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Lmaohelpme

What age is too youngt to identify as ace?

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Lmaohelpme

Just curious.

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Mike_Rophone

Zero. You aren't too young to be ace. If you feel like that will change later in life, that is fine, too.

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Maiflower

I don't think you're ever really too young, but the age I think where they're most likely going to be ace forever would be around 12-14.

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AnniS

I have known that I was ace pretty much since I was four (even though I didn´t know that concept actually existed), so I would agree with the others and say there´s no age limit ^_^

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Jturpin0527

I'd say the younger the better. Just finding out a name for my oddness at 46. Life could have been so much simpler. Blessings to you ^_^

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Philip027

If you are old enough to know what sexual orientations are you are old enough to know what yours is.

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DannyFenton123

If you are old enough to know what sexual orientations are you are old enough to know what yours is.

Beat me to it ;)

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Tripp

When you're a kid you are basically asexual (unless you're strange). It would probably depend on the person.

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Elluna Hellen

I have known that I was ace pretty much since I was four (even though I didn´t know that concept actually existed), so I would agree with the others and say there´s no age limit ^_^

I'm confused. Four? How?! How'd you realise you were different? :o

Eh, IDK. Took me until I was 23 to really come to terms with 'no, you're not a late bloomer' because I wanted to be sure. I don't think any age is really too early, though I would advice to wait until you're in your teens to actually start telling people (because even then you get the 'too young to know' thing, from what i've seen xD). I do know that I noticed something was 'off' with regard to romantic attraction when I was twelve, though!

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Caged Bird

I think I always knew, even when I was really really little, that I saw relationship's differently to most people, I've ALWAYS thought surely the person matters more than how they look and all the baggage that comes with relationships is only there because you like that person not for the baggage itself, but decided asexual in teens, so probably any age, but it's not something you usually think about before about 13-ish

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clarabella

I certainly knew when I was ten years old though I had no word for it and one of my friends knew she was gay around the same age. I don't really think that there is a lower age limit though agree that very small children are essentially asexual.

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dissolved

Providing they accept that things can and (judging by 99% of the world) likely will change, that they should only identify as something as long as it fits, and to not force themselves to "stay" as that identity, then I don't see an issue with age.

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Tanzanite

2, I guess. That's usually the age when kids can't read yet let alone research sexual orientation, right?

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Tripp

For me, I figured it out when I was about 12-13 but had no idea how to describe it so I didn't know I was different until I was in my later teens.

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stayouttawoolworths

I think modern kids are pressured to start thinking about (hetero-normative) relationships way too early. Media and social pressures keep inundating elementary school age kids and younger with ideals of romance, when they should just center on having fun, making friends, and learning about the world, and having one less thing to worry about. So as a principle, I would agree with the answer zero, but my personal opinion is that kids in general should start questioning themselves and consider whether to pursue relationships around 12-14. I know I would have been happier if my own social climate worked that way.

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Yatogami

Any time before puberty is my guess. That can be as young as 10-14 years of age. This is true for sexuals as well, they don't develop attraction properly till after puberty.

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OneTonSoup

This thread made me feel a bit better about myself now lol

13 currently :P

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Shaded

It's hard to say, from my stance.

I found out I was asexual at age 16, which was the age that i found the word itself, read the definition, and said, holllllly mother of god that's me. And this huge weight left my shoulders.

And i'm thinking, if I found the word earlier to being 16, I would have had the same reaction, but even when I was on here at 16 (I'm 23 now) many people told me I was too young to know, even though I was sure, and still am. So I really think it's going to depend on the specific person, which is a bit of a crappy answer but there it is.

Some people will know at 13, some will find out at 40, it just depends.

I think as a general rule, anytime during puberty or after it makes sense to me. Before that, I don't think many sexual kids are thinking about sex either, but I don't know.

And I think an important thing to say is that, if YOU feel you are asexual, at ANY age, then you have 100% right to identify as an asexual. If you change, then so can how you label yourself, and there's nothing wrong with that at all. If right now asexual is a term that fits you, so you identify as it, but later you start to have sexual feelings, it was still fine to identify yourself as asexual.

My advice is to keep an open mind always. Never pigeon hole yourself into something completely, because things happen, signs are misunderstood, and people change and develop. Be who you are, whoever that is, as long as you aren't hurting anyone :D

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Whispearl

I think the only time you're too young is when you can't really observe clearly that you're different from everyone else because developmentally nobody's really thinking about attraction like that yet. And that also varies a lot with environment. Basically, if you can pinpoint a difference between yourself and others based on how you experience attraction, then you're probably old enough to identify yourself.

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catsnwaffles

I personally believe there is no point in your life where you're "too young" to decide. Most of my friends have decided they are not straight, and we're talking about 11-12 year olds here. My best friend has known they were not straight since a very young age, although they're just now identifying themselves as a panromantic asexual. Now yeah yeah, I know we are considered "too young" to decide our sexual orientation, but I beg to differ. Many of my straight friends already have sexual feelings, they've decided their path, and so can anybody else, no matter what age. Of course kids younger than me don't have the feels yet, but in my opinion, it's never too early to decide.

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Star Inkbright

I personally believe there is no point in your life where you're "too young" to decide. Most of my friends have decided they are not straight, and we're talking about 11-12 year olds here. My best friend has known they were not straight since a very young age, although they're just now identifying themselves as a panromantic asexual. Now yeah yeah, I know we are considered "too young" to decide our sexual orientation, but I beg to differ. Many of my straight friends already have sexual feelings, they've decided their path, and so can anybody else, no matter what age. Of course kids younger than me don't have the feels yet, but in my opinion, it's never too early to decide.

I guess my only issue with that is that when you're young, your orientation is much more liable to change . . . for example, it's not uncommon for people to be more bisexual as teenagers and then settle closer to hetro- or homosexual as they get older. You're right in that it's never too young to decide, but when you're younger, in my opinion you shouldn't expect your decisions to be set in stone as much. And that lack of set-in-stone-ness is why I personally wouldn't feel confident identifying as ace as young as eleven or twelve. Hell, it was hard enough deciding to do it at sixteen and it turns out I may have been wrong about that.

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Sisky

By that logic, we should never do anything we're not absolutely 100% sure about. Why should the possibility that something about you changes keep you from identifying the way you are now? People change all the time.

If I had known the words for it, I would definitely have identified as aromantic and asexual around the age of 6-8 when all the other little girls found celebrities and boys "cute" and that made about as much sense to me as eating bicycles.

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Star Inkbright

By that logic, we should never do anything we're not absolutely 100% sure about. Why should the possibility that something about you changes keep you from identifying the way you are now? People change all the time.

If I had known the words for it, I would definitely have identified as aromantic and asexual around the age of 6-8 when all the other little girls found celebrities and boys "cute" and that made about as much sense to me as eating bicycles.

Sorry, I worded that wrongly . . . I do support people to identify the way they want now even if it's not set in stone, but I /personally/ am not comfortable with identifying a certain way unless there's a certain degree of certainty to it.

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Sisky

Okay, makes sense. :) I'm the same, actually. I wouldn't call myself anything without at least some evidence to back it up.

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fiver

honestly it doesnt matter that much, but i'd say it's possible to know you're ace during and after puberty, but not before. this is different from other sexualities, because asexuality deals only with sexual attraction, and ace people are more likely to have a different romantic orientation, while hetero/homo/etc sexual people usually have matching romantic and sexual orientations (unless theyre aro of course). since young kids experience romantic attraction, but not sexual attraction, i'd say it's not possible to know if you're ace before puberty, but it is possible to know if you're aro. 

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uhtred

You can identify yourself as asexual at any time you want,  but you should always be aware of your own change in feelings and not think that you are somehow "betraying" your identity if you later develop sexual attraction. 

 

Many peoples sexual desires are quite variable  until they are in their 20s or older.  I have a friend who really only realized he was bisexual when he was in his late 30s. 

 

My only concern with identifying as ACE (or any other orientation) early is that I think that identification might tend to lock-in your world view a bit, and reduce the amount you allow your feelings to change with time. 

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Telecaster68

If you asked pretty much any kid under about 10 if they wanted to have sex with anyone they'd say 'no', so to that extent, clearly it can be pretty young. But it wouldn't be a very meaningful answer.

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M.J

oH

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Nylocke
On 2/28/2018 at 8:24 AM, Telecaster68 said:

If you asked pretty much any kid under about 10 if they wanted to have sex with anyone they'd say 'no', so to that extent, clearly it can be pretty young. But it wouldn't be a very meaningful answer.

 

This would be accurate in most cases but some kids "develop" much younger then the rest of us. My ex told me that he was "advanced" in this area probably because he was exposed to porn at a young age 

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Iridium

People reach maturity at different ages, and orientations occasionally change over time.

So I would say there's no universal answer to that question.

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