What does the urge to masturbate feel like? [TMI?]

[Gengar]

This is so weird for me to ask. I know it's probably a /really/ hard thing to describe but I'm curious. Like does it itch or is it a different feeling all together? I'm twenty and I don't know if I've ever even had the urge to do so before but I was hoping maybe you guys could give me a little insight?

[Anime Pancake]

Hm, I'm a guy so my own experience on the matter would not be relative to a girl's perspective, unfortunately, lol

[Gengar]

Oh yeah, I guess that's true haha

[Don't Sex Me Bro]

MAJOR TMI WARNING

For me, it starts with a dull ache, followed by involuntary spasms, followed by a warm liquid feeling (it's not urine). This is all situated locally in my pelvic area.

:redface:

[Zerο]

Boredom?

[LionRoar]

TMI. How do I put this under a TMI cut?

Why isn't a male's experience relevant?

I am male, and my experience of masturbatory desires is usually associated with a certain set of thoughts -- not sexual, but about something that in real life I find really repulsive, and am embarrassed to say.

What happens is that I just have this irresistible urge to rub my penis against the bed, even if I really don't want to (for various reasons that I don't need to get into now). There's just sort of tension all over that's otherwise unresolvable.

[Touchofinsight]

Its like any other compulsion... its just... an urge generally followed by a massive blood flow to my groin which annoys the crap out of me at times and other times is pleasurable (just the urge were talking about here).

[Veeri]

Oh geez.... :redface:

Imagine that there's something you can do that makes you feel really good all over, but centered around your center. So for at least a few minutes, you can do something to make yourself feel blissfully good and excited so much that it blocks out all thought, better than you've ever felt in your life doing anything else. And then once you're done, you'll feel relaxed and happy and kind of sleepy.

Then imagine you're laying in bed, but you're not really tired yet, but you know you need to get to sleep as fast as you can so you can get up early the next day. You're kind of bored and staring at the ceiling, and you feel this twinge in your genitals, suddenly, like blood just pumped really hard through a vein down there. Kind of pleasant, but urging. So you have two options from there. Get to it, and start going up the rollercoaster. Or try to ignore it, and deal with that twinging for the rest of the night until you either give in and take care of it, or manage to distract yourself long enough that it eventually dies down on its own. If you let it die down on its own, though, you'll be left with a vague unsatisfied feeling afterwards.

There's a reason it's been compared to a drug.

[NinjaRobot]

My downstairs area gets kinda antsy. It's hard to describe... But you know how when you've been sitting down a while and your legs need to stretch? Well, it's sort of a similar feeling, only downstairs. But that doesn't often happen to me. Usually I masturbate when I'm daydreaming at night, for no good reason other than I can, although often I'll masturbate because I'm aroused by a fetish, though I don't think that's what you're asking about... But I may as well talk about that too.

If I'm aroused, sometimes I'll get wet, which I absolutely hate. But mostly it feels like a sort of tenderness, and I can feel my pulse there. Not by touching it, just by being able to feel it. I'm bad at explaining things...

[Senseofwonder94]

Just out of interest: does anyone here use meditation or self-hypnosis to get rid of the the urge mentally without giving in to it physically? Should there be more information available on how to do this, e.g. visualization courses etc.?

Others described the feeling as "antsy" and I think I can agree with that. But I also like to think that I´m still somehow in command of the ants, if I really focus on them. Masturbation is for me more like a "tool" to (rarely) clear my mind and to focus on more important things than "little ants" and thus I like to be in command of it.

Sophie

[Mad]

Well, it does kinda feel like an itch and I kinda feel the urge to get rid of it, but then I remember it brings me no pleasure and it just goes away most of the time.

[Lia]

Moved to Asexual Musings and Rantings

Lia

Asexual Q&A Mod

[Xavy]

For its not an urge, more like a conscious thought that goes like this : humm ... it's been a while, maybe I should masturbate just to make sure things are still working in case i ever need it.

Since I am a guy, I guess this would not be very helpful.

[Motso]

When I do feel the urge to masturbate, and I give in to it, I feel like crap afterwards. Like I just lost something that I can never get back. Maybe there is a way to stop the urge through meditation its really annoying.

[Veeri]

Just out of interest: does anyone here use meditation or self-hypnosis to get rid of the the urge mentally without giving in to it physically? Should there be more information available on how to do this, e.g. visualization courses etc.?

Others described the feeling as "antsy" and I think I can agree with that. But I also like to think that I´m still somehow in command of the ants, if I really focus on them. Masturbation is for me more like a "tool" to (rarely) clear my mind and to focus on more important things than "little ants" and thus I like to be in command of it.

Sophie

Why would you want to? Unless you're just really religious, really uncomfortable with your body/sexuality, or have some medical thing going on. It makes you feel good, it helps you sleep, it has good medical effects on the body, and if you do it right, usually it doesn't even take that long. Why not just do it? It takes longer to meditate than it does to just masturbate, so if the goal is being in control of yourself, why not just choose the most effective method of dispelling your hormones?

[BannedForSatire]

When I do feel the urge to masturbate, and I give in to it, I feel like crap afterwards. Like I just lost something that I can never get back. Maybe there is a way to stop the urge through meditation its really annoying.

I used to feel that way too sometimes. I felt dumb. Like, what was the point of doing that? But when I started actually having real sex of my own free will the bad feelings went away. I think I mostly felt bad because I knew it was something other people would shame me for since I was in a conservative Christian environment. Once I found a partner that was willing to do things with me to make me feel good and satisfied I felt like my partner was validating my feelings and my actions.

As for how the desire to masturbate feels...

I guess I would say that it's a "warm" feeling and like others have said, it's like blood rushing through that area but for me it's more like a psychological thing. I'm not sure how to describe that. It kind of feels the same psychologically as an itch does in your mind. It's like you just want to get the feeling over with most of the time. But sometimes, it's nice to be with desire if you have the time and privacy. I've only had a few orgasms I would describe as "amazing" but I remember them distinctly as making me feel very warm all over and very dizzy and made me feel like my whole body was tingly in a good way. I know this will sound silly but the best orgasm I ever had made me feel like the other person was a god. It made me rethink my whole life because it was such a powerful emotional feeling. Having said that, I don't know if I'd ever want to have an orgasm THAT powerful again. Yeah, it felt good, VERY good, but at the same time feeling something that intense was kind of scary but I think that's more because it was combined with my love for that person rather than the physical act of having an orgasm alone.

[ScorchedEarth]

Sometimes it just hits me like a brick, where I'll get an erection out of nowhere and it takes like 10 minutes for it to finally cease. Other times it'll just be me thinking to myself "Might as well get it out of the way now, so that it doesn't bother me later"

[Guest]

As a guy, it's pretty much just a load of built up pressure/tenseness in my body in general. I feel distracted and frustrated...I can't really focus on anything and I feel kinda irritable.

I masturbate and I feel more physically relaxed afterwards. It comes with feelings of guilt/disappointment too, for whatever reason, but eh...

[Gengar]

Wow thank you guys for such informative answers!

I really don't think I've felt a feeling like the ones you've described - or at least not as strongly.

[tuvok]

I have masturbated since I was a kid. I don't have to.

I don't know if I want to but when it is late and I am still awake I know how to fall asleep in 5 minutes of intense concentration.

I am not ashamed of it. I don't think anyone frown upon it. So I see no reason to stop.

I do get more enjoyment out of it when it's been a while and that makes me look forward to it but most it's about as exciting as any other bodily function.

If I don't masturbate regularly I tend to get random erections at unwanted situations.

[Senseofwonder94]

Why would you want to? Unless you're just really religious, really uncomfortable with your body/sexuality, or have some medical thing going on. It makes you feel good, it helps you sleep, it has good medical effects on the body, and if you do it right, usually it doesn't even take that long. Why not just do it? It takes longer to meditate than it does to just masturbate, so if the goal is being in control of yourself, why not just choose the most effective method of dispelling your hormones?

Well, I think there are a lot of people here who feel quite unhappy after getting rid of the urge "the usual (sexual/physical) way". And it´s everyones free choice to feel happy or unhappy with masturbation, I don´t see one or the other as a sign for any kind of problem, just as personal facets of different personalities. So if people who are unhappy with the "usual way" could learn to use a different technique, then why not?

It may not be the best, quickest, and most effective method, but if someone can say in the end "I made a difference this time and it makes me feel good in a different way" then it´s her or his own decision.

Sophie

[Oskar]

It comes with feelings of guilt/disappointment too, for whatever reason, but eh...

I get this too. were you ever told as a child that playing with yourself was wrong or naughty? I'm thinking its a subconscious throwback thing.

[Valex]

I forgot what it's called,but when I bother to masturbate I don't think of anything in particular. It's odd,like I can't concentrate then I'll get distracted by the television then I just get bored lol

[AceAnon]

The urge is mostly boredom or for relaxation for me. When I'm busy I tend to just forget about it, though.

[bedlam ?]

I have nothing to add, but I salute you all for either making this thread or replying to it!
/has been curious to what this sort of thing feels like

[Cimmerian]

Physically, on the days when the urge is stronger and more noticeable, it's like the persistent feeling you get when something itches; you are suddenly super-aware of it and the area's demand for contact. I saw someone mentioned it feels kind of like a twinge; I think that's very accurate too. A twinge that tenses just slightly and can get a little more constant if you act on the feeling.

Most of the time though it's just a slight twinge feeling that is not overly noticeable unless the area gets brushed against or something.

On a more mental level it's the desire to experience a slight pleasant, shivery sensation for whatever short amount of time. Just the reaction of, "Hm, well that's okay/kind of nice," or "Let's make it easier to fall asleep." There isn't any ultimate end pleasure, beyond being slightly tired afterward, that I've ever found from it.

[WhenSummersGone]

For me it's just mostly being really aroused and I need to release it. It's really annoying so if you don't experience it be glad because I'm jealous lol. I can also do it when I'm bored or just for the hell of it.

[Maledicte]

For me, it happens in my sleep. If I consciously think of masturbating I can never get anywhere, but occasionally in my sleep I'll just turn over and start grinding.

Feels awfully good, though. Like putting a q-tip in my ear and rubbing it around.

Only between my legs. And without the q-tip. It's weird.

[ithaca]

Moving from Asexual Musings and Rantings to The Gray Area, Sex and Related Discussion.

[TheAspieBaker]

For me it's the most unwelcome, most irritating and unpleasant feeling in the world. Like that feeling you get when you have to pee? It's like that, but twice as annoying. It's a feeling that hits me right around the crack of dawn for whatever reason... I'm still drowsy, and I just want to get the deed over with so I can go back to sleep... I really don't seem to get the 'pleasure aspect of it... You're rubbing your fingers in and out your nether regions, how much fun could one possibly have doing that..? Plus... don't get me started on the mess... it's so nasty.... XP