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Helpful info for those questioning their (a)sexuality


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On 7/21/2016 at 12:37 AM, haleh123 said:

hello, my name is haleh, i just found that there was a name for being asexual

i do not know if i am completely asexual, i think i might be gray a, because i do enjoy

kisses and cuddles, but i do not want real sex, am i asexual, if i am what label can

look into and check out

thank you for reading

haleh

Hi Haleh! Welcome to the community! Gray ace is someone who does feel sexual attraction sometimes but is rare. Kisses and cuddles are a part of platonic relationships, having platonic relationships is still asexual.

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So, I am wondering what I could identify as and how I work. Ever since hearing of LGBTQUIA+, I've been a supporting christian girl. Now I kinda get to understand I'm not that straight as well. I always thought I kept being single, because I first of all wanted to work on myself. Now I'm fine with myself and I got to search for other reasons. Were I too shy? Too lazy? Avoidant? I've never had anything close to trauma, but I thought I might be avoidant, because of being 3rd in a row of 5 kids.

However, now I found out about grey and demi, I think I might be like that. I find porn gross, but sex in a romantic movie like CMBYN is flipping cute. Some weeks ago I masturbated, thinking of sb I knew, imagining how we could get to build a relationship together to watch CMBYN and try out such kissing ourselves as well. I guess that's all sex experience I've ever had. However, I can kinda get turned on by sexy pictures.

I've also watched loads of videos about Timothée, to kinda crush on him, I guess that has been my only romantic experience.

How do I know if I am demi when I don't get into deep enough relationships to build some romantic or sexual relationship? Can you tell from my story?

Edited by bikingbed
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it’sjustme.

i’m so confused and would love for anyone to help me. can lithrosexual’s have romantic feelings for someone and want those reciprocated but just not the sexual desire part?

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it’sjustme.

can lithrosexual’s want romantic feelings and sexual attraction reciprocated just not sexual desire or is that something completely different? 

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On 7/2/2020 at 1:36 AM, it’sjustme. said:

i’m so confused and would love for anyone to help me. can lithrosexual’s have romantic feelings for someone and want those reciprocated but just not the sexual desire part?

Yeah, sexuality can be only about sexual attraction. Romantic attraction is a completely independent thing and doesn't have to have anything to do with it.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Figuringout30

Hi,

I am trying to figure out whether I might be asexual or grey or demi. It seems like a lot of people here instinctively knew this growing up and just never had sex because they didn't feel the need to. I didn't have a serious relationship until my mid 20s and never felt like I was missing anything up until that point although I was curious and experimented a bit. Then I was in a relationship for six years and one of the biggest points of contention was that according to my ex I just didn't desire him and would never initiate sex. One of the main reasons I haven't even looked for a relationship or a hookup this past year is because I don't  miss sex AT ALL. And thinking about having to have sex or come up with excuses why I don't want it just feels exhausting. But it's not like I didn't have some great sex with my ex or I was never horny. I am pretty confused...

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hi, I've spent a lot of time thinking and over thinking about this. I've established that I don't feel sexual attraction. Can I be asexual and be unsure about my attitude to actually having sex? Although my lack of sexual attraction remains constant my attitude toward sex and/or having it fluctuates. I'm worried if I come out that I'll be a fake ace if I don't know. Can I be asexual and be unsure about my attitude to actually having sex?

Edited by Brierley
I felt this explained me more
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BookishPotato

Hi everyone!

I think I am asexual, but I just wanted to get some advice from others in the community. I am 15 so this is in part to do with being too young and stuff. I don’t think I’ve ever found anyone hot, or sexy, or appealing in that way at all, and never understood why my friends got all hot and flustered over ‘hot’, shirtless guys. I’ve always viewed sex as a chore that I would eventually have to do one day, and never understood that it was important in a lot of people’s relationships. When everyone started to become obsessed with the idea of getting a boyfriend/girlfriend, I just wasn’t interested, and kind of assumed that everyone else was making it up or over-exaggerating everything. Any advice would be much appreciated. Also, I haven’t really gone into my romantic feelings much in this, but I would be interested in hearing from anyone who is aromantic about how they figured it out. Thanks!

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I'm not sure if I'm asexual.

I feel, like, all the kinds of attraction. I have romantic feelings too. I have a sex drive and occasionally masturbate. But I know that if i ever had the chance to actually have sex, I'd rather die than do it. Am I asexual, or just something else?

(people at my age usually don't have sex, but i know I wouldn't no matter how old i would be

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7 hours ago, CompletelyClueless said:

Man, I wish I’d read that before posting my question effectively begging people to do exactly that! My bad hahaha

That's fine. New members usually get a pass because they don't know better. We strongly stand behind this because there's a lot of debate on what asexuality is or isn't our how asexuality can present. There's people that would assume someone is our isn't asexual based on how they present or act, even though there's no way for me to know if you experience asexual attraction (and if you already knew if you did or not then you wouldn't be asking). So we try our best to teach our members how to guide the newbies to their answers and try to provide resources for members to point you towards. :)

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That’s cool. I found very quickly that there’s a ton of helpful information easily available if you just look for it.

 

A lot of my “am I?/aren’t I?” questions wouldn’t have needed to be asked in the first place if I’d just done a little research myself.

 

But some helpful people had kind words of encouragement so I’m grateful. 

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  • 3 weeks later...

I found this thread very helpful. I started to read this AVEN website and forums just today. And I started with the old ones. 

I got so confused because they contradicted themselves and some of them have been too complicated even for me...

Here you sum it so beautifully and easily.

 

In my 28th years I never had a relationship. And I don't crave to have some, but on the other hand it would be nice to meet someone who would like to share interests and laughter or hugs and kisses. So I guess it still counts as relationship ? But without the sex  part ? 

 

Because I was in religious art highschool I always had an excuse why I didn't have  any boyfriend. As I went to uni and I heard and saw more and more relationships, that was the time of my "first" because as they say "You will never know until you try it..."( And also the gynecologist flashbacks. Those have been the main part in the decision)...

 

So decided to have sex on my 20th birthday just because I didn't want the strange looks from the gynecologist like it happened last time my mum brought me there (around 16-ish yo). And it was horrible. (Both sex and the gynecologist before that) 

 

But I thought that non of the first times are awesome. 

So I decided to try it in the future again just to give it a "second chance". 

 

Because, well. All of us knows the topics of our friends as of " How they enjoy having sex and how someone is so hot they would like to "have him/her that night".

 

Right. I tried and I didn't like it.

 

Was it just because of my /his inexperience?  Even so I didn't try again up until 3-4 years after. And it was unexpected for the guy...  and me because the evening wasn't supposed to end like that. But I guess that's why I choose to allow that moment. It didn't feel forced from his side. But. I still didn't feel anything.

 

I mean the body reacted as it should. But my mind didn't really get what happed. I didn't experienced the so called excitement or anything close to that. 

 

 

Also I am having problems with understanding the jealous girlfriends of my male friends. Because I never look at them any sexual way. So then "Why would she accuse me of that ?" I felt so hurt being the excuse for someone to break up their relationship.

I still don't fully get their feelings for obvious reasons. But I am now avoiding  that kind of situations if possible. It's hard especially when you don't realise that, for someone, it could cause a "sexual response" in some way....(I don't know what way because it is usually just a talking about hobbies but whatever)

 

Now . After I moved to England and I skillfully avoided even a slight chance of any romantic tries (dates /flirting) from guys. Because in my mind I saw that I  would be expected to have sex with them at some point. 

 

Two years ago I finally somehow came across an article about asexuality. And I thought.. "Well it sounds familiar" but I didn't pay any more attention to it. 

But if I want to be honest to my self and to any possible future I need to explore myself more honestly as well.

 

And so ... I think I am some kind of asexual. (Big exhale)

I don't know yet what exactly is the label for me. Because I don't mind touching myself...

I also have a biiig fantasy(dark art past is shoving it's teeths :D ). And when I get to that rare  points in time I can have fun times just from my fantasies. (Usually about two guys I am never in the centre of it, which  I still don't quite get why. ) 

 

The bodies in real life are just as some form of art for me. I appreciate pretty structures. I don't mind to tell compliments to a man or woman.  For that matter. But with man it gets more complicated because they think I am  flirting with them. 

 

But usually I am just stating what I see in my world. 

 

So yes. My life will probably finally make sense. And I may finally say to the attempts of my friends to "hook me up" with someone,(these days .. because "I am almost 30 oh lord how can I be still single....")   why I  am avoiding it like a fire. 

 

Its a good start of self exploration ( not sure if is it the right word :D

 

Thanks. 

 

 

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27 minutes ago, Feliciti0 said:

I found this very helpful. I started to read this website just today. And I started with the old ones. 

I got so confused because they contradicted themselves and some of them have been too complicated even for me...

Here you summ it so beautifully and easily.

In my 28th years I never had a relationship. And I don't crave to have some, but it would be nice to meet someone who would like to share interests and laughter or hugs and kisses. So I guess it still count for relationship ? But without the sex  part ? 

 

I decided to have sex on my 20th birthday just because I didn't want the strange looks from the gynecologist like it happened last time my mum brought me there. And it was horrible. (Both sex and the gynecologist) :D but I guess non of the first times are awesome. 

So I decided I will try it in the future just to give it a chance. 

Because, well. All of us knows the topics of our friends as of " How they enjoy having sex and how someone is so hot they would like to "have him/her that night".

 

Because I was in religious art highschool I always had an excuse why I didn't have  any boyfriend. As I went to uni and I heard and saw more and more relationships, that was the time of my "first" because as they say "You will never know until you try it..."( And also the gynecologist flashbacks. Those have been the main part in the decision)...

 

Right. I tried and I didn't like it.

 

Was it just because of my /his inexperience?  Even so I didn't try again up until 3-4 years after. And it was unexpected for the guy...  and me because the evening wasn't supposed to end like that. But I guess that's why I choose to allow that moment. It didn't feel forced from his side. But. I still didn't feel anything.

I mean the body reacted as it should. But my mind didn't really get what happed. I didn't experience anything mentally. 

Also I am having problems with understanding the jealous girlfriends of my male friends. Because I never look at them any sexual way.

"Why would she accuse me of that ?" I felt so hurt. 

I still don't fully get their feelings for obvious reasons. But I am now avoiding  that kind of situations if possible. It's hard especially when you don't realise that, for someone, it could cause a "sexual response" in some way....(I don't know what way because it is usually just a talking but whatever)

Now . After I moved to England and I still avoided even a slight chance of any romantic tries (dates /flirting) from guys. Because I had in mind that I would be expected to have sex with them at some point. (Not pleasant memories)

 

Two years ago I finally somehow came across an article about asexuality. And I thought.. "Well it sounds familiar" but I didn't pay any more attention to it. 

 

But if I want to be honest to my self and to any possible future I need to explore myself more honestly.

 

And so ... I think I am some kind of asexual. (Big exhale)

I don't know yet what exactly is the label for me. Because I don't mind touching myself...

I also have a biiig fantasy(dark art past is shoving it's teeths :D ). And when I get to that rare  points in time I can have fun times just from my fantasies. (Usually about two guys which  I still don't quite get why. ) 

 

The bodies in real life are just as some form of art for me. I appreciate pretty structures. I don't mind to tell compliments to a man or woman.  For that matter. But with man it gets more complicated because they think I am  flirting with them. 

 

But usually I am just stating what I see in my world. 

 

So yes. My life will probably finally make sense. And I may finally say to the attempts of my friends to "hook me up" with someone,(these days .. because "I am almost 30 oh lord....")   why I  am avoiding it like a fire. 

 

Its a good start of self exploration ( not sure if is it the right word :D

 

Thanks. 

 

 

26 and never had sex. I promise you you're fine. Lol

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Could my asexuality be caused by my borderline personality disorder - having an unstable sense of self and not knowing who I am or what I want? And/or by having such extreme concerns about my body that I am subconsciously too scared to share it with another person?

 

I'm not saying this is true for anyone else or pathologising asexuality in any way. I totally get that it's a valid thing and not weird or abnormal or wrong for a lot of people. I'm only asking whether it's possible that in some cases (mine) there could be a disorder that contributes to it.

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I'm realizing I'm asexual and am a bit freaked out. It's all new and scary.

Edited by HurricaneK
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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi, I am Lemon(24). Since I hit puberty I had always been curious about sex, since everyone at school were gossiping at that time. Soon I was 19 and tried to try what it was like. It felt bland. There was no magic they talked about. It felt good up to a point but when the actual thing started it felt like nothing. 

 

I though maybe it's because the guy was not good enough or maybe I was not into it so i tried a few more times. The results were the same. I enjoyed intimacy but not sex. Then as time went by even sexual talks became tiring as it had always been empty talks for me. Soon I loved this boy. But we broke up after a while. He called me broken and I was really loosing hope at that time.

 

I found the term asexuality. I thought maybe there are some similarities so I researched further. I discover I may be automatic asexual. But I am still confused. Do I really hate sex, do I feel sexual attraction and stuff. It's hard to accept

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SmaugtheDragon
On 10/4/2020 at 1:51 PM, LemonSquash said:

Do I really hate sex, do I feel sexual attraction and stuff. It's hard to accept

I know what you mean. I feel like for me, I identify as aromantic asexual, but I question my sexuality every day. For me with sexual attraction it's like, "How can I know if I feel something if I don't know what it feels like because I've never felt it, but if I had felt it, I wouldn't know if it was." 

 

What helps me a lot is really simple actually. It's a question that I ask myself. "If I could have sex with no consequences whatsoever, would I do it, and not just because I am curious about it". The answer is no for me, which really helps me to realize that I am ace. 

 

Also, if you feel that you are asexual, go ahead and use the label, you are the only one that defines who you are.  I also think that looking into the different types of attraction (sexual, romantic, platonic, aesthetic, sensual etc) may help you discover more. I feel like in the beginning, I confused aesthetic attraction for sexual attraction, and learning about the different types of attraction really helped me figure out how I wanted to identify.

 

And if, at the end of all the questioning and the research, you find out that you don't identify, or want to identify as ace, that's perfectly fine! Labels can change, and nothing is set in stone just because you've been looking into asexuality.

 

Good luck with your researching, and trust yourself :) 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I’m 21 and have debated with myself about if I’m asexual or not since I was 16. The first time I thought of it, I remember looking at all of my classmates and thinking, “huh, honestly I’m not attracted to any of these people” but then I pretty much chalked that up to those people just being... well high schoolers. But I was still always “the friend” and never “the girlfriend”, but that was my choice. Over the years I’ve had sex with people, but I’ve always felt like it was more expected of me, rather than me actually wanting to have sex. I often found myself feeling uncomfortable or not like myself after sex, and I didn’t and still don’t like to masturbate. I felt like because everyone around me was so open about their sexuality and everyone LOVED sex, that I had to love it too. My first committed relationship is the one I’m in now, and I think what makes my partner different from anyone else I had ever had sex with, is that we actually very very rarely have sex, and our relationship is more based on our friendship and how comfortable we are with each other. My partner has actually told me that he’s thought he might be asexual before, but I think he’s leaning more towards greysexual now. I love him a lot, and I love kissing him, but once again, I still always feel uncomfortable after having sex, even with someone I feel so absolutely comfortable with. I just don’t think that sex is necessary in my relationship, and would honestly like to stop having sex altogether. Basically my questions are: 1) is it possible that my sexual drive in the past was a result of societal pressure I felt around me? And 2) is me feeling not like myself after having sex or being uncomfortable with myself after having sex a sign of Asexuality?

Edited by EJ_
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  • 3 weeks later...
On 6/15/2016 at 8:06 PM, theotherfey said:

I know for sure I am asexual, but I am trying to figure out my romantic orientation. I was actually thinking of creating a thread for it, because I want others' opinions. At first I was thinking I'm biromantic, then extended it to pan, because I'm open to the idea of being with someone who is trans or gender-nonconforming, but then I went back to bi because that can include more than just male and female.

However, I'm not entirely sure I want a romantic relationship. I like the theory of it, and I have deep feelings for a couple people, but I'm wondering if I'm aro or demi. I also thought for a time that while I might be biromantic, I might be homosensual. I don't want to have sex, but I would be more open to touching and kissing a female than I would a male. But I really don't know.

I feel very similarly to you! I am in a romantic relationship and I’m confused about how I fall on the romantic spectrum. I think I would also be more comfortable kissing a female, and I think there is a sexual orientation for a bisexual(or biromantic) who is more often attracted to females, although I forget the word. 

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On 7/20/2016 at 3:07 PM, haleh123 said:

hello, my name is haleh, i just found that there was a name for being asexual

i do not know if i am completely asexual, i think i might be gray a, because i do enjoy

kisses and cuddles, but i do not want real sex, am i asexual, if i am what label can

look into and check out

thank you for reading

haleh

I think you could use the term asexual to fit what you are feeling, at least that is what I use. I also enjoy cuddles but no kissing or anything more. 

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  • 3 weeks later...
Cristopher JH

Hello, for a long time I have avoided thinking too much about my sexuality, mainly because I can't make sense of it, and since there are so many categories and subcategories, I'm just asking for a "second opinion" 

I've always felt "love" and attraction, have fell in love but the problem it's that it's not just a single emotion, it's not just attraction wen it happens, I feel the initial attraction, than love, but it quickly turns into unsettling and uncomfortable feeling, or I can have deep feelings twords a lot of people (regardless there gender or sexuality) but I prefer keeping things friendly. I like the idea of love, I idealize myself in a relationship but after further thought I cancel the thought. If I manage to get in one, it just doesn't feel ok. For some time I've told myself I'm bisexual, but I never felt like anything really, I have sexual desire sometimes but I don't really need another person. It's like I only feel sexualy inclined when hormones are active but i always settle with ace, I don't know I'm so conflicted. Any thoughts? 

Edited by Cristopher JH
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  • 3 weeks later...
✨jupiter✨

Hi. I am a 15 year old female. I have identified as cis/straight all my life. I have never had a crush on a boy (or a girl) in my life, or been sexually attracted to anyone.  Heard about asexuality for the first time recently, started doing research because I identified with it, and found this website. Am I too young to know for sure? The idea of sex grosses me out. I want to have a relationship with someone, but it is not the most important thing for me. I have always appreciated and recognized beauty, in boys and girls, but I have never found someone "hot" or had sexual thoughts about them. I have yet to get my period (late starts runs in the family), so maybe hormones haven't kicked in yet? I have always been the quiet and "mature" one in my friend group, so maybe I will just experience all this later? Or maybe I'm demi? Its even possible that I'm aro? Sorry, I just have so many questions

Edited by ✨jupiter✨
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christmas vibes

Hey, I'm a 14 year old girl and I think I might be asexual. I definitely know I'm capable of romantic feelings - I've had crushes for as long as I can remember. However, I don't think that I've ever had 'sexual' attraction before. I can recognise when someone is 'hot', but I don't get sexual thoughts or feelings about them. I joke about sex a lot and my humour is quite dirty, but talking about it feels kind of empty. Watching porn just makes me cringe. I know that 14 might be too young to decide whether or not I'd want to have sex with someone, but I've tried sexual things such as making out with my boyfriend, and they don't do much for me. Where he says he enjoys it, I personally get slightly uncomfortable. But I know that I definitely do have genuine romantic feelings for him.

I don't know anyone else in real life that I can talk to who is asexual, so I came here looking for help on whether or not I actually would fit in with the definition. Any responses really would be very helpful. Thanks :)

Edited by christmas vibes
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On 12/11/2020 at 5:45 AM, jupiter said:

Am I too young to know for sure?

Hey I myself was 15 when I figured out that I am aro-ace so I don't think that you are too you and there also is the fact that you can always change your lable if you want. Taking on a lable is not something final.

21 hours ago, christmas vibes said:

I don't know anyone else in real life that I can talk to who is asexual, so I came here looking for help on whether or not I actually would fit in with the definition.

Wherther your asexual or not is something you yourself have to decide but to me it sounds like you could be asexual, maybe it could be helpful to try that lable out. After all figuring out your sexual identity is not something that is easy to most people. But if you don't want to have sex or feel uncomfortable with it you shouldn't have sex. And that doesn't depend on wherther you're asexual or not.

 

21 hours ago, christmas vibes said:

I can recognise when someone is 'hot', but I don't get sexual thoughts or feelings about them.

Sexual attraction isn't neccessarily astetic attraction. For most people their the same but for me there different. I still can say if someone is hot or not, eventhough I'm asexual.

 

So I hope I could help you two and if you still have any questions feel free to ask me.

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Hey,

 

I'm 20 and finally accepting who I am(at least with the best label I know right now).

 

For context, I've only dated once, recently, and it was long distance for a couple of months. I was 19-20 and I felt like I needed to be with someone, or else I wasn't normal. With my gf I never experienced sexual attraction unless I forced myself, and I mean even then I doubt it was the real thing. I would only tell my partner "yea I'd like that" and stuff when we sexted while feeling nothing.(It was a long distanced relationship.) I assumed that it was because she wasn't right there that I didn't feel anything.

 

But that didn't make any sense, because she would be constantly able to satisfy herself and I would just pretend I did too. I ended up breaking up with her because it was just too annoying to do that everyday, it felt like a waste of time(There were other reasons but like whatever).

 

Prior to her I had two "sexual" encounters, one when I was drunk out of my mind on the birthday and made out with a random dude at a party, and second when I made out witth another dude I had been talking 2 for about a month. Both times either grossed me out or gave me nothing, and I had fleetingly thought of the prospect of asexuality, but I dismissed because I thought my college life wouldn't be "fun" without sex.

 

Obvi I was wrong, so soooo wrong. After my gf I was only left disappointed and confused. I don't even want to explore the fact that I really didn't even love her, and just wanted to be friends–I'm a bit scared of the chance that I'm Aro too. So I started to research/google, and found myself relating a lot more to Asexuality than I was ready for. I've rarely ever had crushes, except on fictional characters. My daydreams where always like cute mangas, I never thought about having sex with someone as a need before. I value friendships so much, to the point where I can't understand prioritizing a SO over friends. When I was with my gf I was so happy it was long distance, since it meant we never had to be intimate.

 

I feel so free now. I was worried I just would never have those moments in the movies, I would never fall in love and have that intense sex like in Outlander or something. Now that I know I don't need it, or rather that it isn't for me, I feel like I can just live true to myself.  I don't have to think about finding someone on like 20 different dating apps or lie about how I feel becuase I'm supposed to feel something when I don't. I can just be me :) (I think I'm a biromantic asexual buttttt idk)

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Hi! I’m currently questioning (obviously) and I’ve realized recently that though I have sex a fair amount with my boyfriend, he’s almost always the one to initiate it and to be honest it always feels more like I’m doing it for him rather than me. I do enjoy it while I’m doing it, but most of the time I could easily go without. I’ve looked at your definitions, and I don’t know if I quite fit cause I do experience some physical attraction, but still. I don’t know if there’s a different sexuality that fits me better, or if my libido is just really low, but I’m starting to feel bad cause a lot of times when my boyfriend mentions sex (usually joking around about it) I just try to laugh and change the topic because honestly I don’t really want to. I know this is long and rambling, but I’d appreciate any opinions. Thanks!

Edited by Snowglobe
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  • 2 weeks later...

Hey. I've read the article but not the comments, so my question might already be answered somewhere. I'm sorry if that's the case.

 

I'm 19 and of male sex and gender. I recently started to wonder whether I'm asexual and I'd like some help figuring that out. 

 

I find certain characteristics of some women attractive. Ironically, I usually find them more attractive when clothed, rather than not. I do masturbate and consume porn. However, I feel extremely uncomfortable when I am presented with a sex scene from a movie or a book, or a story about some sexual experience and it usually makes me think that sexual engagement is something I absolutely don't want. I don't think I would like to sexually engage with someone at this point, despite fantasizing about how attractive some parts of the body of people I've seen are. I'm not sure if I'd like to engage in a romantic relationship either, since I don't seem to understand exactly what a romantic relationship is and isn't. 

 

Case study (sort of): I really like the appearance and personality of a girl. I've known her for a while, since we belong on the same friend group. I find her attractive. The thought of having sex with her or any other person doesn't seem pleasant. I'd like to get to know her better and spend more time with her but I don't know if I'm romantically attracted to her or anyone else. 

 

I'm very confused as to where I belong. I am attracted to certain women and masturbate and usually have a high libido. I feel however uncomfortable with the idea of having sex with someone and appalled by written or verbal descriptions of sexual acts. I don't know what kind of relationship I want with people and it seems like I'm only here to observe. I enjoy friendships and time with people I like. Any directions or help in any form would be appreciated. 

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Hey, I have a few questions. So I am 15 years old and I definitely think that I am asexual. I just don't even like the thought about sex with someone, because it is just not my defintion of love. I never liked sex education and tried to avoid it. I do feel sometimes 'butterflys' in my stomach from the opposite gender, but I only had two that I knew. The other ones were celebs or fictional characters. But if I have then it doesnt last long and the only things I can imagine are like holding hands, cuddling,... soft kisses but not those kind of 'passionate'. I don't really feel in need to be in a realtionship (especially not with someone who isn't asexual). I like true friendships but also just with my gender bc the one makes my uncomfortable. I never experienced any trauma like this, it is just bc their sexual thoughts. So I would be happy in a realtionship, but also without. And I dont like the idea of getting married (and even more having kids). It is kinda hard to speak about it because most people (in my environment) can't relate to my feelings. Also a reason why I didn't tell it anyone. And when I have a crush (somebody i know) that it is hard for me to speak with them (it feels like i loose the ability to speak). I just wanted to say that it is really nice that you help many people and you are doing a great job. I feel comfartable to tell my story here :) I just wanted to ask you if you can help me and maybe suggest wich 'kind' of asexuality is for me. I am sorry about my english and the long text.

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