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How not to answer a newbie


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No, you cannot. We never think of rude things. So sorry, but your ace license has now been revoked.

 

What should I do about societal pressures to have sex?

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Have sex somewhere in public. How could you prove you've had it otherwise. Unpleasant, yeah, but necessary. We've all been there, believe me!

 

What I don't get is the difference between platonic, romantic and aesthetic attraction. Help please!

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Katarina Gertje

All answers are 100% serious and legit. Without exception.

 

 

How long do I need to have an AVEN account until I'm not a newbie?

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Yup, I like rissouls for dinner 👹

 

Can I bring a friend to AVEN? 

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6 minutes ago, Skycaptain said:

Can I bring a friend to AVEN? 

You're only allowed to bring a friend if they're willing to join our asexual sex parties.

 

Am I still asexual if I masturbate daily to hentai?

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no way, you're definitely japsexual. and that sort of post belongs in a tmi spoiler! 

 

how do I determine my prefix?

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Make a post in the meme thread, you'll get half a dozen different answers in two minutes 

 

Do you have to study classics to form a platonic relationships 

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Quantic Passive Retirement, it's one of the four stages in the life of an asexual being.

Can asexual people give birth with parthenogenesis?

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  • 2 weeks later...

No. It is like having sex with himself and we are allergic to sex.

 

What is demisexuality?

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nothing good obviously, since it starts with "demise"

 

I keep reading about "ace", what does that word stand for?

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50ShadesOfGreyAndPurple

Probably because there is no seating near by, it's the only reason most people stand for.

 

How many aces does it take to *screw* in a lightbulb?

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If they're funny you'll be an ace comic 

 

The local vicar has noticed that I've never been seen with anyone and keeps trying to recruit me as a priest 

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Of course it is the only type we do here! What more do you want? If you do want something else, then you should look somewhere.

 

What is grey-A?

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If a ace is considered a witch and you burn her, the ash is grey. Grey-A is a term for all the innocent people who has died because of some wrong accusations.

 

Is my catholic mother going to kill me if she knows that I'm asexual?

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You should see that coming. Asexuals are mystical creatures who do witchcraft and the catholic religion just would not tolerate that.

Run away as soon as you see this response!

 

What shall I do when people called me a prude after saying that asexuality is just a lie?

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50ShadesOfGreyAndPurple

my solution is not to say the MISTRUTH that asexuality is a lie, and then maybe people won't call you a prude.

But if you are called a prude, my suggestion is to lean into the idea and embrace it, if you can find some prunes take one out and then repetitively touch the prune, you'd be a prune prodding prude, everyone loves a prune prodding prude.

 

when something good happens, such as a new brand of punes to prod, can i say "that's ace" or is it gross misrepresentation?

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stealing this.

 

can one use terms like "ace" publically, or are they copyrighted words? and who do I give credit to if I do use it? is referring to AVEN enough?

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Ace comes from the playing card and their copyright expired since a triple eternity but as it is also the title of fighter pilots with more than 5 kill marks, you are not supposed to use it, simply not to insult them by comparing them with you.

 

who invent all those strange prefixes?

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Katarina Gertje

Aren't we all? Other people are terrifying.

 

 

What does sex repulsed mean?

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DetectiveDayo

It is!! But I still think cooties is a better word.

 

what is the opposite of asexual?

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