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Asexuality: Can Someone TRULY Live A Happy Life Without Sex?

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SkyWorld

I'll be honest, I don't think I have ever started a new thread in World Watch before about an article I found, so I hope that I am doing this right.

 

Anyway, I found this article! http://www.yourtango.com/2016297792/asexuality-do-you-need-sex-be-happy

Author: Michael Castleman

Date: December 28, 2016

Quote

Asexuality is controversial. Sexologists have not settled on a consensus definition. The orientation’s true prevalence remains unclear. And while some sexologists call it a psychosexual disorder, others insist it’s a normal variation and not a problem.

 

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AspieAngel

I agree with the latter. It's a normal variation and not a problem. But many of us have been told we are abnormal by the mental health professionals. I know who I am and I am happy with who I am so their opinions have no relevance to me. I have chosen the solitary life but that in  no way means I am not happy. I also know couples who have long term sexless relationships. One couple has been together 15 years while another has been together 55 years and both are very satisfied with their lives. 

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R_1

I hate the usage of normal and not normal. Like what the hell is normal is anyway? If normal means the overwhelming majority as in 90%+ by huge statistics, then clearly any sexuality that's not heterosexual is clearly not normal, but likewise if normal means it happens in nature, then even necrophilia is normal. Actually, maybe we should abandon normal/abnormal in favor of just sexual orientation/sexuality, and preference/paraphilia to differentiate them without going on with what is normal anyway.

 

That being said, asexuality is fine by itself anyway.

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Éadweard

While everyone else complains and debates I'll just say I read the article and liked it. 

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cavalier080854

I do not go along with the "I identify as" thing. I am a Male, who happens to be Asexual, always have been. It's done, ended. Don't complicate things.

I'm 62, still a virgin, content and happy.

Though not always so. Usually sexuals spoil some of it by forgetting what I am. But, we all feel a bit unhappy now and again. But that applies to everyone.

I don't care what the sexologists/psychologists say, whether they agree or disagree with me. I live and breathe the life of asexuality. Nothing is going to change.

 

Which is why I have decided to leave AVEN tomorrow. The whole site is a Gender Studies class. My views are not wanted or needed if they disagree with the Ideology, most especially if they disagree (I'm wrong, outdated, privileged, bigoted, ignorant, need to be educated!). What has a 17 year old got that I have missed (arrogance of youth)..

A lot of questions are rhetorical, and only seek validation from others. Others are genuinely wanting answers. I don't like the whole hug box thing. I challenged myself alone, and developed a thick skin. You have to. Self reliance is a must without social media.

I was 44 when I encountered another asexual (5 to be exact, all at once). I prefer physical encounters with people, not the online encounters. You cannot delete your account, which makes me wonder, how many of the 88,000 members are real? What are the real active member numbers. Is this in order to inflate the importance of AVEN for asexual education as the biggest organisation.

I have met with some amazing people here, and I have enjoyed the 5 months being here. But the taboo topics (some are very dear to my heart and want to discuss so much), censored threads, and restricted free speech are making me unhappy.

 

So I wish all here a Happy New Year. And wish all Asexuals a successful journey to self discovery.

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Éadweard
2 hours ago, cavalier080854 said:

I do not go along with the "I identify as" thing. I am a Male, who happens to be Asexual, always have been. It's done, ended. Don't complicate things.

I'm 62, still a virgin, content and happy.

Though not always so. Usually sexuals spoil some of it by forgetting what I am. But, we all feel a bit unhappy now and again. But that applies to everyone.

I don't care what the sexologists/psychologists say, whether they agree or disagree with me. I live and breathe the life of asexuality. Nothing is going to change.

 

Which is why I have decided to leave AVEN tomorrow. The whole site is a Gender Studies class. My views are not wanted or needed if they disagree with the Ideology, most especially if they disagree (I'm wrong, outdated, privileged, bigoted, ignorant, need to be educated!). What has a 17 year old got that I have missed (arrogance of youth)..

A lot of questions are rhetorical, and only seek validation from others. Others are genuinely wanting answers. I don't like the whole hug box thing. I challenged myself alone, and developed a thick skin. You have to. Self reliance is a must without social media.

I was 44 when I encountered another asexual (5 to be exact, all at once). I prefer physical encounters with people, not the online encounters. You cannot delete your account, which makes me wonder, how many of the 88,000 members are real? What are the real active member numbers. Is this in order to inflate the importance of AVEN for asexual education as the biggest organisation.

I have met with some amazing people here, and I have enjoyed the 5 months being here. But the taboo topics (some are very dear to my heart and want to discuss so much), censored threads, and restricted free speech are making me unhappy.

 

So I wish all here a Happy New Year. And wish all Asexuals a successful journey to self discovery.

This site is a place for millennials to discuss "identity" and I completely agree with you. The funny thing is many think they created the word "asexual," which has been around forever and has been used to describe people way before they were born. 

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43pc
On 12/30/2016 at 4:58 AM, SkyWorld said:

Asexuality: Can Someone TRULY Live A Happy Life Without Sex?

Yes

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cavalier080854
2 hours ago, Just like Jughead said:

This site is a place for millennials to discuss "identity" and I completely agree with you. The funny thing is many think they created the word "asexual," which has been around forever and has been used to describe people way before they were born. 

Yes, I found in my search on asexuality in the 1970's, a first edition of an 1830 Dictionary in the British Library, where asexuality, in both variants, existed. For it to be included, it has to have been in existence a long time before this for it to be a justifiable entry.

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Éadweard

I le

2 minutes ago, cavalier080854 said:

Yes, I found in my search on asexuality in the 1970's, a first edition of an 1830 Dictionary in the British Library, where asexuality, in both variants, existed. For it to be included, it has to have been in existence a long time before this for it to be a justifiable entry.

I read an article about Lawrence of Arabia that said he was asexual and looked it up in a dictionary (the place you go to learn what words mean) which had a definition for a person who was asexual. I learned about this place from the Wikipedia article on Asexuality. I got no information on Asexuality from this website. I already knew what it was and that I was asexual. I thought this would be a good place to visit from time to time, but it's not really. I only log in out of boredom. I really get tired of the arguments and the constant, and I do mean constant, arguments on what asexual means and how no one who isn't asexual could possibly know what it means. 

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Frigid Pink

As long as it's "safe, sane, and consensual," then it's okay, regardless of whether or not people want to use "normal" or "abnormal" labels.

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borkfork
On 12/31/2016 at 3:18 AM, cavalier080854 said:

I do not go along with the "I identify as" thing. I am a Male, who happens to be Asexual, always have been. It's done, ended. Don't complicate things.

I'm 62, still a virgin, content and happy.

Though not always so. Usually sexuals spoil some of it by forgetting what I am. But, we all feel a bit unhappy now and again. But that applies to everyone.

I don't care what the sexologists/psychologists say, whether they agree or disagree with me. I live and breathe the life of asexuality. Nothing is going to change.

[...] What has a 17 year old got that I have missed (arrogance of youth)..

A lot of questions are rhetorical, and only seek validation from others. Others are genuinely wanting answers. I don't like the whole hug box thing. I challenged myself alone, and developed a thick skin. You have to. Self reliance is a must without social media.

I was 44 when I encountered another asexual (5 to be exact, all at once). I prefer physical encounters with people, not the online encounters. You cannot delete your account, which makes me wonder, how many of the 88,000 members are real? What are the real active member numbers. Is this in order to inflate the importance of AVEN for asexual education as the biggest organisation.

[...]

I got that the word asexual could be applied to humans from AVEN. That was almost five years ago and I'm just now participating the boards. It was important that no one else tell me about me. 

 

It's a pity. I think we could learn a lot about pre-internet asexuals and that would be beneficial for the community in general. Being people with a pre-internet history. We could learn from people who have already lived that life. Hell, I think the college kids could learn from 30 year-olds like me. But that's not how people think.

 

A lot of the members are people who created an account and forgot about it. I have a forgotten account myself.

 

Speaking to other asexuals in real life is very different. There are people here I'd like to get to know better. In real life we can actually have a beer and give each other our attention.

 

I wish you the best, wherever you go.

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biancaboricua13

Hmmmm...well, I knew I was asexual when I was teen and I am now 35. My aunt, a practicing psychologist noticed was the one that talked to me about it and she herself is asexual, now in her 70s and happily married. This article seems to make asexuality some mystifying thing amongst professionals when it isn't, I practice and it is no mystery and was quite relieved when the DSM was changed. 

My aunt and her husband have had my cousin but have lived without sex, both are asexual but wanted to have a child, albeit he is their only child. I am of the belief that couples or people in general can be happy without having sex. It isn't needed to have a fulfilling relationship, I'm sure there are many of us that have seen examples of this. 

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WhenSummersGone

So I guess someone can come on here accepting Asexuality as a new thing to most people but also reject new gender identity labels as if they are made up but not Asexuality. I'm sorry but I just don't understand.

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oldgeeza

I am happy with who I am, I can & indeed do live with myself, I have nothing to hide or be ashamed of.

 

I see nothing wrong with those who have sex, or different sexualities, or those who change gender, we are all individual, we all have our own views, as long as no one gets harmed, I see nothing wrong with sex, it's just not for me

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Abi-m-n

I'm only a teen, so I don't really have much experience with living a happy life, but as of right now, i am happy. I identify as asexual demiromantic and am perfectly happy myself. There is no need to have sex in order to have a fufilling life, media has worked sexual relations into being one of the most important things in life, but platonic relationships are just as important, and can sometimes be more important than sexual ones. I applaud this artical for not belittling the issue of asexuality as something being wrong with you, like many others I have read in the past, yet it still goes to show how under represented asexual individuals are that this is something that even people who study sexualities and majorly unaware of. 

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Starfall

I don't know that I would trust the opinion of anyone calling themselves a 'sexologist'. It sounds too much like something a drunk med student would use to hit on women at a frat party. 

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Éadweard
14 hours ago, Starfall said:

I don't know that I would trust the opinion of anyone calling themselves a 'sexologist'. It sounds too much like something a drunk med student would use to hit on women at a frat party. 

Learn what words mean. I guess you wouldn't trust a scientist's opinion on climate change either. By all means let's condemn people who are educated and spend their lives studying things (like sex and sexual behavior) and certainly not listen to their opinions. 

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Starfall
13 hours ago, Just like Jughead said:

Learn what words mean. I guess you wouldn't trust a scientist's opinion on climate change either. By all means let's condemn people who are educated and spend their lives studying things (like sex and sexual behavior) and certainly not listen to their opinions. 

It's a joke! You know a Joke? As in 'Something said or done to provoke laughter or cause amusement'? 

Learn to relax. I guess you wouldn't trust a comedian's opinion on a funny subject either. By all means let's condemn people who have a sense of humour and spend their lives trying to make others happy (through humorous jests and quips) and certainly not listen to their amusing anecdotes. 

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Sally
14 hours ago, Just like Jughead said:

Learn what words mean. I guess you wouldn't trust a scientist's opinion on climate change either. By all means let's condemn people who are educated and spend their lives studying things (like sex and sexual behavior) and certainly not listen to their opinions. 

Analogy fail.

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