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a gender positive thread


butterflydreams

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DuranDuranfan
17 hours ago, nerdperson777 said:

My roommate says that they get mistaken for a guy often.  Maybe just because I know them enough, I don't actually get how that happens.  Their voice isn't very low and there are D cups right there.  Somehow with all the black clothing and short hair, they sometimes get hostile women chasing them out of the bathroom.  Usually I thought when people had big enough boobs, it would be hard to miss, and yet they missed.

Ugh, that’s like me except even when presenting masculine I get called ma’am. If you’re gonna use female pronouns anything but that please. Must be my voice. But I don’t get how they’d not see your roommates obvious boobs when they’re that size.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I got my ears re-pierced today! 🎉

I let them go during the years of dysphoria, but after some months on T I was ready to reclaim something I had missed. :)

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TheAceCoffeebean

I adore this thread - it's so positive and happy!

I think I like my voice because its easy to manipulate for my gender expression day-to-day, my ability to pull all-nighters and still function for classes the next day, and I like my body art that I design. 😊

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Celyn: The Lutening

I love spending time with my transfemme friends because their appreciation for their boobs makes me feel way less dysphoric about having them myself.

TIDDY POSITIVITY (doesn't last but it's welcome relief)

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When I dress up I see the base of the real me. Just make all those curves real l (breasts hips,butt, waist. And probably the thing down there . I want to be able to wear a bikini one day) Lose some belly fat. And teach myself how to do makeup. And I would be so much happier.

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Janus the Fox
22 hours ago, Kimmie. said:

When I dress up I see the base of the real me. Just make all those curves real l (breasts hips,butt, waist. And probably the thing down there . I want to be able to wear a bikini one day) Lose some belly fat. And teach myself how to do makeup. And I would be so much happier.

Sooo very much the same.  I had to do a lot just to get to where I am now based on advice with lifestyle change.  Contrary to my above pics, I was 17 stone once and not all that particularly well health wise.  I had to do a lot of change, stopping junk food, unnecessary snacks, regular exercise, no fizzy drinks or alcohol, healthy meals and logging it all for doctors to come to a determination through routine health checks.  9-10 stone heavy for a bio male.

 

It is an investment that pays off and very important to the transition to me.  I think without taking steps, I would be denied medical transition because I’m that seriously unhealthy and maybe ineffective when coming to that medical transition.  In the end, I’m already able to fit into and look good in women’s clothes like “ohh hey why does this fit so naturally well already”. I don’t do makeup though, sensitive skin and preference for the natural look.

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My friend is so cool and accepting~ I'm lucky to know them. 

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I actually love the amount of positivity in this topic. *squeals for no f*cking reason*

I like that my shoulders are broad, and that my leg hair grows out fast. I also think my eyes are cool. They're kind of hazel, but more dramatic with less of a transition between golden brown (around my pupil) and light green (around the edge of my iris).

I also like that I found a bra that is just tight enough that allows me to safely bind. :) 

I'm in a pretty good mood after this. #topdysphoriacanttouchthis 😂

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On 12/4/2019 at 5:48 AM, nerdperson777 said:

My roommate says that they get mistaken for a guy often.  Maybe just because I know them enough, I don't actually get how that happens.  Their voice isn't very low and there are D cups right there.  Somehow with all the black clothing and short hair, they sometimes get hostile women chasing them out of the bathroom.  Usually I thought when people had big enough boobs, it would be hard to miss, and yet they missed.

Honestly I think a lot of people might just not look at the chest enough to notice. Or even if they do look eventually, if they've already seen something else that gave them the impression they were looking at a guy then they'll stick with that first impression. 

I think if you have a neutral enough face then clothes and hair are the biggest things that people will automatically use to determine your gender in their mind. There's been times that I've gone out without binding, and my chest isn't as big as your roommate's but it's still big enough to be clearly noticeable if I leave my hoodie unzipped, which I did sometimes, and I still passed perfectly fine. But back when I wore the same kind of clothes but my hair was longer, I'd pass only about half the time. And before then when I still didn't know I was trans so I wasn't trying to pass as male but I also had a very neutral style and vibe I passed once in a while but then the person would do a double take and change their mind 😕

So yeah I think the clothes and haircut and probably also the way your roommate carries themselves are what contributes to them passing, and stuff like the chest just goes ignored because people focus more on the former aspects. If they don't have a particularly feminine face and maybe also aren't skinny, and they have short hair and neutral or masculine clothes then yeah I totally get it, despite the chest. People mostly just decide based on the face, hair and clothes.

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I got masculine earrings for Christmas! At first I was disappointed, but on second thought, they're pretty 'masculine' judging from the male earring wearers I've seen ^^

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1 hour ago, NoelciMeta said:

I got masculine earrings for Christmas! At first I was disappointed, but on second thought, they're pretty 'masculine' judging from the male earring wearers I've seen ^^

Do you have or can you post pics? I'm curious what constitutes masculine earrings. In guy mode I almost always wear small stud earrings, but have also worn small hoops (like maybe a centimeter in diameter?). I'd say dangly earrings are usually not perceived as masculine, but maybe there are other types that are.

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30 minutes ago, daveb said:

Do you have or can you post pics? I'm curious what constitutes masculine earrings. In guy mode I almost always wear small stud earrings, but have also worn small hoops (like maybe a centimeter in diameter?). I'd say dangly earrings are usually not perceived as masculine, but maybe there are other types that are.

They're just plain black square stones~

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I can't stop being grateful for my friend. Yesterday my brother made some kind of (humorous) comment involving me being a girl, and they went like ''Yeah, totally!, biologically. that's right ;D'' 

I'm not even out to him... gosh I'm so lucky :') 

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nerdperson777
On 12/27/2019 at 4:48 AM, Starbogen said:

Honestly I think a lot of people might just not look at the chest enough to notice. Or even if they do look eventually, if they've already seen something else that gave them the impression they were looking at a guy then they'll stick with that first impression. 

I think if you have a neutral enough face then clothes and hair are the biggest things that people will automatically use to determine your gender in their mind. There's been times that I've gone out without binding, and my chest isn't as big as your roommate's but it's still big enough to be clearly noticeable if I leave my hoodie unzipped, which I did sometimes, and I still passed perfectly fine. But back when I wore the same kind of clothes but my hair was longer, I'd pass only about half the time. And before then when I still didn't know I was trans so I wasn't trying to pass as male but I also had a very neutral style and vibe I passed once in a while but then the person would do a double take and change their mind 😕

So yeah I think the clothes and haircut and probably also the way your roommate carries themselves are what contributes to them passing, and stuff like the chest just goes ignored because people focus more on the former aspects. If they don't have a particularly feminine face and maybe also aren't skinny, and they have short hair and neutral or masculine clothes then yeah I totally get it, despite the chest. People mostly just decide based on the face, hair and clothes.

I guess what contributes to passing is short hair, tall for AFAB, extra hairy for AFAB standards, and almost all black clothing.  They claim a butch identity, but idk what they wear that is a stereotypical butch look.

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My good friend from high school told me a few days ago that they think they're transfeminine/genderfluid.  I'm really happy that they're figuring things out!

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Now that I'm gaining some weight back my waist looks fuller and my body actually looks less curvy than when I was underweight.. So even if I'm technically getting some weight in areas I don't want it I can't actually complain much about my default weight distribution because it looks decently noncurvy, especially for an afab body, when I'm at a healthier weight. I've noticed that when I lose weight I lose it more noticeably in my torso than my lower body, but when I gain weight I also gain it more noticeably around my waist than around my hips so that's great. So yeah, hate my hips' unfortunate bone structure but my waist kinda makes up for it, and with T and exercise for my shoulders I should be pretty fine when it comes to body shape.  

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This thread is always a pleasure to get back to.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Thread has been a bit quiet for a while so I thought I'd leave this here (from a photo shoot I did last Friday)

Spoiler

DSC02919.jpg

 

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1 hour ago, daveb said:

Thread has been a bit quiet for a while so I thought I'd leave this here (from a photo shoot I did last Friday)

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DSC02919.jpg

 

You look great!

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2 hours ago, daveb said:

Thread has been a bit quiet for a while so I thought I'd leave this here (from a photo shoot I did last Friday)...

1 hour ago, Starbogen said:

You look great!

 

Oh, wow! I agree; that's a nice photo.

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6 hours ago, daveb said:

Thread has been a bit quiet for a while so I thought I'd leave this here (from a photo shoot I did last Friday)

  Reveal hidden contents

DSC02919.jpg

 

You are so beautiful.

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Lonemathsytoothbrushthief
15 hours ago, daveb said:

Thread has been a bit quiet for a while so I thought I'd leave this here (from a photo shoot I did last Friday)

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DSC02919.jpg

 

You look stunning! ^_^ Hope life's treating you well!

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Thanks for the kind compliments everyone.

 

42 minutes ago, Lonemathsytoothbrushthief said:

Hope life's treating you well!

Yep, life is good! :D 

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Lonemathsytoothbrushthief

I feel happy with my style these days, I love experimenting and am very much in a twink phase style wise. Also, weird feelings from having different documents/accounts with me down as male, female and non binary - I'm getting used to being a mr in the nhs' system, getting prescriptions etc, though tbh I sometimes have a disconnect with mx too :D It's hard to settle, and I still have all the trust issues to work through around trans stuff anyway so of course that affects any euphoria I get - getting used to having my gender affirmed by people who aren't gonna tell me something incredibly bigoted and dehumanising about people like me or my friends the next day, now that I've cut out many of the people who aggravated it.

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I've said it before but I'll mention it again, I really appreciate how thick my waist is and how non curvy I am by afab standards. Also that I'm tall enough to fall into the average height for men where I live (even if not even close for men in my family X'D). All of that makes it relatively easy to find clothes that fit. It could be better, and I want it to be better eventually, but it's also pretty okay as it is for what my style is right now. 

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nerdperson777
On 1/31/2020 at 9:58 AM, Starbogen said:

I've said it before but I'll mention it again, I really appreciate how thick my waist is and how non curvy I am by afab standards. Also that I'm tall enough to fall into the average height for men where I live (even if not even close for men in my family X'D). All of that makes it relatively easy to find clothes that fit. It could be better, and I want it to be better eventually, but it's also pretty okay as it is for what my style is right now. 

I've never been very curvy so I wonder if it's my ethnicity.  I think I would've felt bad if I was more curvy and bustier.  I'm unfortunately not that tall, being the youngest over 90% of the time.  I guess I should be grateful that I've attained average AFAB height so it's not too obvious.  I now fit into medium sized clothes instead of small.  But I guess I wouldn't want to be too big.

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I've always been fairly small and delicate.  My dad and brother are both lanky distance-runner types, so I think it runs in the family.

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nerdperson777
22 minutes ago, Karst said:

I've always been fairly small and delicate.  My dad and brother are both lanky distance-runner types, so I think it runs in the family.

I've been small but not delicate.  I got my dad's dense bones, my mom has said.  Sites seem to label me as having a medium sized frame.  I don't have my mom's fragility.  She bruises very easily.  I was almost always the youngest and smallest in my class, only having gotten to 5 feet tall at 13 when many of my classmates were already there by 11 or 12.  It is surprising now that I grew to a decent height.  I found some site that said that your height should be between that of your parents, more closer to the dad for guys and mom for girls.  I grew an inch on T so I'm actually meeting that approximate height for a male now.  It still isn't very tall, as my parents aren't, but it's good enough for me.

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