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mari

There are any men on here?

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AndrewT

I'm 38, male and so much of what others have said is true or me.

 

In my 20's even though I had not come out as Asexual (that has been a very recent thing even to myself), I was at work during the week, played/watched spots and/or went out for a drink at the weekend, the month and years went by.

 

As I've got older I think being alone got harder, mates got married had kids, and in turn went out less, played a lot less sports (none) and spent a lot more time alone. I still have little interest in a relationship, but at the same time I'm not fond of always being alone.

 

I've recently gone to university full time which I am enjoying but even though I've made some friends, I don't really get involved in any of the parties etc the age gap is hard, so still spend a lot of time alone.

 

I'm not open about my Asexuality in rl as it is none of their business 

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Yeast

Male, 60, and no interest in sex, ever. Not even curious. Never felt there was anything wrong with me. Didn't know what asexuals were before I discovered AVEN in my late 50's. Don't really think of myself in terms of my gender. I'm not a label. Certainly never was concerned with what others might think of me. I'm too mostly a loner and I agree this isolation can be difficult at times.  Knew only one person who seemed to accept me the way I am but they died awhile ago.  Don't think I've ever actually met another asexual. I'd be glad to but in the mid western US people tend to have stereotypical views of human sexuality. I doubt they have any concept there are people like me. I feel a bit like a unicorn sometimes which everyone around me believes is just another horse.  Nice to know I'm not the last unicorn, though.  

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Wild Seven

Honestly I think it's more the age & interest kind of thing.

 

Men in their late 20s+ are likely to have so many other interests / frequent other forums, than one talking about an experience they don't experience, and aren't after. I mean, if you don't experience it, what's the point of having lengthy discussions about it, unless an academic or such interest? The kind of logic.

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nate-1234

Man right here! I am more of a boy though because I am a teenager.

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Moon Spirit ☽

No man has ever joined this site so women have started posing as men. If you're talking to a man on here then she's probably a he.

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nate-1234
1 minute ago, Wish Bear 🌠 said:

No man has ever joined this site so women have started posing as men. If you're talking to a man on here then she's probably a he.

Hey that's mean! :P 

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nate-1234
5 minutes ago, Wish Bear 🌠 said:

No man has ever joined this site so women have started posing as men. If you're talking to a man on here then she's probably a he.

And don't you mean "he's probably a she"?

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Skycaptain

There are FTM transfolk on here :P

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Moon Spirit ☽
58 minutes ago, nate-1234 said:

And don't you mean "he's probably a she"?

No, the other way around.

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Moon Spirit ☽
12 minutes ago, Skycaptain said:

There are FTM transfolk on here :P

Oh no, I wasn't referring to them. I was just answering the OP's question in a silly way.

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Yeast
5 hours ago, Wish Bear 🌠 said:

No man has ever joined this site so women have started posing as men. If you're talking to a man on here then she's probably a he.

I really am a man, or at least male. I just can't prove it.

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Grimnir

47 year old male here, came out as Ace last year. It's made a lot of sense to me, looking back over past relationships. I was never sex averse, had a reasonable libido (long gone on these meds...) and thought I was just anti-social. Well, turns out I had Aspergers and was Ace - and maybe a little anti-social :P

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Cnyb

48 y.o. male here.

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TheLastOfSheila

Welcome, my Ace brothers.  Good to see you here!

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fto1818

 I am a 47 year old male and just became aware of my asexuality. Better late than never I guess :D.

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Cnyb

Have some cake: :cake:

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john e. resler

I am male and have been asexual all my memorable life. I have not always discussed it openly with anyone except my wife, and a psychologist.  how many of us there are is hard to know for sure because of the very social beliefs of sexual roles of men and women.  Women traditionally have actually been expected to be asexual by nature. Men are expected to be sex crazed beasts. To be different from these "social norms" have until recently been considered perverted and physical threats were constant. fortunately things have started to change for everyone. BTW I am 65 years old, life hasn't been easy. 

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mari
24 minutes ago, john e. resler said:

I am male and have been asexual all my memorable life. I have not always discussed it openly with anyone except my wife, and a psychologist.  how many of us there are is hard to know for sure because of the very social beliefs of sexual roles of men and women.  Women traditionally have actually been expected to be asexual by nature. Men are expected to be sex crazed beasts. To be different from these "social norms" have until recently been considered perverted and physical threats were constant. fortunately things have started to change for everyone. BTW I am 65 years old, life hasn't been easy. 

You are a lucky man John, you found someone to share your life for 35 years. I would like to walk in your shoes 😢

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john e. resler

Learn to love yourself and when you look up they will be there for you.

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john e. resler
On 1/16/2018 at 2:28 PM, Wish Bear 🌠 said:

No man has ever joined this site so women have started posing as men. If you're talking to a man on here then she's probably a he.

and this proves my point  I am male  and i believe there are several others like me and hopefully you will take the time to get to know one or two of us it could be a real education for you.

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Urishir

My theory is most asexual men just get disillusioned with life and dont ever find out there is aven to join in the first place.

 

As much as id like to find a partner (not that much but slightly more than being alone) having tried bit of online "dating" i just cant see it being worth the social anxiety and general bother. 

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john e. resler

the social anxiety will diminish if you have partners. Trust me it is very worth the struggles

 

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Avian

I can relate to the original poster, as I too feel the sting of being alone from time to time. I mean, who has ever heard of a gay male asexual?  If men in general are such a minority within the asexual community, then gay-identified men are a considerable sub-minority within that group. No wonder I get depressed!

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john e. resler

maybe i am confused but how is it possible to be homosexual  and asexual at the same time?

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AndrewT
20 minutes ago, john e. resler said:

maybe i am confused but how is it possible to be homosexual  and asexual at the same time?

Someone that is attracted to the same gender just not sexually.

 

I'm Asexual but I'm still attracted to people (normally their personality after I've got to know them) just not sexually. 

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Tja
11 minutes ago, john e. resler said:

maybe i am confused but how is it possible to be homosexual  and asexual at the same time?

I've used homoromantic asexual and homoAsexual, as I have sensual, not sexual, attractions to men.

Some people identify as demisexual (?)*I think that's correct* Where they can be sexual with someone with whom they've formed a relationship.

I generally just use asexual, for myself, and leave it at that.

 

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Always looking for answers
On 14-1-2018 at 8:28 PM, Andrew001 said:

I've recently gone to university full time which I am enjoying but even though I've made some friends, I don't really get involved in any of the parties etc the age gap is hard, so still spend a lot of time alone

Yeah I know, I'm the loner at university as well :) I'm 35 and all my fellow students are in their early twenties, so while they start living on their own and being anxious about their first job when they graduate, I can't wait to be amongst people of my own age when I can finally get a job.

Just hang in there, it's only a few years! 

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Tja
23 hours ago, Avian said:

I can relate to the original poster, as I too feel the sting of being alone from time to time. I mean, who has ever heard of a gay male asexual?  If men in general are such a minority within the asexual community, then gay-identified men are a considerable sub-minority within that group. No wonder I get depressed!

I just think of us as even more special than the already special people here. ;):D

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john e. resler

i have been called polyamorous because i love people of both sexes but i am asexual because the very thought of sex with anyone is so repulsive to me so i do now understand what you were trying to actually say

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Skycaptain
8 hours ago, john e. resler said:

maybe i am confused but how is it possible to be homosexual  and asexual at the same time?

As @Tjamentioned there's numerous terms, and different forms of attraction 

 

Many people feel romantic attraction (love for want of a better term) without feeling attracted sexually 

 

Homoromantic, hetero romantic, biromantic and panromantic are a few of the popular terms in this area 

 

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