Community for Fictoromantics?

[MarieIsEatingTacobell]

Hi there! I'm back again with another Fict thread.

Fictoromantic- Someone who is romantically attracted to fictional characters.

With the last thread that I posted in search of other people like me, who fall in love with fict characters, I actually got a lot of great responses from a lot of you who have felt exactly, or at least somewhat like I do before. A lot more then I thought to be honest with you. Especially considering I have spent the better part of the last year and a half searching desperately for some kind of group somewhere of other fictoromantics.

Now that I know that there are actually a few of you guys here, I wanted to keep the conversation going. There are so many feelings and things I go through that only other ficts would understand with no way of communicating any of it! Not to mention, there are so many different ways that I've seen you guys describe how you connect with or feel close to someone you have feelings for, that I think it'd make for a very diverse community.

Is there any specific places out there for ficts to go to? Any communities I've missed? Or maybe, should we start one here? That'd be amazing, I think!

In any case, thanks in advanced for the input. Feel free to direct message me as well if you don't feel comfortable publicly posting.

[Guest]

As I've never been into fictional character I don't know. Maybe there are any Facebook groups or any Tumblr blogs. I'm not sure. I think you should try there first.

[Guest]

I am so fictoromantic that I have to be careful what I read, because I can get hopelessly drawn in and a little obsessed, for a long time D: I have never felt for meat people what I feel for fictional characters (the depths of emotion I can achieve with fictional chars is nothing like anything I feel outside of a fictional world) .. But I don't know of any communities where fictoromantics can meet and share experiences etc (I think many of us are extremely antisocial, which doesn't help) :p heh.

[Guest]

As I know there are also many fictoromantics/fictosexuals on manga and anime forums.

[SithLord]

It depends on the fandom, because we mostly separate based on which universe/character we're crushing/more on and to what extent our feelings go.

Like when I'm majorly crushing on Shizuo and Izaya from Durarara!!, I just go to Durarara!! sites or forums. I'm not kidding when I say sites. There's an entire Dollars site that I'd be on if I could read Japanese better. Tumblr also used to have a bunch of stuff, but because I don't have an account it's weirder to get to.

But since I like writing my romantic fantasies out (whether I ship them with someone else or me), I just stay in my room and live in my head. Fanfiction.net is good for that, and it has a lot of like-minded people, but most won't identify as ficto, just say they have crushes on the characters. Also because that site doesn't like stories in 2nd person or reader-insert stories, the romantic fantasies that ship a certain character with the author are mostly in first person and pretty obviously author-inserts that are irritating if you can't relate.

[Robin L]

I'm pretty sure the fandom community of whatever you're into will have similar experiences, thought they might not use the term specifically.

Personally I'm only sexually and romantically attracted to non-human fictional characters, but that's beyond the point.

[MarieIsEatingTacobell]

As I've never been into fictional character I don't know. Maybe there are any Facebook groups or any Tumblr blogs. I'm not sure. I think you should try there first.

Tumblr was my first stop, actually. Much to my surprise, I only found about 3 blogs and they're all inactive unfortunately. You'd think tumblr of all places would have a bigger community of ficts behind it, but unless they're calling themselves something else, I guess not.

I am so fictoromantic that I have to be careful what I read, because I can get hopelessly drawn in and a little obsessed, for a long time D: I have never felt for meat people what I feel for fictional characters (the depths of emotion I can achieve with fictional chars is nothing like anything I feel outside of a fictional world) .. But I don't know of any communities where fictoromantics can meet and share experiences etc (I think many of us are extremely antisocial, which doesn't help) :P heh.

I've been in love with the same fict for 4 years now, so I feel you! I mean I have other fict crushes here and there and even thought for a second that I had fallen in love with another fict but- nope. He's still got my heart. I actually haven't felt for meat people since my teen years and it doesn't look like that's changing anytime soon. Romantic affection from meat people skeeves me out. Hrm.. well that's probably all the more reason for me to try to connect with you guys here!

It depends on the fandom, because we mostly separate based on which universe/character we're crushing/more on and to what extent our feelings go.

Like when I'm majorly crushing on Shizuo and Izaya from Durarara!!, I just go to Durarara!! sites or forums. I'm not kidding when I say sites. There's an entire Dollars site that I'd be on if I could read Japanese better. Tumblr also used to have a bunch of stuff, but because I don't have an account it's weirder to get to.

But since I like writing my romantic fantasies out (whether I ship them with someone else or me), I just stay in my room and live in my head. Fanfiction.net is good for that, and it has a lot of like-minded people, but most won't identify as ficto, just say they have crushes on the characters. Also because that site doesn't like stories in 2nd person or reader-insert stories, the romantic fantasies that ship a certain character with the author are mostly in first person and pretty obviously author-inserts that are irritating if you can't relate.

Awh, if we're divided by fandom that's going to be an issue for me. The fandom isn't exactly the most understanding or pleasant group of people. Plus to top it off my partner is one of, if not THE most hated characters in the community. Ugh.

Oh I've never tried there, mostly because I can't write worth a squat :P but I'll definitely lurk and see what I can find.

I'm pretty sure the fandom community of whatever you're into will have similar experiences, thought they might not use the term specifically.

Personally I'm only sexually and romantically attracted to non-human fictional characters, but that's beyond the point.

Eh, like I said above, the fandom isn't exactly the best and my partner is almost universally loathed, unfortunately. I interact with the fandom in form of reblogs on tumblr and talking to the a few of the nice members I've found, and the even fewer fans of my partner, but that's about it. I always try to find more like minded people in the fandom, but it seldom works out. Just my luck I suppose!

I actually speak to someone who's also exclusively attracted to non human ficts. Being that my partners have all been human, and that my current partner is from a very serious series while hers is from a playful cartoon, we have a lot of differences but- we can still relate on a lot. You'd think we wouldn't, but we do! That's why I've been searching for people in more of a general sense then just in my fandom. That's aside from my other reasons

[Guest]

It depends on the fandom, because we mostly separate based on which universe/character we're crushing/more on and to what extent our feelings go.

Like when I'm majorly crushing on Shizuo and Izaya from Durarara!!, I just go to Durarara!! sites or forums. I'm not kidding when I say sites. There's an entire Dollars site that I'd be on if I could read Japanese better. Tumblr also used to have a bunch of stuff, but because I don't have an account it's weirder to get to.

But since I like writing my romantic fantasies out (whether I ship them with someone else or me), I just stay in my room and live in my head. Fanfiction.net is good for that, and it has a lot of like-minded people, but most won't identify as ficto, just say they have crushes on the characters. Also because that site doesn't like stories in 2nd person or reader-insert stories, the romantic fantasies that ship a certain character with the author are mostly in first person and pretty obviously author-inserts that are irritating if you can't relate.

My last serious fictoromantic attraction (by serious I mean, not a crush, and relatively long term) was for Sandor Clegane from the Song of Ice and Fire series. There are heaps of Sandor fandoms out there, hundreds (thousands lol) of fanfics etc, but it always seems to be gushy, crushing teens who don't seem to know him very well and haven't interpreted his true character or motivations accurately. Why would I want to associate with a massive group of girls who all ''crush'' on the person I love, but seem to have no comprehension of his true identity? I spent a long time searching different fandoms for him and different fanfic sites and things, and realized that nope, I'm way better off alone (in my room, in my head, as you put it) in this one haha. I don't know how many other fictoromantics feel the same about their loves?

So yeah, in my experience, associating with fandoms if nothing like speaking to another fictoromantic. You can discuss the nature of your love and attractions to if you are discussing general fictoromanticism, and are always on the same page.. Instead of just discussing the object of your love with someone who doesn't seem to understand the person you love as well as you do, but claims to ''crush hard'' on him, like you get with people in fandoms.. if that makes sense? Maybe I am just really generalizing fandoms etc.. But it just doesn't seem the same to me.

[MarieIsEatingTacobell]

My last serious fictoromantic attraction (by serious I mean, not a crush, and relatively long term) was for Sandor Clegane from the Song of Ice and Fire series. There are heaps of Sandor fandoms out there, hundreds (thousands lol) of fanfics etc, but it always seems to be gushy, crushing teens who don't seem to know him very well and haven't interpreted his true character or motivations accurately. Why would I want to associate with a massive group of girls who all ''crush'' on the person I love, but seem to have no comprehension of his true identity? I spent a long time searching different fandoms for him and different fanfic sites and things, and realized that nope, I'm way better off alone (in my room, in my head, as you put it) in this one haha. I don't know how many other fictoromantics feel the same about their loves?

So yeah, in my experience, associating with fandoms if nothing like speaking to another fictoromantic. You can discuss the nature of your love and attractions to if you are discussing general fictoromanticism, and are always on the same page.. Instead of just discussing the object of your love with someone who doesn't seem to understand the person you love as well as you do, but claims to ''crush hard'' on him, like you get with people in fandoms.. if that makes sense? Maybe I am just really generalizing fandoms etc.. But it just doesn't seem the same to me.

YES. The few other people I've found that are fans of my partner do the crush thing. "He's so hot omg what a babe oh my gosh cinnamon roll" and just- that's fine but that's not what how I feel. I love him, and so- I can't relate to them. The entire point of my search is to find people I relate to. I try reading fan fictions and such that the fandom writes, but oh my god. It's so legitimately frustrating because the vast majority of the fandom doesn't, nor do they care to actually understand him. As a result, they tend to write him completely out of character and it drives me nuts. There's a writer I've befriended that actually writes him great, but she's not a fict. She just really likes him and the actor who plays him, so I can't really talk to her about my feelings. So all in all, the fandom is just not a good place for me to look for like minded people.

I've tried confiding in someone from the same fandom when I separated from my current partner and was attached to someone else from a different fandom all together. Like, genuinely confided in them to what extent I felt for fictional characters, and it didn't go very well. She tried being understanding, but at the end of the day she told me it's because these people seem "perfect" compared to meat people and I just haven't met the right person yet. (Just that she suggested my partner was "perfect"... LOL wow no- jesus.. no) and this was someone who does the "crushing" and "gushing" thing. Everything is dandy until you say "Omg i love this character so much... no, really. I'm in love with them." then all understanding is lost.

I don't even need to find someone who loves my partner specifically, just someone who gets it. You seem to get it.

[kawaii demigod]

Hey! I think I'm fictoromantic too... I've had feelings towards Twilight Sparkle. (Well her in human form) for at least a year. Oops. I'm glad to see I'm Not alone!

[Nyctale]

I'm kinda fictoromantic, but I'm an aromantic with a very strong maternal instinct, that I used to think was romantic love.

I just want to nurture anyone that goes through hard times or show this sort of... fragility and humility, but who still can smile even though everything goes against them.

And I've seen those aspects mostly in fictional characters *points at Yato (Noragami)*. When I met those aspects in someone in real life, I often stop loving them when I realize that won't do anything to help themselves.

[Desmister]

I'm definitely a fictoromantic too! There's a connection I feel with fictional characters that I've never come close to feeling with real people. Fict crushes are so much easier to deal with than crushes on real people.

[MarieIsEatingTacobell]

Okay guys, for anyone with a tumblr who might be interested, I've teamed up with a friend of mine who's also fictoromantic to make a support blog for people like us. You can find it at loveforficts.tumblr.com ! I figured since there was no clear community to go to, that we'd try our hand at our own!

[Guest]

The blog sounds cool. I think it's great you created such place for fictiosexual people! Have you considered running fictosexual meetups? It also would be a great idea. If I were you I'd also run a Facebook fan page. It's a pity there are not such places for people who have crushes on historical figures :(

[DeannaRicker]

I am so fictoromantic that I have to be careful what I read, because I can get hopelessly drawn in and a little obsessed, for a long time D: I have never felt for meat people what I feel for fictional characters (the depths of emotion I can achieve with fictional chars is nothing like anything I feel outside of a fictional world) .. But I don't know of any communities where fictoromantics can meet and share experiences etc (I think many of us are extremely antisocial, which doesn't help) :P heh.

^^^^OMG yes....I didn't know I wasn't the only one who could get obsessive. I had to cut myself off from a char...which was so hard, in order to function in the real world. I'm careful what I read, and watch for the same reasons.

[DeannaRicker]

The blog sounds cool. I think it's great you created such place for fictiosexual people! Have you considered running fictosexual meetups? It also would be a great idea. If I were you I'd also run a Facebook fan page. It's a pity there are not such places for people who have crushes on historical figures :(

What do you mean by historical figures?

[Guest]

The blog sounds cool. I think it's great you created such place for fictiosexual people! Have you considered running fictosexual meetups? It also would be a great idea. If I were you I'd also run a Facebook fan page. It's a pity there are not such places for people who have crushes on historical figures :(

What do you mean by historical figures?

I meant people who have crushes on historical figures :)

[Guest]

I am so fictoromantic that I have to be careful what I read, because I can get hopelessly drawn in and a little obsessed, for a long time D: I have never felt for meat people what I feel for fictional characters (the depths of emotion I can achieve with fictional chars is nothing like anything I feel outside of a fictional world) .. But I don't know of any communities where fictoromantics can meet and share experiences etc (I think many of us are extremely antisocial, which doesn't help) :P heh.

^^^^OMG yes....I didn't know I wasn't the only one who could get obsessive. I had to cut myself off from a char...which was so hard, in order to function in the real world. I'm careful what I read, and watch for the same reasons.

So, Deanna, have you tried to read non-fiction or watch documentaries?

[DeannaRicker]

I am so fictoromantic that I have to be careful what I read, because I can get hopelessly drawn in and a little obsessed, for a long time D: I have never felt for meat people what I feel for fictional characters (the depths of emotion I can achieve with fictional chars is nothing like anything I feel outside of a fictional world) .. But I don't know of any communities where fictoromantics can meet and share experiences etc (I think many of us are extremely antisocial, which doesn't help) :P heh.

^^^^OMG yes....I didn't know I wasn't the only one who could get obsessive. I had to cut myself off from a char...which was so hard, in order to function in the real world. I'm careful what I read, and watch for the same reasons.

So, Deanna, have you tried to read non-fiction or watch documentaries?

I don't read non-fiction, but I love documentaries. I watch them all the time.

[Guest]

I am so fictoromantic that I have to be careful what I read, because I can get hopelessly drawn in and a little obsessed, for a long time D: I have never felt for meat people what I feel for fictional characters (the depths of emotion I can achieve with fictional chars is nothing like anything I feel outside of a fictional world) .. But I don't know of any communities where fictoromantics can meet and share experiences etc (I think many of us are extremely antisocial, which doesn't help) :P heh.

^^^^OMG yes....I didn't know I wasn't the only one who could get obsessive. I had to cut myself off from a char...which was so hard, in order to function in the real world. I'm careful what I read, and watch for the same reasons.

So, Deanna, have you tried to read non-fiction or watch documentaries?

I don't read non-fiction, but I love documentaries. I watch them all the time.

Non-fiction books are cool, especially true stories, biographies and report books.

[Semtex in August]

Yes!!! I totally fall in love with fictional characters starting with comic books and then novels. Good god many times when I am finishing an excellent book. I get so sad because a certain character is about to break up with me and disappear forever. :(

Totally more vital to my life than any real life human being.

[malica]

(Totally necro'ing this thread)

Okay guys, for anyone with a tumblr who might be interested, I've teamed up with a friend of mine who's also fictoromantic to make a support blog for people like us. You can find it at loveforficts.tumblr.com ! I figured since there was no clear community to go to, that we'd try our hand at our own!

Oh wow, nice.

I used to run a fictoromantic ("waifu") community on reddit, but got driven out after coming out as polyamorous... Like loving one fictional girl was wonderful but loving two fictional girls was heresy.

[ChillaKilla]

(Totally necro'ing this thread)

Okay guys, for anyone with a tumblr who might be interested, I've teamed up with a friend of mine who's also fictoromantic to make a support blog for people like us. You can find it at loveforficts.tumblr.com ! I figured since there was no clear community to go to, that we'd try our hand at our own!

Oh wow, nice.

I used to run a fictoromantic ("waifu") community on reddit, but got driven out after coming out as polyamorous... Like loving one fictional girl was wonderful but loving two fictional girls was heresy.

That's awfully rich coming from a community that most people would consider just as unusual as polyamory, if not more :P hypocrisy FTW

[Mimikyu Senpai]

On 2/29/2016 at 4:58 PM, malica said:

(Totally necro'ing this thread)

Oh wow, nice.

I used to run a fictoromantic ("waifu") community on reddit, but got driven out after coming out as polyamorous... Like loving one fictional girl was wonderful but loving two fictional girls was heresy.

I used to lurk on that community for a couple of years, so I actually recognize you.  (You don't know me though because I never actually posted anything, so yeah...) I really don't like the direction that that community has gone ever since you left... The rules for what does and doesn't count as a "waifu" to them are ridiculously strict and convoluted now. The last time I ever lurked there, there was a new rule that members weren't even allowed to headcanon anymore. I felt really disappointed because I didn't know where else to go or who to turn to when it came to seeking reassurance about my fictoromantic "feels". 

[Malini]

As I tend to spend more time in other worlds, I was unaware that there are so many people like me, who love "fictional" characters. But as my heart was full with love for my soulbond "fictional" beloved villain husband, I googled "relationship with a fictional character", and... here I am! And very happy to be here, too. I'm a very sensitive person, and I'm generally hurt by the discrimination towards fictoromantics in mainstream society. So after getting hurt because of being sincere, I am so happy to find like-minded people.

As for fandoms, they can be very good for communication, or not so good. My husband's canon's fandom is literally unexistent, and you don't know him unless maybe you are Indian and/or love retro Bollywood films. However, I sometimes feel happy because of it cause I enjoy the anonymity. Some of my soulbonds are or were very well-known characters from very well-known fandoms... and as I always love the villains, there is always much hate for them. I feel hurt even reading hate posts about my loved ones, and I've been kicked out of fandom groups for defending villainous fictives.

[Guest Deus Ex Infinity]

I don't think, that there's anything like an active fictoromantic community out there atm but it's never too late to get one started IF there's one - I'm certainly gonna be part of it! Just dip me into chocolate & cake and throw me into it 

[SamwiseLovesLife]

I'm curious, are you all similar ages or varied? I only ask because I and others I know who were romantically drawn to fictional characters essentially grew out of it when I/we got to be adults, but is that the same for you or are you older and still have these feelings?

[Guest]

8 hours ago, SamwiseLovesLife said:

I'm curious, are you all similar ages or varied? I only ask because I and others I know who were romantically drawn to fictional characters essentially grew out of it when I/we got to be adults, but is that the same for you or are you older and still have these feelings?

I'm 30 and still have crushes on historical figures.

[Araminta]

On 15/06/2017 at 10:50 AM, SamwiseLovesLife said:

I'm curious, are you all similar ages or varied? I only ask because I and others I know who were romantically drawn to fictional characters essentially grew out of it when I/we got to be adults, but is that the same for you or are you older and still have these feelings?

 

 

 

I didn't know fictoromanticism existed as an orientation so I'm not even sure I see myself as fictoromantic, but I'm going to answer because I do have romantic feelings for fictional characters.

As a teenager, I used to crush on fictional characters a lot. Then, when I was 20, I thought I had outgrown it. However, last year I crushed hard on several characters, and I still have strong feelings for one of them. I'm 24.

 

I do have crushes on real persons (I have one right now, but I don't think it will ever work out for a number of reasons), and I have already been in several relationships.

[.diva plavalaguna.]

Hm. I'm 26 and I've been in love with the same character for the past 11 years so....not growing out of it, I guess lol.

 

I'm honestly afraid to delve into the fandoms surrounding my ficts (is that the term?). Precisely for reasons mentioned above...I don't feel like I would get along with them. And I don't even like when I see some of the...alternative...fan art of my guy. It's actually disturbing because I don't know why you'd do that to him if you like him so much... Ugh. Aside from that, I'm just as possessive of my fictional guys as I am with IRL ones (mentally). I think I just don't want to listen to others gush over them lol.