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  2. So this is where the Rolling Stones got their reputation from https://images.app.goo.gl/cTTnYtwnVijhXoE89 Reference the OP. It's an interesting analogy, and if it works for you, fine. As my tabby cat likes to lick my forehead to wake me up, and many animals lick their owners I hope this isn't too literal
  3. LICKOLOGY πŸ˜‚ I actually died.
  4. tiliflip

    How do I know for sure?

    Perhaps this is not a question you should be asking until you have more exposure to the world. Currently you do not have enough information to arrive at a reliable conclusion about it. Questioning is wonderful but timing is important. An alien landing on this planet may well ask ''what is a flower?'' ..... the answer will become apparent in the Spring. In all probability it's unlikely you will leave your teens without wanting to be affectionate with someone ... I preferred my books until I was nearly 17 it's a 'wait and see' kind of thing. If you reach your 20's and still feel ambivalent then probably that's the time to explore your question further? Romance is wonderful but marriage requires far more - friendship, shared likes/dislikes, similar goals and expectations ... My own tradition does not go as far as arranged marriages but many cultures do and who is to say that those marriages don't have a better chance of longer-term success that arrangements where the couple's families don't know each other and may be vastly different in outlook, status and focus? If that's your family tradition, it may not be romantic but it isn't unreasonable. Parents generally want their children to be happy, fulfilled and comfortable, sometimes they make the mistake of thinking they can arrange this without consulting their children .... we should take this into consideration and be kind to them without surrendering our individual needs. Like yours, my mother's mother did not prepare her for menstruation or explain the reasons behind it ... this could just have been embarrassment on her part; your mother's reasons could be embarrassment, cultural, generational, who knows ... but you are intelligent enough to find the information you need, in a library or online, without perusing it with her and perhaps making her feel inadequate as well? Take care and be joyful.
  5. Slice of Ace

    Homoromantic guys chat

    Fine, thanks ☺ I've been doing multiple videos per week to build up a backlog so I don't have to worry about missing a video in my first couple of weeks at work. Also, once I get settled, I'm going to start dating again, which should give me something to talk about on the channel.
  6. Dreamsexual

    Wanting sex as a asexual

    *sigh* Just when I think I'm out of definition debates ... You drag me back in ... It confused me for two main reasons: a) 'wanting' is far too broad. What if I 'want' sex to please my sexual partner, curiosity, to make money, etc etc. b) 'other person' is too broad. If I, as an animistic robopsychesexual, have an active sex life with robot persons it seems ridiculous to still classify me as 'asexual' - it does a huge disrespectful service to 'real' asexuals to include people with clear and obvious, if odd, realised sex drives imho. Which is why I prefer my own definition which avoids these issues.
  7. CBC

    Wanting sex as a asexual

    Honestly the way AVEN tries to define it, I get lost on the concept. I understand finding someone aesthetically attractive (which certainly doesn't automatically equate to wanting sex), I understand an overall sense of attraction to a person for who they are (which I'm sure is what romantic aces experience as well), I understand everything from fleeting minor crushes to being in love with someone who makes you feel like maybe "soulmates" isn't silly BS after all, I understand libido, I understand wanting sex as a way to be intimate and express feelings for someone... and so on. What the hell this "sexual attraction" thing is though, AVEN has me lost.
  8. @aquariusabandoned welcome to Aven. You've had to go through a lot, I'm sorry.
  9. Sally

    Wanting sex as a asexual

    I think it's because they get hung up with the bloody "sexual attraction" business, and they have no idea what that means. (Who could, if you're actually asexual?)
  10. ColeHW

    Homoromantic guys chat

    Ya. So how has your channel been going?
  11. Slice of Ace

    Homoromantic guys chat

    It goes through waves of quietness and business, depending on what people are talking about. I've been busy lately, hence my absence.
  12. ColeHW

    Homoromantic guys chat

    This thread is pretty quiet huh?
  13. CBC

    Wanting sex as a asexual

    I'm with ya there, yup. I mean, not in that particular experience, but in your definition. Another one of those things that's bleedingly obvious to me, but seems so complicated to many. πŸ€·πŸΌβ€β™€οΈ
  14. Slice of Ace

    Coming out as Biromantic?

    Hmm, that's interesting, but I doubt that I have a satisfactory answer for you. I just don't feel anything towards women. Men can be cute, hot, or handsome. Women are just... meh (sorry). The only way I can judge a woman's appearance is by crossreferencing with what others have called attractive, really. And I don't feel anything if a woman pays me any attention. But if a guy's into me, I get butterflies and feel excited. Also, physiology does play a part in it. Sure, I don't care for genitals, but that's not the only difference between men and women. I still like men's bodies whereas women are just... well meh (sorry again. No offence to any women. You're awesome. I just can't see attractiveness in females πŸ˜…) I don't know if that explains it very well. There's just something that feels unequivocally right about a gay relationship. Believe me, it's not a choice or preference, because I wouldn't choose homophobia and a further reduced dating pool over 'normality'. I hope that some of that made a smidgen of sense.
  15. Sally

    Wanting sex as a asexual

    It needn't be. I don't want sex with anyone. I've never wanted sex with anyone. I had sex, but because my loving partner wanted it, not because I wanted sex as sex. That, to me, is asexuality.
  16. ColeHW


    I wanted to grow my own tea plants before but I don’t have enough money or space just yet.
  17. For millenia, humanoid creatures have had sex with each other, and after many hundreds of thousands of years, became desirous of having mates whom they loved, not just had sex with. It isn't "our" culture, and it isn't forced upon us, and what many/most of us experience are not awful games. I'm sorry you feel that way, but do not claim that your feelings are those of all humans.
  18. That's not at all what Homer said. He didn't say that all humans were the cause of the problem; he said that "the only way to save this planet is to eradicate mankind." The damage is done and is rising exponentially. A new study appearing in the American Association for the Advancement of Science says that by the end of this century, the oceans will have risen 12 feet. The previous estimate was 6 feet. I'm taking a course given by an emeritus science professor at the University of Washington; he told us today that atmospheric scientists have said the accurate phrase is "climate catastrophe", not climate change. It is undeniable that capitalism caused this catastrophe; however, they will continue on that path because the political will does not exist to stop, and they own the political will. All that being the case, what Homer said is true.
  19. Today
  20. CBC

    Wanting sex as a asexual

    Ah, a true question for the ages...
  21. CustardCream

    Combine your username with the username above you

    Custlyn [My phone auto corrected that to Cuddly!]
  22. Flag? We've already got the pride march organised. Sponsored by MrWhippy and Ben&Jerry's. Join us
  23. Sally

    Wanting sex as a asexual

    Why? What is confusing about it?
  24. Dreamsexual

    Wanting sex as a asexual

    Don't go there ... . That definition confused me for ages ...
  25. InDefenseOfPOMO

    Biology, culture, and sexuality

    And where I have lived my entire life, the United States of America, we oversimplify it. It is probably the same throughout all of contemporary Western civilization. Human sexuality is now overwhelmingly "having sex", and "having sex" is overwhelmingly about the personal fulfillment of individuals and in the name of liberation the defiance of long-established norms. I grimace whenever I hear people say "have sex", "had sex", "having sex", etc. It reduces human sexuality to marginal, isolated episodes of a package of a sequence of acts. What acts are included in that package varies with cultural environment, yet we insist that it is entirely biological. It never occurs to us, as far as I can tell, that human sexuality could be a seamless, continuous biological and cultural phenomenon and that when we break it up into "having sex" we are doing nothing more than acting out our own particular culture. To say that when we break it up into "having sex" we are representing objective reality and that the best tool ever for knowledge of reality, science, supports us may be some of the most extreme ethnocentrism that can be found. If we were to step back and consider the possibility that human sexuality is far more than "having sex" according to instructions from our genes, what would be doing? We would be looking at it more holistically. In previous posts I tried to suggest that we are deluding ourselves when we say that things like the Sexual Revolution have liberated us and made our relationships more fulfilling. A more holistic approach to relationships would result in people having better relationships in numbers and in quality than ever before, I tried to suggest. None of the responses have been very convincing otherwise. Speaking subjectively for my own self, true liberation would mean never again having to worry about "having sex".
  26. Bloc

    a gender positive thread

    I am not sure if I should take hormones. But I can totally relate to this. I've a strong feeling that I would present much more butch if I would be taking hormones for a while as I would not have to compensate for a body which is too masculine. Your description of your outfit sounds like you are rocking a great outfit.
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