Guest Posted October 22, 2017 Share Posted October 22, 2017 @float on I know... i know... Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 22, 2017 Author Share Posted October 22, 2017 someone online randomly called me ugly for literally no reason whatsoever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 22, 2017 Share Posted October 22, 2017 I'm ugly ._. Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 22, 2017 Author Share Posted October 22, 2017 me too Link to post Share on other sites
Was here Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 I honestly don't know what i consider myself internally. All I know is i want a male body. Link to post Share on other sites
SamwiseLovesLife Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 10 hours ago, float on said: someone online randomly called me ugly for literally no reason whatsoever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ rude Link to post Share on other sites
Kimmie. Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 12 hours ago, Phoenix the II said: I'm ugly ._. 12 hours ago, float on said: me too I have seen pics of you both and i would not say that about any of you. Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 23 minutes ago, Dan99 said: I'm too afraid of what other people think of whatever I do. me too Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 7 minutes ago, Kimmie. said: I have seen pics of you both and i would not say that about any of you. thanks <3 you too Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 spoiler for negativity topic last half-day I've been wrought with thoughts of how miserable this life is. It feels not-worth-it, the prospect of trying to pass as a woman. I would need facial surgery I'm sure of it. so much needs to happen for me to be a woman that it's literally easier to just give up on that and stop trying to be privileged. own up to the greater imperative of living independent... Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 right now, I actually oddly have returned to genderless in identity lol. but, in processing this, I came to realize - that it doesn't change my preferences, likes, the things I am drawn to, my personality, my behavior. many of those things are contributing reasons for why I ID as feminine. so even tho I am currently genderless lol, I am still a woman I'm also still a man for other silly reasons but w/e Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 Fuck this dysphoria, it has an on switch, but it just stays on once it gets flipped. Link to post Share on other sites
Was here Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 just something that occurred to me; if i ever actually do something about this gender problem, should i identify myself as male or trans? like "male" vs "ftm". i mean in the context of putting your gender on a website or something by the way. maybe irl, i don't know. I'm sorry, I look really fake for not considering myself a guy all ready. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 27 minutes ago, Dan99 said: just something that occurred to me; if i ever actually do something about this gender problem, should i identify myself as male or trans? like "male" vs "ftm". i mean in the context of putting your gender on a website or something by the way. maybe irl, i don't know. I'm sorry, I look really fake for not considering myself a guy all ready. It's really up to you. In cases where I would be worried about putting my gender as "Trans" or if it's not an option, I go with "Male". On places where I don't want to open up as trans or don't want to deal with bullshit, I just say I'm male. Don't worry about feeling "fake". In the end there is no RIGHT way to be a guy and your choices/thoughts don't make you any less valid. Link to post Share on other sites
Was here Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 Just now, Nai, but spooky said: It's really up to you. In cases where I would be worried about putting my gender as "Trans" or if it's not an option, I go with "Male". On places where I don't want to open up as trans or don't want to deal with bullshit, I just say I'm male. Don't worry about feeling "fake". In the end there is no RIGHT way to be a guy and your choices/thoughts don't make you any less valid. yeah. constant doubt just goes through my head every day. i don't "feel" male. like, nothing about me is male other than wanting a different body. i don't see guys and think,"that's what i am", i just think,"i want a body like that". unless that's literally all gender is, i don't know. Link to post Share on other sites
kaysir Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 13 hours ago, Kimmie. said: I have seen pics of you both and i would not say that about any of you. Ah!!! I'm jealous!!!!!!! I want to see!!!!!!! I mean, I'm not going to yell until I get to, but I sure would feel so luckyyy~ @Phoenix the II @float on Link to post Share on other sites
Was here Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 since i said hat thing, now I'm worried about what people would think of it. I wouldn't want "trans guy" to be an identity but more as an adjective. I wouldn't want it to be taken the wrong way. Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 26, 2017 Author Share Posted October 26, 2017 Tfw you are running and for the first time in your life feel your boobs bouncing lmao wtf. never thought this would be a part of my life it sorta a little hurt lol but not much xD I'm still all tiny Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 27, 2017 Share Posted October 27, 2017 tfw ^ jealousy Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 27, 2017 Author Share Posted October 27, 2017 tmi / body I can't wait for surgery omg. not that I have anything scheduled tho ;_; I just want it so bad already. I wish it could be tomorrow. I wish I could just pull it off and throw it away... Link to post Share on other sites
Emery. Posted October 27, 2017 Share Posted October 27, 2017 On 23.10.2017 at 2:01 AM, Dan99 said: I honestly don't know what i consider myself internally. All I know is i want a male body. Totally valid. Link to post Share on other sites
Emery. Posted October 27, 2017 Share Posted October 27, 2017 Ugh. I really hope I could get rid of my gender problems. I hope I can come out in the college and dress like a dude whenever I want. But really, for some reason it all started feeling lighter once I'm more able to put a hand on it. It seems like less and less of a problem or something unusual or odd to me. It seems more like a couple of hobbies, clothing preferences and... just speaking my mind on who I am, which becomes less shameful for me, gradually. Link to post Share on other sites
The-world-is-quiet-here Posted October 28, 2017 Share Posted October 28, 2017 One of my friends and I send each other selfies and compliment each other a lot. It’s nice. I’ve been binding lately, and she’s noticed. I haven’t been checking in with myself about gender. I guess I’ve felt masculine-ish? but not like, *male*. Anyways, this friend of mine has seen my selfies and says things like “what a handsome young man!” to me, and I can’t tell how it feels? Like, it feels like it feels good and bad. I feel very mixed about it. And I don’t know how to explain it to her. Maybe something like, “I feel masculine today but not like a man”? I don’t know. Link to post Share on other sites
Emery. Posted October 28, 2017 Share Posted October 28, 2017 Isn't it wierd? I feel male, but not that masculine... Actually quite androgynous. I mean, whatever. I escape any conventional understanding of gender, I just don't feel like I reassemble females too much. I think and feel like men do and feel like the roles men traditionally fulfilled in society are for me. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 28, 2017 Share Posted October 28, 2017 It would make me sad ... why anyone would cut hair short from having long hair. why anyone would get a breast reduction. I know why now... it was me putting my feelings on someone else :| Link to post Share on other sites
Kimmie. Posted October 29, 2017 Share Posted October 29, 2017 On 2017-10-27 at 9:50 PM, float on said: tmi / body Reveal hidden contents I can't wait for surgery omg. not that I have anything scheduled tho ;_; I just want it so bad already. I wish it could be tomorrow. I wish I could just pull it off and throw it away... I am with you there. The pull it off and through it away part. Link to post Share on other sites
Emery. Posted October 29, 2017 Share Posted October 29, 2017 I sometimes get the urge to just shave my head Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 29, 2017 Share Posted October 29, 2017 1 hour ago, Emery. said: I sometimes get the urge to just shave my head Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted October 30, 2017 Author Share Posted October 30, 2017 y'know, me too. stupid hair. Link to post Share on other sites
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