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Well I'm not sure what to say... I do think you're overthinking it but then again I also overthought things at one point and it can be good to think about this stuff from every possible angle. Just not all the time, and not forever. 

I think at some point either you'll just get tired and stop caring so much about what is or isn't and just "be" instead of "think", or you'll actively try to get out of just the theoritical stage and actually experiment with things in the real world. Either way you'll probably move past this extreme doubting and questioning at some point, so hang in there. 

But also, I would say that not "feeling" like a man doesn't necessarily mean anything, however how you would feel in situations where people genuinely believed you to be male and treated you as such could be very telling. 

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i feel delusional for typing this stuff now, like what if it's just OCD or my low self esteem or something? what if i'm just making myself think i'm trans when i'm not, or just trying to be different? just because i like the idea of being male doesn't mean i am. none of it really matters anyway since i never plan on transitioning socially or physically or anything.

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I don't want to focus on your gender identity for reasons I will explain; I just want to ask you if you are currently in therapy or at least have a plan how to manage your OCD? 

Because if this gender questioning is a result of your OCD then you need to get treated for it. It isn't healthy for you, it is extremely exhausting both for you and others and it literally gets you nowhere. For this reasons, I don't want to comment on your gender identity because I think that every comment that could potentially help you has already been made. It is up to you to decide what to do with it.

I don't say this because I think you shouldn't be questioning, or shouldn't be asking questions. But the kind of posts you write sound very much like the posts themselves make you feel bad and I think that you should work on that. 

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Oh c'mon, why do you think it's OCD?

 

I don't want to be rude, but nothing wrong about packing. Believe me.

 

Also. I don't want to press anything, but you sound quite trans. I mean, I don't personally relate, but you do sound dysphoric. It's like... you're spinning in those pointless circles, and, I also was, there is an underlying feeling of discomfort that drives you to do this. This is the reason. But you struggle to find those feelings an outlet.

 

How do you feel if I said you're a guy? I guess good from what you wrote about role-playing. And how about engaging in more role-playing? Online? Games? Cosplay? If that makes you happy? Would that be satisfactory for you?

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i thought it could've been ocd because i've always had problems overthinking everything and having thoughts come out of nowhere. I'm probably gonna stop posting about it though, it's exhausting and i need to stop freaking out about it.

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Well, my take is that... look. I know someone with OCD. It's not how it looks like. It's just not. And quite honestly, if you had OCD, I wouldn't care. I would respect your thoughts. Because they might be obsessive, but they need respect like everything else. I know someone who is obsessed with hygene. I just... approach it with understanding. If certain things make her comfortable, I'll go with that. I also understand where she is coming from, even though I disagree about it. I'll sit and reassure her that everything is alright.

 

It looks more like you're perfectly normal (people with OCD are normal, just very anxious) without any mental disorder, but beating yourself up for having feelings. It's completely normal that certain thoughts come back to you. THis is how memory and remebering things works. You need to let out the freaking out. It's not going away if you don't. Escapimg your feelings won't make them disappear. You're alright. That you don't fit a box, or a stereotype, or want to be sure, or are anxious about what this all means I just can tell you that this is alright, a lot of people don't neatly fit boxes, it's completely natural, this world is full of snowflakes, and every snowflake is different, and to be anxious means, to be, being perfectly sane. Everyone sane would be anxious about that. The point is to not let the fear paralyse you. *huge hug* You're brave. You have the courage to look into this. Not everyone does. This is feelings. Just repressing them will only make you feel stressed out and exhaust you.

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