teatree Posted September 29, 2017 Share Posted September 29, 2017 Looks like it was originally posted in 2006, so that was a long time ago (in Internet terms!).... 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Decaf Posted September 29, 2017 Share Posted September 29, 2017 35 minutes ago, teatree said: Looks like it was originally posted in 2006, so that was a long time ago (in Internet terms!).... Thanks, teatree. Apologies for not being more observant. In 2006, I was still in my 40s *sigh* 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
teatree Posted September 29, 2017 Share Posted September 29, 2017 3 hours ago, Decaf said: In 2006, I was still in my 40s *sigh* Me too! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Decaf Posted September 29, 2017 Share Posted September 29, 2017 :-) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
will123 Posted September 29, 2017 Share Posted September 29, 2017 9 hours ago, Decaf said: In 2006, I was still in my 40s *sigh* Times three and had just figured out my situation. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Decaf Posted September 29, 2017 Share Posted September 29, 2017 15 minutes ago, will123 said: Times three and had just figured out my situation. You were 120? ;-) 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 27 minutes ago, Decaf said: You were 120? ;-) So that's where his user name comes from! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
will123 Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 2 minutes ago, daveb said: So that's where his user name comes from! LOL! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Decaf Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 Lol x 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 In 2006 I was just leaving my 40s (turned 50 that year), and had no clue about asexuality or where I fit. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Decaf Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 I first heard the word in 1979 or 80, but there wasn't a community or the internet etc, so there was no way to take that information any further. In the early 2000s, someone set up an ace Yahoo group and that's when I began actually identifying as ace because I realised I wasn't alone. I would have been 39 or 40 at that time. I'm 56 now. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
will123 Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 12 hours ago, daveb said: In 2006 I was just leaving my 40s (turned 50 that year), and had no clue about asexuality or where I fit. I know what you mean. "I don't want to have sex with a female and not interested in guys. What is wrong with me?" It wasn't a consuming thought, but it was in the back of my mind when someone would make a suggestion to me about so and so being available, or I know a friend/co-worker/cousin that is single. I generally didn't pursue the matter (the situation with the girl named Suzanne was the one time I did) because I was pretty sure the other person would have a different idea of where the pairing should go. As far as I was concerned I just felt that I wanted a female 'friend', like a male buddy. Do things together, but not involve sex or romance. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 I didn't even know I didn't want sex. I thought I just needed to get much closer to someone emotionally first. And even then I thought I just didn't know how to do it right or that there was something wrong with me. I don't remember how I came across AVEN (something to do with wikipedia or google or some other random web wanderings post-relationship). And that's when it finally clicked. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Decaf Posted September 30, 2017 Share Posted September 30, 2017 The way I describe my asexuality is to say that the way straight men feel about men, and straight women feel about women....that's how I feel about everyone. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
will123 Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 On 9/30/2017 at 0:10 PM, daveb said: I didn't even know I didn't want sex. I thought I just needed to get much closer to someone emotionally first. And even then I thought I just didn't know how to do it right or that there was something wrong with me. I don't remember how I came across AVEN (something to do with wikipedia or google or some other random web wanderings post-relationship). And that's when it finally clicked. That kind of becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy doesn't it? I thought of that too at times. "Why bother because with no experience I'll just screw it up". 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Daniela Posted November 3, 2017 Share Posted November 3, 2017 I call myself asexual since I am 16 but only now I found out this is an 'official' sexual orientation. What a relief to know this as my whole life I considered myself as someone abmormal. I am in doubt however if I could be a 'semi sexual' although I am still not very familiar with these terms. Btw I am 46 year old woman ☺ 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 4 hours ago, Daniela said: I call myself asexual since I am 16 Welcome and ! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Daniela Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 On 11/3/2017 at 11:00 PM, daveb said: Welcome and ! Thank you! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Jetsun Milarepa Posted November 21, 2017 Share Posted November 21, 2017 There's been a whole lot of new peeps recently, so welcome! This is good news. In 2006 I was a 46 year old harassed single mum looking after an elderly mum and holding down a three shift rota job. I'd no time to think about sex so it wasn't till things quietened down that I began to see the light of asexuality. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
vogonpoet Posted December 2, 2017 Share Posted December 2, 2017 Hello (again). I've been away for a while. I'm trying to make the time to stay involved. I need some kind of support network, especially during the holidays. I intend to rejoin the DC area meetup group, even though I'm old enough to be everyone's mother (or grandmother). Believe it or not, I was spurred on (pun intended) by BoJack Horseman-- Todd being an ACE, and the depiction of that as "being OK" just BLEW my MIND. I'm sure it's been a major topic of conversation on AVEN. Anyway, good to be back, and though I find the sheer volume of forums, topics and posts to be overwhelming, I'll stick mostly to this one and see how it goes. Cheers, Leigh 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
teatree Posted December 2, 2017 Share Posted December 2, 2017 Hello @vogonpoet and welcome back. I have never heard of Bojack Horseman, so apologies--I just Googled it to find out! Yes, there are sure a lot of forums here, but I tend to stick to just a couple so as to not get overwhelmed. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mocha Jo Posted December 2, 2017 Share Posted December 2, 2017 There is so much here that I don't have time to post on more than one or two. The over 50 thread is about the only one I tend to check in on. But I read a lot. I am amazed that it took me so much of my life to figure out why I can't keep a relationship going no matter how much I want to. I am not usually that dense, LOL. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
will123 Posted December 3, 2017 Share Posted December 3, 2017 10 hours ago, vogonpoet said: Hello (again). I've been away for a while. I'm trying to make the time to stay involved. I need some kind of support network, especially during the holidays. I intend to rejoin the DC area meetup group, even though I'm old enough to be everyone's mother (or grandmother). Believe it or not, I was spurred on (pun intended) by BoJack Horseman-- Todd being an ACE, and the depiction of that as "being OK" just BLEW my MIND. I'm sure it's been a major topic of conversation on AVEN. Anyway, good to be back, and though I find the sheer volume of forums, topics and posts to be overwhelming, I'll stick mostly to this one and see how it goes. Cheers, Leigh That should keep you busy enough. Welcome back 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
not here Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 Hello! Just reintroducing myself to the all the "older asexuals!" LOL I was here for a while some years ago, but life happened... Anyway, I'm 52. I'm pretty sure that classifies me as being "older," although I don't FEEL "older" at all! Whenever I think about being 52, all I can think is, "That can't possibly be! I don't feel THAT old!" Oh, well, I guess it's better than being 52 AND feeling my age! LOL 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 Welcome back ~pixie~ 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
not here Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 17 minutes ago, Sleighcaptain said: Welcome back ~pixie~ Thank you! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 4 hours ago, ~pixie~ said: reintroducing myself Welcome back and 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Jetsun Milarepa Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 welcome back @pixie , the site seems to be edging towards 100,000 now according to what I've heard. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
not here Posted December 7, 2017 Share Posted December 7, 2017 8 hours ago, daveb said: Welcome back and 6 hours ago, chandrakirti said: welcome back @pixie , the site seems to be edging towards 100,000 now according to what I've heard. Thank you! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Glamourgirl1 Posted December 23, 2017 Share Posted December 23, 2017 Hi, I'm Tracy. I'm 55, married with 3 kids and a cat. I've known I was asexual since my 40's (thank you, internet), but I've not told anyone. It would be nice to be able to talk to someone about it, but I don't have any friends and I can't exactly discuss it with my family. I'm sure my husband suspects but we don't discuss it. He actually brought up the topic last week at dinner, mentioning something about asexuality and how he couldn't understand it - I just kept my mouth shut. I think he was giving me an opening, but I didn't bite. He is very sexual. I swear to god he'd have sex every day if I was willing. Needless to say, sex has always been something of an issue between us, but after 35 years of marriage, we've managed to come up with a system that works for us. Aside from the sex, I love being married - I like the companionship, having a family, having someone to share my life with, etc. My husband treats me like a princess and for that I am so grateful. Nevertheless, my sister is divorced and I can't help but look at her life and wonder sometimes what it would be like to be single and not have to have sex. But I'm not good with people and as I mentioned before, I don't have any friends so I'm guessing it would suck ass and I'd be lonely as hell. It's a funny thing, though. I always thought that by this time in my life, sex would be over and done with - or at least a rare occurrence. But no. He is almost 60 and his sex drive has not slowed down one bit. My god, will it ever end? Aren't older men supposed to have issues with impotence? But then again, there's viagra so if that were an issue, I'm sure he'd haul ass to the doctor before I could even start to enjoy the reprieve. So anyway, that's me and my life. I'm glad to have found this forum and look forward to getting to know everyone. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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