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...Degrees of asexuality? And how to explain sexual need...


BoyliciousDarian

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My final word on the subject: If I was a parent of a 16-year-old and I found out they were in a relationship with a 21-year-old, I would have only two words to say: "Restraining Order".

In my country, the police would just laugh at you.

Actually, that's his country too. Says so right below his av.

And while the relationship might not be illegal in itself, the fact that a 16 year old person is dependent on their parents makes it perfectly possible, as far as I can see.

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BoyliciousDarian
And while the relationship might not be illegal in itself, the fact that a 16 year old person is dependent on their parents makes it perfectly possible, as far as I can see.

The parents would first have to take their own son to court and prove in a court of law that he was somehow unable to decide properly for himself before they could usurp his right to consent...

The best they could possibly do otherwise would be to get a restraining order for their house, because it's their property... But that wouldn't stop the boys from being together elsewhere, and not to mention the fact that restraining orders are a *lot* harder to get in Canada than they are in the US.

The chances of the 16 year old's parents successfully getting the 21 year old partner legally restrained from approaching the house is slim... The likelihood of the parents successfully having the 21 year old legally restrained from seeing the 16 year old person at all, against the will of the 16 year old person, is very close to zero. There would have to be extenuating circumstances, such as mental retardation on the part of the 16 year old, for the court to even consider the parents' request.

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I was 17 when I first started dating 27 years old guy, my current boyfriend. He's my mother's pacient, so she knows him as a person.

And it's a relationship I like, even if there's no love on my side.

I really think sexual relationships between teens and adults are no problems in general, and it's not the parent's issue, it's the issue of the two involved.

15/16/ year old boy isn't a child IMO, and isn't some d-mn stupid person to not be able to decide for themselves.

Guys, good luck with your relationship. I hope any problems will be solved quickly.

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  • 3 weeks later...
darkinnocence
How can you be physically attracted to someone and be averse to being intimate with them?

I am physically attracted to my boyfriend, but I`m asexual and to me having sex has nothing to how I feel about him. I don`t want him coming near me in that way, and he knows that. (Not that it stops him! :P) But the only I can think of explaining it is to me when i`m phyiscally attracted to somone, its more like I`m looking at a pretty picture or an amazing view and thinking "thats pretty" or "what a great view!" but thats as far as it goes. We can all appreiceate pretty views, but it doesn`t mean you`re turned on by it. Are you turned on by looking at a great sunset? :P

I probbaly made no sense there, but thought I`d try :)

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  • 2 weeks later...

You know, I almost feel bad in saying that I'm kind of what your boyfriend was like. I've always been asexual, but I've found a website about anti-sexuality. That though is a whole different world.

I try not to turn my boyfriend on. Sometimes I just like to play with him a bit but he gets like really aroused by it. And then other times I'm not doing anything at all and he still gets turned on. And I don't like to tell him when I don't want to do anything with him because he gets like really upset by it and then I feel guilty because I "made" him upset. I know I didn't really make him upset but I also know that most any other sexual in the same situation would have went with it.

I too don't like my boyfriend to masturbate so much either. It's anti-sexuality, like what I said before. I dunno, I'm not completely anti-sexual, but I do believe in a lot of the same things that other anti-sexuals believe in. I guess the main idea of anti-sexuality is that sex should not happen, that it's pretty much a curse to mankind. And I know not everyone here is anti-sexual. I'm just proposing that as a possibility, since things are kind of the same with me and my boyfriend.

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  • 3 weeks later...

From what I've heard it's helpful to sit down and both of you write out separately what must happen for the relationship to work. Pick a date for the deadline and confront one another with what you have written down. It's damned scary, but I've heard from a friend of mine it was the best thing to resolve deep seated problems in a realtionship that he ever tried. (He and his girl friend called it quits afterwards, by the way)

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