Guest member25959 Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 (edited) FIUSM (the Student Media department of Florida International University) posted an article titled "So what's asexuality exactly?" yesterday evening (8:21PM CET, March 23rd) ... So what’s asexuality exactly?Jennipher Schafer/Staff WriterThere is an unnoticed group in the queer community which is often misunderstood and even forgotten. The queer community includes everyone who is not strictly heterosexual. Often the focus is made to gay and lesbian individuals, though recently transgendered issues have been more open. Still, the asexual population is ignored in favor of the more sexually charged images of the LGBTQ community.So what exactly does it mean to be asexual? This is a tricky thing to define because asexual people can and do have sex. What The Asexual Visibility and Education Network defines asexuality to be is “someone who does not experience sexual attraction. Unlike celibacy, which people choose, asexuality is an intrinsic part of who we are.”So if they experience no sexual attraction why do some asexual people have sex? The answers are simple enough. Sometimes it is the desire to show their significant other that they want to meet their needs as well. They still feel arousal; it is simply not necessarily directed at anyone in particular such as a romantic partner. Some identify as demi-sexual which means that once a deep connection and trust have been established they can become aroused by a partner even if they are not romantically involved. Still others are gray-asexual which means that they are between asexuality and sexuality, for example because they experience sexual attraction very rarely, only under specific circumstances, or of an extremely low intensity that is almost (or completely) ignorable.Asexual people can also identify as hetero-romantic, homo-romantic, bi-romantic, or pan-romantic as well. This means that even though sex is not the basis for their attraction they still can feel love and a desire for companionship. Many asexual people still want close relationships and even love. Sex has never been the sole way to express love and so even if a sexual person finds love with an asexual partner there are many ways to express the emotions which do not involve sex.Some asexual people enjoy small contacts such as hand holding or cuddling to be satisfying means of communicating their love. If you find yourself dating someone who identifies as asexual it is best not to pressure them about sex. If your partner does open up to you sexually make sure that not only was it their decision, but that you understand what this means. Make your partner comfortable. Several asexual people I know have said immediately after any sexual act they need to wash and dress. It helps to feel less uncomfortable and in some cases reminds them they are not being objectified for the act.Asexual people can make wonderful romantic partners. There is nothing wrong with them. In fact, many of us could learn a thing or two about how to love our partners every day without sex being the ultimate goal. Edited April 7, 2014 by Arca nine Huggles 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Star Bit Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 This person needs to know where to put their punctuation; namely in the 3rd and 4th paragraphs. I know I'm not perfect with it either, and yet I'm the one noticing it. And this is from a paper; even if it is a student paper, it needs to be presentable. I can see her mentioning "even if they are not romantically involved" at the end of the demisexual sentence confusing to readers. She needed at least one more sentence on that subject. I dislike the phrasing "some [as in theres also a good amount who dont] asexual people enjoy small contacts[as if we have touch aversion]" in reference to non sexual romantic physical contact in the 4th paragraph. I'm not hating, I'm just being nitpicky. Yes, i know any spread of the knowledge of Asexuality is great. I'm not saying this isn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolf(e) Posted March 26, 2014 Share Posted March 26, 2014 At least there weren't any glaring spelling or grammar mistakes that took away from the article. It is a great article but I understand wanting better construction in anything written. Glad asexuality is being discussed in college settings too, sometimes it feels like the college is portrayed as "drink, party, sex, drink, party, sex, drink... "oh shoot got to study"... drink, party, sex..." you get the picture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaHoward Posted March 27, 2014 Share Posted March 27, 2014 Great find ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Member54880 Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I thought this was a pretty good overview of asexuals and romantic relationships, but it does have some problems, including implying that most asexuals don't like cuddling, and in the third sentence, it should be transgender, not transgendered. I'm not sure how accurate the statements about some asexuals showering immediately after sex to feel less uncomfortable and less objectified is. I know that some asexuals do that, but it has to do with feeling physically grossed out instead, or that's what I understand of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BKAce Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 My problem is that she did to us aromantics what she claims the queer community is doing to asexuals. It's OK not to be romantic and not focus on love relationships... it doesn't make us uncaring monsters that should not be named! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R_1 Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 Nice to know that asexuality is being acknowledged there. Now if only there was something in my college. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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