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DayTripperYeah

newgirl: I was being serious. This is one topic, I don't find the humor in. Just my humble opinion, is all.

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Frigid Pink

I think it is great that those of you who have not had sex did not give into any of the pressure that your experiences may have placed on you.

I want to be able to do what is best for me and not allow myself to give into pressure and do anything I don't really want to do (and that goes for everything in addition to sex).

And if it is something I want to try, then I want it to be because I want to.

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DayTripperYeah

All too true, FrigidPink. That's why I think I'm only borderline asexual, I feel attraction, no one ever shares my feelings, and those that do, I'm not attracted to.

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Add me to the list, TeddyMiller, age 48.

Done!

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I think i might be a grey asexual or a sexual virgin waiting for the right man to lost my virginity too. This is me right now "I experiences sexual attraction and drive,but not strong enough to want to act on them."

Grey asexual:

* people who do not normally experience sexual attraction, but do experience it sometimes

* people who experience sexual attraction, but a low sex drive

* people who are technically sexual, but feel that it's not an important part of their lives and don't identify with standard sexual culture

* people who experience sexual attraction and drive, but not strongly enough to want to act on them

* people who can enjoy and desire sex, but only under very limited and specific circumstances

* people who experience some parts of sexuality but not others, according to a theoretical model such as Rabger's

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newgirl: I was being serious. This is one topic, I don't find the humor in. Just my humble opinion, is all.

Humor is a person best friend but being too serious will get a person a heart attack. I'm not going to let my virginity make me sad.I'm going to laugh.

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DayTripperYeah

newgirl--I'm digging that bulleted list. :)

Thanks for posting. Many of those points

described my situation to a 'T' and I'm sure

many others can relate too. Thank you for

posting that. :aven:

I was going to post a smiley until I noticed

that there is actually an *aven* one. How

cool is that? :)

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  • 1 month later...

I'm young, but I've "grown up" quite a bit in the past couple years, although, I feel even younger than I really am..... kinda like I'm having a second chance at childhood or something.

Hmmmm.... for me, I find the "being a virgin" thing a bit of a non-issue. If I'm not even going to date or entertain the notion, that topic really doesn't come up in normal conversation.

Never been kissed? Who cares? Honestly, honey, you ain't missing much. Actually, not missing anything.

If true romance actually existed, which it does not, then that'd be different. But, to guys, sex is the be and the end all. Not to knock on guys, but I'm actually glad I'm not a guy because having to cater to the little head's every whim would get annoying after awhile. :oops:

But, I'm sure guys can also make a case about our monthly internal hemorrhaging. Yes, that is a pain in the ass. :shock: Quite literally, too. :lol:

Maybe if more women realized that guys only see us as their housekeepers, nannies, and sex slaves, far fewer of us would be biting the hooks.

My life is absolutely perfect now, with my cats, my wide network of friends, and old-school NES in the living room. lol. Then, when I move to FL soon, my life will be even more perfect because no more winter!!! Woo-hoo!!!

Again, I just want to throw out that disclaimer that I really do NOT hate guys. I like guys, but ONLY as friends. EVER. I've been told too many stories, by the guys themselves, that would make one's poker-straight hair curl. And that, my friends, is how I've come to the conclusions that I have -- straight from the horse's mouth!

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I agree with you, Zanedia. What's the big deal? I mean, so what if some people in this big world aren't getting any? If we're happy, then why do other people make like it's such a big prob?

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I notice submissive men can be romantic???

Absolutely right. I'm submissive and also romantic. And also another member of the virgin club at 54 years old.

Although I'm perfectly happy about having a sex-drive thats hardly been out of the garage, the downside is that I am a very loving, tactile type of bloke who adores women, and who likes everything about closeness and intimacy with women - except the actual sex bit. And all my life it's been damn hard to find one without the expectation of the other, as I expect a lot of you will have found. Bummer!

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  • 4 weeks later...
Rikusephirosu

Kissing does seem boring.. I dont know how people say they felt heat "rush to places" when your mouth is veryyyy far from that "area" :? Im gonna take my virginity to my grave! I was born with it after all..I see no reason why not to die with it too.

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I think it is great that those of you who have not had sex did not give into any of the pressure that your experiences may have placed on you.

I want to be able to do what is best for me and not allow myself to give into pressure and do anything I don't really want to do (and that goes for everything in addition to sex).

And if it is something I want to try, then I want it to be because I want to.

I guess the hardest thing to get across to people, is that:

"There wasn't any pressure to have sex."

I didnt want sex so there wasnt going to be sex. I didnt tell people so they weren't hanging over me telling me to try it. So I had no peer pressure to go out and do it.

What I did have was the need to not tell anyone that I was a virgin and that I was going to stay a virgin. If I had told people, then I would have gotten teased and pressured.

So Fridged-Pink, there wasn't any pressure to give into.

I think and I can be wrong, but I think that the younger generation is placing alot of pressure upon themselves by telling people they are gay or they are asexual or they are lesbian or they are whatever. Why tell people? It's none of their business. Be who you are and don't worry about telling everyone else who you are and then putting up with their criticisms.

I'm 55 and a virgin and It's what I wanted and I am very glad I have remained a virgin and it has NOT been difficult to be a virgin. It's NOT a burden.

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Rikusephirosu

I agree. :?

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  • 2 weeks later...
I think and I can be wrong, but I think that the younger generation is placing alot of pressure upon themselves by telling people they are gay or they are asexual or they are lesbian or they are whatever. Why tell people? It's none of their business. Be who you are and don't worry about telling everyone else who you are and then putting up with their criticisms.

I'm 55 and a virgin and It's what I wanted and I am very glad I have remained a virgin and it has NOT been difficult to be a virgin. It's NOT a burden.

Ziffler,

I agree with some of your post about young generation but what happens an asexual virgin wants to date and still remain a virgin.I think being honest with a person about your virginity will get rid of some rotten apples while dating.

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  • 1 month later...
If true romance actually existed, which it does not, then that'd be different. But, to guys, sex is the be and the end all. Not to knock on guys, but I'm actually glad I'm not a guy because having to cater to the little head's every whim would get annoying after awhile.

Amen to that.

Maybe if more women realized that guys only see us as their housekeepers, nannies, and sex slaves, far fewer of us would be biting the hooks."

That's why I've never bitten the hooks!

Again, I just want to throw out that disclaimer that I really do NOT hate guys. I like guys, but ONLY as friends. EVER. I've been told too many stories, by the guys themselves, that would make one's poker-straight hair curl. And that, my friends, is how I've come to the conclusions that I have -- straight from the horse's mouth!

I second that!

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SorryNotSorry

I'm 40, if that can be considered old. I've never had sex, and I don't really dream of the day when I'll experience it. Nor do I feel gypped by never having had sex.

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Imma virgin and I have no problems remaining that way (unlike some people)

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Remember... people don't want you to change to make you happy, they want you to change to make them happy!

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Remember... people don't want you to change to make you happy, they want you to change to make them happy!

This quote is very true for virgins who want to date nonvirgins(losing virginity).

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I am not a virgin. I have had sex a number of times, trying to experience what is supposed to make the earth move, etc.

I am glad I am not a virgin, because I have been there, done that, and I know what I am NOT missing. :)

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Thank you for letting us all know we're not missing much. :D

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Remember... people don't want you to change to make you happy, they want you to change to make them happy!

Exactly. I believe you're referring to someone who's trying to have sex with you for selfish reasons but it also applies to people like parents. I was the son that was 'odd'. I think that's the real reason they tried to get me to get counseling. Not to make my life happier but so I wouldn't be an embarresment to them anymore.

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I think people sometimes want you to change because, in their not-so-infinite wisdom, they are certain that it will make you happy.

They don't realize how valid your choices are and how valid your unchosen orientation is. This is a part of majority mentality in general; with some exceptions, majoriteers have their Mickey Mouse ears on and their minds parked--regarding differences between themselves and a given minority.

I think it is especially true with sex. Not only is there inherent bias, but there are laws and judgments deeply embedded in the culture.

I'm with Jay...been there, done that dozens of times, and found that the earth did not budge.

osito

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I think people sometimes want you to change because, in their not-so-infinite wisdom, they are certain that it will make you happy.

They don't realize how valid your choices are and how valid your unchosen orientation is. This is a part of majority mentality in general; with some exceptions, majoriteers have their Mickey Mouse ears on and their minds parked--regarding differences between themselves and a given minority.

I think it is especially true with sex. Not only is there inherent bias, but there are laws and judgments deeply embedded in the culture.

I'm with Jay...been there, done that dozens of times, and found that the earth did not budge.

osito

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