GeekyGamerZack Posted December 5, 2018 Share Posted December 5, 2018 3 hours ago, Slice of Ace said: It's called hyperbole 😂 lol, fair enough. It's probably the same as the stereotype that all Aussies eat barbequed prawns, or the one that suggests everyone who plays D&D is either a nerd, a geek or Vin Diesel. 🤣 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Slice of Ace Posted December 5, 2018 Share Posted December 5, 2018 9 hours ago, GeekyGamerZack said: lol, fair enough. It's probably the same as the stereotype that all Aussies eat barbequed prawns, or the one that suggests everyone who plays D&D is either a nerd, a geek or Vin Diesel. 🤣 You wouldn't believe the horror on some people's faces when I tell them I don't like tea, so I understand completely! 😂 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 5, 2018 Share Posted December 5, 2018 1 hour ago, Slice of Ace said: You wouldn't believe the horror on some people's faces when I tell them I don't like tea, so I understand completely! 😂 Pretty sure other people would react the same way when I tell them that I can't stand beer. 🤣 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Loner4ever Posted December 8, 2018 Share Posted December 8, 2018 I think that homo-aesthetic does suit me very well. Not certain about romantic aspects, since the "people" I like to look at, usually never exist anywhere. Kakashi is not a real person, so...as Archie Andrews from the comics, or those Weasley twins are not...the actors are, but they are not Weasleys. So I think it must be close to fictophile imaginary hypothesis-romantic, if it were. I saw 2 or 3 real dudes in life, I could have thought, oh how cool. They were defined sportsy, surfy, skateboarder in-shape, somewhere twink-twen-ish and what one would call the hetero-look or straight acting types. Dunno about their personality, since I usually saw them, and then they were gone or kissing their wife and stuff and I really never saw them again. So it's catch-a-glimpse-aesthetic interest at the best. Well, and they all were kind of ginger-strawberry or white-blond, rather long hair sticking out under their Bb-Caps and bandanas, rather pale skin tone and lots of freckles. As I really like freckles, always have. So if the Weasley-Twins were Surfer dudes and very, very intelligent, sweet of manners, yet cool like Robin Hood hybrid with Mister Spock hybrid with some SWAT-Sniper guy, Kakashi-Ninja traits and "Rocket" from Guardians of the galaxy type of demeanor, Saber the pirate and a bit of Daryl Dixon from TWD, you see, and maybe Robbie Naish, Kevin Pearce...cute owners of boards ... I would want to meet the dude. And I would be too ashamed to ever dare. But I think I better quit silly mind-stirring, everyone already must be laughing up the heaps. Cosplay, if I had the sixpack shape for it, "Sully" from Wes Ball's RUIN-project. ( The Maze runner director, that is) That dude's so kewl and he's wearing motorcycle leathers. 🤣 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TheEngineer Posted December 10, 2018 Share Posted December 10, 2018 What’s up everyone, I’m new to AVEN. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Slice of Ace Posted December 10, 2018 Share Posted December 10, 2018 On 12/8/2018 at 6:47 PM, Loner4ever said: I think that homo-aesthetic does suit me very well. Awesome that you've figured it out 👍 56 minutes ago, TheEngineer said: What’s up everyone, I’m new to AVEN. Hello, and welcome! 🍰 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 10, 2018 Share Posted December 10, 2018 6 hours ago, TheEngineer said: What’s up everyone, I’m new to AVEN. Welcome! Have some 🍰. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Loner4ever Posted December 12, 2018 Share Posted December 12, 2018 On 12/10/2018 at 6:57 PM, Slice of Ace said: Awesome that you've figured it out 👍 Somehow ... but it's horrific complicated and sort of pointless, eh. Welcome to TheEngineer! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Slice of Ace Posted December 12, 2018 Share Posted December 12, 2018 5 hours ago, Loner4ever said: Somehow ... but it's horrific complicated and sort of pointless, eh. However convoluted it may be, if it makes you feel better to know it, great! If not, and you don't mind what you're 'label' is, then you've got nothing to worry about in the first place 😊 It's a win-win! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 12, 2018 Share Posted December 12, 2018 19 minutes ago, Slice of Ace said: However convoluted it may be, if it makes you feel better to know it, great! If not, and you don't mind what you're 'label' is, then you've got nothing to worry about in the first place 😊 It's a win-win! This x infinity. ☺️ 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 After watching @Slice of Ace's videos, I'm starting to get a clearer idea of my orientation. I'm still definitely homoromantic, but I think I'm kind of in a greyish area. I like the idea of being in a relationship, and I'm definitely attracted to other guys in terms of both appearance and personality, but some of the physical stuff kind of unnerves me. To give you an idea, here's a brief rundown: PROS ▪Hand-holding ▪Cuddling ▪Seeing other guys' bare chests CONS ▪Kissing (especially on the mouth) ▪Seeing other guys' genitals ▪Sexual intercourse NOT SURE ▪Sleeping in the same bed ▪Fetish-based play and/or roleplay (without the sexual component) As you can see, I'm not sure if I'm 100% homoromantic, but I'm at least somewhat so. I could label myself as semi-homoromantic, quasi-homoromantic or whatever you call it, but I'm some kind of homoromantic regardless. As for my other labels, I'm definitely homoaesthetic and asexual, and I choose to call myself a gay ace for short. How about you? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Xrott Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 I believe homoromantic only means that you want to be in a relationship with the same gender. What form that relationship takes and how "physical" it is, is completely irrelevant to the term. Personally, when it comes to my orientation I believe in the KISS principle, so "homoromantic asexual" is fine. I can always go into more detail if necessary. If you ask me, saying "gay ace", though, is a bit misleading and makes it needlessly more confusing as "gay" heavily implies sexual attraction to the same sex and thus contradicts the "asexual" part. Calling it by name is also a good way to educate people about romantic orientations and makes them aware that such a thing even exists. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tja Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 (edited) Must be a matter of perception. I feel, being homoromantic, that using "gay ace" is not misleading. It means having a same sex attraction, or, sensual attraction, while not being interested in sex. But, then, I am familiar with asexuality, and not trying to figure it out, as most non-asexuals are. It may be clearer to start with the "ace", as asexuality is the main part of the orientation. Ace gay means I'm asexual, with a romantic attraction to my same sex. I think the main problem is that the word "sex" is perceived to be synonymous with "gay". Too many connotations with "sex", and, usually, when a person hears this word, they immediately think of the act. Edited December 23, 2018 by Tja 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Xrott Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 Again, Keep It Simple. Why muddy the water and abuse a well established word with strong connotations when there is a perfect valid term that is way more descriptive and accurate? I know it might be shorter, but chances are, you'll have to explain yourself anyways. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Muledeer Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 56 minutes ago, Tja said: I think the main problem is that the word "sex" is perceived to be synonymous with "gay". Too many connotations with "sex", and, usually, when a person hears this word, they immediately think of the act. That is how I see it. Gay=the sexual act coupled with the romantic attraction. I wish there was a better way to express asexual same sex attraction. I could have an intimate relationship with someone from either gender, but that intimacy ends with unnecessary physical contact. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Slice of Ace Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 I'd tell someone that I'm gay, because it succinctly explains that I like guys. Yes, they may assume that I'm sexual, but I don't think it's any of their business what I do (or don't do 😂) in the bedroom If I were to expand on that, I would clarify that I am a homoromantic asexual, explaining that if necessary. But I try to avoid that because explaining things all the time is a pain (says the guy who goes out of his way to explain things on the internet 😝). Gay ace I probably wouldn't say to a non-ace, because then I'd have to explain what ace is short for anyway 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 3 hours ago, Slice of Ace said: I'd tell someone that I'm gay, because it succinctly explains that I like guys. Yes, they may assume that I'm sexual, but I don't think it's any of their business what I do (or don't do 😂) in the bedroom My thoughts exactly. 3 hours ago, Slice of Ace said: If I were to expand on that, I would clarify that I am a homoromantic asexual, explaining that if necessary. But I try to avoid that because explaining things all the time is a pain (says the guy who goes out of his way to explain things on the internet 😝). Gay ace I probably wouldn't say to a non-ace, because then I'd have to explain what ace is short for anyway I know what you mean... 😣 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 Oh yeah, I did a remaster of my series' "OVA", and it implies that the protagonist has a mutual crush on one of the other characters, something which was absent in the original version (I was still figuring out my orientation at the time). It also does a partial overhaul of the plot, with one character effectively changing the course of the story through one simple decision. Pretty sure only peeps who've read the original will get the joke, as well as the differences, role replacements and signature "fourth-wall demolitions" that end up occurring as a result. 😁 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tja Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 14 hours ago, Xrott said: Again, Keep It Simple. That's why I say Asexual, and leave it at that. If pressed, I add, "Don't like sex...never will." 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tja Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 14 hours ago, Muledeer said: but that intimacy ends with unnecessary physical contact. Is that any kind of physical contact? Holding hands, a hug, cuddling to watch a movie? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 2 hours ago, Tja said: Is that any kind of physical contact? Holding hands, a hug, cuddling to watch a movie? That's pretty much the extent of my tolerated physical contact. Anything that doesn't involve trading bodily fluids is fair game. The only trades I want to do are in the Pokémon games. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tja Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 2 hours ago, GeekyGamerZack said: Anything that doesn't involve trading bodily fluids is fair game. That's how I am, but, I do/did enjoy kissing. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Muledeer Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 5 hours ago, Tja said: Is that any kind of physical contact? Holding hands, a hug, cuddling to watch a movie? Hugs are fine. Handshakes are fine. Massages , if needed in a place that is not easy to reach, can soothe a backache. The other thing where physical contact is appropriate is for evaluation of a problem in a place on the body that is not easy to see or access. Kissing, cuddling, holding hands, sleeping in the same bed - all of those things I associate with "romantic" behavior - they turn my stomach. Did I mention I believe I am aromantic? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Muledeer Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 2 hours ago, GeekyGamerZack said: That's pretty much the extent of my tolerated physical contact. Anything that doesn't involve trading bodily fluids is fair game. The only trades I want to do are in the Pokémon games. I find it confusing that you identify as gay. It seems like tow things that cannot reasonably coexist. Being gay=sexually attracted to other men. Being asexual=the lack of sexual attraction. I'm still working through this myself. I find myself attracted to men more than women, but without the hope of a sexual or romantic connection. Sometimes I watch gay porn. But I don't label myself as gay because I find anal intercourse to be repulsive, although oral contact I do find to be entertaining in some porn clips. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Slice of Ace Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 7 minutes ago, Muledeer said: I find it confusing that you identify as gay. It seems like tow things that cannot reasonably coexist. Being gay=sexually attracted to other men. Being asexual=the lack of sexual attraction. I'm still working through this myself. I find myself attracted to men more than women, but without the hope of a sexual or romantic connection. Sometimes I watch gay porn. But I don't label myself as gay because I find anal intercourse to be repulsive, although oral contact I do find to be entertaining in some porn clips. For me, "gay" is an umbrella term for any guy who wants a relationship with another guy. Whether that relationship is romantic, sexual, or anything else, if they want a relationship exclusively with guys, they're gay enough for me. Obviously, I wouldn't say I'm homosexual, because that would equate to sexual attraction, which I don't experience as an asexual. I think it would be unnecessarily confusing if I were in a relationship with a guy but told people that I'm not gay (unless I were bi, but I'm not 😂). At the end of the day, what you consider yourself is your own choice. They're all just words used to succintly identify with a common experience 😊 (Not that the question was addressed at me; hope you don't mind 😝) 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 4 minutes ago, Slice of Ace said: For me, "gay" is an umbrella term for any guy who wants a relationship with another guy. Whether that relationship is romantic, sexual, or anything else, if they want a relationship exclusively with guys, they're gay enough for me. Obviously, I wouldn't say I'm homosexual, because that would equate to sexual attraction, which I don't experience as an asexual. This pretty much sums up my thoughts. Before @Slice of Ace introduced the idea of that concept to me, I couldn't label myself as gay because I'm not sexually attracted to guys. Besides, it's easier to call myself a gay ace than invent some new word for "homoromantic asexual". I mean, if I told someone that I'm, say, a cashew as a way to shorten that label without anyone knowing the context, they'd think I'm nuts (which is ironic both in terms of the word I chose AND my gender preference minus the desire to even LOOK at another guy's...well, you get the point 😅). 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Slice of Ace Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 We could meld gay ace together to make gayce 😎 But then it's probably just easier to stick with the established version 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Muledeer Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 @Slice of Ace Thanks for sharing that perspective with us. I have always thought that gay=homosexual. I like hearing different outlooks on things. I would still not identify as gay, however, I have discussed this issue with a gay friend of mine and he has a similar definition of the word "gay" as you do. That conversation took place over ten years ago, before I even know that asexuality was a thing. It just seems too difficult to explain "gay asexual" to someone , so for now, I'll just keep it to myself. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GeekyGamerZack Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 4 hours ago, Slice of Ace said: We could meld gay ace together to make gayce 😎 What a coinkidink. I had that exact same thought just hours ago! 😁 4 hours ago, Slice of Ace said: But then it's probably just easier to stick with the established version I reached the same conclusion pretty much straight away. We could always soften the G in gayce so it makes a J sound...but that'd be opening a whole other can of blue-aligned worms! 😅 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tja Posted December 24, 2018 Share Posted December 24, 2018 Gay is not just a sexual attraction. Automatically saying "gay=sexual attraction" is inaccurate. How about, "gay=sensual attraction"? Gay=sex is just a stereotype. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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