that kind of thing gross. Kissing: Worse- it combines saliva and microbiomes in real-time realization of the second law of Thermodynamics. As things even this intimate are just bleackgherrgheww (A combination of all the grossed-out sounds in existence) imagine what happens when one tries to combine the most intimate parts- as defined by my entire life- of the human body in such an already disgusting and possibly dangerous connection... Yeah, not gonna happen. Like, ever. E-V-E-R. Sex defies the laws of society in my eyes, as well as me gaining nothing from it. There is no desire, no passion, no familiarity for this horrifyingly graphic and disgusting action, and I am glad for that- Who in their right mind wants to purposefully do the biological equivalent of giving away your biggest secret to a bunch of people who will most likely hate you for it??? Certainly not me. Sex or erotic scenes in a movie turn the movie from whatever it was before into a psychological horror, extensive scarring included. Honestly, if everyone was like me in this aspect, a single sex scene would turn a best-grosser to a flop. Bleargh. I could go on for hours, but I won't because I want my opinion to be heard and walls of text suck sometimes.


 

-Ashlynn

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Lonemathsytoothbrushthief
On 08/01/2018 at 9:05 PM, lazypanda said:

Ever tried masturbating using only your thoughts ? Apparently most women can orgasm using purely mental stimulation. I saw a study about it somewhere.

Women dont need men.😛😛

Sometimes i wonder why there is even a need for partnered sex,except to make babies. 

Okay. This simultaneously grosses me out, and reminds me how much I hate my brain :mad: it's 100% true, and horrible. And ten times worse when you have intrusive thoughts and your brain randomly thinks of things which you specifically DO NOT want to think of.

I'm still not sure why I'm sex repulsed and don't want to put it down to one factor or anything, but think an experience I had as a kid still has an effect on me...

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Part of it is because my attraction to people is purely aesthetic, not sexual. Nothing is pushing me to act sexual towards another person so such a thing will never cross my mind when I'm with someone I do find attractive. As an individual, I'm closed off in my affection towards people. I can take hugs but having to give my body to someone for their pleasure is very unappealing. Being naked together, sharing closeness, sharing body fluids... everything about it gives me a gag reflex. Especially the fluid exchange. I have always been actively disgusted in other people's fluids. I can barely even handle other people plates after dinner because I can't help imagining people's saliva from their spoons getting on it. I also don't like knowing when someone is aroused by me. Being in a position where I'm causing someone intense arousal is extremely off putting. Most people love that part of sex. I can't stand it.

 

Now I can understand why that level of intimacy is appealing to most people. I just can't be a part of that.

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4 minutes ago, Kai99 said:

Now I can understand why that level of intimacy is appealing to most people. I just can't be a part of that.

Does it bother you at all? That you can't be a part of that?

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8 minutes ago, OHno said:

Does it bother you at all? That you can't be a part of that?

 

I can say this with a confident, capitalize NO. Nothing about sex makes me want to be a part of it.

 

When people describe how great it is, this is my reaction:

 

6S9659p.gif

 

I believe you... its just not for me.

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2 minutes ago, Kai99 said:

 

I can say this with a confident, capitalize NO. Nothing about sex makes me want to be a part of it.

 

When people describe how great it is, this is my reaction:

 

6S9659p.gif

 

I believe you... its just not for me.

No no, I wasn't trying to persuade you. I'm sex repulsed too. But I always find myself thinking I'd rather be sexual if I had the choice. Because then it'd be easier to find someone I could have a more comfortable relationship with.

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4 minutes ago, OHno said:

No no, I wasn't trying to persuade you. I'm sex repulsed too. But I always find myself thinking I'd rather be sexual if I had the choice. Because then it'd be easier to find someone I could have a more comfortable relationship with.

 

I didnt take it as you trying to persuade me. It is better to be sexual relationship wise, I admit, but I'm pretty happy being single so its not that great of a loss.

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5 minutes ago, Kai99 said:

 

I didnt take it as you trying to persuade me. It is better to be sexual relationship wise, I admit, but I'm pretty happy being single so its not that great of a loss.

Oh ok, sorry about that. That's fortunate. 

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TW: unpleasant sex.

Spoiler

For me, I don't think I was always repulsed, though I did always think of sex as something that happened to other people. But I didn't realise that the sexual attraction was something I didn't experience - I believed the myth that sex might 'awaken' that side of me. I guess I didn't realise there was a difference between having romantic feelings and feeling sexual attraction.

 

In time, I went from being quite neutral about the whole thing to feeling repulsed by the idea of having sex. It's not something I'm willing to deal with personally. I'm not too bothered by people talking about it or sex in films etc. though.

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They say curiosity kills the cat but clearly it applies to humans also. Tele hides his comment, I still click on it even though I knew it would gross me out and I couldn't even read through it.  Then ficto writes in big bold letters tmi and I still read it, and it was all I could do to throw up my dinner when I saw the word urine.

 

I am not sure if I am fully sex repulsed but I just know for most of my sexual encounters I wished I was anywhere else. I have cried a few times after the ordeal, although at the time I didn't know the reason why, I just thought that there was something wrong with me. With that said, I am not sure I would be completely happy with never having sex again. Since sex isn't even the most perplexing part of intimacy for me as I find open mouth kissing utterly repulsive.

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has anyone else had dreams about sex? I'm sex repulsed and I've had vivid dreams where someone tries to get me to have sex with them and I wake up feeling very uneasy and almost nauseated afterwards.

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4 hours ago, Dryad said:

has anyone else had dreams about sex? I'm sex repulsed and I've had vivid dreams where someone tries to get me to have sex with them and I wake up feeling very uneasy and almost nauseated afterwards.

YES. I've had sex before though, and felt the same way IRL.

 

I personally find sex to be completely disgusting and uncomfortable. As another poster said, my private parts are my own and I have no desire to share with anyone else.

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Janus the Fox

I was until my relationship allowed me to challenge my own limits with gay sex with curiosities, I can say most stuff I'll never do again, really repulsive to me.  That's just preference and having such fulfilled curiosities, means I know what I can compromise on in future.  At the moment, there's no curiosities with a heterosexual relationship currently, there isn't anything to go by to challenge sex with the opposite sex.

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I'm not repulsed by sex physically like I can watch porn, read sex scenes etc but what repulses me is people telling me intimate details of their sex life that is uncalled for or using it to put themselves on a pedestal.

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Siimo van der fietspad

I'm in a somewhat confused position of not being able to decide whether I'm actually repulsed by sex or just stone cold unmoved by it. I can think about most things without it disgusting me, but I don't think I want to actually try any of it, even with my wonderful partner who is the one person in the world I'd actually agree to it with (she is in no hurry either, so we're happy). I don't know if this is because I'm afraid it's going to hurt or feel uncomfortable but even though I very occasionally imagine that if might feel nice to be doing, ya'know, with C, I don't think it would ever be like that in real life. Cuddling and kissing are all the intimacy I need and they don't feel like a disgusting act towards the person I love most.

 

I used to be much worse and was usually horrified by the sight or thought of other's genitalia.  Pretty much all varieties of contraceptives I find repulsive - yes I know STIs and unplanned pregnancies, but rubber and plastic do not belong in the human body's most intimate area especially when they have all sorts of chemical liquids on them...euww. And above all it's so lame and seedy. The same 'teasing' poses (yawn), 'revealing' bits of skin (memo: people often look much better when sharply - or even casually - dressed than when it's all hanging out), the faintly nonsensical worship of certain parts of the body that aren't even sexual organs (wtf is up with thighs?). My honest opinion that's been pretty much constant is that sex is boring above all else. Most days I have never even thought about it. There are so, so many other things I would rather do.

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Tyger Songbird

You should honestly check my other responses to this. I've talked about my sex repulsion before, and why I particularly am. However, I will speak on it here and now again.

 

I could say that the genitals involved make me squirm really. it would be true, especially women's areas. They just look gross to me. I could again say that I just don't want to have any kids or raise children ever. That would again be true. Kids are not my thing, and i personally don't have any desire to raise children. I never have, and I don't think that will ever change either. I'm just not a kid person. 

 

I could say that certain sexual acts gross me out, and it wouldn't be a lie. I hate to think that people do stuff I've seen before when it comes to pornography. I mean, how is spraying semen onto someone's face or in their eye something special and intimate? Or pounding them like a hammer and nail, treating them like some dog or subhuman? That is downright disrespectful, if you ask me. Also objectifying. How people go for such insulting and revolting behavior is beyond me.

 

Some of the language is bad around it. "Hit that" and "smash that" were 2 songs I were songs I remember hearing younger.

 

 

 

However, I think personally i am repulsed by sex because it just isn't "me". It doesn't fit who I am at all. It's really weird in an icky, gross manner. Really vile, honestly. I think I'm repulsed by sex because it just is. It's sex, and it isn't something I'd ever want to do personally.

 

It's akin to infiltrating a foreign enemy territory to me. No siree.

 

It feels wholly uncomfortable to me, with all the organs and stuff working. Just getting an erection and all that makes me uncomfortable. They don't feel right. I wish I never even would get them, but I heard it said that even male rape victims get erections (which must still be confusing. Unwanted for sure). How I wish I had no arousal to begin with. I just wish the arousal wouldn't function or dwindle down. Sex makes me feel so uncomfortable.

 

Thus, if I ever did, it would basically be out of character and out of consent. I wouldn't want to ever. I am personally one of those people who just likes to not have that dimension part of my life. i have a lot of joy in my life as is. I don't want to include that ever. It would make me miserable, personally. And people pressuring you into doing said act is not love to me at all. I just couldn't even think of doing that. 

 

The amount of pressure this world puts on you to be "sexified" is just enough to make my skin crawl. I just wish that I was never expected to do something like that, or that people wouldn't look at me as a sexual outlet or something. I just wish that people would see me and not think of "when am I going to get married" & "He's weird because he hasn't ever had sex before". Ugh.

 

Sometimes I would wish that sex wouldn't even exist so that people wouldn't make it such a big deal to everybody. However, I don't want to be anyone's policeman, and that would only hurt everyone else. I'd rather just ask for acceptance really. That's all I want deep down anyway. 

 

I'm not sure if that will ever happen, though.

 

Call it pessimistic, but I just don't know if our culture will ever get their heads wrapped around asexuality fully to accept and accommodate us. It seems sex (and romance as someone who's more aromantic) is always going to be on a pedestal, and everyone is forced to adulate. I don't think the culture knows what to do with us, honestly, other than treat us weird. I feel destined to be weirdo most days.

 

I just wish people wouldn't treat sex as some major deal, and that they value asexuals who don't view sex as anything. I just wish they'd respect my wishes to have sex a nonexistent thing in my life. However, it seems that most people simply don't. And that makes me upset and indignant really. Yeah.

 

Why can't music be that "special something" that is the best thing ever? I mean, music is special to me. Why can't music be that "special love" for me? I don't get it.

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everywhere and nowhere
9 hours ago, tygersongbird said:

Why can't music be that "special something" that is the best thing ever? I mean, music is special to me. Why can't music be that "special love" for me? I don't get it.

Something I intensely dislike about our culture is how partneship love is perceived as the only true and only fulfilling kind of love. Even familial love is perceived as inferior to some extent (if it wasn't, why are women expected to sacrifice parts of their identities by adopting their husbands' names?), love for phenomena (such as music) is perceived as "exaggeration" and not even love...

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Tyger Songbird
9 hours ago, Nowhere Girl said:

Something I intensely dislike about our culture is how partneship love is perceived as the only true and only fulfilling kind of love. Even familial love is perceived as inferior to some extent (if it wasn't, why are women expected to sacrifice parts of their identities by adopting their husbands' names?), love for phenomena (such as music) is perceived as "exaggeration" and not even love...

Agreement. Way too much is put on whether you have a love life or whether you are with someone. Well, I like being single, and I don't think I need pity for that. Way too much stock onto that.

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  • 11 months later...

I'm not sure if I'm still sex repulsed. When I was younger and I thought sex was something I would have to find a way of liking if I ever wanted a relationship, I would purposely force myself to look at explicit things...they always grossed me out, I even didn't take a figure drawing class cause nudity bothered me so much...over the years I guess it's worked cause it doesn't bother me anymore...I'm kinda indifferent about it now...but recently when I realized I didn't have to force myself to like it..the repulsion has kinda come back? I get nervous kinda like a small panic and I start feeling very nauseated and uncomfortable.

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Old thread, but someone revived it, so.

 

On 1/8/2018 at 5:18 AM, lazypanda said:

I think even sexuals find sex repulsive in the absence of sexual attraction. Come on,the whole mechanics of it and the disgusting bodily fluids that have potenial to be carrying nasty germs,its just right down disgusting.But in sexuals,when they have this sexual attraction,it overrides the disgust and they engage in it anyways. But since the attraction is perpetually missing in asexuals,we will forever by disgusted by sex. 

Just my two cents...

I've definitely known sexual people for whom that's the case, yup. We're diverse, not everyone feels the same way. I'm not having sex with dudes these days, but in the past I've had the "spit or swallow" discussion with other people and always wondered why some women were so bothered by it, what the fuss was. It was never an issue for me. I can't say I find men's bodily fluids a turn-on but they're not a turn-off either. Just neutral. But that makes sense, what with the whole... gay... thing. Since I actually desire sex with women, I find that part of the appeal. It's all part of the experience, the intimacy.

 

I'm pretty "vanilla" though haha, so I can understand feeling grossed out by bodily fluids. I'm not into urine or shit or... god, whatever some other people are into... I'm sure there are vomit fetishes and whatnot. I don't connect any of that to sex, so it doesn't do anything for me. But the bodily fluids that are part of arousal and orgasm and all that, no, my brain doesn't have to override anything there. 

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secrethamster

I am sensitive to touch in general because it makes me feel vulnerable. Allowing another person to be close to me, especially to the point of physical contact, is just scary. I have to really trust the person and even then it stresses me out. Sex is like the most extreme touching that exists, and therefor the most terrifying.

 

I also see genitals as unclean and all bodily fluids are disgusting. 

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