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#AsexualProblems


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When you have a big crush on someone but you have no idea if they'd date an ace person. 

 

At times I wanna pull a Tommy Wiseau and ask them about their sex life, get a decent idea of what they want from a partner. Needless to say I don't. 

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CrochetFool

SO I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I went through a phase in college where I read a lot of fluffy (and sometimes kinda smutty) fanfiction. I could never figure out WHY since you won't catch me watching that stuff. I like my movies to have explosions, thanksmuch.

 

I literally JUST realized tonight that I was reading it to try and figure out why people felt/acted that way. I realized somewhere in the middle of washing dishes that I seriously can't imagine feeling that even with Dabishop.

 

Asexuality confirmed!

 

So, TL;DR: when you waste a bunch of time reading stories you don't even like to try to figure out what makes people want sex. Fail utterly. #AsexualProblems

 

 

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12 hours ago, CrochetFool said:

So, TL;DR: when you waste a bunch of time reading stories you don't even like to try to figure out what makes people want sex. Fail utterly. #AsexualProblems

I went through this phase too.

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13 hours ago, CrochetFool said:

 

 

So, TL;DR: when you waste a bunch of time reading stories you don't even like to try to figure out what makes people want sex. Fail utterly. #AsexualProblems

 

 

I used to watch certain movies for the same reason. :mellow:

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ElectricLady25

When you have an asexual boyfriend and no one believes that you just sit around watching movies and playing games.

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chubby turtle
On 3/11/2017 at 8:49 PM, ElectricLady25 said:

When you have an asexual boyfriend and no one believes that you just sit around watching movies and playing games.

I wish I could find an asexual girlfriend, (and, yes, we would just sit around watching movies and playing games) but there's just the fact that they consist of, like, half of one percent of the polpulation and there's really no way to tell where or who they are.  Sad face. :(

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chubby turtle

Heterosexuals: Dating is so hard!  Everyone is so annoying!  I hate everything!  Ugh!

Lesbians: Dating?  Don't get me started on dating!  My potential dating pool is less than one fifth of the population!!!

Gays: It least straight girls or nice when you guys hit on them.  Last time I hit on a straight guy . . . Let's not talk about it.

Lesbians: Oh, I'm sorry.  Let's just say that dating is hard for both of us.

Gays: Yeah.  So, so, so hard.

 

Asexuals: *stares murderously at the rest of the room.  No one quite knows why.*

 

#Asexualproblems 

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Not sure if this counts because I'm ace, but

 

When your animation colleague asks if you could model a "sexy dance" for referencing, and "sexy" is completely alien to you: you have absolutely no idea what qualifies as "sexy" dance moves and you're not even really sure exactly what "sexy" is.

 

#whatisthis"sexy"thatyouspeakof???

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Member106624
On 3/10/2017 at 2:17 PM, Eggroll said:

I think I understand sexual innuendos in general, but I went out on a date late last year and only realized that it was probably a date the next day, and came to the conclusion that it was definitely a date months later lol

has anyone else been in this kind of situation?

.

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When a friend suddenly wants nothing to do with you the second you turn down their advances, because it's all or nothing, apparently.

#asexualproblems

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Hermit Advocate

When your aunt is trying to hook you up with anyone (in a heterosexual relationship) because she "doesn't want you to be lonely" and "wants you to experience the same joy she feels by being in a relationship." Meanwhile, I'm in the corner hiding from the sheer extrovertness being blasted my way while my mom kindly explains to her that I don't need to be in a relationship if I don't want to be. Thanks mom. 

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Knowing all of your friends are sexual, and feeling uncomfortable when they start talking about their sex life. I do well to hide my discomfort, but inside, all I want to do is run away and hide in a corner. 

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Watching anime and wishing that there was a character that didn't give a s*** about peeping during the hot springs/etc. fanservice episodes. That's definitely a crime where the "reward" is not worth the sentence. Just sit down and enjoy your frikkin bath, goddamnit 😤. It'd be hilarious if there was one jaded, genre-savvy character who just completely sold his friends out partly to be a troll and partly to do the right thing (I mean c'mon; peeping is not only lame, but it's also illegal and amounts to sexual harassment). The peeping gag can occasionally be funny but it quickly becomes pretty grating and morally dubious 😐.

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nerdperson777
10 hours ago, Lancer said:

When a friend suddenly wants nothing to do with you the second you turn down their advances, because it's all or nothing, apparently.

#asexualproblems

Yeah, there was a guy I met online playing games.  He asked me out online, and then sometime later I was having identity issues.  When I decided that I was no longer female, he needed half a year to be okay with it.  When he was finally okay with it, we only played occasionally and he no longer played games with me every time I asked.  He said he was okay with it but if he did all he did just for a relationship, then it clearly wasn't.  Also, another friend said he had a crush for 2 whole years and he did not give up easily.  A month ago I realize that he was no longer on my friends list.  I wrote a comment on his profile about it and it confirmed that we weren't friends anymore.  While he felt cheated out of a relationship, I felt cheated out of a friendship.

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Ghost of AVEN

trying so hard not to tell people I'm asexual when they ask who I like. Its not that I want to come out to that douche who keeps asking me the same questions over and over, its more that I want to shut them up. 

How most conversations like this go:

 

"HEY, DWTM, WHO DOES YOUSE LIEK,"

 

"... Noone ..."

"AWWWW COME ON, YOU MUST LIEK SOMEONE,"

 

"Nope,"

 

"REALLY?"

 

"nope"

 

"Silence"

 

"Oh okay, I bet its (name of female friend)"

 

Me=trying not to smack something

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AsexualMemeTrash

When you're trying to load AVEN but there's so much shit open that Chrome stops responding.

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when you tell someone you're sex/romance averse and they go "oh wow I wish I was like that, that would make things so much easier."

like wtf no you jerk it doesn't make anything easier in a culture that prioritizes sex and romance. #asexualproblems 

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mechanicalsunshine
On 10.3.2017 at 6:57 PM, Lancer said:

When people dismiss the possibility that you are asexual because it's somehow easier to believe that you're secretly gay.

#asexualproblems

 

22 hours ago, Dante Mephistopheles said:

I get this, and I'm not proud to admit that half of the time I let people think that I'm secretly gay so they won't ask.  

To be honest, considering I'm from a very small town, when people assume or talk as if I am or might be gay, I get really happy. Like, my aunt once at a festival me, her and my mom went to, started joking about getting me a girlfriend, (not joking as in "haha gay people", it's just how we talk really, hard to explain) because guys would apparently ruin me or something. (didn't really get that part, tbh, but whatever) But, anyways, she was talking about looking for cute girls for me and everything, which is basically her saying "we know you're something other than straight, but since you haven't said anything we're just gonna low key tell you that we're cool with it." And honestly, I was just so happy my family didn't immediately assume I would be offended or somehow oppose to having a girlfriend, I was just sitting there grinning the entire time. 

 

tl;dr I get happy when people assume I'm gay 'cus at least they don't immediately assume I'm straight as a default, and also, most of the time, it shows that they're open to it. 

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nerdperson777
6 hours ago, meh12 said:

when you tell someone you're sex/romance averse and they go "oh wow I wish I was like that, that would make things so much easier."

like wtf no you jerk it doesn't make anything easier in a culture that prioritizes sex and romance. #asexualproblems 

Like two years ago, this one girl from my class invited me to eat dinner with her for my birthday.  She just broke up with her boyfriend and we just happened to pass by where he lived.  The night ended up being her eating her feelings and I was like her therapist.  Although I don't want to be, I'm that stereotypical robot, no feeling aro ace so I told her that I don't experience these feelings she speaks of.  She said that she wanted to be me, just so she wouldn't be feeling the heartbreak that she was feeling at that moment.  Well, if you want my mental illnesses and no capacity to love, in any sense of the word.

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On 3/13/2017 at 10:43 PM, WorldHero said:

Not sure if this counts because I'm ace, but

 

When your animation colleague asks if you could model a "sexy dance" for referencing, and "sexy" is completely alien to you: you have absolutely no idea what qualifies as "sexy" dance moves and you're not even really sure exactly what "sexy" is.

 

#whatisthis"sexy"thatyouspeakof???

Something like that happened to me too.

Once at a fair that I volunteered at with a bunch of people from school. Some guy asked me and the other girl also dressed as a fairy to model for him. He was making a book about fairys. He wanted naked modeling though and apparently asked a ton of girls there. Nobody seemed to say yes.

 

Then a friend who was making a picture of a mermaid for something asked me to take a picture for him to use as a reference, no idea why now that I think of it. I sent him one, but apparently he needed to see more. He was okay with clothes on, but it needed to be in underwear or something. I implied I wasn't super okay and he eventually stopped asking. I think he was engaged at the time too. Unless they broke up or something. 

 

On a different note, apparently I just do not understand the appeal of "sexy" clothing you can't actually wear anywhere. I was watching an art stream and they were drawing someone in one of those virgin killer sweaters that are getting popular. It's basically a big turtleneck, but without sleeves or a back and goes just past the waist so it kind of covers things. I mentioned that they seem neat, but I don't know where you'd actually wear it. The artist mentioned that you don't wear it outside, just inside for your partner. Apparently, my answer that you could wear something under it doesn't count? She then brought up lingerie and how you wear it inside for your partner. And apparently wearing it under actual clothes doesn't count either? Someone else was explaining basically that they're purely for sex, I guess. I just explained that I don't feel those things, but they didn't seem to get why I wouldn't just know that. 

And people do wear those seaters outside! I read about how at a recent anime convention a bunch of people wore them to midnight parties. So I'm not technically wrong.

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mechanicalsunshine
On 16.3.2017 at 5:34 AM, Soraiko said:

On a different note, apparently I just do not understand the appeal of "sexy" clothing you can't actually wear anywhere. I was watching an art stream and they were drawing someone in one of those virgin killer sweaters that are getting popular. It's basically a big turtleneck, but without sleeves or a back and goes just past the waist so it kind of covers things. I mentioned that they seem neat, but I don't know where you'd actually wear it. The artist mentioned that you don't wear it outside, just inside for your partner. Apparently, my answer that you could wear something under it doesn't count? She then brought up lingerie and how you wear it inside for your partner. And apparently wearing it under actual clothes doesn't count either? Someone else was explaining basically that they're purely for sex, I guess. I just explained that I don't feel those things, but they didn't seem to get why I wouldn't just know that. 

And people do wear those seaters outside! I read about how at a recent anime convention a bunch of people wore them to midnight parties. So I'm not technically wrong.

Yeah, something just like this happened to me just a couple of days ago! Me and two of my friends went shopping for certain essentials as we're all going on a year long exchange, and it's really difficult to find clothes and underwear for our sizes in japan. (And we're normal sized. Like my friends are both kinda skinny so they might be fine, but honey, I got difficulty finding bras my size here at home. I've got girth) Now I prefer boxers and comfy bras, shit that ain't too showy, 'cus where's the point ya know, and I do sort of get the idea of having pretty underwear and shit. But when the underwear just looks uncomfortable, you're not even wearing it for yourself... It literally serves no other purpose than "enticing" your lover or some shit, like.... :huh:

on another, but similar note, when I went bra shopping not long before that, I ended up buying this great comfy bra. It's completely black without any of those lacy bits or anything. It's great, I love it. The advertisement for it, tho... I think it was called "Flirt" with subtitles like "Entice, sensual, lust" or some shit like that. They should start advertising shit we'd actually buy, and not just us aces, but most girls out there, like "This bra so comfy you wanna sleep in it. This bra got such good hold, you could run a marathon and you wouldn't get that jerky boob action going even once"... 

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nerdperson777
5 hours ago, mechanicalsunshine said:

Now I prefer boxers and comfy bras, shit that ain't too showy, 'cus where's the point ya know, and I do sort of get the idea of having pretty underwear and shit. But when the underwear just looks uncomfortable, you're not even wearing it for yourself... It literally serves no other purpose than "enticing" your lover or some shit, like.... :huh:

My friend said she and her gf got matching underwear.  I wouldn't tell her this, but I was just thinking about, what if the one you're with isn't the one you want to spend the rest of your life with?  Now you both got the same pair of underwear, meant for a good occasion, and then what do you do with them after the breakup?  Of course, there is the possibility that a couple will stay together.  I was just thinking more pessimistic, and probably very aro.

 

My asexual problem: My order number was 69.  And I had that several times.

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