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a gender positive thread


butterflydreams

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3 hours ago, Ricchan said:

I sent a picture of myself dressed as the opposite sex (for want of a better phrasing), to my partner yesterday. It's the first time anyone has seen :blush:

Good for you. I hope they will take it with respect.:) And congrats.

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6 hours ago, Ricchan said:

I sent a picture of myself dressed as the opposite sex (for want of a better phrasing), to my partner yesterday. It's the first time anyone has seen :blush:

I wanna see!!! I'm j/k!!! i'll behave now :blush:  Yay!! I'm glad to read you are taking baby steps now, I'm sooo proud of you!!

 

 

 

 

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4 hours ago, Jayce said:

I wanna see!!! I'm j/k!!! i'll behave now :blush:  Yay!! I'm glad to read you are taking baby steps now, I'm sooo proud of you!!

Maybe one day :lol: Thanks guys. Between you all and my partner, then I'm feeling way happier than ever before! :o 

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butterflydreams

finally called the county clerk today to confirm their hours for their passport office. It's been something depression has kept me from doing for over a month now. I didn't say specifically why I was physically going to come in for a passport renewal (renewals can be done by mail), but she seemed really nice and said that whatever I was trying to do, I could come in and they'd get it figured out.

 

I want my passport updated because 1) when I got it 7 years ago, it was a really big accomplishment for me and 2) in order to fill out an I-9 for a job, you need either a passport or two documents showing identity and citizenship. It's easiest to just use a passport, which I wouldn't be able to do right now. So I'm getting this taken care of.

 

What an absolute internal battle just to call and confirm their office hours.

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8 minutes ago, Hadley167 said:

What an absolute internal battle just to call

I feel you on that! Good for you for doing it! And best wishes getting your passport updated when you go there. :) Sounds like they will be helpful.

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Mezzo Forte
14 hours ago, Hadley167 said:

finally called the county clerk today to confirm their hours for their passport office.

Congrats Hadley! I can tell you that it's a huge relief to have your passport sorted out, especially with international travel. :)

 

On a similar note, I just got back from Cuba, and nothing quite tells you that you're passing quite like living in a highly gendered culture for a week and being exclusively treated as male. :P 

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Congrats @Hadley167 that is so awesome of you to be able to do:)

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today was a blouse+earrings+necklace+normal bra kind of day, which has become really exceptional. kids at work complimented me on it and i didn't get dsphoria!

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Planing on buying some nail polish tomorrow and maybe some more makeup:)

It will hopefully better my mood.

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ChillaKilla

I bought a super lovely eyeshadow palette lasts night- totally gonna do a trans pride look when it arrives! Here's what it looks like:



3-5-17_BFM_JUVIASPLACE7507_st.jpg?v=1490

Its the Masquerade palette by Juvia's Place in case anybody is wondering ^_^ 

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31 minutes ago, Kimmie. said:

Planing on buying some nail polish tomorrow and maybe some more makeup:)

It will hopefully better my mood.

Yay! Do you know what colors nailpolish you are going to buy???? Yay on the make up too :)

13 minutes ago, ChillaKilla said:

I bought a super lovely eyeshadow palette lasts night- totally gonna do a trans pride look when it arrives! Here's what it looks like:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 


3-5-17_BFM_JUVIASPLACE7507_st.jpg?v=1490
 

 

 

Its the Masquerade palette by Juvia's Place in case anybody is wondering ^_^ 

Aaaahhh that just looks awesome! Love the color palette too!

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30 minutes ago, Jayce said:

Yay! Do you know what colors nailpolish you are going to buy???? Yay on the make up too :)

No not yet. Either natural whiteish color or maybe light purple. Any suggestions? 

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I don't know if I'm welcome in this thread since I never had dysphoria per se and I'm kind of meh about my own gender. I identify as a female by default and don't put much thought to it otherwise, but there have been moments...

Anyway, I have always loved the fact that I have broad shoulders (and a broad frame in general). My ex-boyfriend was even a little pissed-off that my shoulders were broader than his.:D I don't care about showing off my body usually, but I just love to wear tank-tops or off-the-shoulder tops. Anything that emphasises my shoulders is welcome in my book. And, of course, short hair is the best and makes me very happy, even if my hair is otherwise meh. Also, short hair helps with the shoulder thing. ;)

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4 hours ago, miau said:

welcome

I would say you are welcome. The thread is called "a gender positive thread" and it sounds like you are positive about some gendery things. :)

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15 hours ago, miau said:

I don't know if I'm welcome in this thread since I never had dysphoria per se and I'm kind of meh about my own gender. I identify as a female by default and don't put much thought to it otherwise, but there have been moments...

Anyway, I have always loved the fact that I have broad shoulders (and a broad frame in general). My ex-boyfriend was even a little pissed-off that my shoulders were broader than his.:D I don't care about showing off my body usually, but I just love to wear tank-tops or off-the-shoulder tops. Anything that emphasises my shoulders is welcome in my book. And, of course, short hair is the best and makes me very happy, even if my hair is otherwise meh. Also, short hair helps with the shoulder thing. ;)

You are most welcome here :cake:  :cake:

 

15 hours ago, Kimmie. said:

No not yet. Either natural whiteish color or maybe light purple. Any suggestions? 

I have bias towards golds, silver colors and shades of pinks/purples/reds but you should go with whatever you love! I'm really curious to find out what colors you will buy :D

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1 hour ago, Jayce said:

I have bias towards golds, silver colors and shades of pinks/purples/reds but you should go with whatever you love! I'm really curious to find out what colors you will buy :D

Well this is what I got not the best of quality but it will do. 

Spoiler

DSC_0683.jpg

 

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14 minutes ago, Kimmie. said:

Well this is what I got not the best of quality but it will do. 

  Reveal hidden contents

DSC_0683.jpg

 

Wow nice! Seems like you almost have the same taste as me!

Here is a small impression of my nailpolish collection, I've got more then 45 different colors (I think) 

 

IMG_0208.jpg

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3 minutes ago, Jayce said:

Wow nice! Seems like you almost have the same taste as me!

Here is a small impression of my nailpolish collection, I've got more then 45 different colors (I think) 

 

 

  Reveal hidden contents

IMG_0208.jpg

 

Wow thats a lot. And awesome. 

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And a first try  not that bad. 

Spoiler

DSC_0685.jpg

 

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Mezzo Forte

Spent today buying supplies for my top surgery. I even got some shirts to look forward to wearing once I can lift my arms above my head again!

 

It's kind of tough to think of anything other than top surgery right now with it coming up so soon, but even with the worries, the "what if's," my overly-neurotic worries about preparing for post-op depression, and my attempts to set realistic expectations about my results, I'm starting to get really excited. :) 

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butterflydreams

I probably sound like a broken record, but good luck, @Mezzo Forte. I've been thinking about you a lot this weekend. *hugs*

 

I just got back from a very long weekend of bridesmaid stuff for my friend's wedding. I won't share any of the difficult parts here, but it was interesting to be so accepted and naturally included in the group of women there. Aside from my friend getting married, I'd only ever met one of them prior to my transition. I figured she would, but I asked my friend to not mention anything about it. The one girl who I had met prior to transition was really excited to see me again. She was very interested in how things were going for me, and she said something interesting. She said she was excited to count me as a friend, not because I was trans, but rather because she liked people who have the guts to be their authentic selves. No matter what that might be. I genuinely felt included and like "one of the girls" when I was hanging out with them. 

 

I was split on how difficult dress shopping was going to be. There were all the other girls there, plus the people at the store helping us, PLUS it's an open space with a shit ton of mirrors. I was a little embarrassed at first, because we were picking out things to try and I didn't know my dress size. I know my top size, and what size skirt to buy, but I don't have any fitted dresses. I took a shot on a size 10. It was like an inch away from fitting perfectly. The only other size I could find was a 14, and while it was a bit big in some ares, it fit well in others. So that's what I went with.

 

I liked the style dress I found, I can't remember the name of it. As everybody was commenting on it, someone said, "wow, the slit on the bottom of that goes up really high, are you sure you're comfortable with that?" I didn't notice it at first, but when they pointed it out, I did. It did hit above my knee, but not too much. I'm going to rock it.

 

They had to take our measurements at the end, to make sure the size was right, and any alterations could be made. I was nervous to have someone that close to me. But as it turns out, my measurements weren't really all that different from most of the other girls there. I think I was only 1 inch different from another girl there. My friend was very insistent that we each get the dress that looked best on us. Didn't matter if they were all different styles. They'll all be the same color.

 

After all that, you probably want to see the dress, don't you? The actual one will be in red, but I do like this shade of purple.

Spoiler

fullsizeoutput_71d-e1494792105374.jpeg

 

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@Hadley167 you are so cute! I had a good time reading your post, and that dress is nice! I also like the purple, but my favorite color is red so I'm even more excited for that. Congrats to the bride and to you on being a bridesmaid, I hope it's a fun experience! I don't doubt that the other ladies will show you a good time.

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@Hadley167 wow that looks so great on you:) I would love that dress.And great story to. Yays for being a bridesmaid.

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Toothlesss

@Hadley167 you look amazing in that dress :) 

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Mezzo Forte

Thanks @Hadley167, your thoughts mean a lot to me. :) Everything feels so surreal right now, but I'm so ready for this to happen.

 

I was definitely thinking of you this weekend and hoping you would enjoy your bridesmaid adventures. In all honesty, I have a funny feeling you'll enjoy being a bridesmaid so much more than I did. :lol: That dress looks fantastic on you, and I'm sure it'll look stunning in red!

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also, if I lay my hand really still on my chest and close my eyes and believe it really hard, it feels like I have a flat chest. it worked earlier and it was amazing

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butterflydreams

oh my, you're all so sweet <3 :cake: It's weird, looking at the picture again, I can't believe how long my hair has gotten. :ph34r:

 

4 hours ago, kaysir said:

@Hadley167 you are so cute! I had a good time reading your post, and that dress is nice! I also like the purple, but my favorite color is red so I'm even more excited for that. Congrats to the bride and to you on being a bridesmaid, I hope it's a fun experience! I don't doubt that the other ladies will show you a good time.

Red is my favorite color too. One of the things I noticed was how natural all of this felt for me. I haven't felt that way in a long time. Positions and situations I'd consider myself vulnerable in didn't bother me much at all, and I felt relaxed. Like when 5 of us piled into a small car. We were even talking about the bachelorette party and I feel really excited about it. I've always shied away from group things like this in the past (when it was with other guys) because it was too hard to keep the shields up in those vulnerable situations. My friend was so happy that I seemed to instantly start bonding with one of the other bridesmaids. I was surprised how naturally it came to me.

 

That's not to say (to others out there early in their journeys) that all of this is instant, even if it is right for you. I think it does take some time to "grow into" your new body, and your "new" self. Even my doctor described it that way last week. Saying it was very obvious I was really growing into my woman's body. Because about this time last year, I visited this same friend, and two of the same girls from this weekend. It was my first big trip from home as myself. It was really hard. I was super nervous the whole time. I thought I was shy, awkward and everything, but it turned out that the other girls really did like me, and were sad that I had gone to bed before they could say goodbye for the night. But I couldn't see it myself. So I think it takes time to grow into that. Just an observation.

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