Masculine Mannerisms

[LassieBee]

I know that LOOKING male is only half of passing so could anyone help me with mannerisms? I know guys sit with their legs spread more than girls and I know guys swagger when they walk. I know they stand with hands in their pockets but what other mannerisms are important when trying to pass as a guy?

[Baam]

I've noticed that they tend to hold their shoulders high. Even those that don't, have wider shoulders than females anyway, so if you hold your shoulders up higher it makes it look like they're wider (and more masculine).

[andreas1033]

Personally i do not look at people, so really for me i cannot answer this.

[Panth.]

There is a nod-thing between men (basically an "I acknowledge your existence" nod), not sure if it is universal but I haven't failed to get a response from anyone Ive run into in the northeast US. Can other people confirm?

[jack616]

Lead with your shoulders not your hips is a useful tip :)

[LassieBee]

There is a nod-thing between men (basically an "I acknowledge your existence" nod), not sure if it is universal but I haven't failed to get a response from anyone Ive run into in the northeast US. Can other people confirm?

I live in Ireland and everyone does this, regardless of gender. We also half wave at people when crossing roads.

[Evren]

Guys don't do the leaning into a counter thing as much as women do. If they do, they usually put their backs to it. The swagger thing is really hard for me to get exactly, because I think they actually walk with their legs farther apart. A lot of it is just a level of confidence, the spreading out more claims more territory, it's an instinct thing. I am stronger than you because I own more stuff.

Where I live the nod seems to be male and female, it might depend upon area.

Also when women stand for awhile they tend to lean to one side of another, with their hips cooked out, men do this but rarely, they usually just plant both feet farther apart.

People watching is really helpful with this, I watch at my work a lot.

There are more differences in school, men ask more questions than women. They also usually participate more.

It comes down a lot to confidence, men usually have more confidence then women. This is a unfortunate part of our society,but it's true,

I love things like this :). Hope that some of this helps you.

[Merperson]

When talking, men don't usually use their hands as much as women. They also tend to be more direct with their words.

[Light02]

I've read that when you move your hands around you should imagine that you're underwater, move slower.

[Light02]

Guys don't do the leaning into a counter thing as much as women do. If they do, they usually put their backs to it. The swagger thing is really hard for me to get exactly, because I think they actually walk with their legs farther apart. A lot of it is just a level of confidence, the spreading out more claims more territory, it's an instinct thing. I am stronger than you because I own more stuff.

Where I live the nod seems to be male and female, it might depend upon area.

Also when women stand for awhile they tend to lean to one side of another, with their hips cooked out, men do this but rarely, they usually just plant both feet farther apart.

People watching is really helpful with this, I watch at my work a lot.

There are more differences in school, men ask more questions than women. They also usually participate more.

It comes down a lot to confidence, men usually have more confidence then women. This is a unfortunate part of our society,but it's true,

I love things like this :). Hope that some of this helps you.

Hmm, interesting, where I'm from men never participate in class and they never listen.

[ThaHoward]

How men walk and sit is due to bone structure.

[Emery.]

I've never seen the nod :P

As for swaggering, you just have to keep your hips on a stable track and not swing them, and spread your legs wider when you walk, sort of, two separate rails for the two legs, or something. Vertical legs. Bone structure? Not really. I can definitely walk "like a man" even though I have hella wide hips. It requires a bit of practice and getting used to, though. It's just more of putting emphasis on the hips in women, because it seems more attractive and seductive, I guess.

Sitting with legs spread.

Speaking in monotone and from midriff.

Standing straight to seem tall and wide-shouldered.

And rising your chin higher, looking a bit from under the lid instead of from under the eyebrow like a sweet cat. Some cats in boots to illustrate the difference ;)

feminine. Pleeeeeease..... Take care of meeeee.. *meow*

masculine - Imma boss here. Huh. Haha.

[LassieBee]

For the walking thing this helped a lot:

Women tend to take up less space when they walk, with their feet close together as if walking on an invisible line, causing the hips to sway. Men tend to walk slightly on each side of that invisible line, giving them more of a straight, swaggering walk that accents their hips less and takes up more space. A lot of guys also put their hands somewhere (in their pockets, holding something, etc).

[zabz]

Very generally, move slower. Typically 'female' movements are almost always faster than typically 'male' movements. Women move, men are still.

But more specifically, the big ones are voice, hands, walk, feet.

Men generally speak more monotonously than women, and typically slower. (Hormones helped a couple of my friends with this as they started talking very flat to hide their voice breaking.)

They don't talk with their hands so much, and when they do, the movements are much slower. Women's hands tend to make quite fluttery motions, men don't do that very much. They often keep their hands in their pockets too, so if you talk with your hands a lot like I used to, shove 'em in your pockets and keep them there until you break the habit! Things like tapping, fiddling with nails, generally fidgetty-ness isn't as common with men...unless you give office guys a desk toy or a ballpoint pen with a clicky release, then they never stop goddamn moving!

Walking is basically feet slightly wider apart, keep your back more stable/upright, don't let your hips sway as much. The knees shouldn't really be brushing each other the way women's knees tend to. I found packing majorly helped with that. Also men have a much longer stride than women, even when they're the same height. It's part of that whole 'women don't part their knees much' thang.

Feet -- when standing still, like waiting on the train platform, women tend to put their feet right next to each other, heels almost touching. Men stand a bit wider than that.

I've found forcing your body to play it like a guy gets you into the habit fastest, or the minute you stop thinking about it, you default back to feminine mannerisms. Like I kept crossing my legs over like a woman until I started packing my boxers, then it was uncomfortable and presto! I now habitually sit with my knees apart.

[LadyErzsebet]

Someone mentioned it already but the way you stand. I naturally stick my hip out a bit and lean all my weight on one leg when I'm standing still and this is a more feminine mannerism (grrr). When you're standing still, keep your weight evenly on both legs.

[Densoro]

For the walking thing this helped a lot:

Women tend to take up less space when they walk, with their feet close together as if walking on an invisible line, causing the hips to sway. Men tend to walk slightly on each side of that invisible line, giving them more of a straight, swaggering walk that accents their hips less and takes up more space. A lot of guys also put their hands somewhere (in their pockets, holding something, etc).

This is important and I've noticed it's a good general rule, too. Even with the same size bodies, men take up more space. They stand taller and broader. I read a thing saying that women turn their knees slightly inward, which leads to weird and damaging spinal curvature; men are turned outward instead. If they gesticulate, it's with the whole arm. This is why the stereotypically unmanly 'limp wrist' is thrown from the elbow, for contrast.

[jack616]

While all these tips are useful and fab, I'd say it's also good to try not to over stress too much on it. We're all human. I know many femme guys just like me and there is a lot of hand flailing. ^_^

The most useful tip for me was in general to 'just relax', like literally give yourself permission to splurge out and take up space. However that happens and however feels the most natural to you :) Good luck with it all!

[Densoro]

Definitely. Any attempt to define people by the binary is using constructs more than any innate nature. But if somebody wants to fit in with their group, I just figured I'd add two cents xD

[jack616]

Definitely. Any attempt to define people by the binary is using constructs more than any innate nature. But if somebody wants to fit in with their group, I just figured I'd add two cents xD

Sure thing! ^_^ I agree with you. And every tip in this thread is super helpful too. :)

[jack616]

If anyone hasn't seen this wee comic before, it's really cool and has a lovely message for this kind of topic ^_^

http://everydayfeminism.com/2015/09/its-not-a-race/

[Kappamaki]

Shoulders back, chest high, feet apart, head up, and strut!

[LassieBee]

Everyone's input is really useful and I'm very thankful that you gave the time to help me.

If anyone hasn't seen this wee comic before, it's really cool and has a lovely message for this kind of topic ^_^

http://everydayfeminism.com/2015/09/its-not-a-race/

That comic is lovely! Funnily enough I think it's exactly what I needed to see right now. I'm trying to take it a bit at a time - baby steps, as the comic said - but I have the urge to get it all over and done with.

[jack616]

Everyone's input is really useful and I'm very thankful that you gave the time to help me.

If anyone hasn't seen this wee comic before, it's really cool and has a lovely message for this kind of topic ^_^

http://everydayfeminism.com/2015/09/its-not-a-race/

That comic is lovely! Funnily enough I think it's exactly what I needed to see right now. I'm trying to take it a bit at a time - baby steps, as the comic said - but I have the urge to get it all over and done with.

Me too, mate. Me too. :3

We can but try! Take care X

(Ps I love the 'obvious express' panel. I lol at that all the time. It's too cute)

[Calligraphette_Coe]

...and watch the wrists! I know that's somewhat of a stereotype, but it is a factor. Also, cross your arms over your chest, not across your stomach. I'm AMAB, and I slip up on that a lot and it generates looks sometimes. Also, I tend to 'talk' waaaay to much with my hands.

One funny one, though? I tend to put a little too much modulation and expressiveness in my vocal patterns? Sometimes, I can get the guys I'm talking to to drop out of their usual monotone and start doing it, too. Hehehehehe. Which is really ironic since they REALLLY dislike listening to men like Malcolm Gladwell reading for his audio books-- they say he sounds gay or effeminate, yet I can coax them into the same patterns if it seems like I'm telling a story in a joking manner.

Never look another man in the eye for too long... just glance, acknowledge and then avert.

[jack616]

Never look another man in the eye for too long... just glance, acknowledge and then avert.

This rule of society just breaks my heart so much. :(

[Alex Fitzpatrick]

So, I looked into this thread because I need some tips myself, but I noticed a bit of a common note a lot of people are making that I can offer some advice/clarification on: The Swagger (TM). I don't know much as to the whole "territorial" and "taking up space" aspects, but a part of it is literally just anatomy as well. If you're AFAB, odds are there's not going to be certain equipment between your legs, and that gets coupled with being raised to walk (or generally do most things) with your legs closed/close together. However, if there *is* something between your legs, you're going to walk a bit differently, with a bit more 'openness' to your stance. I learned this when I started packing, actually. Certain types tend to sit a bit... Low. And it *will* change how you walk somewhat. Maybe it's just me, but I actually had no trouble developing The Swagger once I started packing (go a quarter century with nothing there, then suddenly there *is* something? Yep, your gait's gonna change). Picking up a more masculine walk with the help of a physical sensory input (like having a packer up against you) was a lot easier (literally took no thought, you just adapt to move more comfortably with the addition) than trying to teach yourself to walk just by the feel of your stride or watching how other people walk. I don't know if this is at all useful to anyone, but I've certainly been noticing a difference.