Chimeric Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 7 minutes ago, InquisitivePhilosopher said: Women here are talking about uncomfortable experiences they've had with sexual males who they didn't know, approach them; that's not gender stereotyping because, as scientists and others here have said, most heterosexual males biologically have a higher sex drive than women, are more physically attracted to their appearance, etc Yes, but the stereotyping comes into play when people claim that all sexual men are only interested in a sexual relationship, which is patently untrue. Link to post Share on other sites
Éadweard Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 You all can’t seriously tell me you have no clue why a man interested in having a sexual partner would suddenly treat someone differently once they find out they weren’t compatible? If you are confused about this concept you are going to have a lot of disappointment in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Éadweard Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 56 minutes ago, Chimeric said: Yes, but the stereotyping comes into play when people claim that all sexual men are only interested in a sexual relationship, which is patently untrue. All might not be but most are. And the other thing is why should they be ashamed of wanting a sexual relationship? Why does everyone all of a sudden think straight people should be ashamed of their sexual orientation and their personal physical needs? Link to post Share on other sites
Chimeric Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 8 minutes ago, Just like Jughead said: All might not be but most are. And the other thing is why should they be ashamed of wanting a sexual relationship? Why does everyone all of a sudden think straight people should be ashamed of their sexual orientation and their personal physical needs? I'll reiterate, this hasn't been my experience. Of the many, many male friends I've had in my life, I have only had to actively cut one loose for refusing to cave to the idea that I wasn't going to sleep with him. There is no shame in wanting a sexual relationship. I don't think straight people should be ashamed of their sexual orientation or their physical needs. I just think that the assertion that they only want a sexual relationship and are incapable of having a platonic friendship with a woman is inaccurate. Addendum: And to behave as though this is true in all situations (eg, stereotyping) is damaging. Link to post Share on other sites
Éadweard Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 1 hour ago, Chimeric said: I'll reiterate, this hasn't been my experience. Of the many, many male friends I've had in my life, I have only had to actively cut one loose for refusing to cave to the idea that I wasn't going to sleep with him. There is no shame in wanting a sexual relationship. I don't think straight people should be ashamed of their sexual orientation or their physical needs. I just think that the assertion that they only want a sexual relationship and are incapable of having a platonic friendship with a woman is inaccurate. Addendum: And to behave as though this is true in all situations (eg, stereotyping) is damaging. My point is people in this post are complaining that once a guy finds out they aren't having a sexual relationship they start treating the woman "differently" by not dressing up to be around her, by not wanting to be romantic and take her on dates, etc. Yes a guy can have a platonic friendship with a woman, but that's exactly what people on here are complaining about. The people on here don't want the guys to start treating them platonically. There is an assumption in our community that when we come out to someone the other person is REQUIRED to change their feelings and if they don't they are APHOBIC because they don't want to have a sexless, romantic relationship with someone. If this community EVER wants to be accepted, it has to stop trying to dictate how other people should feel about sex and stop COMPLAINING about every single article or character anyone else ever writes about asexuality. Link to post Share on other sites
Nidwin Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 Princess/damsel vs I'm the Man syndrome. As Sally wrote, that's what you can and have to expect from sexual men, nothing more nothing less. Link to post Share on other sites
Nidwin Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 A lot of sexual men on the hunt and some asexual men that are actively seeking to get laid because they enjoy sex so much. Happy now Tele ? Link to post Share on other sites
Nidwin Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 I know Tele but as the subject was about sexual men seeking "contact" I thought it would be obvious that I wasn't talking about 99% of the male population. Link to post Share on other sites
Nylocke Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 I will put this in the most blunt way possible because my brother actually told me this years ago. Generally for AFAB humans there are 3 types of guys you will come across in your life. 1 the guy that has a crush on you, 2 the guy who wants to get in your pants and 3 the gay guy who you end up being really tight buddies with or if not tight then really good friends. Nowadays it seems that most cishet guys are after sex and nothing more so you will get a lot of number 2 with that being said. As far as number 1 its kinda iffy because you'd have to figure out by means of why the dude has a crush on you. Maybe he was a friend for a long time and had a crush on you like that TV show "friend zone" or maybe he's someone new and probably is just attracted to you. I've only ever had a hand full of guys that ever crushed on me literally just enough to count on my fingers. In most cases for me guys who persue me are only after sex and nothing more and even furthermore if they find out that you're a virgin. You gotta curve these fools like you're curbing a dog literally xD its kinda sad if you ask me ... But anyway I hope my 2 cents was useful. And trust me I've had many turn downs myself being an asexual and this is actually why I don't really date that much. I've only had 3 boyfriends in my whole life and I know for a fact that's way below average for someone who's almost 30. Link to post Share on other sites
LadyPariah Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 15 hours ago, Just like Jughead said: You all can’t seriously tell me you have no clue why a man interested in having a sexual partner would suddenly treat someone differently once they find out they weren’t compatible? If you are confused about this concept you are going to have a lot of disappointment in your life. It's not really that. But instead the fact that an allo guy starts building an intimate relationship with an ace woman right off the bat instead of being friends first and learning who she is and her orientation, then pulling a disappearing act or being rude when he finds out she's ace. There are people on both sides who aren't willing to compromise, and that's their business, but there's no reason to treat someone poorly just because they're not enthusiastic about sex. It's more along the lines of a mistreatment problem, and not treating each other courteously. Link to post Share on other sites
LadyPariah Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 9 minutes ago, Telecaster68 said: For sexuals, if you're attracted to someone, you're attracted to them from the off. It doesn't work in that demi way for most people, of being friends, then sexual attraction developing. So at the point where you realise a relationship isn't going to work, for whatever reason including them being asexual, then you have to rethink the relationship. Many men would still be okay with friendship, but it's not going to continue with the same intensity as when it was the beginnings of a potential relationship. It'll be - amazingly - like being friends. Ghosting or being rude is wrong though, I agree. I think that what most of us are getting hung up on is how everything works backward for allosexuals compared to asexuals/demis. For allos, it seems to be wanting a sexual relationship first, get to know them later. For Demis it's wanting to get to know them first, and maybe a sexual relationship later. For Asexuals it seems more like getting to just know each other and then maybe a romantic relationship later if both parties are definitely okay; but sometimes allosexuals say they're okay with it, but really aren't which can be a relationship-wrecker. And then to my understanding, aro aces don't want anything more than just friends; please correct me if I'm wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
NoLongerActive1234 Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 I think it can happen to anyone, some people have ulterior motives and actually were looking for something sexual/romantic from the get go but don't say it. When they realize that it isn't going to happen, for whatever reason, they ditch you as a friend and disappear. Link to post Share on other sites
vega57 Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 1 hour ago, Telecaster68 said: Good point - although for sexuals, it's more like the things are running in parallel, mostly. Liking someone and getting on with them go hand in hand with being attracted to someone sexually for most people, and getting to know them (if you're attracted to them), includes getting to know them sexually. There can be a number of scenarios that play out until someone gets hurt. If you meet someone and find them sexually attractive, what are *your* TRUE motives? Are *you* looking for "The One" or to just have a "good time"? And, does the other person know what your intentions are? And what happens when or if your intentions change? If you start a sexual relationship with someone and several months later discover that they're not exactly "The One", do you stop having sex with them right away, even if the sex is 'good' and continue to be "friends" with them, or do you end the entire relationship? I've found that the latter is usually true. 41 minutes ago, MistySpring said: "...some people have ulterior motives ..." This is very true. When a sexual finds someone sexually attractive, what ARE their motives? Do they want just sex? Do they want sex + ? Since their motives are often unspoken, how is one to know what they are, or even if they're telling the truth? Link to post Share on other sites
NoLongerActive1234 Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 @vega57 Yeah, I think sexuals (at least those who experience more instant sexual attraction) would think along the lines of that they are open to the idea of something more, like Telecaster68 mentioned, but unfortunately some want to date only without saying that is what they are after. Also if two people hit it off they could have completely different ideas about how they see sex and romance as well (and depending on each case). Like you say are they wanting to hook up or do they want to find their partner for life? What does friendship mean to each person too? For some friendship equals someone you talk about your hobby with and nothing more, for some it is like a romantic partner without the romance. It's tricky knowing what do both parties want out of the relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
umbasa Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 5 hours ago, Nylocke said: I will put this in the most blunt way possible because my brother actually told me this years ago. Generally for AFAB humans there are 3 types of guys you will come across in your life. 1 the guy that has a crush on you, 2 the guy who wants to get in your pants and 3 the gay guy who you end up being really tight buddies with or if not tight then really good friends. Nowadays it seems that most cishet guys are after sex and nothing more so you will get a lot of number 2 with that being said. As far as number 1 its kinda iffy because you'd have to figure out by means of why the dude has a crush on you. Maybe he was a friend for a long time and had a crush on you like that TV show "friend zone" or maybe he's someone new and probably is just attracted to you. I've only ever had a hand full of guys that ever crushed on me literally just enough to count on my fingers. In most cases for me guys who persue me are only after sex and nothing more and even furthermore if they find out that you're a virgin. You gotta curve these fools like you're curbing a dog literally xD its kinda sad if you ask me ... But anyway I hope my 2 cents was useful. And trust me I've had many turn downs myself being an asexual and this is actually why I don't really date that much. I've only had 3 boyfriends in my whole life and I know for a fact that's way below average for someone who's almost 30. I don't think that outlook helps anyone. And I suspect your brother was being overprotective with that outlook and painting as bleak a picture as possible so you would be cautious around new guys. I mean, it looks like it worked but perhaps to an extreme. Link to post Share on other sites
Chimeric Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 6 hours ago, Nylocke said: Nowadays it seems that most cishet guys are after sex and nothing more I'm sorry that's been your experience, but the good news is that's untrue. But if we keep telling women this, they're going to keep overreacting to men approaching them, which is going to prevent men approaching them for friendship, which is going to make the men that approach them for sex (who undoubtedly exist, but again, straight men don't only want sex) stand out, which is going to emphasize the idea that most cishet men want sex because you're looking at a biased sample, and then you have a snake trying to eat its own tail. 6 hours ago, Nylocke said: You gotta curve these fools like you're curbing a dog literally xD Sometimes that's true, but often the resulting friendship is worth it. Link to post Share on other sites
MrDane Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 Sometimes a potential fantastic partnership will be lost as a result of other generalizations than sex. Like Trump-girl meeting Obama-man. Fitness fanatic veggie meet meatlover couch potatoe. “I am afraid that it isnt going to work out, since you are... and I am... ...I wanted this, you wanted that.!” The proces of being un-selected is not nice, but as the sex migth be important to the sexual, then it could be important to have that. If a sexual man turns down a perfectly fine friendship in a badly manner, then shame on him. If a sexual man act stupid, immoral or prejudiced, then call it that. But no need to shame the sexuals for being sexual. I do not bear the shame on my shoulders, until I have done the misdeed. To me, It doesnt destroy a future relationship-quality to start of with sex. Sometimes it is just sex as in ‘this is nice and I like you and would like this niceness with you’ ...and if the girl says ‘no, thanks’, then my immediate reaction is either that this was to quick or that she is not going to develop this relationship any further. There are always shady people and intentions, but I actually think that most people are okay, and if not open, then at least honest. Link to post Share on other sites
vega57 Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 48 minutes ago, MrDane said: If a sexual man act stupid, immoral or prejudiced, then call it that. But no need to shame the sexuals for being sexual It's not that sexuals as a group are being shamed. But there seems to be sooooo many sexuals who behave....badly...leaving OTHER sexuals and non-sexuals to wonder if this is the ways MOST things 'are'... After all, if 10 sexuals approached you for sex, nothing BUT sex, one might get the impression that sexuals want nothing but sex. "There are always shady people and intentions, but I actually think that most people are okay, and if not open, then at least honest." (my highlight thingy isn't working right now.)" See above. You may think that MOST people are okay because YOU are okay. Because YOU are honest (and I must say Mr.Dane, that I believe that you are one of the more HONEST people on this forum because of what you've disclosed about how you feel and what you think. I've asked some pretty tough questions and you've shown a very humble side of you....and I thank you for that) you may believe that MOST others are also honest, and that dishonesty is limited. Meanwhile, I, along with others, have been on the 'other' receiving end. It's not fun. What bothers me most, is that is seems like so many people apply a 'strategy' of sorts to dating, courting and eventually, marriage. Kind of like, "If I do 'A', she'll/he'll respond with 'B'..." and so on. They seem to do this whether they're "in love" or not. It's like life becomes some kind of a chess game...a way of trying to get what you want from someone, and the efforts become worthless. If my husband brings me a cup of coffee, he's doing it out of expecting sex, and NOT (only) because he wants to something 'nice' for me. Link to post Share on other sites
vega57 Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 5 hours ago, Telecaster68 said: It might be that; there are men and women who are that transactional. I think generally there's something more subtle going on. Any idea what that might be? Quote Vega, you asked me about sex and feeling connected, and this is kind of an example of how that can play out. If you're having an enjoyable sexual relationship with someone, you feel more like doing nice stuff for people. It's not a straight 'if I do that, she should do this', any more than say, your spouse organising a nice day out might may you more likely to feel more like making them a drink when you get home. It's just an extension of that togetherness. What I've bolded, I can get on board with. Unfortunately, too many people would believe that if they organize a nice day out, they would anticipate sex later on. The fact that their partner may be inclined to make them a drink would be seen as something 'nice', but not nearly as 'nice' as a sexual interlude. And, they would be disappointed if they didn't get that sex later on, no matter how many or what kind of 'nice' things their partner does for them. We've seen the same typical scenario on these boards before, Tele. Husband complains about how much he does "for his wife" and how he doesn't get sex in return. He takes care of the kids, cooks, puts gas in her car, and STILL she won't provide him with even the occasional hand job. I've also seen where men have written that they don't care how many nice meals his wife makes or how well she takes care of the kids or the house or irons his shirts or picks up his dry cleaning-he just wants sex. I mean, is it any wonder why so many of these women feel like unpaid prostitutes? And yes, I can understand that a husband may feel unappreciated, but is there any way to show appreciation other than sex? Quote It's a really subtle difference, and I can absolutely see how it can get misinterpreted, especially if sometimes it is transactional. You've read the same Dead Bedrooms type forums I have, and there's a phrase for what you're talking about: covert contracts, and they're not good for either side as they're pretty much set up to fail. But they're not always what's going on. Ahhh, yes. The covert contract. And I agree that most of them are guaranteed to fail. While the covert contract isn't always what's going on, I do believe that what's going on does have an element of 'control' to it. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Sally Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 On 1/3/2018 at 10:53 AM, Sevrn said: . I have dealt with mature men who were upfront about what the hoped for from me. I told them my truth, they accepted graciously and were honest that it was not what they wanted. We went our separate ways. I respect that and it does not hurt. There is no lying, no pretending, no playing the long game in the hopes of having sex. That's what I was talking about above when I said I could understand when men made it plain they didn't want friendship only -- i.e., with no sex -- from a women, and I didn't consider it sad or bad. You said it better. Link to post Share on other sites
MrDane Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 Thank you, @vega57! *Let me bring you a cup of coffee!* can you explain ‘covert contract’? Is that: Quid pro quo or I give and then you give something back? I do admit, that in Denmark, the average partygoing 16-23 year old guy, seem pretty focused on sex. And even though we are quite easygoing and free-minded it usually comes with a ‘too much’-vibe. Pushing for sex to be part of the game is probably both offending and irritating to most of the receiving young girls. Some of those guy sound like (when I overhear their conversation in the gym shower) going out with girls is just about getting some. Of those, sexseekers, the good guys are open about it to the girls and the bad one sets up a trap and tries to lure them in. I have many female co-workers, who I work with and am pretty close with. I think that some of the troubles comes from guys, who only see other guys, work with guys, talk with guys, until they want to find a fuckbuddy. They simply dont know what to do with a girl if she does reject his project. Link to post Share on other sites
vega57 Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 33 minutes ago, MrDane said: Thank you, @vega57! *Let me bring you a cup of coffee!* LOL!!! *wipes tears* I think I just spit that *coffee* all over the computer screen from laughing too hard! Can I have another cup, please? I *promise* I'll make it worth your while *winks while twirling hair between fingers*. Quote can you explain ‘covert contract’? Is that: Quid pro quo or I give and then you give something back? Quid pro quo/I give and then you give is part of it. The "covert" aspect is that you're basically setting up the "contract" (Quid pro quo) in your own head, not revealing it to someone else. Covert, after all, means "not openly acknowledged or displayed". Some people are conscious of what they're doing. Others are not, but if it's pointed out to them, they often realize what they're doing. Quote I do admit, that in Denmark, the average partygoing 16-23 year old guy, seem pretty focused on sex. And even though we are quite easygoing and free-minded it usually comes with a ‘too much’-vibe. Pushing for sex to be part of the game is probably both offending and irritating to most of the receiving young girls. Some of those guy sound like (when I overhear their conversation in the gym shower) going out with girls is just about getting some. Of those, sexseekers, the good guys are open about it to the girls and the bad one sets up a trap and tries to lure them in. Now it's *MY* turn to say THANK YOU, MrDane, THANK YOOOOOOOU! It's pretty much the same way here in the US. Unfortunately, too many of those 23 year olds don't mature, and quite a few young ladies end up believing that "all guys are alike" and "all guys only want ONE thing". (And if you think that 16-23 year old guys act they way they act, check out some of the 'matchmaking' sites. Some of those 50+ year olds are pretty darned 'randy'!). And a lot of women complain about it. I knew of several women who said that they had met a man online, and not even 5 minutes into the conversation, he had sent her a picture of an erect penis. That man may have sent that picture to 100 women and sadly, probably at least ONE of them would be impressed and willing to meet him. I have a (girl) friend who was lured into a friends-with-benefits situation in the past few years. From what it appeared like on the outside, he was really into her. She had no idea that he had been pining away for his ex-girlfriend, and when she found out, she told him to take a hike. He started spreading rumors and lies about her, basically spreading their sexual experiences all over work. She was totally humiliated. But here's the rub: They were in their 40s and 50s! She's pretty much sworn off men since then. Quote I have many female co-workers, who I work with and am pretty close with. I think that some of the troubles comes from guys, who only see other guys, work with guys, talk with guys, until they want to find a fuckbuddy. They simply dont know what to do with a girl if she does reject his project. Yeah, I can see that. And unfortunately....again...girls can be just as bad, especially in the 18-22 age range. It's as if people go to college in order to 'hook up' these days. And college/university is 'fertile' ground. Link to post Share on other sites
GLRDT Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 12 hours ago, vega57 said: What bothers me most, is that is seems like so many people apply a 'strategy' of sorts to dating, courting and eventually, marriage. Kind of like, "If I do 'A', she'll/he'll respond with 'B'..." and so on. They seem to do this whether they're "in love" or not. It's like life becomes some kind of a chess game. This! I've just started to recently break off from this line of thinking and want to live a more unconventional life that fits me better giving myself the freedom to just do what seems right without judgement and limitations from myself. I used to think it had to be exactly as you described above but that's never worked for me. It always felt like the way you described was the only option. I'm realizing now that's not true. Link to post Share on other sites
Alwaysthinkingtoomuch Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 Well I don’t know about everyone else but being an asexual is the most isolating feeling. I was with my ex for nearly ten years. Had sex nearly every day more than once a day. It wasn’t until. I stated wondering why I wouldn’t initiate. I never felt that urge. I was usually just having sexual intimacy and loved how it felt but was never attracted sexually or felt compelled to do it on my own. The sex nearly stopped. This was never an isssue until I figured out what asexual was years ago and yes he became different. He knew no different because I’d never mentioned it and I didn’t mind the sex it felt good. It wasn’t until he said “he didn’t want to share “ one night out of the blue. I had no idea why he said that to me during sex. Come to find out it’s nust an excuse for him to tell people that I withheld sex from him. I didn’t. I believe he ended up going poly because he started to say things like “ didnt your cat Edgar Allen Poe’s used to do that?” I’d be like I had a cat by that name. Or you should dye your hair purple, you should grow out your pubes, you should get your nose pierced and tattoos. These were the others, not me. Yeah talk about devastating when you hear this over over a couple years and you see their profiles in all your social media accounts and hidden in his phone This was my most recent experience as an asexual. Unfortunately, it always seems to be the same story.” I don’t want anyone else to take you away so I’ll be insecure and go see other people. Just because he’s insecure? What? I’m the one that’s basically impotent and that’s how it goes huh. My advice to sexual is do t do what my ex did. If you’re serious about a relationship with an asexual go in with the belief that they are highly unlikely to cheat because they have no SEX DRIVE!!! And don’t believe it’s to pull the wool over your eyes. If someone can’t handle the truth or believe you, get rid of them. It means they are only looking out for themselves and aren’t being understanding or compassionate about your sexual dysfunction when it’s bad enough you’ll never know how it feels. Link to post Share on other sites
Chimeric Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 I made a good number of my guy friends while I was in university (I was made sweetheart of a fraternity, despite never having dated or slept with any of the brothers). I maintain that while hookup culture is strong, not all men only want sex, and it perfectly feasible to develop true, platonic friendships between men and women. Further, these generalizations are harmful because it discourages women from realizing this possibility, which leads to the snake-eat- tail scenario I referred to earlier. (sorry for brevity - on mobile and without my morning coffee; anyone willing to bring it to me? ) Link to post Share on other sites
vega57 Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 11 minutes ago, Chimeric said: (sorry for brevity - on mobile and without my morning coffee; anyone willing to bring it to me? ) LOL! I'd bring it to you, but then you'd 'owe' me. Quid pro quo and all... Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Deus Ex Infinity Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 On 1.1.2018 at 4:52 AM, dlnvu19 said: I was wondering if any other asexual women noticed that men tend to treat them differently once you tell them you're not interested in sex and you end up having to guide 90% of the relationship? My partner did the most amazing job in adjusting himself to my needs after coming out last year. So yeah, he actually did change to keep the relationship alive for both of us. I bet it must be quite difficult for him since he needs to slow down and surpress most of his natural urges for most of the time but he told me that it's gonna be fine. It's a massive sign of serious commitment and devotion I highly appreciate. I think it's quite difficult for alosexual men to deal with asexual women because they just don't know how to treat or act properly without making any mistakes or hurt their partners. I guess it's mainly based on fear or insecure thoughts. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 PSA from your local moderator: I understand this thread is going to be a bit controversial at points due to the nature of the thread. However, please do be careful when making generalizations about sections of the population, to not go across the line into insulting. Serran Asexual Relationships Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
Nylocke Posted January 16, 2018 Share Posted January 16, 2018 On 1/5/2018 at 5:24 PM, umbasa said: I don't think that outlook helps anyone. And I suspect your brother was being overprotective with that outlook and painting as bleak a picture as possible so you would be cautious around new guys. I mean, it looks like it worked but perhaps to an extreme. Yea my brother is overprotective but also a hypocrite so nothing new is there. There is some truth to what he says though. And here I thought I was just getting a cishet male perspective when he was saying all that to me that day. On 1/5/2018 at 5:34 PM, Chimeric said: I'm sorry that's been your experience, but the good news is that's untrue. But if we keep telling women this, they're going to keep overreacting to men approaching them, which is going to prevent men approaching them for friendship, which is going to make the men that approach them for sex (who undoubtedly exist, but again, straight men don't only want sex) stand out, which is going to emphasize the idea that most cishet men want sex because you're looking at a biased sample, and then you have a snake trying to eat its own tail. Sometimes that's true, but often the resulting friendship is worth it. And I was gonna say my mom tells me that all the time that all men are after sex. She doesn't even like my boyfriend because she feels he is only after sex even though I'm 1000 miles away from him and we've been together almost a year withing having had sex ... o_o Though I said "most" guys and not "all" guys or else I would have taken my parent's advice and broke it off with my boyfriend after moving. In my personal experience no one approaches anyone for nothing, there is an agenda that is needed to be had, or a purpose to be obtained. That is the reason anyone approaches anyone whether it be man to woman or woman to man, because woman can be opportunists as well as they wanna pinch a dude by the wallet at times. Link to post Share on other sites
Chimeric Posted January 17, 2018 Share Posted January 17, 2018 9 hours ago, Nylocke said: Though I said "most" guys and not "all" guys or else I would have taken my parent's advice and broke it off with my boyfriend after moving. In my personal experience no one approaches anyone for nothing, there is an agenda that is needed to be had, or a purpose to be obtained "Most" guys is still an inaccurate generalization. A friendship could be on the agenda! Link to post Share on other sites
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