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Lauren+Bear

Kink, BDSM, and Cake

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Bloc

Sensation play while being tied up is definitely something I like. Let it be tickling, cuddling, kisses, pain.

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Tiredofpressingbackspace

Kink has never “dominated” my life, excuse the pun ;P. However it is something I have learned though experience it is something I enjoy.  It is really nice to see the amount of people who are asexual and kinky. It is a shame (to me anyways, lol) how the majority of people interested in kink completely revolve around sex.  I would really love to have a few in-depth friendly conversations regarding kink/asexual  with anyone interested.  Feel free to message me.

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Tarento
On 3/17/2019 at 6:32 AM, Bloc said:

Why should it not be considered BDSM? It is definitely bondage and you don't have to do dominance and submission of include pain. I totally get the appeal of this or cuddling while being tied up or having someone tied up. A scene which really interests me is being submissive and tying the partner on their commands or being dominant and getting tied up by your partner on your commands.

Hell, even being tied up and vulnerable is an exhilirating experience in itself. Anything that happens as a result of that, is a bonus in my book.

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Omelette
Posted (edited)

Being wrapped in a blanket and tied up over it and watching anime sounds like heaven to me...

Like 'yes, you are protected and safe. And there's nothing you can do except being protected and safe :D '

Edited by Omelette
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Tarento
On 3/26/2019 at 7:38 PM, Omelette said:

Being wrapped in a blanket and tied up over it and watching anime sounds like heaven to me...

Like 'yes, you are protected and safe. And there's nothing you can do except being protected and safe :D '

What kind of anime we talking? 😁

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Tiredofpressingbackspace
On 3/25/2019 at 5:28 PM, Tarento said:

Hell, even being tied up and vulnerable is an exhilirating experience in itself. Anything that happens as a result of that, is a bonus in my book.

 

Haha, simply cuddling and bondage has always been a relaxing fun night over a lot of things.

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Bloc
4 hours ago, Tiredofpressingbackspace said:

 

Haha, simply cuddling and bondage has always been a relaxing fun night over a lot of things.

It doesn't have to be night 😉

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Omelette
11 hours ago, Tarento said:

What kind of anime we talking? 😁

You just had to trigger my imagination xD

 

I guess there's so many ways to go on from there! It could be a positive, hopeful anime that drives home the 'you're safe and protected' message, like Howl's Moving Castle. It could be, in contrast, something with chills and thrills, like Akagi. It could be something which triggers a lot of discussion (maybe Cells at Work? Never seen it), and that'd be interesting because I normally tend to gesture a lot when I try to explain some things... It could even be something so incredibly hilarious (like Sayonara Zetsubou sensei) that I'd be laughing until I couldn't breathe anymore, and, being unable to pause the video myself, I'd have to beg for mercy~

 

...I think I have at least one new fantasy now xD

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Tarento
1 hour ago, Omelette said:

 

...I think I have at least one new fantasy now xD

Ahaha my work is done!

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Moonlightbaby

Sometimes I hate the fact that I have zero sexual drive because if I did I would totally explore the whole BDSM world. I love the concepts, I would love to inflict pain on a partner in a sexual scenario... Is it weird that I don't like sex, but at the same time I feel like I'd do crazy things in bed if I just had the drive to go for it lol 

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batmmann5
13 hours ago, Moonlightbaby said:

Sometimes I hate the fact that I have zero sexual drive because if I did I would totally explore the whole BDSM world. I love the concepts, I would love to inflict pain on a partner in a sexual scenario... Is it weird that I don't like sex, but at the same time I feel like I'd do crazy things in bed if I just had the drive to go for it lol 

It doesn't have to be sexual.  Most bd/sm parties it isn't sexual.  I tie up a younger woman and Top her and she does the same for me and it is not sexual.  We just play around with different sensations.  It's fun.  You should try it.  Brian

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Tiredofpressingbackspace
57 minutes ago, batmmann5 said:

It doesn't have to be sexual.  Most bd/sm parties it isn't sexual.  I tie up a younger woman and Top her and she does the same for me and it is not sexual.  We just play around with different sensations.  It's fun.  You should try it.  Brian

I totally agree with you. However finding partners that are both asexual and kinky is a more difficult task. 

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Bloc
17 minutes ago, Tiredofpressingbackspace said:

I totally agree with you. However finding partners that are both asexual and kinky is a more difficult task. 

Finding a partner happy with non sexual play is easier. However it takes some time and best is to go to events with are explicitly no sex. Yes they are not so much and probably you need some time in the local scene to find them. I don't know how old you are, but here an organization aimed at kinky youth provides such events.

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Omelette

Anyone here who's been to a munch - what did you think about it?

 

On one hand, I'd love to meet someone whom I could share and maybe eventually explore some of my fantasies with.

 

On the other, I'm an introverted woman who is really bad at getting social clues, including flirting, and anxious as fuck about it.

 

I guess I was wondering what's the typical atmosphere at a munch. Do people hit on each other? How much is sexuality mentioned? (I could probably handle some jokes, but if people started a lengthy discussion about the best vibrators for orgasm control, it would be too much for me).

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KrystalLost

Anyone mind checking out my "Not interested in being a sub" thread. I'm stressed out about it and would like answers TwT.

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Tiredofpressingbackspace
4 hours ago, Bloc said:

Finding a partner happy with non sexual play is easier. However it takes some time and best is to go to events with are explicitly no sex. Yes they are not so much and probably you need some time in the local scene to find them. I don't know how old you are, but here an organization aimed at kinky youth provides such events.

I am in my 20's but could probably pass for being 19 for the next 10 years lol. I rather (like in the past) enjoy doing it with someone who I would also consider a friend. When I tried going to a munch in that setting, I feel everyone there is way to motivated on kink and not wanting to know you as a person at all. But I understand now that I am done uni meeting people who may also enjoy non-sexual kink is becoming very limited. Kink doesn't dominate my life, excuse the pun! But it is something I have fun doing, mainly bondage.

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Bloc
5 hours ago, Tiredofpressingbackspace said:

I am in my 20's but could probably pass for being 19 for the next 10 years lol. I rather (like in the past) enjoy doing it with someone who I would also consider a friend. When I tried going to a munch in that setting, I feel everyone there is way to motivated on kink and not wanting to know you as a person at all. But I understand now that I am done uni meeting people who may also enjoy non-sexual kink is becoming very limited. Kink doesn't dominate my life, excuse the pun! But it is something I have fun doing, mainly bondage. 

Here we are probably different. I don't need to be friends first, but I need to get to know them better first which could happen on multiple visits to the munch or meeting outside. But then I would like that the kink relationship envoles into a friendship or some other close relationship. For me kink is also manly some fun activity and not the center of my life. My main kinks are cuddling and bondage.

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batmmann5
21 hours ago, Omelette said:

Anyone here who's been to a munch - what did you think about it?

 

On one hand, I'd love to meet someone whom I could share and maybe eventually explore some of my fantasies with.

 

On the other, I'm an introverted woman who is really bad at getting social clues, including flirting, and anxious as fuck about it.

 

I guess I was wondering what's the typical atmosphere at a munch. Do people hit on each other? How much is sexuality mentioned? (I could probably handle some jokes, but if people started a lengthy discussion about the best vibrators for orgasm control, it would be too much for me).

Many munches in different states/countries.  Great place to meet and talk to people.  I suck at social cues.  Someone could be interested in me, and I never knew it.  Laugh.  Every munch is different.  Sometimes, there are subjects, so that can be more sexual based conversation.  Usually, it isn't sexual at all is my experience.  I don't see people hitting on each other, but I suck at telling this.  I see people at parties playing and don't jump to, they are having sex with each other.  I think you should go.    Never know what will happen.  Love of your life may be there.  Brian

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batmmann5
18 hours ago, KrystalLost said:

Anyone mind checking out my "Not interested in being a sub" thread. I'm stressed out about it and would like answers TwT.

Well, what works for me are restraints.  I am more a bottom, but when I tie a woman up, I feel more in control.  I would think, that if you had someone tied up, you wouldn't be thinking of yourself as submissive too much in that time.  Maybe later, but probably not right then.  Laugh.  I actually like Topping more than I thought I would.  I did it years ago, but it wasn't nearly as much fun as it is now.  I think that is because I really like playing with this girl.  She really likes to tie as much as I do too.  She gives me what I like, so I try to give her what she likes.  It's been a lot of fun.  Brian

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Omelette
1 hour ago, batmmann5 said:

Many munches in different states/countries.  Great place to meet and talk to people.  I suck at social cues.  Someone could be interested in me, and I never knew it.  Laugh.  Every munch is different.  Sometimes, there are subjects, so that can be more sexual based conversation.  Usually, it isn't sexual at all is my experience.  I don't see people hitting on each other, but I suck at telling this.  I see people at parties playing and don't jump to, they are having sex with each other.  I think you should go.    Never know what will happen.  Love of your life may be there.  Brian

Thank you! Not looking for love, but wouldn't mind a close friend ^^

 

I was also wondering...Ever had a problem getting across that you weren't interested in sexual/sexually-charged play? I live in a pretty big city, so technically I assume people would be more accepting here, but it sort of makes me anxious and I was wondering what other people's experiences were ^^

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Moonlightbaby
On 4/6/2019 at 1:55 PM, batmmann5 said:

It doesn't have to be sexual.  Most bd/sm parties it isn't sexual.  I tie up a younger woman and Top her and she does the same for me and it is not sexual.  We just play around with different sensations.  It's fun.  You should try it.  Brian

Oh, I never though about that scenario. That would be perfect, actually. I guess I just have to search for the right partner then. Thank you for answering!

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Moonlightbaby
On 4/6/2019 at 2:53 PM, Tiredofpressingbackspace said:

I totally agree with you. However finding partners that are both asexual and kinky is a more difficult task. 

That seems to be a bit hard, but I guess it's not impossible. I'll see... 

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lycanrising
On 4/7/2019 at 6:48 PM, Omelette said:

Thank you! Not looking for love, but wouldn't mind a close friend ^^

 

I was also wondering...Ever had a problem getting across that you weren't interested in sexual/sexually-charged play? I live in a pretty big city, so technically I assume people would be more accepting here, but it sort of makes me anxious and I was wondering what other people's experiences were ^^

I started in the london kink scene a few months ago and didn't have a problem.  I recognise some events just won't be for me but I've never had much trouble explaining what I'm into.  It may be that the kink scene is so full of meeting people who are into something that they're not that it's not such a biggie.

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Omelette
1 hour ago, lycanrising said:

I started in the london kink scene a few months ago and didn't have a problem.  I recognise some events just won't be for me but I've never had much trouble explaining what I'm into.  It may be that the kink scene is so full of meeting people who are into something that they're not that it's not such a biggie.

Oh...London!

 

I really like Anatomie Studio ^^

 

Also, thank you!

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arani86
On 4/6/2019 at 11:53 AM, Tiredofpressingbackspace said:

I totally agree with you. However finding partners that are both asexual and kinky is a more difficult task. 

This! How does one even navigate this?! 

I've been in the BDSM scene for years and it's been frustrating trying to find compatible kink partners who are asexual or at the very least comfortable with *me* being asexual. I find people who are cool with it at first, but it takes time for me to build a trusting connection with someone to feel comfortable enough to have a scene with them. So I develop friendships and romances and dialogs and very clearly state my needs and limitations .... and  after all that people often seem to think they are comfortable with it, but then get confused after we finally start having scenes about why I'm not really interested in a scene leading to sex.

I'm okay with orchestrating other people's sexual release, or even reaching my own physical climax or release, but I don't need orgasms, and when I have them they usually aren't during sex. I'd rather just not, even when I do feel sexual energy building towards orgasm in myself, I find the sensation annoying and distracting. I don't mind helping someone else to orgasm, but when that becomes the focus...me helping someone else reach orgasm, even in the context of a kink scene that I was initially down for, I just end up disconnecting. When to focus is on me reaching orgasm, its...just a lot of pressure for something I don't even freaking care about. 

Finding other kink friendly friends and partners would be amazing if they could be okay with my asexuality. I would love to find other compatible kinky asexuals, but yeah, that just seems like such a tall order most of the time. 

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tunasupreme

I just want to say thanks to this thread. Without it, I wouldn't have figured out I am aroace with kinks.  ( uniform and daddy/dom :p)   It feels good to finally put it all together. Now I fully understand my attractions to the characters like Agent Smith, Elrond, Poldark, TF2 Medic,  and Premier League referees. (its the black uniforms and authority.) 

I thought I was het romantic but reading everyone's thoughts on kink and whatnot, made me realize it was never about romance for me. 

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Lame_and_Cycling

I'm a sensualist and I'm very into the sensual aspects of both sex and BDSM and I enjoy fulfilling my partner's kinks and needs. My only kink that I have is when I have a partner who wants to climax I enjoy getting them off. The only difficult thing is when they expect to be able to do the same. I just don't enjoy reciprocation a whole lot. 

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RebirthArt

So, my fetish can be a "bit" crazy and controverse (cuz i am Heteroromantic), but i like Giantess (Basically Giant Girls), but specially Vore (Be eaten entiry and alive), i dont know why i have that fetish, but i think it serve to replace my no interest in sexual relationships

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