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The 2015 Ace Community Census


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Dunnit d(`-`d)

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I've done it! Can't wait to see the results in the future. :D

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Completed the survey! I look forward to the results.

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Done!

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I took the survey but I must point out that "gay" and "lesbian" are not necessarily sexual orientations and are not necessarily "homosexual", which I believe is what you were trying to get at. Wording on stuff like this is very important. You can be both gay and asexual since the term gay doesn't in and of itself specify the type of attraction involved. Just because it's been linked to homosexuality doesn't mean they're the same thing, it just means historically sexual and romantic orientations were considered the same thing.

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I was unsure how to answer on the social pressure from other people one. I've never specifically, personally, or directly been pressured. There's just the general expectation.

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Possible TMI

I didn't like the way they linked having a high libido with having a ''high drive for partnered sexual gratification or solo satisfaction'' as though 1) masturbation and partnered sex are two sides of the same coin, they are not at all and 2) as though having a high libido means you have a high drive to seek sexual gratification one way or another.

I have a high libido (abundant levels of 'sex hormones' due to being a very healthy person) and this causes me to become aroused often for reasons I have no control over (I might just be doing the dishes or watching a crime drama, any random activity) and I need to masturbate to get rid of arousal as it doesn't go away on it's own and can get very annoying. If I didn't get aroused, I wouldn't bother trying to make myself aroused to experience pleasure or anything, bah, what a waste of time!

There are many, many people in the asexual community, men and women, who experience this. We don't have a ''high drive to seek sexual pleasure from ourselves'' just because we masturbate, we just have healthy hormone levels and need to get rid of arousal. No different than urinating to get rid of the feeling of needing to urinate. It's a bodily function, nothing more nothing less, and we have no desire/preference to include another person in our libido-release (because if we did, we wouldn't be asexual)

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I didn't like the way they linked having a high libido with having a ''high drive for partnered sexual gratification or solo satisfaction'' as though 1) masturbation and partnered sex are two sides of the same coin, they are not at all and 2) as though having a high libido means you have a high drive to seek sexual gratification one way or another.

Is orgasm not "sexual gratification? That is what links partnered sex and masturbation.

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Possible TMI

I didn't like the way they linked having a high libido with having a ''high drive for partnered sexual gratification or solo satisfaction'' as though 1) masturbation and partnered sex are two sides of the same coin, they are not at all and 2) as though having a high libido means you have a high drive to seek sexual gratification one way or another.

Is orgasm not "sexual gratification? That is what links partnered sex and masturbation.

I have a high libido (an abundance of sex hormones) yet have no desire for partnered sex. Someone else (a sexual person) may have a high libido and also desire partnered sex. It should have been two separate questions, instead of lumping it all into one.

And no, to someone like me, an orgasm is release of the tension of genital arousal brought on by hormones, no different than pissing to relieve a full bladder. I only piss when my bladder is full, and I don't do it for pleasure. That's what orgasm is to me (and plenty of others here).. To someone else (a far greater majority of people) an orgasm and the stimulation that leads to orgasm, is a pleasurable sexual experience, so they masturbate (or seek partnered sex) for that sexual gratification/pleasure. They will often even actively attempt to achieve arousal through direct genital stimulation (and stimulation of other erogenous zones) and/or watching porn or reading erotica, for example, so they can experience sexual pleasure and gratification through the pleasurable sensations of sexual stimulation and orgasm.

So no, my high libido is NOT a desire for sexual gratification through orgasm (the questionnaire suggests that a high libido and a desire for sexual satisfaction are one and the same thing) my libido it is merely an abundance of hormones that cause me to become aroused often for no reason. As arousal can be very annoying and uncomfortable, and for me does not go away on its own, I have no choice but to deal with it through masturbation. I do not masturbate to seek or achieve pleasure, only to get rid of arousal, which is something I find very annoying and a total waste of time (just like having to rush to the loo to piss when I am trying to watch a movie - endlessly frustrating, yet unavoidable).

There are enough people who experience arousal, masturbation, and orgasm in the same way that I do (as a bodily function we would prefer not to experience, as opposed to a pleasurable, gratifying activity that we actively seek) that I am validated in my dislike of that particular question.

Have I explained the difference clearly enough yet?

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Perissodactyla

Have I explained the difference clearly enough yet?

@PanFicto: I'm So happy you're Back.

Soon after I joined AVEN in April, you were the first person who I was truly inspired by.

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Possible TMI

I didn't like the way they linked having a high libido with having a ''high drive for partnered sexual gratification or solo satisfaction'' as though 1) masturbation and partnered sex are two sides of the same coin, they are not at all and 2) as though having a high libido means you have a high drive to seek sexual gratification one way or another.

Is orgasm not "sexual gratification? That is what links partnered sex and masturbation.

I have a high libido (an abundance of sex hormones) yet have no desire for partnered sex. Someone else (a sexual person) may have a high libido and also desire partnered sex. It should have been two separate questions, instead of lumping it all into one.

And no, to someone like me, an orgasm is release of the tension of genital arousal brought on by hormones, no different than pissing to relieve a full bladder. I only piss when my bladder is full, and I don't do it for pleasure. That's what orgasm is to me (and plenty of others here).. To someone else (a far greater majority of people) an orgasm and the stimulation that leads to orgasm, is a pleasurable sexual experience, so they masturbate (or seek partnered sex) for that sexual gratification/pleasure. They will often even actively attempt to achieve arousal through direct genital stimulation (and stimulation of other erogenous zones) and/or watching porn or reading erotica, for example, so they can experience sexual pleasure and gratification through the pleasurable sensations of sexual stimulation and orgasm.

So no, my high libido is NOT a desire for sexual gratification through orgasm (the questionnaire suggests that a high libido and a desire for sexual satisfaction are one and the same thing) my libido it is merely an abundance of hormones that cause me to become aroused often for no reason. As arousal can be very annoying and uncomfortable, and for me does not go away on its own, I have no choice but to deal with it through masturbation. I do not masturbate to seek or achieve pleasure, only to get rid of arousal, which is something I find very annoying and a total waste of time (just like having to rush to the loo to piss when I am trying to watch a movie - endlessly frustrating, yet unavoidable).

There are enough people who experience arousal, masturbation, and orgasm in the same way that I do (as a bodily function we would prefer not to experience, as opposed to a pleasurable, gratifying activity that we actively seek) that I am validated in my dislike of that particular question.

Have I explained the difference clearly enough yet?

That is according to your own definition of libido and sexual activity. If you check Wikipedia,

Libido, colloquially known as sex drive, is a person's overall sexual drive or desire for sexual activity

And the page for sexual activity

Human sexual activity is the manner in which humans experience and express their sexuality. People engage in a variety of sexual acts, ranging from activities done alone (e.g., masturbation) to acts with another person (e.g., sexual intercourse, non-penetrative sex, oral sex, etc.) in varying patterns of frequency, for a wide variety of reasons.

So libido definitely affects masturbation.
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That is according to your own definition of libido and sexual activity. If you check Wikipedia,

Libido, colloquially known as sex drive, is a person's overall sexual drive or desire for sexual activity

And the page for sexual activity

Human sexual activity is the manner in which humans experience and express their sexuality. People engage in a variety of sexual acts, ranging from activities done alone (e.g., masturbation) to acts with another person (e.g., sexual intercourse, non-penetrative sex, oral sex, etc.) in varying patterns of frequency, for a wide variety of reasons.

So libido definitely affects masturbation.

The general definitions of 'libido' and 'sex drive' are written without asexual people in mind. The people who originally defined the term ''libido'' assumed that anyone with a healthy amount of sex hormones (a healthy libido) would automatically have a healthy drive to seek partnered sex unless there were underlying emotional issues or trauma involved, therefor they automatically assumed that libido and sex drive are one and the same thing (as is clearly shown in your quote there) Yet asexuals who get their hormones checked (due usually to the insistence of others) will often be found to have very healthy hormone levels (a healthy libido) and do masturbate and experience arousal regularly, yet have no desire to seek partnered sexual activity.

When they say ''sex drive'' and ''desire for sexual activity'' in that quote you gave, they are meaning an actual desire for the sexual pleasure associated with these things, not someone getting rid of arousal just because they have a healthy amount of sex hormones (a healthy libido) and masturbation is the only way to get rid of arousal - which is how many asexuals respond to arousal and having a healthy libido; it's not a drive for sexual gratification, it's just a necessity to get rid of arousal even if you'd rather never experience it.

Yes libido obviously effects masturbation, if your libido is non-existent you are not going to be experiencing arousal and masturbating regularly.

What I am saying is that someone (asexual or sexual) can have a high libido and a high drive to seek sexual gratification through masturbation or partnered sex (the partnered sex part would only apply to sexuals). Another person can have a high libido and not have a desire for partnered sexual activity (an asexual), someone else can have a low libido and still have an innate desire within them for partnered sex, their arousal response just does not function they way they would want it to, and yet another person can have a high libido yet not actively desire the pleasure associated with orgasm through masturbation: they just masturbate to get rid of arousal, not to seek gratification from orgasm. (I fall into this category, so do plenty of others I have met on AVEN)

What do you think? An asexual man with a healthy libido and a raging hardon is just going to walk around with his hardon jutting out of his pants? No, he will (often) have to get rid of that hardon through masturbation if it won't go away on it's own or keeps coming back. He isn't desiring gratification associated with masturbation, he just wants to get rid of his erection. It's not drive for gratification, it's just a removal of something. Asexual women can experience the same thing (and sexual people too for that matter depending on the circumstances). For people like me, masturbation is always like this. It is never a pleasure-seeking experience, it's just getting rid of an unwanted thing. (Not saying all asexual experience this, I am just saying enough people do experience this to justify my dislike of the question we are discussing)

Yet the questionnaire lumped them all in together, as though having a high libido automatically meant you have a desire to experience sexual pleasure/gratification derived from masturbation or partnered sex.

The question should have been broken up into 3 parts:

''How strong is your libido? (the sex hormones that cause arousal)'' - mine is very high

''How often do you masturbate?'' - often, but would prefer not to if given the choice not to experience arousal, as masturbation is boring and inconvenient.

''Do you desire partnered sex?'' No, never.

That's how the question(s) should have been presented (pr something along those lines) in my opinion.

Not ''How strong is your sex drive/libido? Sex drive, or libido, refers to the drive to engage in some kind of sexual gratification, whether through partnered sex or solo stimulation (e.g. masturbation)'' (that's directly copy/pasted from the questionnaire)... I could only answer ''very strong'' (you only had a scale option, one end being very low, the other being very high) despite not having any actual drive to engage in sexual gratification. It's just something that happens that I have no choice but to get rid of, but I don't enjoy it and would prefer that it didn't happen. It's not 'gratifying' for me, any more than urinating is. It; It's an act of getting rid of something for me, not an act of achieving something (ie pleasure). I explained it all more clearly in my previous comment. And no I am by far not the only person here who experiences this.

The way I laid out the question in my own example would give a much better consensus on what percentage have a high libido, what percentage masturbates regularly, and what percentage desires partnered sex, and whether or not libido does actually cause ones drive to seek partnered sexual contact and/or sexual gratification (it does not in the case of many asexual people, who may have a strong libido but have no interest in partnered sex for example)

And I am not sure what you mean by ''that is your own definition of libido''

''In men and women alike, libido is directly linked to androgen hormones (namely testosterone). As men have approximately 40 times as much testosterone as women, they are thought to have a more intense sexual drive; however, more aggressive behavior is demonstrated as well. Such disparity in testosterone levels also exists in other mammals, hence most species show a bias towards more pronounced sexual drive and aggression of males when compared to females.

The exact role of peptides in sexual drive and arousal is still not certain, partly because of their many roles and sites of action. Still, oxytocin – a neuropeptide also dubbed “bonding hormone” – is important in both sexual and parental behavior. Besides regulating for sexual drive, complex oxytocin neural pathways control penile erection and sexual motivation in general.

Dopamine plays a strong role in libido and motivation. This hormone and neurotransmitter is one of the key players in the human body. Steroid hormones set the stage for increased dopamine synthesis and its release during periods of enhanced sexual responding, resulting in an increased sexual drive.''

http://www.news-medical.net/health/What-is-Libido.aspx

Often people who never experience arousal and do not masturbate etc, can be injected with sex hormones or take hormone supplements to boost their libido, and slowly they may begin to experience arousal again and desire partnered sex (depending on the person)

Remember, all the definitions of libido that are around today do not take asexuality into account (most medical professionals automatically assume asexuals just have a low libido) which is why libido and sex drive are so often linked. But no, an abundance of the above listed hormones can cause a person to become aroused often for reasons outside of their control (due to having a healthy, fully functioning libido) without giving that person any greater drive to seek partnered sex, if the person is asexual, or without giving them any greater desire to seek gratification through masturbation.

You can keep arguing all you like, but your opinion is just different from mine. Arguing won't change your opinion of the questionnaire, or my opinion of that particular part of the questionnaire, so I don't see the point in continuing this.

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Done! :) though I expected it to be shorter, I can't wait for the results.

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Plectrophenax

Nice survey overall. I tend to be very cautious about wording and am never quite sure about certain implications. Normally I just have to wing it, but in this case I'll allow myself to ask a few, perhaps pedantic, questions before submitting [some questions I'd rather only respond to when I'm sure about the spirit in which it was asked]. Suggestions come free of charge.

I'll send this to the E-Mail helpfully provided, but it may serve a purpose being posted openly as well. Though, considering most people seem to be able to answer the questions just fine, I may just be particulary dense when it comes to interpreting them.

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Does the question

At what age did you first identify *to others* as asexual, gray-A, demisexual, or some equivalent term?

include digital platforms like AVEN, or is it limited to 'real-life' exchanges?

In either case, I feel as though a personal outing to specific people is implied [as opposed to indirectly shared profile info on an anonymous forum], especially considering the following question. But the wording is ambiguous enough that, if AVEN was the first place where I used the label 'asexual' in relation to myself in such a way that other people [strangers to me] could take notice of that, my age at that time would be the correct response. Could someone clarify, please?

The same goes for the "friends" or "aquaintances" options in the next question. Perhaps a distinction between digital and 'real-life' would make sense, since it's quite a different story whether or not one is 'out' via digital or personal means [or personal and impersonal means in general]? Just a thought.

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I would also advocate for posing the question

How strong is your sex drive/libido?

in such a way that enquires about masturbation [or even partnered sex] in a purely detached arousal-context seperately from these activities done for the purpose of "sexual gratification". There is a difference there, and while the question is worded clearly [inquiring specifically about gratification], the interpretation thereof might be based on the assumption that people equate any form of sexual activity [including apathetic ones] with "sexual gratification". Even if this is clear to a majority of people, a more precice distinction is always favourable whenever possible, and a more specific additional question can do nothing but increase the utility of the census. Though this, too, is just a suggestion.

Likewise, the question

If you have ever masturbated, how frequently do you do so?

could be expanded to include the motivation for masturbation [relief, boredom, sexual gratification, notions of normalcy, etc].

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A similar thing goes for the next question about "interest" in kinks and fetishes and the like.

How interested are you in any kink, bdsm, or fetish activities (including non-sexual ones)?

Does this imply concrete interest [actively practicing/wanting to practice/fantasising about/etc these things] as well as more theoretical interest [facination/detached curiosity/intrigue/etc], or is it meant to cover only one of those? It seems like both is applicable, but at the same time that strikes me as potentially hurting the evaluation of the question, since unless the two types of interests coincide, the implications behind each of them are fairly different.

[Also, what is a 'non-sexual' fetish? Couldn't this be anything that is of sufficient 'interest'? I have a rather strong liking for mint tea, does that make me have a 'mint-tea-fetish'? And if it does, do I really respond to this question with a 'very interested'? Now that would skewer the results. I'm almost certain this isn't what is meant, but I have never heard the word 'fetish' used in a non-sexual context, though it is frequently used in a merely loosely sexual context.]

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The "Sexual History and Sexual Violence" section is very well handled , and it's great that there is an option to directly skip it.

But, given the nature of the questions, how much sense does it make for someone with no sexual history [including sexual violence] to respond to these? Since every question in this section pertains to sexual activities, I would merely be responding in the negative by default. Is that the idea? I feel like this, too, could easily lead to a distortion of the results [of course I have never experienced sex for XYZ reasons or in a XYZ way, since I've never experienced sex in the first place]. Wouldn't it make sense to make this section exclusive to people with a sexual history [and the willingness to answer, of course]?

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I would appreciate if the question

Do you consider yourself sex-positive, sex-neutral or sex-negative, when it comes to sex in general?

would have a specific option for 'sex-apathetic', since it's not quite the same as 'sex-neutral'. Neutrality implies a positive stance [neutrality] while apathy does not. I'm Swiss, I should know ^_^

[Alternately, if it is considered the same by most, the 'sex-neutral' option could be specified to read 'sex-neutral or -apathetic'. If that isn't ideal either, then an 'other' option where one can elaborate would also be appreciated.]

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Overall, very well put-together survey, though. Thank you for your efforts.

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