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  2. Darth Plagueis the Wise

    But... Am I asexual?

    Sounds like you might be demisexual to me.
  3. firewallflower

    Red, Green, Blue, RAINBOW GOATS!

    Zero.
  4. firewallflower

    Quickly, Before They See!

    25
  5. disGraceful

    But... Am I asexual?

    I have never had any desire to masturbate, my libido is so low. I don’t get anything out of porn or erotica. When I’m not in a relationship, the thought of sex never even comes up. I think I’ve had... 4? Maybe 5? Crushes in my 26 years. I don’t find that many strangers “hot” and when I do, the idea of sex with them just creeps me out. I don’t understand the appeal in one night stands, either. But with my partner, I enjoy sex. I love being intimate. I like trying new things in the bedroom. It makes me feel closer to him and loved. Physically, it feels nice but I’m rarely able to orgasm. Tell me honestly - Do you think I’m ace... or something else? Asking for a friend.
  6. Scottthespy

    tired of being told im not ace

    Honestly? Most of them are probably trying to comfort you. I know that sounds stupid, but in their minds sex is great, and not getting sex is awful, and they don't connect the dots that not getting sex that you don't want isn't actually awful. So they just hear 'I'm not sexing because reason' and assure you that it won't be that way forever, you'll get to experience the joys of sex some day, don't worry. Alternatively, I've met people who don't believe that you don't want sex, they believe you think you cant get any. That you think you're ugly, or have been dumped a few times, or whatever, and when you say 'no, I really don't want it' they hear 'I'm trying desperately to convince myself that I don't want it', and feel sympathy. Its irritating to deal with, but your best bet is to roll your eyes and say 'I guess we'll see.' and then try to change the subject.
  7. ColeHW

    Teen Corner

    All my friends talked about was anime and life.
  8. disGraceful

    Tea!

    When people say black tea... what kind?
  9. Evren

    Tea!

    Peppermint. I used to love all kinds of black tea, however I became "allergic" (it makes me very sick) to caffeine and can no longer have black tea.
  10. Evren

    Evren

    How to describe beauty, bravery, and wonder.

     

     

  11. Muledeer

    Tea!

    I like iced tea. Specifically, Lipton instant (powdered) tea mixed slightly weak, with no lemon or sugar.
  12. All "new" things are temporary. Luckily, the desire for your partner stays (generally) and the only thing boring is the activity itself... cause its same old. So, occasionally adding a new and cycling around favorites is usually quite enough. In my family? Yes, I do, actually. My family has few secrets - I know who is sleeping with who, what they like, my mom has shown me hickies and my Uncle tells me about his sex life. I also know who fights and who doesnt. You do realize having sexual attraction and desire for your partner is not the same as basing it on sexual attraction, right? Cause, atm, you are coming off as a bit of an anti-sexual elitist. And also projecting a ... what, bad parent experience (guessing thats the two dysfunctional ones you have to live with?) onto literally every sexual person and their relationships. It is entirely possible to have a loving, long term, sexual relationship that is monogamous. It is about finding a compatible person, same as any relationship.
  13. Read "Grassroots Post-Modernism: Remaking the Soil of Cultures", by Gustavo Esteva and Madhu Suri-Prakash. I read the 1998 edition.
  14. CajunAce

    tired of being told im not ace

    Maybe say THEY'RE too young to know their sexuality just yet. It's just something that's always been there, though it takes some longer to realize than others. And when is the right time? 32? When I get married? It's all BS
  15. Dreamer23

    If you were God, what would you do?

    I'd make a hot dog so hot I couldn't eat it, then try and see if I could eat it. Gotta set priorities with that kind of power, and that's definitely number one!
  16. Darth Plagueis the Wise

    Asexual Men Statistics(for science)

    I was honestly expecting a question on porn and masturbation to be in the poll (becuase it seems like every other male in my school is addicted to both).
  17. CajunAce

    CajunAce

    Random deep thought #379015:  It’s not brave to follow your friends over the cliff and into the dark unknown. Stupidity labeled bravery is only a cheap farce

  18. Dreamer23

    Has anyone else thought about making video games?

    Have you participated in GameJams before (where you spend a weekend to meet people with similar ambitions and make tiny games in a weekend) It's a great way to meet other aspiring game devs and get started! It's also not super unrealistic to develop it over weekends, even while holding a regular job. Now granted as you mentioned, you won't make a triple-A game that way, but without a massive team and at least tens of millions of dollars, that's not gonna happen. There are amazing Indie Games out there - fancy graphics and massive manually curated worlds are what makes money, but I strongly assume not what you are all that interested in creating anyway (since it's kinda boring from a dev perspective), and that's a good part of what requires those large teams and time --> give the scrappy approach a shot!
  19. Darth Plagueis the Wise

    Intuitive repulsion

    From my experience I can look back at something a few weeks later and realize that someone is attracted to me, but I can’t tell in the moment. Everything is easier for me to see when I am looking back at something, even though I really shouldn’t need to take as long as I do to realize (I was friends with a girl that I’m pretty sure was attracted to me for all of 9th grade, and I only realized near the end of that summer). I’d probably feel repulsion if something got sexual though.
  20. CBC

    Intuitive repulsion

    Well, people behave in certain ways when they're into someone, but if the feelings aren't reciprocated, it's quite likely going to feel somewhat uncomfortable -- for anyone, regardless of whether they're asexual or not. I might hazard a guess that a higher percentage of asexuals have difficulty reading some of the social cues indicating attraction, in comparison to the percentage of sexual people, so maybe those asexuals just pick up on a vibe of... something feels weird/different here... before clueing in. Just speculation, though. Obviously not applicable to all asexuals.
  21. hello everyone. as you know, i’m tired of being told i’m not ace because of my age. when i tell people i’m ace (which is not at all often, but has happened) i commonly hear some mixture of “you’re too young to be ace,” “you’ll want sex when you’re older,” and “no one really wants sex at your age.” like, maybe i’m not ace, but what gives you the right to decide for me? you don’t know exactly how i feel (or rather, what i don’t feel). you can’t know if my thoughts are enough to point towards being ace, or if they’ll change when i age. it’s possible i’m a late bloomer, but it’s also possible i got lucky and found my identity early on. why do you have to challenge it, instead of just letting me use the label that i believe fits? also, “no one really wants sex at your age” is a total lie. i know many girls my age that have had sex and i know the majority of them want it, even if they don’t act on it. i’m sorry, karen, but youth these days aren’t as innocent as you lead yourself to believe.
  22. ErmiREALLYdontknow

    i hate being ace sometimes

    I think we all get that sometimes, whether your gender or sexuality. You really aren't alone, I know that is so stereotypical to say but its true. Don't hate yourself for being ace when we are all in this together *Cue the music*. Okay anyway, sorry I try to be funny but fail. Okay anyway, if you are having a lot of trouble embracing and realize that it isn't because of the assholes then you could be grey-ace. But otherwise, you just need to try to block them out. Cause the only one who knows is you, no one can say what you identify as. Sorry for the cringy response 😕
  23. Do you ever get a bad feeling from certain people? Like not based off anything in particular but you feel anxious and can’t be yourself around them? Only to find out later they are attracted (sexually?) to you. I feel like I have this intuition but I have no idea what I’m picking up on so I feel bad for keeping my distance from the person for no specific reason.
  24. Antsy

    Is it me or him. In denial?

    Thanks for the responses. Sally, I think I need to know if it is me or him. I came out of a relationship where my husband clearly wanted other women over me so the self confidence is low. If he is in fact demisexual and it is not just me that doesn't 'turn him on' then I can accept that. But if he finds a different 'type' does turn him on, then I have to question whether our relationship is the full package and whether we should be together - am I just going to get hurt again when someone he is actually sexually attracted to comes along. As a supposedly neurotypical woman, I like to think my partner is sexually attracted to me. If it is innate in him not to be overly attracted to any woman then it is not a deal breaker and I can accept that is who he is. But if it is me he is not attracted to, then that is a different story. I mean, if you love someone and you are heterosexual, then you would surely show some interest in the female bits that sit below the neck without being prompted? He says he finds sex boring and I can see he separates love and sex - maybe many men do.
  25. what the face

    THE GAME OF LOVE

    OK Today a dropped into a walk/hiking meditation while ascending and descending a mountain near my home. Love of the earth and rain and trees. Thank you all (I think I won this game)
  26. Today
  27. Well to the first question, I'd say something like... compatible ways of feeling and expressing love (and to a good extent, compatible ways of experiencing life in general), open and honest communication, willingness to be vulnerable, and trust. I also feel like a relationship should make you feel like and be the healthiest and most authentic version of yourself. If you're not fully being you, what the hell is the point? That's kind of... toxic. Sometimes more insidiously than very obviously.
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