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For 20-somethings getting their feet off the ground

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Ossiekins

Hi all! I'm 20. Currently in my second year studying Music, and completely freaking out because I have no idea what I'm going to do with my degree. To be honest I'd be happy staying at uni forever so I never had to worry about getting a job or anything, but I don't think that's going to work somehow.

ha...I feel the same way about my degree in Art. Except, I'm done and still haven't figured out what to do...I also would have been happy staying in school, really tempted to go back, but there really isn't anything more "useful" I can think of taking. Hopefully something good comes of your degree though! I hope that your program has been awesome c: I enjoyed mine so much, made some great friends.

anywho...I'm 23 and I've been out of school for...I guess 2 years now, it really doesn't feel like that long. I've been married a year, which also seems like that was also just yesterday, and we just recently bought a house. We also got a cat together that we've had 2 months and we have two dogs as well. The second one we also adopted together (I keep documentation of that for the lawyer, which is a long story). Even though we're financially stable with my husband's income even with him going to school full time, I still feel like I should be doing more for our little family of fuzz. Pets really don't need much....but I don't know, I feel pretty useless that all I'm good at is drawing pretty pictures...which I'm sure some people don't think are that pretty, but that's what I went to school for (more or less).

So yea....idk, guess I just feel like something is missing on my end. Job hunting has been awful...I've more or less given up on that...I feel like a huge burden to my husband due to my sexuality (which he is fine with) and my mental health. I'm really lucky to have someone who understands and doesn't care if I ever work, but idk, it just doesn't seem right. I don't really know what to do next though lol I guess that was just my little blurb of rant/venting

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Autumn Sunrise

Happy New Year, all :wub: Hope 2015 will be great/good/better than 2014 for everyone on AVEN :D

Ossiekins, I hope 2015 will bring you an opportunity for some work that you'll enjoy!
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Sage Raven Domino

Yeah, new opportunities are what we always need, so let everyone have them in 2015! :cake:

(That's gonna be a big year for me - as every new year, haha - either a big rise or an epic fail.)

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Ossiekins

Thanks, I hope something comes up c:

Hope that you, Autumn, and Diamond both have a good year c: hopefully lots of good things come from it ^^

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Bear91

Hi all. I’m Jenny, I’m 23. I’ve just had my quarter life crisis and completely freaked out because I have nothing done that I think I should have and I’m basically not ready to be an adult. Many reasons, one of which is I’m still a tiny bit afraid of the dark haha xD I’m all good now, no longer stressing so I’m focusing on finishing my last year at college and actually qualifying in something I find interesting :) Other than that I still live at home with my parents and gave up the only job I had to do this course.

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charliemcphee

Well, on the 'not ready to be an adult' front, I was talking to my aunt today and apparently none of my family feels like an adult. So either I'm related to half a dozen very tall infants or the whole world is populated with people freaking out about being grown-up. How reassuring (!)

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Kulukan

At age 20 I can't help but shake off this feeling that I'm going to live a really short life. As an aromantic ace I feel pretty okay with being comfortable by myself, and I've got a job I like to occupy my time, but it just feels tremendously wrong. Maybe I'd really love to be with someone and I'm in denial about it, but now that I think about it, what makes everything really awful is that seemingly all of my contemporaries from school and university are so happy and doing so well. Also doesn't help that I can't see so many of them because 'Nah, sorry, man, girlfriend doesn't want me to.' or similar.

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Autumn Sunrise

Well, on the 'not ready to be an adult' front, I was talking to my aunt today and apparently none of my family feels like an adult. So either I'm related to half a dozen very tall infants or the whole world is populated with people freaking out about being grown-up. How reassuring (!)

Or . . . maybe its just that there's no obvious, hard line between childhood and adolescence, or between adolescence and adulthood, and our expectations of how we should feel at different stages are not very clear. I'm quite a lot older than most of you guys on this thread, but even now I don't feel like a complete adult (whatever that is :lol: ), and I can still feel a lot of the child and the adolescent inside my "adult" persona. Maybe that's just the way things are, and perhaps we're just more willing to admit it. Not a bad way to be, if you think about it :)

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charliemcphee

Well, on the 'not ready to be an adult' front, I was talking to my aunt today and apparently none of my family feels like an adult. So either I'm related to half a dozen very tall infants or the whole world is populated with people freaking out about being grown-up. How reassuring (!)

Or . . . maybe its just that there's no obvious, hard line between childhood and adolescence, or between adolescence and adulthood, and our expectations of how we should feel at different stages are not very clear. I'm quite a lot older than most of you guys on this thread, but even now I don't feel like a complete adult (whatever that is :lol: ), and I can still feel a lot of the child and the adolescent inside my "adult" persona. Maybe that's just the way things are, and perhaps we're just more willing to admit it. Not a bad way to be, if you think about it :)

So maybe a lot of the stress about growing up and becoming an 'adult' is just the disconnect between how we feel and how we expect to feel? Because I was definitely expecting to be a lot more mature by now, and it doesn't quite seem to have really... happened.

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BlueStar08

I'm fairly new to AVEN but I saw this thread on twenty-somethings and got really excited!

I'm twenty (yikes - can't I just be a kid again?) and I'm currently studying music education. I'm a junior, and I have to say there is a lot of pressure on my shoulders. Money has been an issue since my parent's divorce, so there has always been this never ending struggle to find a way to support myself while also pursuing my dreams. I get the usual questions that come with pursuing a career that doesn't have as much job security as others, and it scares me to think that I might not make it.

I found out about asexuality in June and its really helped me to know I'm not alone. I've dealt with a lot of self hate for not being able to conform to the sexual side of society, and it feels great to have found communities like this! I've had one pretty damaging relationship in the past, and since then I've steered clear of them - I'll try again when I'm ready I guess. I came out as asexual online this past October, and I got a very positive response (thank goodness for my supportive friends) and although it was a risk that I'm glad I took, I sometimes think it might have been a mistake. I did it mainly to raise awareness, but I'm wondering if sharing this part of myself will keep me from ever being in a meaningful relationship.

I identify as heteromantic, but I'm also beginning to think that I might be lithromantic, which complicates things even more. Any who, I guess I'm like every other twenty-something, just trying to figure myself out!

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Skywolf

Got two interviews next week, and though I keep hearing lots of "they might not get back for weeks" "you're new" "you're hoping THAT?" i'm being optimistic! Job, apartment..dream would be by the end of the month. So much to do, trying to pack, and apply for jobs, and keep to my resolutions. Welcome to being in your 20's, I guess.

^_^

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Autumn Sunrise

Good luck, Skywolf. I hope you get the job you want most, and the rest - apartment, etc - all falls into place :)

It can be a difficult time, but whatever happens, keep believing in yourself - YOU know that you have a lot to offer!

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OptimisticPessimist

Goodluck Skywolf

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AwkwardAntelope

Best of luck, Skywolf!

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Ossiekins

Good luck, SkyWolf c: Hope your interviews go well.

I'm fairly new to AVEN but I saw this thread on twenty-somethings and got really excited!

I'm twenty (yikes - can't I just be a kid again?) and I'm currently studying music education. I'm a junior, and I have to say there is a lot of pressure on my shoulders. Money has been an issue since my parent's divorce, so there has always been this never ending struggle to find a way to support myself while also pursuing my dreams. I get the usual questions that come with pursuing a career that doesn't have as much job security as others, and it scares me to think that I might not make it.

I found out about asexuality in June and its really helped me to know I'm not alone. I've dealt with a lot of self hate for not being able to conform to the sexual side of society, and it feels great to have found communities like this! I've had one pretty damaging relationship in the past, and since then I've steered clear of them - I'll try again when I'm ready I guess. I came out as asexual online this past October, and I got a very positive response (thank goodness for my supportive friends) and although it was a risk that I'm glad I took, I sometimes think it might have been a mistake. I did it mainly to raise awareness, but I'm wondering if sharing this part of myself will keep me from ever being in a meaningful relationship.

I identify as heteromantic, but I'm also beginning to think that I might be lithromantic, which complicates things even more. Any who, I guess I'm like every other twenty-something, just trying to figure myself out!

That's pretty cool, I studied art when I was in college c: might go back to learn more, but it hasn't helped get me a job lol but that doesn't matter, drawing and creating is my passion and I think it's good that you feel confident enough to pursue further education in your passions. Hopefully it gets you a job, but at least you're studying something you love c:

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SereneWyrd

So cool to find this thread! I'm just starting my 22nd year of life, have a steady job, moved out to live with a friend almost two years ago, and kinda mostly keeping the bills paid, and my bank account finally seems to be evening out so its not all...reddish. After having to move three times that first year, and the startup costs for each move...and then trying to pay for college out of my own paycheck, even community college, kinda kicked my feet out from under me, financially, but I'm hoping I'm about to have my footing back. I am not taking any more classes until I am actually in a position to do so monetarily, despite all the questions about what I plan to do with my life. I like my current life well enough, but I still want to relocate to a state that I haven't spent most of my life in. I have only had one relationship, back in highschool, and since then have been more focused on "finding myself" than on finding "the one".

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Cedrorum

Hi guys! I'm Teavian and I'm about to be 24 at the end of this month on the 27th...*groans* Why does time fly by so fast? I lived with my parents for a really long time until summer of last year. I'm really relieved I got to move out with my boyfriend since we both work at the same job and we were able to afford enough to get out of there. I really didn't want to live with them anymore because it was an extremely toxic household...they were always fighting and there were many times my parents would say extremely hurtful things to me and it would kill my self esteem. They're the type who act like they're really loving and do no wrong, either.

But anyway, I'm working this job and hoping to eventually become a professional freelance illustrator. It's going to take a long time I know, but I'm hoping this year I can start commissions. I've been in the same college since 2009(sad I know) very slowly finishing my AA degree, with my last class being this fall semester. I took two semesters off due to the whole moving thing. We don't drive yet so uh..that's a challenge too. I don't really know if I want to go onto a university after this because I just feel like it wouldn't be worth it. Most universities I can get into with my AA degree basically offer painting and basic classes I've already taken at this school like life drawing. I realized I do better teaching myself with art, so I might just go with that for a while.

*sigh* I hope to eventually move to Seattle WA too but that'll take a ton of saving up..

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Spectrolite7

my 20s have been full of depression every day, can't even get out of bed even though I graduated with a bachelor's degree. :( not right.

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Ossiekins

Hi guys! I'm Teavian and I'm about to be 24 at the end of this month on the 27th...*groans* Why does time fly by so fast? I lived with my parents for a really long time until summer of last year. I'm really relieved I got to move out with my boyfriend since we both work at the same job and we were able to afford enough to get out of there. I really didn't want to live with them anymore because it was an extremely toxic household...they were always fighting and there were many times my parents would say extremely hurtful things to me and it would kill my self esteem. They're the type who act like they're really loving and do no wrong, either.

But anyway, I'm working this job and hoping to eventually become a professional freelance illustrator. It's going to take a long time I know, but I'm hoping this year I can start commissions. I've been in the same college since 2009(sad I know) very slowly finishing my AA degree, with my last class being this fall semester. I took two semesters off due to the whole moving thing. We don't drive yet so uh..that's a challenge too. I don't really know if I want to go onto a university after this because I just feel like it wouldn't be worth it. Most universities I can get into with my AA degree basically offer painting and basic classes I've already taken at this school like life drawing. I realized I do better teaching myself with art, so I might just go with that for a while.

*sigh* I hope to eventually move to Seattle WA too but that'll take a ton of saving up..

I'm going to be 24 in April. I lived with my parents for a long time, but then got married and moved out a year ago. Glad you're out on your own, my family was toxic as well, so I can relate. I imagine it must be pretty great with your own place and space c:

Good luck with being an illustrator, it's something I'd love to do, but haven't had any luck. I bet your artwork is beautiful c: if you do decide to go to University I would suggest looking into Graphic Design or Animation or look around for something in Character Design, I have a friend that went to school for Video Game Art Development and then branched off specifically into Character Design and got himself a BA, so there's always that sort of thing too. I went to school for art in Canada, but it was just a 2 year program that covered everything, it was a blast. But yea. I understand school isn't for everyone and it is a lot of money to put into a field that is so competitive and where you can just get so unlucky, but may as well think about it? No harm in thinking. There also is nothing wrong with learning things on your own c:

my 20s have been full of depression every day, can't even get out of bed even though I graduated with a bachelor's degree. :( not right.

sorry for that, Spectro. Depression does suck and I remember feeling like that before as well, it is hard. Just remember to take things one step at a time c: hope you start to feel better!

What did you get a BA in, if I may ask? c:

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Cedrorum

Hi guys! I'm Teavian and I'm about to be 24 at the end of this month on the 27th...*groans* Why does time fly by so fast? I lived with my parents for a really long time until summer of last year. I'm really relieved I got to move out with my boyfriend since we both work at the same job and we were able to afford enough to get out of there. I really didn't want to live with them anymore because it was an extremely toxic household...they were always fighting and there were many times my parents would say extremely hurtful things to me and it would kill my self esteem. They're the type who act like they're really loving and do no wrong, either.

But anyway, I'm working this job and hoping to eventually become a professional freelance illustrator. It's going to take a long time I know, but I'm hoping this year I can start commissions. I've been in the same college since 2009(sad I know) very slowly finishing my AA degree, with my last class being this fall semester. I took two semesters off due to the whole moving thing. We don't drive yet so uh..that's a challenge too. I don't really know if I want to go onto a university after this because I just feel like it wouldn't be worth it. Most universities I can get into with my AA degree basically offer painting and basic classes I've already taken at this school like life drawing. I realized I do better teaching myself with art, so I might just go with that for a while.

*sigh* I hope to eventually move to Seattle WA too but that'll take a ton of saving up..

I'm going to be 24 in April. I lived with my parents for a long time, but then got married and moved out a year ago. Glad you're out on your own, my family was toxic as well, so I can relate. I imagine it must be pretty great with your own place and space c:

Good luck with being an illustrator, it's something I'd love to do, but haven't had any luck. I bet your artwork is beautiful c: if you do decide to go to University I would suggest looking into Graphic Design or Animation or look around for something in Character Design, I have a friend that went to school for Video Game Art Development and then branched off specifically into Character Design and got himself a BA, so there's always that sort of thing too. I went to school for art in Canada, but it was just a 2 year program that covered everything, it was a blast. But yea. I understand school isn't for everyone and it is a lot of money to put into a field that is so competitive and where you can just get so unlucky, but may as well think about it? No harm in thinking. There also is nothing wrong with learning things on your own c:

my 20s have been full of depression every day, can't even get out of bed even though I graduated with a bachelor's degree. :( not right.

sorry for that, Spectro. Depression does suck and I remember feeling like that before as well, it is hard. Just remember to take things one step at a time c: hope you start to feel better!

What did you get a BA in, if I may ask? c:

Thanks! You're an artist too? :> That's awesome! I'm working on it, though I guess I need to get a bit more motivated at times. And yeah maybe I will go back to school after finishing this AA, but it'll be a while and we'll see.

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Ossiekins

yep, I am c: or at least I like to think I am xD I'm not that great. I've had interviews for a couple graphic design positions, but I guess people more qualified came along and one of the companies actually started to go under after the interview, so I gave up. I wasn't really interested in trying to help a business stay afloat. I've been working on comic pages to maybe start a webcomic and at least make a couple bucks off ads, whenever I get enough pages done.

I've been thinking about going back to school, but I don't know what else I'd do lol there wasn't really any area I liked more. Art History sucked and painting was a pain...but character design and illustration were great, but I'd probably choose to go back to Canada if I decided to go into illustration because I know of a school there with a good program. Here in the states it's mostly graphic design or web development, which would be fine to, but not something I really enjoy as much.

But yea. There's tons of options with art and you can just freelance, which is nice. I haven't had much luck freelancing myself, but probably because I suck at advertising and I mostly do things on a more cartoon side of things...

Anyway, it's pretty awesome to know someone else is into art on here c:

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crowded_mind

Even though it's kinda sad, I'm glad I'm not the only one who ended up with a mostly useless degree. I'm 27 and have a Bachelor in Fine arts with Honours. But I went though a few years after where I wasn't very motivated and felt quite down and haven't done much art in a while. It's useless if I want an actual paying job because with the economic down turn the last thing people want to spend money on is art.

So years later and living with my parents and working 2 casual jobs I'm seriously considering doing another degree maybe in environmental science, but I've also considered doing library services haha so I have no idea what to do.

Ideally I would love to work with my passions of creative writing or art but it seems very hard to get started and I haven't had any luck with getting my writing published so far.

Seems to be a common theme in this thread though so even though it's sad its good to know I'm not alone.

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LyraHW

I never went to University. I have a qualification in Beauty Therapy, did an apprenticeship in Business Administration & am now, on my own time, studying an Open University degree in Humanities (English Literature & Classics) whilst working my full-time job - I'm 28 and still haven't got a scoobies, but I'm pretty sure that's what the 20s are for - figuring yourself out :D

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Hooded_Crow

Hi all!

Soon to be 25 here and I have never had a paid job in my life. I am completely dependent on my parents. I am currently doing my second Master's degree. I have been studying creative writing and now scriptwriting, the latter I'm just realising isn't for me (after pursuing a screenwriting career since high school). So I'm about to drop out of this course and attempt to get my first novel published.

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GwendolynAngel83

Hi guys. I'm 20 and just realixed that the term asexual actually applied to me (Ok, to be honest I think I knew, but was avoiding it). I'm a psychology major and a sophmore and I wish I had my old down time back TT Between college, intern, and work I'm just like, huh? Where'd the time go?

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Guest Scarlet Spider

Yeah, this is the thread I was looking for! I have been posting in the 30's thread for months now.

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ohanashi

Hi all! I'm 27, still living at home, with a BA in history and an unrelated MA that led to my current career. Mostly okay with my job even though its not my passion; who knows, maybe I'll have a midlife career change some day. Discovering the term asexuality helped me begin a process of really getting to know myself, which in turn is helping me think more about what I want in the future. I mostly coasted through life until now, focusing heavily on academics. Currently trying to develop my hobbies, and am curious about baking, writing, drawing, fashion, and Asian entertainment.

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WinterM

I'm 28, and hopefully I won't be thrown out for having a slightly different perspective than some of the people here. I've been out of college for a while now, living on my own dealing with all my own bills and problems. My goal is to make a living doing creative work, and I'm starting to see some of that get off the ground, but I'm not quitting my day job anytime soon. Though my life is fairly stable by most standards, I feel like I'm in transition in a lot of ways.

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FabulFuz

I'll be 28 in may, and I've been going through recurring early-midlife crisis's since I turned 25.

I'm a college dropout; (I went from being homeless to being a college student, had no financial help, couldn't handle everything on my own, and other people around me couldn't handle the transitions/self-discoveries I was going through) In retrospect though, I think it was good for me to drop out. I've discovered that the sorts of things I want to do in life don't require a degree, and I've managed to get a pretty good 'day job' in spite of it. I also have a much smaller amount of debt than most other college kids/graduates I know. (especially us artsy creative major types)

I've learned that continuous self-reflection is a really important tool for navigating your way through your personal doubts and fears, and for grounding yourself so that you can help those you care about without allowing their struggles to take over your life and hinder your personal goals. (I have a tendency to want to help others and then lose sight of myself)

I've found a job that actually uses the technical skills I learned in art school, and should soon be moving to a new apartment to get closer to it, (and away from the city, and from overbearing pseudo-parental land-lady) thanks to a mutual friend who has opened her own business on the same street as my new job.

I've also discovered that you can't let people tell you how to live your life. I received so many messages from people around me that I had to follow certain steps, do certain things, that I would often forget that hey, I'm an adult and I do have choices. I get to decide what being an adult means for me. I don't have to let people around me disqualify my interests and goals as 'not good enough'.

I've learned that I don't have to listen to people tell me; "You have so much potential, why are you wasting it?" because my potential is mine. Not theirs. If I'm healthy and seeking my own self-improvement, I shouldn't have to feel pressured to adopt someone else's step ladder to success.

In fact, something to remember as a twenty-something or even as a teen is that the world around you is constantly changing. What worked for your elders may not necessarily work for you. Many young people are in debt and struggling to find work, have been for the past decade, but are being told that they are just not trying hard enough. That they are lazy. It's a horrible myth.

For people who are creative, or who just have a passion for something, I think it's really important to use that creativity to problem-solve. If someone tells you that this or that thing you really love is a waste of time; laugh in their face and then find a way to earn income from it, or even just connections that could land you an income.

I'm currently setting myself up with a good day job and a personal studio so I can pay the bills, eat a lot of good food, and do all the things that make me happy.

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