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Could I be demigender?


Sleppy

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I'm a new AVEN user who recently figured out I'm asexual (and I think a panromantic). Although I'm only fifteen with that realisation I've also begun questioning my gender.

I've grown up thinking I was a girl as I was AFAB but I've always been a 'tomboy'. I have male and female friends but I usually act what people would describe as masculine. I don't like makeup/fashion and usually dress in clothes like hoodies and jeans. At the moment if anybody where to ask me my gender I would probably say 'I'm a girl but I don't really mind what you call me'. I've been wondering if I could be a demigirl. I was born and raised as a 'girl' but I don't really associate myself as a girl or a boy. I'm still comfortable with she/her pronouns but I am also okay without them?

I've also never really liked it whenever somebody calls me a 'young lady' or tells me 'we're all girls here'. This might be irrelevant but I'm just confused about myself.

It's difficult for me to explain how I feel but any advice would really help me out, thanks.

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Agent Rainbow

Actually, this is exactly what I'm going through! I'm a huge tomboy, and I only say I'm a girl cuz I have the parts. I'm not a fan of being called girl, or beig treated like one. I do prefer she/her pronouns. What I don't get is how you "feel" a gender. I know it's super hard to explain, but I'm assuming it's a gut feeling. If so, I don't really feel like a girl at all. Or at least not that much. I think I'm a demigirl. So, feel free to PM me if you have any questions as to whether what I'm going through is what you are going through as well.

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mustardblood

Hey there and welcome to AVEN! I have lately been going through a lot of what you said, I am fifteen and trying to figure out who I am. I am demigender in my case demimale. I have never been quite what you would call masculine but i am not feminine either. when asked I usually will say that I am male because that is my birth gender but, when other people refer to me as male I would almost get uncomfortable. I always had considered myself to be male but almost not like how other guys are if that makes any since. There was always a barrier of sorts when it came to me considering myself male but, I never really considered myself anything else so I would just kinda not think about to for very long and just go on. It was not until recently that I learned about demigender that I realized that that label fit me better than anything else. It is really hard to explain but I hope this helps.

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Welcome Kaminski!

From what you describe, demigirl may very well be the term for you. You could also consider agender too though, if you feel no part woman or girl. It's all on a spectrum; those who have no internal sense of gender, or who have no gender, use the term agender. Those who feel somewhat like a girl, but not fully, use the term demigirl. Do either of those explanations resonate with you?

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That does kind of sound like me, I've always just assumed I'm a girl because I am AFAB. In my mind I don't assume a gender, I just think 'I am a person'. I don't understand how people 'feel' they're a particular gender either. If a person calls me a girl I'll just accept it, mostly because I have a female body and it's easier for someone to call me that. I use she/her pronouns but people can call me whatever they like and I wouldn't have an issue with it. To be honest I just assumed people weren't gendered in their minds but apparently you can be?

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There are in fact some people who are very gendered in their minds ;)

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Kaminski: Been there, that how I describe being demigirl to. I say demigirl cauz I don't act like the others woman.

I don't like the same stuff has them and I just don't see anything that i can relate to. The only girl thing that I do is painting my nail taking care of skin and hair like a girl. By that I mean use the correct products for my type of skin and hair for obvious reasons. I do wear some women cloths (Pants, underwears cauz it fit) but not all of my cloths came from the women department. I recently found some sweater in the man section and they are just awesome. ^_^

So for me fashion is not a interesting thing... Just like gossip magazine, drama movies (chick flick), small talk... And what ever others women like to do. :mellow:

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