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The Asexual-Sexual Q&A Thread


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Dirty delete admin?  Good thing I took a screenshot.  It's cool.  I'll go above you if I need to.  Better that than be silenced, which is exactly what the problem is on this thread in the first place.

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The thread will remain in cool down for time being. It will be reopened but just no yet.

 

iff,

moderator, sexual partners, friends & allies

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Reopening thread

 

iff,

moderator, sexual partners, friends & allies

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5 minutes ago, Snao van der Cone said:

Question for sexual people: how often do you wash your sheets? 

Great lol while waiting for eye doc to tell me I’m getting old

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Ok I just needed to add as soon as I looked up an obstetrician was pulling like 10 tissues out of a box. My mind was a baaaaad boooy ha

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11 minutes ago, ryn2 said:

Is using towels if something is likely to make a mess an ace thing?  😂

I think it's a responsible adult thing. 

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I put down towels afterward... wet spots get chilly... but to be perfectly honest, I've never understood how people know where they're going to end up on the bed. Don't you migrate? I think once I get into it, the likelihood of thinking of a towel is slim to none. 

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7 minutes ago, skullery said:

I put down towels afterward... wet spots get chilly... but to be perfectly honest, I've never understood how people know where they're going to end up on the bed. Don't you migrate? I think once I get into it, the likelihood of thinking of a towel is slim to none. 

The towel worked for me the one time I used one (or rather the other person used one, as he knew what he was doing) but that's because I wasn't very animated that whole time. 😂

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Migrate? As an asexual all the mess, just yuck. Also as an ace yes I would have to shower before and after and brush teeth even if I tried to leave it as long as I could for the sake of feelings, i felt dirty afterwards.

 

I used to shower before so I was squeaky clean for my partner, although now I'm not so sure it would have mattered if i hadn't showered since the morning. 

 

Thats a question for sexuals.  I mean I am never going to have sex again. I am just curious.

 

Do you shower before sex?

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3 minutes ago, Snao van der Cone said:

I wasn't very animated that whole time. 😂

Seems like a towel requirement, so you did well. 😂

 

2 minutes ago, alibali said:

Do you shower before sex?

I don't shower before or after sex. 

 

My ex was big into showering beforehand and I feel like it gave me a bit of a complex about feeling dirty. 

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Maybe it's a straight thing, the staying still? I've always seen that in movies, just one person on top of the other, right in sleeping position on the bed... I don't really get it. Just assumed that was cinematic flair. 😂

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Huh. Interesting. Now I wanna know. 

 

Mixed gender couples... thoughts? Do you end up in weird positions and spots on the bed? Does the mattress stay in place? What's... how does the towel thing work? Do you have to try to stay on the towel? I HAVE QUESTIONS. 

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12 minutes ago, skullery said:

Maybe it's a straight thing, the staying still? I've always seen that in movies, just one person on top of the other, right in sleeping position on the bed... I don't really get it. Just assumed that was cinematic flair. 😂

I wouldn't be surprised. I don't think it's inherent to hetero sex, but the fact that it's presumed default in societies that have historically refused to ever talk about sex means that straight people start out with an oversimplified understanding of sexual intimacy and don't face as many challenges to it that force them to get creative. 

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Oh, another thing about the towel for me is that I was a bloody mess, so it was more important than other circumstances, I guess. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

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Oh, no, I was just menstruating. (love to use a word that will gross out more people 👌🏻) It wasn't really heavy anyway. I don't think any got on the towel. 

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14 minutes ago, Snao van der Cone said:

I wouldn't be surprised. I don't think it's inherent to hetero sex, but the fact that it's presumed default in societies that have historically refused to ever talk about sex means that straight people start out with an oversimplified understanding of sexual intimacy and don't face as many challenges to it that force them to get creative. 

In all seriousness, that sounds like a heavy burden, to have a humanity's worth of historical context to live up to and replicate. You're probs right... Knowing from the very beginning that you've gotta forge your own trail is probably liberating. Provides for more enjoyable options. 

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Just now, skullery said:

In all seriousness, that sounds like a heavy burden, to have a humanity's worth of historical context to live up to and replicate. You're probs right... Knowing from the very beginning that you've gotta forge your own trail is probably liberating. Provides for more enjoyable options. 

I wouldn't be surprised if I'm totally off on this, though, because I was overthinking the mechanics of sex and analyzing the cultural context of it far more than a heterosexual person should. This is another example of hindsight that I should've known I was asexual. 😂 I thought more about the political and moral symbolism of positions than the pleasure. 

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6 minutes ago, CBC said:

I've thought about that sort of thing a lot tbh, although... not really in the middle of sex.

I have definitely thought about it in the middle of sex. Won't get into storytelling mode here, though. 

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Well, when I wasn't really feeling into the sex itself, I wondered if it was a position thing, then my mind wandered to think of how diverse the female sexual experience is, and how many women really enjoy that position, or if I was somehow doing something wrong, or if this guy just wasn't very good. 

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3 minutes ago, CBC said:

All my experiences on the bottom were boring af.

Same, but top was no better. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Sex is extremely boring. 

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