Wiseja1987 Posted July 19, 2016 Share Posted July 19, 2016 What's the best advice you've ever received in terms of sexuality and relationships (of all kinds)? I'll be making a blog post about this, so I'd especially like to hear from Aces/Aros. The best advice I've ever received came from my favorite author, Dorothy L. Sayers: "You meet a lot of people disconcerted by the difference between what you do feel, and what they fancy you ought to feel; it's fatal to pay the slightest attention to them." Oh, for reference, this is the site it will go on: asexyadvice.wordpress.com Link to post Share on other sites
Hobbes∞ Posted July 19, 2016 Share Posted July 19, 2016 Actually you probably wanted a serious answer. I remember somebody telling me once that in life and love it's nothing like it is in books (which if you ask me is kind of a major letdown). They said life and love aren't really about big adventures or whirlwind romance, it's about learning to enjoy making cups of tea and putting the bins out. It took a while for me to think of them as less than crazy but I think I sort of get what they were saying. Still a bit crazy though~ Link to post Share on other sites
Scottthespy Posted July 19, 2016 Share Posted July 19, 2016 The best advice I've EVER gotten in ANY matter boils down to two things that have become mantras of a sort for me. The first is: Whenever you worry what people might be thinking of you, take a moment to realize that they probably aren't. And the second is: Those who matter don't mind, and those mind don't matter. The first is only related to sexuality tangentially, as people sometimes worry 'what people think' because of their lack of significant other or some such. It can be very relieving to realize and accept that most people are too busy worrying about their own problems to spend much time wondering about that coworker who never seems to participate in 'what me and my lover did' conversations. The second is much more applicable in all aspects of life, especially the second part of it. As difficult as it may be when people who are important to you have issues with who you are at a fundamental level, the idea that those who mind who you are should not be an influential part of your life can be very freeing. You do NOT need to stick with vitriolic, poisonous people just because you're related, or they were once friends, or whatever other reasons you come up with to justify valuing the opinions of people who do not value you. The truly important people, those who are good for you, will not tell you that something you do that harms no one is somehow bad. Those who WILL tell you such things do not need to have any importance in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Frigid Pink Posted July 19, 2016 Share Posted July 19, 2016 I like the quote that goes something like "when people show you who they are, believe them." Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseja1987 Posted July 27, 2016 Author Share Posted July 27, 2016 Thanks everyone! here's the result if you're interested: https://asexyadvice.wordpress.com/ Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.