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  1. Depends on the person like most things do, but in the case of your Clinton and JFK examples, I'd say a lot of it is power and ego. They do it because they can and it feels good and the opportunity arises in terms of many women being available who are willing to have sex with them. As mentioned above, validation. The reason might be similar for many non-famous people. An ego boost. There could be something deeper going on, like they grew up in an atmosphere with emotional needs unmet and at some point as a young adult realised that sex was a very powerful and reliable way to quickly get attenti
  2. WARNING: there will be mentions of abuse/sexual themes, i wont go into detail but if that makes you uncomfortable i suggest not reading honestly i started masturbating very young, around 6. sometimes it makes me wonder if something happened that i dont remember but i keep hearing that its normal for kids to start doing it young so i dont know. i never had any problem with sexual things until 14/15, i just suddenly started getting really sex repulsed and felt so gross after doing it, so i eventually stopped altogether and any urge or desire for anything sexual went away completely.
  3. Hi everyone. My question is for whoever is in the asexual spectrum: would you be more willing to engage in sexual activities, if those activities involve only outercourse and not penetrative sex? Here is why I'm asking: I'm a male in my 20s, still questioning my sexuality. I'm clearly attracted to women, I strongly desire partnership and physical intimacy (kisses, cuddles...), but I have never felt an explicit desire for sex... Almost every stuff related to sex feels somewhat unrelatable. I'm not able to flirt, to initiate, to make my partner feel sexually appreciated. Penetrative
  4. and I don't mean one where you feel the need to masturbate like some aces do, I mean the ones where you feel you need to have sex with a partner(could be anyone whether in a romantic relationship or not). I'm still unsure about libido or no libido or whatever, I might just be at the point in my life where I don't worry about it as much. Some of my peers seem more interested in having sex than others, and it doesn't really matter whether or not they've lost their virginity. But I have been wondering for a while. Anyway, here are my questions: 1. When would you say you started to have a sex
  5. I'm not sure how to answer this exactly, but I remember definitely being curious about the concept of sex and thinking it sounded sort of good when I was about 13. I recall two of my favourite characters in one of my favourite TV shows being in a sex scene and kind of wanting to experience something like that someday. I taped that episode off the television and watched it over and over lol. I didn't actually want to really have sex with anyone yet though, and probably would've been horrified if the opportunity had presented itself. I had some crushes, but I didn't think about sex with these pe
  6. Is feeling the need to masturbate proof you're not a-sexual?
  7. Sarah-Sylvia

    New here and to the realisation

    Hi @Alchemist666 There's a range of how sexual or not people can be, and what we call the asexual spectrum has experiences that aren't strictly asexual but can come close in some ways. Libido is separate and even asexual people can masturbate to alleviate it, but it doesn't mean it translates to sexual attraction/desire. Your husband may have lower libido but since you said that's how it's always been, it might just be how it is for him, and preferring cuddling and other non-sexual physical touch for intimacy is really relatable (as someone graysexual). That's how I identify and I
  8. ianthesmall

    Questioning

    Hi, I have had this question a few years now, but the fact that I feel some form of sexual attraction always throws me off. However, that attraction is always towards fictional characters or ideas etc. I can look at a hot person and think they are attractive but then if I am with them, I don't really feel anything I want from them. I have needs and masturbate but I can't picture myself with someone or anything like that when doing so. Is there a term for this? I also hate romance and intimacy and can't understand wanting it with someone. The invasion of space and privacy and solitu
  9. Matthew_the-ace

    Am I asexual?

    Why am I not like anyone? I’m 16 and about a year into puberty, why am I not like anyone? Why are people so fussed about penis size, what different does it make or what difference is it meant to make? Why do people masturbate, to me its just boring and pointless? I’ve never had a crush is this normal? I have no friends and I am unable to related to anyone, I constantly find myself walking in the corridors at school, I have about 6 nicknames and people keep mocking me with questions such as “Do you jerk off?”
  10. Hi! I've been thinking that I'm asexual, specifically aegosexual because while the idea of sex doesn't appeal ato me, I enjoy reading 18+ content and am attracted to 2d characters (lame, I know), but I keep on tossing up between that and bisexual. The reason is that I can't tell whether or not I'm sexually attracted to someone. So, recently, I've been wondering whether the desire to masturbate has anything to do with asexuality because I've never masturbated in my life and don't ever plan on doing so. Or is that completely unrelated?
  11. Would you (and he) be open to the idea of him having sexual connections with other people? What about you being involved in a more... sensual... way while he masturbates? Like touching and cuddling and whatnot, but you don't have to do anything overtly sexual? Although I'm assuming that might be a no, given you often feel averse to even kissing. Do you think he would be ok with something where he agreed that making out and touching absolutely didn't have to escalate to a handjob/blowjob/intercourse, but he was able to masturbate?
  12. CW: Discussion of masturbation and genitals Hi, So I'm transfemme, ace, and very sex-repulsed. If I do get any bottom surgery, it's gonna be the "zero depth" kind. When thinking about whether or not I should, my gut reaction is "Yes, 100%". In fact I realised recently that if someone (like people operating from a dorm basement) were to force me to do it, I wouldn't even put up a fight. I just want everything there gone. My doubts are more on the practical side of things. I've spoken to other trans women about this, but it seems a more ace perspec
  13. Sarah-Sylvia

    Doubts about bottom surgery (MtF)

    It's a big operation and imo isn't as important as hormones because it's just in your pants, so that's why I say it's good to take your time with it and make sure it's what you want. As for the equipment, I guess I can understand but I think mental arousal is more important than how the parts change, they're reusing the same nerves so you should be fine but I'm not speaking from experience since I haven't been operated that much yet, I can't say I know everything around it. obviously it means learning a different way to masturbate. I guess I would ask how much meaning i
  14. I’m sexual but I don’t masturbate and can’t stand the thought of porn or any sex toys. I love my fiancé more than the air I breathe but I believe that he is asexual so maybe once every few weeks we might have sex. The problem is that I’m very anxious person with very low self esteem who values sex as way of expressing and feeling love from my partner… in saying so I don’t actually know if I’ve ever had and orgasim, and if I had then it’s nothing like I thought it would be so in some way I would consider myself Asexual but then not as I like sex as a form of pure love and reassurance. It d
  15. Yeah that sounds pretty demi to me. For me it's like... ok, there's some sort of attraction there and if it's strong enough I'll want to try to take the connection further. It's pretty much always based on personality/character/some sort of energy they give off, not appearance. I have eyes lol, and I can tell if someone is good-looking, but it never results in a desire to pursue them sexually or romantically or whatever, it's simply a passing mental acknowledgment that's like 'Yep, nice face' or something. 😂 The rest of someone's physique is irrelevant to me, I don't relate to finding bodies a
  16. Hi everyone, I’m new here. This might be a long post so I apologize. There also may be some TMI in here. My husband and I have been married for almost 4 years. We have one child who is a year old. We have not had sex in 16 months. After reading through AVEN and some of the forums here, I truly believe that my husband is asexual, or at least gray-a. When my husband and I first met, he was 27 years old and still a virgin. Our sex life was typical of sexuals in the beginning. We had sex quite a bit. As our relationship developed more and we got more serious, our sex life gradu
  17. WetBirdInTheCorner

    Asexual feeling the need to masturbate

    Hi, well, I'm gonna explain what I mean down here, I really struggled to write a title that kind of sums up what I mean. I am female, 17 years old and asexual. I know that and am feeling the best about it since I realized it. Yet I still feel the need to masturbate, even tho I know that it never felt that good and will not get better even if I try another 1000 times. It feels like my head wants to do it but my body just goes ''nope I don't like that''. I am feeling as if I wasted time every time I finish, and in the past few months I often don't even get to the point, which just le
  18. Sarah-Sylvia

    Do I count?

    Hey @GarfieldGaming0624, I think the most important thing is for you to know that it's ok however you are. You are how you are and that's ok and good. And as long as you enjoy looking at porn and it doesn't prevent you from other things you want in your life then it's not anything to be concerned about. I think a few things to mention is that first of all, asexuals can have libido, and respond physically or masturbate too, it doesn't have to mean more than that. Though that said, sexuality isn't just about seeing someone and wanting sex, even if there's quite a lot of peo
  19. My ex literally would demand me to only masturbate while thinking of him - even when he didn't turn me on at all at first or if I didn't feel anything. People really don't get it that easily.
  20. not necessarily. some asexuals masturbate while some don't, and that's totally okay. the need to masturbate doesn't equal sexual attraction.
  21. jesus dario

    jesus dario

    On January 1, 2006, I received an interview with Carlos Turcker. I told myself above that asexuality was a dream I had. It was an interview broadcast on the KNBC channel where I appeared discussing asexualities. In the interview, I said that I really don't want sex that people asexuals do not think about sex, people have a porn microchip, what a chip I have seen a lot of sex, a lot of sexual content and my imagination is not enough to feel that sexual thought. I can also feel something physically sexual and masturbate and feel that sexual aurosal. asexual people They get to have sexual aurosal. Furthermore, the interview, I was 14 years old, I didn't understand anything about sex, my friends at school talked about sex and love, things like that, but I didn't understand that topic. The interview was something pleasant. This interview was part of my dream. I was in another time. It was the year 2006.

  22. 1. You are not attracted to any sex. This may be the sign where it could be asexual clear asexual people are not sexually attracted to any i.e. if we see someone on a bike or walking in the park that person would not be sexually attractive if not otherwise attractive eg romantically or platonically i.e. asexuals do not want to be sexually attracted if not otherwise. 2. You don't want to have sex Another sign that you might be asexual is not wanting to have sex or participate in it which means that sex is part of our human life rules and advice that you hear at home and at school
  23. cauliSunflower

    Confused about label

    I think, use any label you like, if you want to use one at all. Personally, I go for the question if I feel intrinsic sexual attraction towards another person - no, I don't. Give me the choice, and I will probably never initiate sexual activities with someone because I simply don't think about it. Well, maybe I will, a few times a year, but even then, it's more out of feeling some libido and my beloved partner simply being there when my libido rises and I think, well, now we could do stuff and it would feel pleasant to me and make him happy, so why not. If he wasn't there, I'd prob
  24. I'm a man, 24 years old. I'm in an "quasi" relationship, which will be my first. I've known this girl for a long time but it was only around the middle of last year that we started to get closer, until we kissed a few times and eventually we evolved into this almost serious relationship that we have. The problem is that I have never been able to understand myself sexually, in addition to having a lot of problems with anxiety and panic. Very, very ordinary things make me uncomfortable, like going out together. I never show that I'm awkward or anxious, but it's as if every time I wan
  25. Hi! So, this is probably going to be all over the place and full of mistakes (english is not my first language). Anyway, some context - I've identified as bissexual for a while because I figured out I felt a similar way when kissing multiple genders and yould date someone I like regardless of gender. I've never dated anyone, but I've kissed many people and I find it to be fun. But I've never had sex even though I like reading about sexual themes, kinks, etc. In my head, sex is like about the pleasure you can give someone you care about a lot, or about the trust to be
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