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Anyone else not had a girlfriend/boyfriend and not been on a date?


Divide By Zero

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knittinghistorian

I've never had a boyfriend or been on a date.  With this caveat: I have had a couple of friends who were guys, and we did things together, so it's entirely possible that the OTHER party regarded it as a date unbeknownst to me.

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I've never had a g/b friend or been on a date

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I’ve had a couple first dates but it was a bit disasterous 😂

 

It had to do with the dates  being denied hookups they thought were going to happen (this was before I realized I was ace)

 

I’m romantic and much more prefer the ideas of starting as friends with someone

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On 11/5/2017 at 3:17 PM, neecee said:

Yeah, I'm 23 and I've never had a S.O or been on any dates. 

 

The thought of it usually never bothers me, but every now and again I'll get into a mood where I crave companionship.  

 

Which then leads to me looking into dating websites or just trying to make new friends online, and then getting scared off when anyone shows any type of romantic interest, or falling outta touch when I don't know how to keep a conversation going...

 

I get a little annoyed with myself when that happens.

Same! This is also exacerbated by the fact that I have several friends who have met their spouses with online dating and are constantly pushing me in that direction.

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SallyBlackwater

I've never been on a date or ever had a significant other. I've had very few crushes, but even then, whenever I thought seriously about being in a relationship, I felt like something wasn't right. I just like my freedom, probably xD then there's the fact that most people my age expect sex, and that puts a lot of pressure on me. Honestly the only way I might feel comfortable in a relationship would be if I found someone who is asexual and shares similar life goals with me, but it's so difficult to find people like that near me.... 

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Yeah, I am 37 and have never had a relationship partner either, still a virgin too:)

 

did have a couple crushes as a teenager though, (never did approached them).

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Just echoing the others here--I'm 21 and never had a relationship or even been on a date. Have never asked anyone out or been asked out. I don't try to do this but somehow I end up having almost 0 contact with the opposite sex. I've had a few crushes but I'm the most chicken person to have ever chickened. I can find the hypervolume of a 4th dimensional object no problem but can't ask a girl out!

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Hermit Advocate

Had 2 boyfriends. I ended both relationships before they got really serious. I cold have easily lived without dating anyone. It was a complete waste of time. 

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Mostly.  I've been on a couple of first dates that didn't progress further than that.  I don't understand online dating (or real dating for that matter).  I've been on nearly every single one and I don't get much out of them.

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Guest community6seasons

 

This is a really great and heartwarming topic. You simply can't imagine how relieved I feel coming here. I too haven't been in a relationship. I always tend to withdraw into my shell and find it difficult to connect with others. I have a difficult personality and neither am I blessed in the looks department. For so many years I always assumed that something's wrong with me. All my friends fell in love and got married or met their better halves through arranged marriage (I am from India where that's the norm). However I simply couldn't bring myself to do the whole arranged marriage dance. It always scared and baffled me. I never even knew asexual was a thing. By chance I came across a review of a Riverdale episode where it's revealed that Jughead is an asexual. That's when I realised that I too am probably an asexual. I am in my early 30s now and I see myself being single forever; I am not sure how do I go about searching for a fellow asexual in India. Frankly I am ok with this state of affairs. But it's difficult to bring my relation's to my viewpoint.

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I almost dated two people, but it did not work out.

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blueheroness

I haven't been on a date ever. I was hanging out with a guy once and I got the feeling that he wanted it to be a date but it totally wasn't. It doesn't count if I randomly asked him for a ride to the bookstore and then he suggested we get fast-food. 😂😂

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I’ve never dated, never had a bf/gf and I’ve got no idea what I am romantically. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I’ve never had boyfriend or girlfriend, never kissed and I’m pretty sure I’ve never had crushes, only squishes.

I’ve been on few dates, but afterwards either I’ve wanted to be just friends with them or never see them again.

My friend once said that if she liked girls romantically we could have started dating, only thigh I could think was “how I can say I’m not interested in having relationship?”

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Never had a s/o, nor did I had a date, but I haven't shown interest in those stuff either

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Fantastic Name

Never. I've had crushes, but that's it.

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Most I've ever done is kissed someone on the cheek during 6th grade truth or dare. I immediately ran to the bathroom and washed my mouth out. That was apparently a very uncool thing to do. 

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I've never gone on a date, never been asked out, and never had a crush. I'm okay with that, but I am interested in a romantic relationship (Maybe. Since I've never been in one, I don't know what it's like)

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No, I never had a girlfriend or a boyfriend. However, when I was a bit younger, there was this one boy at camp who asked me out and we "dated" for a day or so. He kept putting his hand on the small of my back (I hate when anyone does that to me) and he quickly got so possessive of me and would not let me out of his sight. So, I broke it off. I do not really count him as a boyfriend though.

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Never had an s/o, been on a date, or even had my first kiss yet and I'm graduating college in a few months! I love this thread, it makes me feel so much less alone haha. For the most part I don't really care too much about not being in a relationship but sometimes I get the craving for one just to have someone to spend time with and cuddle and all that good stuff. I do eventually want an s/o (at least in theory) I just haven't found the motivation to actively seek someone out yet

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EmotionalAndroid

I have never been on a date, never been in a relationship, and never had the desire to be in one.

 

I've had squishes, but never crushes. In college, I really really wanted to befriend a fellow student and always loved spending time with him, but I did not want a romantic relationship with him. I just wanted to be his friend and get to talk to him more often.

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My one and only date was good, but it was not for me. Btw it helped me realise my orientation.

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questioningmyself

Hello!

I am new to this forum, and have been questioning myself for a few months time. I as well have never had a relationship with anyone whether that includes dates or sex, and have no desire to do so. I do have desires in which I like fictional characters or others who are unobtainable such as idols and singers. People who I know I'd probably never meet in real life and if I did the possibility of a relationship is null. I find people repulsive, even ones that are considered attractive and I find to match the physical characteristics of male figures in books. Glad I'm not the only one!

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I had like two boyfriends when I was 12/13, we only went as far as holding hands and then I broke up with them immediately. They were nice enough guys and definitely felt more for me than I did for them.

Then I was kissed by a female friend when I was 14 which was casual and fine, I kinda had a thing for her, and she liked flirting with everyone. I was.. made out with unconsensually by a male friend when I was 19 which was horrible. And that was it! I don't count any of these as a first kiss since I didn't choose to kiss them. I haven't actually wanted to kiss anyone thus far.

I did go on two blind dates, and two follow-up dates with girls. We didn't match personality-wise at all. And nothing happened except for hugging. I tried online-dating but I always flee the scene as soon as they want to meet. Now I wrote I am only looking for friends.

 

So yeah, I've basically been very single all my life.

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I am sixteen and going to turn seventeen soon, I have never kissed, dated or had a relashionship with a boy, I have a crush on a boy who studied with me when I was eleven, he talks to me the most and we were friends, it seemed to me that he likes me but I didn’t really know if it’s true, we were just kids back then, I still have a crush on him but it’s just that I don’t see myself in a relationship, I am a Heteroromantic Ace who likes seeing romantic relationships and has romantic thoughts, but in reality I just don’t want a relashionship at all.

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Me. I'm 41 and have never been on a date or had a boyfriend/girlfriend in the conventional sense.

 

Actually, you know what? That's not true. I have been on a date, but I didn't realize it was a date at the time and it was terribly weird and awkward. Actually, there were several of those, only I thought we were just meeting for coffee or lunch or dinner or whatever. Or a friend said, "Hey, why don't you go meet up with this friend of mine?" and I did, and only later realized that it was an attempted set-up. Which just goes to show that this stuff is so inconsequential to me that when I think about dating and the way people date, I don't even count those experiences as dates. They never registered. 

 

I also did have a single instance of sexual attraction to someone once. I decided it was time to act on it and the moment the guy and I started kissing, it felt so wrong that I just stopped him and started laughing. It was like kissing a wall or something. Poor guy, he was probably terribly insulted. 

 

I have had very intense intellectually intimate relationships with people and I wouldn't hesitate to say that I really do love some of these folks. But I don't want to live with or have sex with any of them. 

 

 

 

 

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fan fanackapan

I had one or two boyfriends back in the early 90s. Nothing since, which I'm ok with, except I might be open to a relationship of some kind, simply because life as an asexual gets very lonely when all your friends move away to do marriage/relationships and have kids and you're left every night with your computer and radio for company.

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Dated a few times over the years to see if it was for me. Friends sometimes make you do things you don't want to do.

 

I was very out of my element my first few dates, and I had no desire for the usual expectations during a date (kissing, hugging, etc.). I played along as best as I could, but I'm sure it was pretty obvious to them that I was not digging it. 

 

I originally took these experiences as being anxious, but after a couple more dates and getting more comfortable it became pretty obvious I just didn't like the experience.

 

Sorry to those that I led on! :D

 

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Never been on a date, never had a boyfriend either, I had the opportunity once but that my friend is a long complicated story as to why I didn't take it

 

Honestly I don't find anything wrong with it, I think that there's a difference between wanting to be in a relationship and wanting to be in a relationship with a certain person. If you meet a certain person that makes you want to be in a relationship then that's great! If you just wanna be in a relationship cause you're lonely or whatever, no one will ever fill that loneliness

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