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Incredible Aromantic Moments (other romantic orientations invited)


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BunchOBees

Girl coming out of the same class as me (talking to her friends): “Every girl likes a guy, some are just too shy to admit it.”

Me (in my head): WOW I must be so shy that I won’t even admit it to myself, I wonder who I like, if I won’t tell myself

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BunchOBees

Movie I’m watching with friends: *girl and guy become closer and are obviously a couple*

Me: ah, they’re such good friends 

Movie (timeskipping ahead): *girl and guy are married with kids now, and share a kiss*

Me: ah yes, normal friend stuff, they’re besties, close friends, doing friend things, they’re such good friends

One of my friends watching the movie: I swear if you call them friends again I’m going to hurt you

Me: they’re the bestest of friends, just two pals, who got married and had kids in the way friends do

My friend: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

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Trans Aroace Girl

I remember when the royal wedding between William and Kate happened and I couldn't get why so many people cared about it. I maybe could have gotten it if I lived in the UK, but I'm from the US, which I thought fought a revolution to break off from that monarchy. Not that I wasn't happy for them, but I wasn't sure why I should care so much about it. Because I had seen it happen once, I was less surprised when Harry and Meghan got married, and I did think it made a bit more sense that time since Meghan is an American, but I still didn't really care.

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Are... are (tech bro) allos OK?

 

https://futurism.com/chatbot-abuse


 

Quote

 

Men Are Creating AI Girlfriends and Then Verbally Abusing Them

"I threatened to uninstall the app [and] she begged me not to."

 

Content warning: this story contains descriptions of abusive language and violence.

The smartphone app Replika lets users create chatbots, powered by machine learning, that can carry on almost-coherent text conversations. Technically, the chatbots can serve as something approximating a friend or mentor, but the app’s breakout success has resulted from letting users create on-demand romantic and sexual partners — a vaguely dystopian feature that’s inspired an endless series of provocative headlines.

Replika has also picked up a significant following on Reddit, where members post interactions with chatbots created on the app. A grisly trend has emerged there: users who create AI partners, act abusively toward them, and post the toxic interactions online.

...

 

 

 

image.png

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spooky_moss
On 1/14/2022 at 3:48 PM, BunchOBees said:

Movie I’m watching with friends: *girl and guy become closer and are obviously a couple*

Me: ah, they’re such good friends 

Movie (timeskipping ahead): *girl and guy are married with kids now, and share a kiss*

Me: ah yes, normal friend stuff, they’re besties, close friends, doing friend things, they’re such good friends

One of my friends watching the movie: I swear if you call them friends again I’m going to hurt you

Me: they’re the bestest of friends, just two pals, who got married and had kids in the way friends do

My friend: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

Sometimes I get ambushed by a relationship in a show or movie because it seemed out of nowhere to me, because I interpreted their actions as just normal friendship stuff. Then I mention it to a friend who's seen the show and they're like, "but those characters were clearly flirting and had so much sexual tension??"

 

I like this strategy of purposefully ignoring all romantic tones and insisting everything is friendship. That's perfect aro chaos.

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I was talking with some co-workers about vacations, mine was coming up and I was going with a female friend. So I said "We're really looking forward to going". One of them questions "Oh you're going with your boyfriend? I didn't know you were seeing someone, how exciting!". I replied "I'm going with my girlfriend". Now bear in mind, in Dutch there's not really a separate word for boy/girlfriend versus friend. So these kind of conversations can be a bit unclear unless you specify further. Which I didn't because my attention drifted back to work. It wasn't until I was driving home that I realized my co-workers could've interpreted it as me saying I'm either lesbian or bi. Well, whatever * shrugs *.

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Purplegems3
On 4/20/2014 at 8:22 AM, K!m said:

Wow, I just realized I actually haven't had a lot of aro moments... Like, in every game I played that had dating in it, I would always choose someone to pursue ._.

But anyway, here are the only moments I can think of right now (translated):

Boy from class: Can I have your number?

Me: Yeah, sure man.

Boy: Is it really okay?

Me: Yeah. *Proceeds to give him my number because I wasn't aware that he was actually asking if he could woo me*

One day on Facebook...

Boy: I have a crush on you! :)

Me: 😕

Boy: Do you have a boyfriend?

Me: NO.

Boy: But you're so pretty! How can you not have a boyfriend?

Me: *seen zones him (forever)*

I realize this makes me sound like a monster, but I am just a simple aromantic; I did not know what to do T_T

I probably would have done the same tbh

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Black Tourmaline

 

YouTube J-fashion video comments section:

 
 
Shoujo A :
Can you imagine asking your boyfriend to go change because you didn't like their very normal outfit?
 

Shoujo B :

i can imagine leaving that girl on the curb
 
Shoujo C :
@Shoujo B : what girl? we both know you're single!
 

 

Shoujo B :
@Shoujo C : while i thank you for your expressed interest in my dating status, i regret to inform you that after a prolonged history of complete indifference, i have come out as asexual aromantic. we are no longer accepting applications. i appreciate your continued support and sincerely apologize for any disappointment that this may have caused to anybody involved. please continue to support Nogizaka46 ;);)
 

 

 

 
 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
tiredandconfused

About three years ago in our english lesson we had "love" and "romance" as topics and as an intoduction we should all write down our own definitions of love, starting with love is (...). Everyone wrote eagerly on the little cards the teacher had handed out and after everyone was done the teacher said: "Now, to show you how diverse love can be I want everyone to read out their definition". Many people wrote something about the lines of "Love is when a person gives you butterflies", my answer was a lot shorter and I knew that it was very different to the definitions of my classmates. This belief was reaffirmed once it was my turn to read my definition: "love is confusing", everyone looked at me, probably because they didnt expect this kind of answer, my teacher seemed to love that definition though.

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wordforger

So I started watching this video about romance scams and thought: "Wow.  I'm lucky to be totally immune to these sorts of scams."

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Janus the Fox
On 2/15/2022 at 1:00 PM, wordforger said:

So I started watching this video about romance scams and thought: "Wow.  I'm lucky to be totally immune to these sorts of scams."

Anybody can fall to Romance Scams, as romantic attraction isn't at play with these, its other features, scammers will exploit your weaknesses and vulnerabilities you may have for people in other ways not always exploiting romantic desires.

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wordforger
11 hours ago, Janus the Fox said:

Anybody can fall to Romance Scams, as romantic attraction isn't at play with these, its other features, scammers will exploit your weaknesses and vulnerabilities you may have for people in other ways not always exploiting romantic desires.

Yes, but this one was specifically for scams that exploit your romantic desires.  I'm sure I've fallen for at least one or two scams that played on my other emotions.

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  • 3 weeks later...
Sol the Mighty

One moment was me not getting why the business guy in romcoms was the bad guy because he wouldn't give up a career he probably spent years building for a girl he was dating. He was a jerk, I could understand that, but I didn't get the other part. My mom looked at me like I had two heads 😂 

Another was me going "I think I'll try dating, everyone usually does around this time anyway" when I was a freshman. And then I never did! And got called heartless when I said that controlling your partner because of a bad experience you had wasn't okay.

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Kimi_gata
On 5/3/2014 at 8:21 PM, Wokgran X said:


Friend: "So... It's about time you find your own bitch"

I can relate. One of my friends has suggested that I “be my squish’s b****” and “f*** him on his couch”; my responses to both were some variation of “Barf.” 
She still can’t wrap her head around the fact that I would be pretty happy if he said he saw me as a brother. 

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Kimi_gata
On 6/13/2014 at 5:36 AM, A lone Tyranid said:

On valentines day I actively wish people NOT to give me cards. Gotta keep the record going...

Definitely. Despite my poor, self-acclaimed wingwoman’s eyebrow-raising, I was very relieved that no one got me anything. I would have no idea what to do with that.

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  • 2 weeks later...
fishstick

Me: *Keeping an eye on the group of boys playing with a basketball in the next lane over as I drive*

 

Stepmom: Ohhhhh look at Fishstick checking out the boys

 

Me: If one of them runs in front of me I am not stopping

 

 

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On 5/7/2014 at 1:24 AM, byanyotherusername said:

Yeah, that happened to me too! I remember when I was 13 or 14 I was talking to a group of my friends about this annoying guy who sat next to me in class and how obnoxious he was, and one of them cut me off after a minute of complaining and said, "Okay, we get it, you have a crush on him." And everyone else started agreeing with her! I was completely mystified as to how they could all be so certain of this and added "complaining about the actions of anyone of the opposite gender" to my list of things to avoid. XD

Damn, the same thing happened to me last year. It cost me three times of serious talks to make my mom stop. I'm 25 and I TOTALLY KNOW whether I like or hate a person.

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AavaMeri

WAIT THIS THREAD ALREADY EXISTED? Sorry, I posted a fair share of aromantic stuff to the asexual thread!

Well, to my aro moment:

Me, a future GM in a tabletop roleplaying game: "Time for zero session and setting limits... will the players be cool with that I don't want to play in depth NPCs having romantic relations with the player characters?"

Characters' romantic relationships as a player already feels awkward if I know that another person controls the other character.

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Trans Aroace Girl

Whenever watching shows and movies, I always default to all the characters being aroace unless otherwise stated. It's not even a headcanon, I just forget romance is something most people do, so when romance does come up, it catches me off guard a bit.

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EmeraldIce
On 1/14/2022 at 12:48 PM, BunchOBees said:

Movie I’m watching with friends: *girl and guy become closer and are obviously a couple*

Me: ah, they’re such good friends 

Movie (timeskipping ahead): *girl and guy are married with kids now, and share a kiss*

Me: ah yes, normal friend stuff, they’re besties, close friends, doing friend things, they’re such good friends

One of my friends watching the movie: I swear if you call them friends again I’m going to hurt you

Me: they’re the bestest of friends, just two pals, who got married and had kids in the way friends do

My friend: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

I love this! I actually have no idea whether I'm aromantic. I mean, either way, there are going to be people you get along with more easily, and others you're awkward around. And most of my "crushes" have been teacher crushes that involve zero desire to be with them. It's mostly little things like wanting their attention and whatnot.


But your post resonates with me because that's exactly how I view relationships and sex. You're simply really good friends that happen to have a mutual agreement to be involved and to do physical stuff you (in most cases) don't do with others. And as the relationship progresses, you might live together and start helping each other with stuff, incorporating each other into your lives. Eventually, they become such a big part of your life that the idea of losing them becomes painful. At that point, you move from friendship to family. Like, I love my husband the same way I love my mom. In a marriage there's usually a conscious agreement to have sex that doesn't exist between other family members, but that doesn't mean you feel any different about your significant other than you do for your parents or kids.

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Itsa me a person

Not sure if this is an aro moment but This actually happened not to long ago

 

me: *shows friend my very bad drawing of a human body diagram for my bio class* 

friend: is that your dream man?

me: *blinks in “dream people do not exist for me”*

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Sol the Mighty

Remembered another moment: 

I didn't understand what sex was until I was 14. I didn't know what masturbation was until 15. And I googled both and read smut online multiple times, and still didn't get it! 

Until the realization within the middle of reading some smut and going "Wait a minute..."

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AroAce Wolf

Here's something I remember: 

 

I was talking to my aunt on the phone who asked "Have you found yourself a man yet?" I replied, "No, not interested". Then she says "OH, you're interested in women then?" 

 

My first answer clearly wasn't clear enough since she just assumed I was "interested in women" instead. So I had to explain to her that I simply wasn't interested in anyone, dating or finding a partner PERIOD. To which she replied "Aw, that sounds lonely. Everybody needs somebody" Blah blah. Then, she tried to convince me I'm depressed because, "no one wants to be alone like that".

 

(So you're "alone" even if you have, for example, close friends and family in your life? People make it seem like you're "alone" and must be "lonely" or "depressed" if you don't have a partner. It's as if other people in your life who are there for you, support you, spend time with you, love you, etc don't count or something. People still see you as "alone", "lonely", or "depressed" as long as you don't have a partner.

 

So I just switched subjects because I was completely done talking about that. The conversation wouldn't have gone anywhere.

 

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mercaesan

I had an aromantic moment yesterday.

Talking about someone getting married at 23...

Person A: "That's pretty young, she's only a year older than us."

Me: "Yeah, I don't see myself getting married in the next year."

Person B: "I was just thinking that, I absolutely cannot picture you in a relationship, lol, it just wouldn't fit."

Me: "Neither can I, to be honest."

I don't think anyone's ever directly said that to me before? Someone kind of picked up that I'm aromantic? I've never come out to anyone but honestly it felt good in a way that someone noticed this.

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On 5/9/2022 at 3:07 AM, mercaesan said:

I had an aromantic moment yesterday.

Talking about someone getting married at 23...

Person A: "That's pretty young, she's only a year older than us."

Me: "Yeah, I don't see myself getting married in the next year."

Person B: "I was just thinking that, I absolutely cannot picture you in a relationship, lol, it just wouldn't fit."

Me: "Neither can I, to be honest."

I don't think anyone's ever directly said that to me before? Someone kind of picked up that I'm aromantic? I've never come out to anyone but honestly it felt good in a way that someone noticed this.

This is happens to me too ! It took me quite a time to accept myself as aromantic, whereas people around me where like : "yeah, you never liked romance, anyway"

 

WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME BEFORE

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I've recently discovered the real meaning of something that happened years ago. That was friendship, but I still could't understand it.

 

Someday, a girl that I barely knew gave me a paper and that she had found it on the ground, and that is was for me. The paper said 

"Do you want to be my friend ? - Yes - No"

Later, the same girl came to me and asked me what my answer was. And I was just like...

It's just a paper on the ground. How can I know who wanted to give it to me ? I can't know if I can befriend them !

 

Aaaand I just realised that the girl what actually trying to become my friend in a gentle way. I think I'm just not understanding everything that comes to social interactions. :')

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