How would you react to being asked out

[Guest Jetsun Milarepa]

On more than one occasion I've said in a joking tone 'Oh! you must have poor taste in women! I'd go for someone else if I were you, I'm off the market!'

[Ldlelee]

I had quite a few people ask me out over the years. I almost never took it well. The first time it happened, I was so shocked that I dropped my books on the floor. I had to tell him that I'd think about it so that I could run away and scream internally. (I told him no later on.)

 

I got a little better at it afterward, and I did end up having a couple of relationships, but because I'm oblivious to romance, they crumbled in a matter of months. (One of my ex-boyfriends reported to a friend that he felt "dead" when he was with me. Ouch.) Since high school, whenever someone hits on me or asks me out, I just tell them that I'm not interested in having a relationship. If they take that the wrong way, then that's not my problem. I was only being honest.

[Destan]

Hahaha, never been asked out, but I would react just like when flirting:

internally freak out and shocked in awkward silence, creeped out, get angry because I'm offended/betrayed for some reason and lastly reply harshly no

[Mirari]

I would just smile politely and say that I'm flattered but I'm not interested in dating them without mention my asexuality (unless they ask, of course). I've had this happen once before when a girl I'd only known briefly online asked me out, and I'll admit I did feel I slight guilt towards it.

 

On a side note, I always find it kind of strange when people ask out others that they barely know.

[Flump222]

Well, I've never been asked out, but I'd probably just say I don't feel that way about them, and just be friends.

[will123]

I've never been asked out but have asked a couple of girls out that were in my social circle. If I had been asked out in my younger years (before I was aware of asexuality) I'd probably would take them up for a coffee or movie.

 

Nowadays I'd probably be very leery of the person's motives and likely say no.

[Lirpaderp]

I'd probably laugh. It'd be rude, but that was the only reaction I can imagine me having. Depending on who it was I might say yes (once my laughter stopped) but treat it as a friendship. I'm curious about it but I don't know if it'd be right for me. If sex or kissing was ever an option I'd be out, but holding hands and possibly cuddling could be nice.

[SquidKen]

I've been asked out a few times in school, though mostly by the kind of unscrupulous guys that I never would want to even be near.  I gave them a no,  and was more careful about how I acted around them.  I was even worse at picking up in anything in school than I am now, but eventually figured out that how I was acting was throwing people off. I was always on the verge of mean and angry,  and playful.  I still don't really get it, I prefer people just saying what they mean.  I got asked out by one guy I absolutely could not stand because he treated me like utter garbage,  and by a friend's older brother. I said yes to one guy who asked me out before starting my first year of high school because I didn't know anyone at all,  and didn't want to be alone.  We dated a month before I broke up with him. I didn't feel anything for him, but we stayed friends. I got asked out by a different guy who I said yes to,  he was a senior when I was a freshman (I was 14, he was 18) and I couldn't ever tell whether we were dating or he had asked me out again. He was upset when I told him that I didn't think I would ever want sex, and he was rather sexually aggressive.  I liked him, but it was a stupid relationship. Next guy asked me out through a note and candy, and it lasted three years, but lack of sex and me being ftm ruined it. We stayed friends until he told me I wasted three years of his life by not having sex, and we don't really talk now. I didn't know I was ace until I think the last year of us dating or maybe the last half. My best friend asked me out during that time, and of course I said no, I was dating already. However, we're dating now. There wasn't really any asking out, I bought him flowers and presents and eventually he called me his boyfriend and I agreed that I was. I gave him presents when we were in school too, and used to bring a hot thermos of tea for him on cold days when I brought myself some. I guess that's why he asked me out, but I did all that because he was my best friend, kinda my only real friend for a long time. It kinda pissed off the guy I was dating that I was doing that, but I honestly didn't understand why that was bad. I'm still not sure. I don't see why going "man, it's cold, I want tea. Hey, my best buddy likes tea too, I'll bring him some" was bad.

[Searching_for_solitude]

The only time I have ever been asked out was by my friend of eight years, she didn’t get the whole asexual thing unfortunately and was under the impression she could ‘fix’ me.... she asked me out and I just replied with “what? Why?” 

 

 

[TheNerdyOne]

I've only been asked out once. In my earlier college years, I was in this Human Relations class, and the guy who sat beside me and I were just acquaintances. I didn't mind talking to him, but I wasn't the slightest bit interested in him. So suddenly four or five weeks into the quarter while I'm waiting for my ride, he asks me if I'd like to go out for coffee.

I was stunned. Up to that point, no one had ever shown interest in me before, so I was very unprepared. I faltered with my words. The answer was clearly no, but he caught me so off guard. So I stumbled over something about being really busy with homework at the time and he understood. After that point, I just didn't know how to handle myself around him, knowing he felt that way about me.

I thought it was over after that. But then one or two classes later, he asked me if I'd like him to give me a ride home and offered transportation for the quarter.

That was just too far. I still stammered a bit, but I was able to give a more definite "no" type answer. I definitely dodged a bullet - he had the highest anger score of the entire class.

[Éadweard]

I normally just say, “thank you but I’m not interested”

[Guest]

Thinking about this again, I would decline if it was some random person on the street but would be delighted if it was someone I had built up a good emotional connection with. For me I think I need to get to know someone first before taking that step though. I couldn't go on a date based on looks because it means nothing. I want someone that connects well with me, has similar interests and a good personality.