FTM, Trans Masc, & Male Centered Folk

[C-3PO]

im transmasc as well! I prefer to not describe myself as either binary or non-binary, but I like the labels 'boy' and 'genderfluid'.

[jack616]

For anyone who's already started gender therapy, what exactly is the process? What do they talk to you about (besides the obvious gender issues)? I've just been referred for general therapy and gender is among that, and I don't know what to expect from it.

Where r u based? In England the process now is you can go to you GP and ask to be referred to the GIC of your choice (check the waiting lists!) And even if the GP is unaware you tell them yes that is correct, and they refer you. (No more need to be sent to a psychiatric assessment which doesn't do anything except also refer to the GIC, meh)

Then you go to the GIC and they discuss things with you, probably check your overall health if you are seeking treatment (blood tests are carried out by local GP tho) and everyone's journey is kinda different and that's okay.

Did that help? X

[jack616]

im transmasc as well! I prefer to not describe myself as either binary or non-binary, but I like the labels 'boy' and 'genderfluid'.

I like 'demi boy' ^_^

I found these pictures for gender, I love em

[jack616]

I know I'm writing about this all the time but let me write this again:

straight leg pants :)

They do wonders. They managed to slim down visually my 100cm-circumference hips.

And the way you walk and carry yourself.

Also:

http://ftmguide.rassaku.net/

Skip to clothes section. Conclusion from this guide: the right size.

Hehe, I'm writing a resource page about abndrogynous presentation :P It's empty right now, but I can throw in something some rambling that are going to be there but are still in my head.

I dunno if I count as transmasculine, since I'm more andro, neutral or "switches presentation according to direction of wind" if anything, but whatever :)

Thank you! ^_^

Shops like h&m usually do small sizes for short stops like me, but I haven't been brave enough to venture in yet!

Any shop suggestions?

Edit: I feel so awkward in regular trousers normally, it's so far removed from what I prefer. This is my struggle between finding 'passing' clothes that don't feel too... far removed from my personality. If that makes sense. I've never worn regular clothes unless it was a uniform, I think I've got that association in my head. :(

[Emery.]

TBH, I don't have any male clothing yet :P Hopefully I will when in a couple of years I won't have to deal with coming home every once in a while, and hence with parents' opinions.

I have very neutral looking female clothing, but I still manage to pull off androgyny with it. I shop in a very random manner and in Central Europe (I'm from there,but study in UK), so I don't think many things will be relevant to UK. I haven't seen many shops repeat, or be in the same numbers. It also depends what sort of style you want to pull of and how much money you want to spend. I've heard Superdry has small sizes, I think you can hunt in Vans... That's pretty much my knowledge. There was a whole thread in this subforum "Female bodied people who wear men's clothes share shopping experiences" or something like this, and some people gave very detailed advice. It's a long thread, don't give up in the beginning.

As for the regular fit, I'm amazed with it. I put on a couple of clothes with this fit, from the women's section, and then suddenly get a sir, a friend calling me handsome, and people openly trying to figure out my gender. Gosh. I'm so surprised I didn't find it earlier... I thought anything that doesn't hug me to the nearest cm makes me look fat... The funny thing is that I wasn't trying to pass, but fix my bad feelings on how I look. I always wanted to pull off the androgynous look, it has always had a certain appeal to me, purely aesthetic one. I strived for it very badly. Shrug. I must admit that I didn't ever have to wear a school uniform, though.

[Anthracite_Impreza]

For anyone who's already started gender therapy, what exactly is the process? What do they talk to you about (besides the obvious gender issues)? I've just been referred for general therapy and gender is among that, and I don't know what to expect from it.

Where r u based? In England the process now is you can go to you GP and ask to be referred to the GIC of your choice (check the waiting lists!) And even if the GP is unaware you tell them yes that is correct, and they refer you. (No more need to be sent to a psychiatric assessment which doesn't do anything except also refer to the GIC, meh)

Then you go to the GIC and they discuss things with you, probably check your overall health if you are seeking treatment (blood tests are carried out by local GP tho) and everyone's journey is kinda different and that's okay.

Did that help? X

It did help, but I can't do blood tests; they scare me too much :(

[jack616]

TBH, I don't have any male clothing yet :P Hopefully I will when in a couple of years I won't have to deal with coming home every once in a while, and hence with parents' opinions.

I have very neutral looking female clothing, but I still manage to pull off androgyny with it. I shop in a very random manner and in Central Europe (I'm from there,but study in UK), so I don't think many things will be relevant to UK. I haven't seen many shops repeat, or be in the same numbers. It also depends what sort of style you want to pull of and how much money you want to spend. I've heard Superdry has small sizes, I think you can hunt in Vans... That's pretty much my knowledge. There was a whole thread in this subforum "Female bodied people who wear men's clothes share shopping experiences" or something like this, and some people gave very detailed advice. It's a long thread, don't give up in the beginning.

As for the regular fit, I'm amazed with it. I put on a couple of clothes with this fit, from the women's section, and then suddenly get a sir, a friend calling me handsome, and people openly trying to figure out my gender. Gosh. I'm so surprised I didn't find it earlier... I thought anything that doesn't hug me to the nearest cm makes me look fat... The funny thing is that I wasn't trying to pass, but fix my bad feelings on how I look. I always wanted to pull off the androgynous look, it has always had a certain appeal to me, purely aesthetic one. I strived for it very badly. Shrug. I must admit that I didn't ever have to wear a school uniform, though.

Thanks for sharing this! ^_^

Can I ask how tall you are? I'm just curious. I think height is a major thing, shopping has always been a pain for me anyway regardless of what I needed lol :3

[jack616]

It did help, but I can't do blood tests; they scare me too much :(

I know hun :( it's the main thing I can't stand. But they'll only ask this (to be done with local GP) if you seek treatment like hormone therapy or surgery later on, it's just to check all is well.

If you're just at the talking and checking things out stage then try not to think about those tests, just focus on going to an appointment and chatting :) that's all it is.

I've heard rare reports of physicals being required but you can always say no to that. I've never been asked except to jump on the scale for my weight and height. Nothing scary :)

[Emery.]

Maybe. I'm 175cm tall. So, it's not unbelievable to meet a man of my size. Actually men of this size aren't that rare. But when it comes to sizing, my top is S/XS and bottom is an M. Coats are S/M. So I don't wear large sizes either. Especially tops.

Yeah, I avoid shopping as much as I can, it's a pain, I agree... I try to buy and go back home as quickly as possible, whatever the purchase is. Wait, shopping for food is cool :D

[dissolved]

For anyone who's already started gender therapy, what exactly is the process? What do they talk to you about (besides the obvious gender issues)? I've just been referred for general therapy and gender is among that, and I don't know what to expect from it.

Where r u based? In England the process now is you can go to you GP and ask to be referred to the GIC of your choice (check the waiting lists!) And even if the GP is unaware you tell them yes that is correct, and they refer you. (No more need to be sent to a psychiatric assessment which doesn't do anything except also refer to the GIC, meh)

Then you go to the GIC and they discuss things with you, probably check your overall health if you are seeking treatment (blood tests are carried out by local GP tho) and everyone's journey is kinda different and that's okay.

Did that help? X

It did help, but I can't do blood tests; they scare me too much :(

They need to check everything's ok with your current hormone levels, and if your body can actually handle hormone therapy. It's not exactly easy going -_-

There's often a clause in the clinic referral for a basic physical examination which isn't particularly intrusive, it's just to check you aren't intersex. I managed to avoid this because I'd already had smear tests and that was enough "proof" for them.

It ain't nice, but if you want anything from the gender clinic folks, it's necessary.

[jack616]

None of its great :(

<3

I've been to two different clinics in London and haven't had any physical yet (bar measuring height/weight)

I've had my blood tests tho, but no other physical.

Age may factor in there.

Edit: hey if anyone UK based has questions there's an amazing advice blog called UK FtM on tumblr they seem to know every medical and legal thing you ever need to know! :)

http://ukftm.tumblr.com

[jack616]

Maybe. I'm 175cm tall. So, it's not unbelievable to meet a man of my size. Actually men of this size aren't that rare. But when it comes to sizing, my top is S/XS and bottom is an M. Coats are S/M. So I don't wear large sizes either. Especially tops.

Yeah, I avoid shopping as much as I can, it's a pain, I agree... I try to buy and go back home as quickly as possible, whatever the purchase is. Wait, shopping for food is cool :D

Lol I keep having to convert cm via Google, I'm inches and feet ^_^

Ahh ur taller than me, I'm very short. The wideness sucks when being short and otherwise tiny all over. (I know it's hardly the worst thing to whinge about but getting clothes to fit is such a pain. Jacket to fit upper body but also close around hips? Hahaha forget it!)

I like h&m generally as it seems small person friendly lol. ^_^

Haha yeah definitely. Purchase, run home, try to calm down. X

[LadyErzsebet]

I'm transmasculine agender :D

I hate clothes shopping and haircuts and anything where I feel super reminded that people are looking at me and thinking I'm a girl, so I generally try to avoid both of those things (which is unfortunate, because I have short hair and I need to get it trimmed an awful lot more than I actually do).

Nice to meet you all.

[Ruqiah]

I don't have a label for my gender yet. All I know is that I'm AFAB, I don't care if male or female pronouns are used (but I feel happier with male), and I have no dysphoria. I don't wish to change my body itself, but I'm always on the hunt for good clothes that don't stink of feminimity. Tanks Emery for the trans link, I actually now know why people think I'm a lesbian xD. I love plaids, but I never knew it was associated with lesbians like that, so it's good to know.

If anyone has tips for male clothing, particularly button down shirts and nice pants, it would be helpful.~

[S.Kobold]

I have no label, and I don't think I really want one for my gender - but If gender were a spectrum I certainly feel more male than I (currently/naturally) look.

I wear womens' trousers because I've yet to find trousers in the guys section that can cope with my hips. I feel more comfortable in skinny jeans - so I guess I buck the trend on that.

Tops wise for a long time I used to wear fairly form fitting women's clothes - before I started examining how I felt about gender. This was because I kept being told that the men's/unisex shirts I wore made me look fat, which I was self conscious of at the time. (Granted, I was/am fat - so everything made me look fat). Recently I've started wearing men's shirts and button downs, which work much better with a compression vest/binder underneath. The change is slow however because I'm very short of money at the moment. For that reason I've shopped mostly in Primark.

I wear a large to cope with my chest - but I'm only 5ft5 (167cm) so I may encounter difficulty with certain types of clothing. We'll see!

For hair I go to a unisex Barber's - get charged gents prices because it's a gents haircut and takes that length of time. For those in Edinburgh - try Boombarbers.

Underwear wise I'd love to wear boxers or something similar, but I don't think they would be compatible with my women's cut skinny jeans.

I'm currently regularly seeing my GP about depression, and on a waiting list for psychiatry. I think I'm going to bring up the gender dysphoria issue at my next appointment, because I know how long the wait for a GIC appointment can be (only one clinic in Scotland) - but I'm worried it will be dismissed as a symptom of depression, or put off in some other way...

[jack616]

I don't have a label for my gender yet. All I know is that I'm AFAB, I don't care if male or female pronouns are used (but I feel happier with male), and I have no dysphoria. I don't wish to change my body itself, but I'm always on the hunt for good clothes that don't stink of feminimity. Tanks Emery for the trans link, I actually now know why people think I'm a lesbian xD. I love plaids, but I never knew it was associated with lesbians like that, so it's good to know.

If anyone has tips for male clothing, particularly button down shirts and nice pants, it would be helpful.~

Hi! ^_^

Oh I dunno. Everyone wears plaids now. All the moody doom rock boys I used to hang out with rocked the lumberjack look. I made a joke once that 3 of them must've gone shopping together cos they all wore similar plaid shirts and trucker caps. (They weren't amused.) Now I'm stealing their look just to be annoying. X

[jack616]

I have no label, and I don't think I really want one for my gender - but If gender were a spectrum I certainly feel more male than I (currently/naturally) look.

I wear womens' trousers because I've yet to find trousers in the guys section that can cope with my hips. I feel more comfortable in skinny jeans - so I guess I buck the trend on that.

Tops wise for a long time I used to wear fairly form fitting women's clothes - before I started examining how I felt about gender. This was because I kept being told that the men's/unisex shirts I wore made me look fat, which I was self conscious of at the time. (Granted, I was/am fat - so everything made me look fat). Recently I've started wearing men's shirts and button downs, which work much better with a compression vest/binder underneath. The change is slow however because I'm very short of money at the moment. For that reason I've shopped mostly in Primark.

I wear a large to cope with my chest - but I'm only 5ft5 (167cm) so I may encounter difficulty with certain types of clothing. We'll see!

For hair I go to a unisex Barber's - get charged gents prices because it's a gents haircut and takes that length of time. For those in Edinburgh - try Boombarbers.

Underwear wise I'd love to wear boxers or something similar, but I don't think they would be compatible with my women's cut skinny jeans.

I'm currently regularly seeing my GP about depression, and on a waiting list for psychiatry. I think I'm going to bring up the gender dysphoria issue at my next appointment, because I know how long the wait for a GIC appointment can be (only one clinic in Scotland) - but I'm worried it will be dismissed as a symptom of depression, or put off in some other way...

Thanks goodness for primark right?? What would I do without it I don't know!

You're way taller than me ^_^ I'm the same, small and chubby. I still think curves look good, that's my opinion. But it is a huge pain to dress from high street stores tho :( when all the clothes don't cater for varying sizes. on a limited budget too. I've always worn big sizes bc it fits better even tho all the ends are rolled up several times lol

An open shirt can disguise what's going on chest wise. That's my fave to wear, yay for autumn and winter! Think the tips are to avoid tight patterned tops, which shows stretches I guess. I always wear baggy anyway bc I wanted ppl to read my shirt print without it being distorted. Black tee with an open shirt in darker muted colours looks good, associated with more male.

Aw (hug) no there's literally no reason you should get denied referral to a GIC no matter what is going on! That's what they are there for, to discuss any gender issue with you. They want to help you. Yes by all means tell your GP to refer you if that's what you want. Yeah waiting lists are crap :( the GP can refer you directly (may help to bring the GP the contact details of your chosen GIC, as most GP's response is clueless to what to do) GP should refer you directly.

I know you're in Scotland but it might be worth checking if that's the only GIC you can visit, bc I thought it was only Wales who had 1 choice only. Everywhere else can choose a GIC. The blog UK FtM on tumblr will know. Do you want to ask them or I can for you? If u don't have a tumblr.

Either way, you can get a referral and know that's happening :) in the mean time have 'regular' (ie not gender specific) counselling and hopefully that will help a bit by the time you get to attend the GIC.

Sorry this is a long reply. Feel free to PM me if u ever want. I've had to have regular counselling too (referred locally by GP) for all the gender non specific issues. But these services, as soon as they hear the word 'gender' or 'trans' it's like they assume that's the only problem and it's not their place to deal with you. (Grr) I had to be very clear and very firm that other issues needed help too. Like regardless of anything gender I still want to deal with ocd issues, and I want a referral for that. (Just one example)

So don't let them sell you short. Get all the referrals you need and see other GPs if it'll be more helpful. Some are better than others! (Most still don't get it, it's like you have to spell out clearly, I want this referral and I want it now.)

Hope this helps x

[jack616]

Just checked and this is interesting for anyone in Scotland, apparently you can self refer to Sandyford GIC :) no need to talk to the GP!

Please check links on this blog

http://ukftm.tumblr.com

There is an info page about transitioning on the NHS in the UK (not sure how to link the exact page from my mobile, view on computer may be better)

[S.Kobold]

Thank you so much for such a supportive reply!

I've been working my way through that tumblr since seeing it referenced in this thread - it's a great resource!

I'm going to try bringing it up with the GP, she's commented on the changes I've made to my appearance since I started seeing her, so I don't think it will be coming entirely out of the blue. If I hit a brick wall with that, or if she tries to make life difficult I'll try a self referral.

It took quite a while to get a referral for a psychiatrist - so we'll see. And the waiting list for that is long, though no where need as long as for GICs!

One of my sister's is very handy with a sewing machine, and I'm out to all my family. When funds allow I hope to drag her out shopping with me and then get her to alter things so they don't look to wrong. Even if it's just hemming trousers - I think having the ability to change things to fit will be very helpful.

[Valiant]

Transmasculine, almost binary but not quite dude over here, so hi all.

Demiguy's the closest label I've found that sorta fits my gender. I started out identifying as nonbinary since I certainly couldn't have been binary trans and not noticed all this time (at almost 22, then), right? Turns out, I've been living under a rock, or well, my self awareness has. Damn thing's evolved since being exposed to the term gender identity, not that that's a bad thing. Spaghetti lord knows, I'm grateful for it. I'm still doubtful of being all the way binary, but I've got it narrowed down to about 70% binary, if I know anything of myself. Rest is hiding under a different rock, but if I had to hazard a guess, I'd say the rest is agender or neutral. Whatever it is, it likes to stay on the down low, making smoke signals from afar with a dodgy campfire to communicate. Tell ya what, those smoke signals were doing a pretty good job of causing major confusion when I first began walking the road to gender discovery. I stopped forcing the thing to come out and show itself, then the masculine part took the reigns. Glad someone's in control, wandering amidst a land of confusion wasn't fun, leaves you vulnerable to pickpockets and all that.

I guess it was blissful ignorance to begin with, followed by eventual acceptance. What made me begin thinking I was more transmasculine than anything else was identifying more with the experiences and stories of FTM guys on YouTube. I looked high and low through NB resources, but found very little in the way of identifying with the community. I kept going back to FTM vids, like a moth drawn to light. My conscious self kept enforcing that I couldn't be identifying with these guys because I didn't have half, or even a third of their "warning signs" during childhood, but then I relented on the knowledge that I can't remember most of mine, and what I do remember is to be taken with a bucketful of salt. One thing that kept me grounded, was knowing that I hadn't, in the past five odd years, felt anything like a girl or woman. Couldn't picture myself in the future as a woman, whether it be ten years on or one. I can't picture myself as a guy yet either (yay depression), but where there was dread and discomfort for the former, there's a sense of hope and anticipation for the latter. Twenty two years of being a tomboy didn't quite work out for me, so here's to at least another twenty two as a guy, in whatever capacity that may be.

My tank's currently running on fumes, so I'll probably be back tomorrow to share something a little more coherent. Here's some cake in the meantime:

Sorry I can't offer much in the way of advice or assistance M.Kobold, (looks like jack had that covered anyway ^_^), but I wish you all the best with approaching your doc about your gender dysphoria.

[jack616]

Thank you so much for such a supportive reply!

I've been working my way through that tumblr since seeing it referenced in this thread - it's a great resource!

I'm going to try bringing it up with the GP, she's commented on the changes I've made to my appearance since I started seeing her, so I don't think it will be coming entirely out of the blue. If I hit a brick wall with that, or if she tries to make life difficult I'll try a self referral.

It took quite a while to get a referral for a psychiatrist - so we'll see. And the waiting list for that is long, though no where need as long as for GICs!

One of my sister's is very handy with a sewing machine, and I'm out to all my family. When funds allow I hope to drag her out shopping with me and then get her to alter things so they don't look to wrong. Even if it's just hemming trousers - I think having the ability to change things to fit will be very helpful.

My pleasure! Glad the tumblr account is useful. They're like the Oracle for any ftm or related questions. While a GP may mean well, if they don't know what the next step is it can leave a patient floundering for no good reason. :( if you know the protocol before you even bring it up, at least you have information on your side. I hope she'll be helpful! Maybe you could check Sandyford's website and print off the relevant referral info to bring into your GP. I find waving paper at GP's can help them, esp if I don't feel like talking :3

It's a shame counselling wait times take so long :( is that the only resource available to you? I know you said psych. Is there no counselling options in the meantime for you? (GP should know)

There's some online or telephone services for free. X

I've been waiting for things too, it sucks. PM offer is always open btw! :)

Clothing adjustments help loads. Really do :)

[jack616]

I guess it was blissful ignorance to begin with, followed by eventual acceptance. What made me begin thinking I was more transmasculine than anything else was identifying more with the experiences and stories of FTM guys on YouTube. I looked high and low through NB resources, but found very little in the way of identifying with the community. I kept going back to FTM vids, like a moth drawn to light.

Can I give you a big hug? (Squishes) <3

Please come back to chat whenever you want to!

I feel ya, I'm the same. I never really feel like I fit in with groups, I've sat with very binary ftm groups and felt out of place, but also ditto afab nb groups. (Pleased to say I moved groups a bit and did meet some others who felt more 'me', and they're a bit nb male centered perhaps?)

Lol at the smoke signals, that's so true.

I don't think I was even a tomboy, I think I was trying so hard to fit the wrong mold I couldn't even relax enough for that. Hindered or aided by various jobs I had that required a very femme role, I don't know.

Changing more of my outward appearance has made me calmer and realise that being femme/camp/excitable is my personality, and that's okay. Ours personalities don't have to fit gender roles either :)

You're not alone is what I'm trying to say ^_^ take care x

[Qwerty321]

Maybe. I'm 175cm tall. So, it's not unbelievable to meet a man of my size. Actually men of this size aren't that rare. But when it comes to sizing, my top is S/XS and bottom is an M. Coats are S/M. So I don't wear large sizes either. Especially tops.

Yeah, I avoid shopping as much as I can, it's a pain, I agree... I try to buy and go back home as quickly as possible, whatever the purchase is. Wait, shopping for food is cool :D

I think that's a perfect height for a man :)

[Emery.]

Maybe. I'm 175cm tall. So, it's not unbelievable to meet a man of my size. Actually men of this size aren't that rare. But when it comes to sizing, my top is S/XS and bottom is an M. Coats are S/M. So I don't wear large sizes either. Especially tops.

Yeah, I avoid shopping as much as I can, it's a pain, I agree... I try to buy and go back home as quickly as possible, whatever the purchase is. Wait, shopping for food is cool :D

Lol I keep having to convert cm via Google, I'm inches and feet ^_^

Ahh ur taller than me, I'm very short. The wideness sucks when being short and otherwise tiny all over. (I know it's hardly the worst thing to whinge about but getting clothes to fit is such a pain. Jacket to fit upper body but also close around hips? Hahaha forget it!)

I like h&m generally as it seems small person friendly lol. ^_^

Haha yeah definitely. Purchase, run home, try to calm down. X

I can reassure you that for me shopping is no easy either, but clothing doesn't fit in different ways. For example, from women's (sic!) section: not having enough space for my breasts in a top, because if I'm small in my waist and shoulders, I must be wafer-thin all over (?), or jackets/hoodies/etc that don't account for hips below waist and will fit in general, but the bottom part will be ridiculously tight/stretched or won't zip/button, or the same with either lacking space for bottom curves in women's (!) trousers. Or the trosers are just way too big if they fit in that one area. It's women's section after all... I don't get it.

I had quite a lot of stuff form h&m too. (everything women's, of course) Some sweaters, always a lot of tops from there. I like the basic collection very much. I have a suit from h&m ^_^ I can't squeeze into their trousers, though. I buy pretty classic jeans usually: Levi's, Lee, Wrangler... I'm a jeans person. They have a wide variety of fits and colours, so there's always something you can find for yourself ^_^ The "go, buy, go back" strategy works very well with them. Quality is good, so the price paid is worth it. They don't fall apart quickly, so you don't need many of them. Material is nice. And the atmosphere of the shops isn't too overwhelming, more chilled (e.g. I find many chain stores like Zara overwhelming, too much about adornment).

[Emery.]

Maybe. I'm 175cm tall. So, it's not unbelievable to meet a man of my size. Actually men of this size aren't that rare. But when it comes to sizing, my top is S/XS and bottom is an M. Coats are S/M. So I don't wear large sizes either. Especially tops.

Yeah, I avoid shopping as much as I can, it's a pain, I agree... I try to buy and go back home as quickly as possible, whatever the purchase is. Wait, shopping for food is cool :D

I think that's a perfect height for a man :)

Yeah, height is veeeery dependant on ethnicity. I'm taller than many of my guy friends who come from e.g. India, China or Southern Europe, as well as some British guys. In Eastern Europe, though, 175cm is somewhat tall for a woman and somewhat short for a man. Guys 20+ are usually about 180-185cm or taller, and girls are about 165-170cm. Of my age, of course, because my generation is quite tall compared to e.g. people who are middle-aged. Under communism nutrition was a bit worse. I think 175cm is somewhere around average for a middle-aged man there, but not that tall for a girl either.

[Emery.]

I don't think I was even a tomboy, I think I was trying so hard to fit the wrong mold I couldn't even relax enough for that. Hindered or aided by various jobs I had that required a very femme role, I don't know.

This.^^

Changing more of my outward appearance has made me calmer and realise that being femme/camp/excitable is my personality, and that's okay. Ours personalities don't have to fit gender roles either :)

I have a personality 70% of Tony Stark (yes, the Iron Man ) and 30% something more sensitive and artsy. This, fortunately, doesn't mean I need to transition to be myself :P Or that I will lose my, y'know, masculinity ;), through wearing femme things. That's why I choose avatars being action heroines. That's what I identify with most. Strong ladies who have all qualities of Tony and additionally can pull off both a sexy dress, lipstick, beutiful jewelry, and will put on their armors (etc) and be basically the same as the guys around them yet still female phisically.

[Qwerty321]

Maybe. I'm 175cm tall. So, it's not unbelievable to meet a man of my size. Actually men of this size aren't that rare. But when it comes to sizing, my top is S/XS and bottom is an M. Coats are S/M. So I don't wear large sizes either. Especially tops.

Yeah, I avoid shopping as much as I can, it's a pain, I agree... I try to buy and go back home as quickly as possible, whatever the purchase is. Wait, shopping for food is cool :D

I think that's a perfect height for a man :)

Yeah, height is veeeery dependant on ethnicity. I'm taller than many of my guy friends who come from e.g. India, China or Southern Europe, as well as some British guys. In Eastern Europe, though, 175cm is somewhat tall for a woman and somewhat short for a man. Guys 20+ are usually about 180-185cm or taller, and girls are about 165-170cm. Of my age, of course, because my generation is quite tall compared to e.g. people who are middle-aged. Under communism nutrition was a bit worse. I think 175cm is somewhere around average for a middle-aged man there, but not that tall for a girl either.

I'm about 172-173 cm, I'm a middle-aged female from Russia (I'm 34). I'm unsure about "average" man's height of my country/generation, hard to say. My individual preferences of men is about my own height. I feel kinda discomfort with people who are much taller than me.

[jack616]

Did I miss a memo about 30s being the new middle age??? 0___o I wasn't even planning to use that term for myself for another decade at least! ^_^

Especially when I still get ID'd, lol

[jack616]

Forum keeps crashing on me tonight. :/

Touching back on clothing, would anyone like to share their ideal outfits or aesthetic?

Me, I think I would've been quite happy as a cavalier type ^_^

16th or 17th century is my fave. I loved Larping in medieval clothes for men.

All for one and one for all :)

[jack616]