Teen Corner

[iyote]

7 hours ago, Miranda Keening said:

Um, but what does the 88 thing mean? 

It's a Nazi thing, a sort of dogwhistle for the alt-right.  

https://www.adl.org/education/references/hate-symbols/88

[Miranda Keening]

2 hours ago, iyote said:

It's a Nazi thing, a sort of dogwhistle for the alt-right.  

https://www.adl.org/education/references/hate-symbols/88

What?? Wow. Jeez. 

[Dr_Thorton]

1 hour ago, Miranda Keening said:

What?? Wow. Jeez. 

 

Yeah pretty messed up

[Artemis42]

I only learned of Operation Pride Fall today, from a video saying that it was mostly a troll thing from 4chan. I heard that people have been talking about it on there for years but nothing’s ever come out of it... I know I’m not the most informed person on this matter at all though. It’s still worth being cautious but the situation might be more okay than it sounds? Idk, just wanted to share what I’ve heard. Stay safe, everyone.

[Caliway]

Has anyone been open about their sexuality to classmates? I was thinking about coming out through an Instagram post or something as aro ace, and I think the people whose opinions I care about the most will be accepting. I also have a pretty good support network to help me, but one person who is a part of my support network I have not told. But I know high schoolers can be awful sometimes and I don’t live in a very progressive place. I was wondering if coming out is a positive experience for people because I am getting tired from hiding who I am. 

[Shanjace]

12 hours ago, Caliway said:

Has anyone been open about their sexuality to classmates? I was thinking about coming out through an Instagram post or something as aro ace, and I think the people whose opinions I care about the most will be accepting. I also have a pretty good support network to help me, but one person who is a part of my support network I have not told. But I know high schoolers can be awful sometimes and I don’t live in a very progressive place. I was wondering if coming out is a positive experience for people because I am getting tired from hiding who I am

I have considered doing exactly that, coming out on social media. I haven't yet though because I don't feel like people need to know that about me just yet. I have told my close friends though at school and they were all vv accepting. Most of em didn't get it in the beginning but it's been a few months and they understand now. I love having people know that I'm ace cause I can talk honestly about my feelings with them. I personally don't feel like I'm hiding who I am because people who doesn't know don't tend to ask that often but I do get where you're coming from. Idk if your friends know already but I'd say tell them first to see how they react, then decide if you want to be more open about it. Thats what I did and like I said, I haven't become public about it cause I decided that a few friends was good enough for me in the meantime. That was my experience and my choice, but it's up to you if you want to be more open about it 

 

(excuse the paranoia here but maybe wait till after pride month is over cause of the whole pridefall bs.... I'm sure nothing would happen if you did come out this month cause people can't even decide if asexuality is LGBT+ but still)

[Liana]

I am open about being ace with some of my close friends (though I follow a similar philosophy to Homer with labels), but I don’t want my family to know. Sadly things with my friends are weird as several are obsessing over trying to get with girls sexually, and one girl that one of my friends is close with started getting a ton of friends with benefits during the quarantine (her boyfriend broke up with her the week before it started).

 

I am glad to be done with high school, but am somewhat sad that I missed prom (though glad that I didn’t go with who I was planning on going with). No idea what the pridefall situation is.

[Miranda Keening]

On 6/2/2020 at 5:15 PM, Caliway said:

Has anyone been open about their sexuality to classmates? I was thinking about coming out through an Instagram post or something as aro ace, and I think the people whose opinions I care about the most will be accepting. I also have a pretty good support network to help me, but one person who is a part of my support network I have not told. But I know high schoolers can be awful sometimes and I don’t live in a very progressive place. I was wondering if coming out is a positive experience for people because I am getting tired from hiding who I am. 

I don’t have social media, so I honestly can’t tell you what to do on that front, but if you think it’s the best way to do it, go ahead. I’ll ask you this though: is it worth it? You said you don’t live in a progressive place, well what If people come at you for posting? I would just say to weight the pros and cons, and if all else fails, just stick to your friend group. Good luck! 
 

PS I do understand this though. I don’t live in a progressive place, 0% basically in terms of LGBTQIA+, so even if I had social media, coming out so publicly wouldn’t be an option. I have come out to close friends however. They support me. There is one I haven’t told, but she has so much going on, I don’t want to add it on. 

[a_nicole]

On 5/28/2020 at 7:29 AM, A.Ham said:

@Carbon-12, I've had one "crush" in my life on a guy I went to middle school with, and at the time I thought it was a pretty intense traditional crush. However, looking back on it, I think now that what I thought were romantic feelings was the desire to have a close platonic friend, especially since he was male and I didn't have a good boy          friend (NOT boyfriend) at the time. That was also during a time when I was struggling to make friends in high school, so I think it was a bit of just wanting companionship. Basically, the one crush I've had I believe was the desire to be friends, spend a lot of time with someone I knew was nice, and have a friend to talk to. 

I relate a lot to this. My best friend is gay and we are pretty close at this point. We are really the first best friends either of us have had. He’s actually the one who thought I might be asexual as I didn’t realize that other people actually were sexually attracted to people. Still blows my mind. Even though I know he’s gay and not interested in females, at one point I had a “crush” on him. Looking back on it, it was just an intense (platonic) love. I can never imagine kissing or cuddling anyone, but I just want to be around him all the time. I talk about him a lot and am always super disappointed when I can’t see him. He’s the best. At the time, I didn’t realize sexual attraction was really a thing. Sure, I knew high schoolers were having sex, but I guess I didn’t understand why. PDA had always made me uncomfortable. I never understood why you would even want to touch someone all the time. I guess that’s a thing. So, I thought that my intense platonic love was what people experienced as a crush. 
On the coming out thing, I don’t really feel like I need to. Of course my best friend knows, but he’s the only one. I’m sure people have kinda figured it out though. I never relate when people are talking about crushes or anything. I thought they were over exaggerating. I’m not that close with my family and I am heteroromantic, so I don’t feel like I need to tell them I’m not sexually attracted to anyone. I still want a relationship in the future, just more of an intense platonic love. 

[mexicanpotato]

On 6/2/2020 at 5:15 PM, Caliway said:

Has anyone been open about their sexuality to classmates? I was thinking about coming out through an Instagram post or something as aro ace, and I think the people whose opinions I care about the most will be accepting. I also have a pretty good support network to help me, but one person who is a part of my support network I have not told. But I know high schoolers can be awful sometimes and I don’t live in a very progressive place. I was wondering if coming out is a positive experience for people because I am getting tired from hiding who I am. 

I haven't, some think I'm straight other think I'm lesbian but I don't find coming out necessary not even to my friends. I feel like my sexuality is just another piece of what makes me me.

Good luck if you decide to come out!!

[A.Ham]

Y'all, so I've been having some anxiety lately about my female body (particularly my chest), so I bought some new sports bras to provide more coverage and try to make my chest appear flatter, and I am so excited! They're really comfortable, and even though they won't exactly work like a binder would, I'm still happy to be able to try something that might make me feel even a little bit more comfortable and confident. 🎉

[LiveLaugh(Love?)]

10 hours ago, A.Ham said:

I'm still happy to be able to try something that might make me feel even a little bit more comfortable and confident. 🎉

That's great, good for you!

[Artemis42]

13 hours ago, A.Ham said:

Y'all, so I've been having some anxiety lately about my female body (particularly my chest), so I bought some new sports bras to provide more coverage and try to make my chest appear flatter, and I am so excited! They're really comfortable, and even though they won't exactly work like a binder would, I'm still happy to be able to try something that might make me feel even a little bit more comfortable and confident. 🎉

Hey that’s awesome! I’m happy for you.

[no-longer-in-use]

Since most of us are spending a lot of time at home and online these days, I thought I'd repost the link to my Discord server for aspec teens here in case anyone wants to join. If you're 13-19 and arospec and/or acespec, feel free to join. We are accepting of all identities, pronouns, etc. and don't tolerate any kind of -phobia. We'd love to have you! Here's the link.

[QuirkyGeek]

15 hours ago, Coddiwomple said:

Since most of us are spending a lot of time at home and online these days, I thought I'd repost the link to my Discord server for aspec teens here in case anyone wants to join. If you're 13-19 and arospec and/or acespec, feel free to join. We are accepting of all identities, pronouns, etc. and don't tolerate any kind of -phobia. We'd love to have you! Here's the link.

I can confirm this is a fantastic server and a family!

[Miss_Bookworm]

17 hours ago, Coddiwomple said:

Since most of us are spending a lot of time at home and online these days, I thought I'd repost the link to my Discord server for aspec teens here in case anyone wants to join. If you're 13-19 and arospec and/or acespec, feel free to join. We are accepting of all identities, pronouns, etc. and don't tolerate any kind of -phobia. We'd love to have you! Here's the link.

Oooo I might get discord and sign up to join this!

[Confused Teen]

On 6/18/2020 at 7:29 PM, A.Ham said:

I'm still happy to be able to try something that might make me feel even a little bit more comfortable and confident. 🎉

That is awesome!!!!!!!!

[Confused Teen]

I have to say, browsing through AVEN has been suprisingly helpful.  I was expecting a whole bunch of different links to websites and stuff about the definition of asexuality, but but no, it actually has a whole buncha people sharing their personal experiences. (in my case secretly, no one knows that I have an account) And I can relate a lot more!!! which is fricken awesome.  And I think I am finally through that stage of going back and forth between self doubt, and total confidence. 🥳*imitates jazz hands*. It is a LOT of fun ranting!  I would rant to my friend who is demi, but she's in a relationship, so its not the same.

Edited June 21, 2020 by Entertainment 720

[elanlb]

2 hours ago, Miss_Bookworm said:

Oooo I might get discord and sign up to join this!

I got Discord earlier today just for this. It's like a knockoff of Slack (sorry Discord fans). But it was very worth it.

[Katrial]

      (Many apologies for this lengthy what-ever-this-is. I have spent over an hour on writing this, illegally, slightly before the Witching Hour, so happy to get all of this off my chest without being judged.)

     I've never had the words to explain why I didn't like anyone. Until three months ago, when I stumbled upon one of David Jay's talks about asexuality. Then something clicked. I wasn't completely sure until I researched a bit more, but the relief I felt when realizing I wasn't broken and nothing was wrong... Oh, a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. (It was through my googling of David Jay I found you wonderful people!)

     My parents are strongly anti-LGBTQ+, and growing up, I was discouraged from considering something outside of the hetero–normal standards. It also didn't help that I have been homeschooled my entire life. I wasn't really allowed to use the internet until I was nine or eleven, and didn't have much social interaction except for church. All this boils down into a sheltered kid whose first couple encounters of LGBTQ+ articles, events, etc. , was a) confusion, and b) I don't see myself having a sexual, if any kind of romantic relationship, possible. I didn't even know about Pride month until I was fifteen and happened on an Encyclopedia Britannia article explain why Pride month was celebrated and its early history.

      I once brought up me theoretically being bisexual in a conversation with  my mother, which was quickly shot down. And when I said I might be asexual two months ago, she said, "You are a celibate, heterosexual seventeen year-old girl. None of this gay or transgender nonsense."

      And now that I can finally understand myself, I want to shout it to the world and openly support this community. I want to wear a black ring, hang up a flag on my wall, tell my family and consequences be damned; whatever possible. I want to be open and honest. 

       But it is with a bitter heart I close my mouth, and seal my lips. Soon I will attend Uni and be free. Being seventeen and a senior sucks right now.

       Good night ya'll, and sorry for this. This crazy written monstrosity that I think sounds like, 'pity me'. For clarification, it is not pity I search for, but support and friends. That is all. If you have questions, I'll try my darnd-ed to answer. 

 

Edited June 30, 2020 by Katrial

[death angel]

hi

[Miss_Bookworm]

15 hours ago, deathreaper159 said:

hi

Hello!

[death angel]

[Katrial]

🎂

[HolyShrimp]

Hi folks! I’m new to aven and recently posted in “questions about Asexuality”. I was redirected here, so I thought I would share the same post to get the opinion of others around my age!

 

the post:

I've been questioning my sexuality for a while now. I'm never sure exactly how to identify. People always say that you just know by who you're attracted to, but I've never had a crush or been attracted to someone, as far as I can tell anyway. Until around a week ago I'd never considered the possibility that I could be asexual, but after doing much research through articles, quizzes, forums, and Instagram pages, I've started to feel as if I identify more with asexuality. The thing is, I'm only in my early teens and I'm worried that I'm just not old enough to have had the chance to meet someone that I would be sexually attracted to. I'm also worried that if I did come out as ace, and then decide that it doesn't fit later on, will I have just been taking advantage of the asexual community? Are these legitimate worries that others have, or is it just my anxiety?

 

Wondering if y’all have any advice or feel the same way?

[kenny.]

first of all... welcome @RazzberryCake!

Spoiler

 

i totally understand how things might be confusing for you right now, because it isn't always obvious! i think that my advice would be to take some time to get to understand yourself, even if it takes a little bit. if you feel that you might be ace, that's great too! let's say you did identify as ace and then later realized it didn't fit you, that would be totally okay and i don't think you'd be taking advantage of the community in any way! sometimes it can be a bit of a process, and whether or not you identify as ace or something else, you are entirely welcome here  i can't tell you what you are or what you aren't, it's up to you and how you feel, but feel free to ask any questions!

[HolyShrimp]

@kenny. Thanks so much for your advice! (And the cake of course)

[Guest]

Hi, I have known I am asexual for quite a bit, yet I start questioning if its because I am like only fourteen and people don't really get sexually attracted at this age (as far as I know). Sometimes people of the same age around me start cracking dirty jokes in a way which shows they might be interested in doing it sometime. Some I've seen also believe they will feel sexual attraction when they are older. I just don't see myself doing it or being engaged in any sex related activity or even marriage. I sometimes get confused but at the end of the day I know I am asexual. It's just weird to me because I am only fourteen, and almost everyone here is way older.

[iyote]

Personally I figured out I was asexual at 14, although I didn't come out to anyone until I was 17 (I'm now 18 and still hella ace).  I was pretty sure I was ace the entire time, and I self-identified as such internally, but I a) didn't want to deal with "you're too young" or "that'll change" comments and b) was aware that being a late-bloomer was a possibility.  So I just said I "wasn't sure" what my sexuality was if anyone asked, at least until I reached my later teens and became a bit more confident in saying "I'm asexual" out loud.  

Honestly, I'm not sure as to what age most people first experience sexual attraction, but I've heard that most people do know their orientation by 13/14, and based on age of consent laws, I assume that almost every allosexual first experiences sexual attraction before the 16-18 age range.  

[Guest]

1 hour ago, ItsAlwaysPrideDay said:

I'm only 13 (almost 14) and I am sure of my asexuality. It can be weird thinking of the age range here but what's most important is that you know who you are, young or not.

welp im actually 13 (im turning 14 soon so thats why i told 14)