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Does anyone else forget their body exists?


ThatHuman

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  • 1 month later...

Not sure if this is weird, but on the rare occurrences I feel past agender just enough to be a demiboy, I get dysphoria, as if I had a female body, which... I do not. It’s really odd.

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PerhapsSomeHotCocoa

I don't necessarily forget my body... it's more like I feel detached from my body. Like my soul and my body are two separate entities inhabiting the same space. Basically roommates that are trying to tolerate one another.

 

I swear I didn't mean that to sound so angsty xD

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Yeah. This kind of things happen to me all the time. I tend to forget how I look like, if that makes any sense. It's normal that sometimes I'm dressing up and forget that I have boobs and I have to put on the bra until I feel the tshirt. Or when I want to use a skirt but people get uncomfortable because physically I'm not "cute" enough to use one (I look like a guy in a dress? My physique is actually really weird, I sometimes think I might be on the edge of intersex).

 

I would say that even when I would definitely prefer a flat chest (for free of movement and practical purposes) I wouldn't like a male body either. People reminding me that my body is an impediment even if it's because of collective unconscious, make me wish i could be devoided of any physical features. 

 

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Honestly, I don't really forget that I have a body (logically I know I have one because I can see it), but I sort of forget about how it looks. Sometimes, when I'm not looking into the mirror or when I'm comfortable (and not paying much attention to my body) I realized that in my mind I am vague and neutral, and it's not really clear to me what gender I am. In that state, when I look at myself/hear my voice I feel kind of jarred/mildly put out. Like...it's too gendered...or material...or something. Actually, even when I do look in the mirror sometimes I'll feel like that, too. I almost wish that people would view me as they would a random cat or another animal...not really knowing its gender but not really caring either (because male and female cats look/sound pretty much the same)...or if they know it they don't quite expect anything of the animal/it's still something meaningless that mostly resides at the back of their minds. Idk if that makes any sense but this is the first time I've put it in words, I guess.

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On 11/18/2017 at 10:54 PM, WoodwindWhistler said:

Here is my first post about it, but there have been other threads by other users since (they're starting to call it "depersonalization" which I myself don't think is a very useful term)

I think depersonalization isn't quite the same as what you described, though it wouldn't surprise me if they were related.  DP is more about not feeling real, not just not thinking of oneself as having a body.  For me, it involved obsessive thoughts about philosophy and the nature of reality, and some weird sensory stuff... though I also don't think I really think of myself as having a body, even when my DP isn't that bad.

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  • 2 months later...
WoodwindWhistler
On 1/3/2018 at 7:19 PM, Zacharie said:

when I want to use a skirt but people get uncomfortable because physically I'm not "cute" enough to use one

 

Well I can't speak to the rest of your post (actually I 100% get not wanting boobs mainly for hassle reasons but not necessarily wanting a male body either: androgynous CG people who have no genitalia are I guess you could call it slightly-dysphoria inducing because it seems familiar and applicable to me) but that part where you're not "cute enough" sounds like internalized toxic cultural programming that you should kill with fire. No one is "not cute enough" to wear a skirt- fat manly men with beards should be able to wear a skirt and not be bothered about it one bit. Judgemental cis standards be damned. 

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I've found this only happens to me after specific circumstances:

  • Lucid dream where I am someone/something else
  • Having done a lot of stuff that makes me feel fitter than I am
  • Disassociating
  • Hyperfocus
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Janus the Fox

I tend to lose the realization of the physical self for perhaps more than Gender reasons.  I can feel for myself more as Therian, an animalistic spiritual form and have Tulpas that's often Voices and separations of the self and poor spacial awareness, when not the body transcends the mental self, can mean I'm prone to walking into things or problems of walking and not able to do most things people take for granted.  It is in part blamed on being Autistic primarily first, then anything else.  I can assume the lack of a gender and an unstable fluid one may add to body dis-awareness.

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OH MY GOD! You have a beautiful gift...To be one with the fluids---so slippery even the hands of gender cannot grasp you. :') *sighs*

I can only have what you possess if I break a mirror everywhere I go. haha

 

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