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corrupt the wish above.


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Granted, but it always dyes your clothes a muddy brown color.

I wish I could rock climb.

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Waist of Thyme

Granted, but other people can't hear them.

I wish dinosaurs could meow.

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Granted, but you'd have tiny little arms in proportion to your legs, like a T-rex.

I wish I had one of those Sodastream machines.

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Granted, but you will end up spending $1000s a year on replacing flavours and fizz maker tubes

I wish for the fridge to shut up

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Granted, it's so terribly broken that it doesn't do anything, including make noise.

I wish my adipose stress toy would come to life.

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Granted, but then it would get beamed back to the mother ship

I wish the TARDIS would crash in my backyard

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Granted, but not if you lived in the south pole, it be coldy-pooh... and to compound matters, your neighbour would be The Pesky Eskimole, known as the South Mole and related by mole droppings to the Uk's Very Pesky Mole.

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Cakey has omitted to make a wish. I will make a wish for her.

Cakey wishes to be invited to be on the judging panel for The X Factor.

Granted , Cakey, but you have to sit next to Simon Cowell. :)

I wish I could sprout wings and fly.

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Granted, but they're made of sprouts and you only fly when you get gas. :D

I wish my hot flushes would go away. :(

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My dear, ensure your plumber fixes the toilet cistern to the cold tap !

I want to be a millionaire.............. yes, shallow I know !

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Granted but you get sued into the ground and soon lose every penny. :P

I wish to travel the world!

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Granted, but you do need to keep an eye on things and constantly monitor everything, what you need is Travelers Cheques Checks.

I want to marry someone with good financial acumen and a proven track record of excellent financial management?

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You will, a whole pound.

I wish to win first prize in the lottery.

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Granted, but so does the rest of the world, so you have to share.

I wish university was over.

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Granted, but you will have learned nothing and leave without your degree.

I wish for Aston Villa to win the Premiership.

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They will but in the same year Blues will win europe.

I wish I only needed 2 hours sleep per 24 hours.

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I really, really, wish that, Mole's weren't so PESKY (I said Eskimos, not Pesky Moles)
I grant you 2 hours sleep per 24 hours, but to maintain this, you also have to pay the penalty of having 22 hours sleep every 24 hours, are you pleased Mr Pesky Mole?


I have got an addiction to saying the word Pesky, can you help?

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Granted, but you're now hooked on the word "Pestiferous".

I wish I wasn't good at procrastinating.

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Waist of Thyme

Granted, but you're now not good at what you were procrastinating on.

I wish fish could breathe in space.

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Granted. They've always been able to, but will never find that out.

I wish it was raining.

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Waist of Thyme

Granted, but it rains so much that the planet is flooded.

I wish volcanoes erupted with tomato sauce instead of lava.

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Granted, but a spacefish has stolen the entire world's supply of pasta, so now you'll have to put tomato sauce on ice-cream instead.

I wish I had a cat.

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SamStartsARiot

Granted, but the cat is made of bubbles and every time it meows or tries to rub against you another one pops.

I wish to be the best at all things theatre related.

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Waist of Thyme

Granted, but you're the worst in all things not theatre related.

I wish pandas could speak every language.

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Granted, but they never have anything interesting to talk about. All they ever say is "panda panda panda panda panda" (or equivalent in every language).

I wish there were more trees along some of the streets around here.

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Granted, but they are dead

I wish Ben Gibbard (singer from Death Cab for Cutie) was my English teacher!!

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