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Romance and sex in movies....Does it bother you?


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Romance ... Eh. If it's a natural part of the characters' story it's okay. If romance is the only point of the plot, it's pretty boring.

Sex ... boring. My reaction is best summed up by my only thought about scene my friends assured me was incredibly steamy: "why would she have sex with a man in armor?"

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90% of the time I hate sex in movies. It's jut so fucking awkward, and family members always walk in on the movie right when they happen.

As for romance in movies, whether I like it or not depends on how well the movie is made, and how strong the plot is. Generally I don't like romance as a genre in itself, but I don't mind romantic scenes in an already good movie.

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anon_anonymous

when i'm around other it makes me feel awkward i guess... even fairly gratuitous sexualization does now; not that it's for stupid people, but i feel like people are watching me all the time and there's nothing there to enjoy really: butch attractive woman, feminime attractive woman, strong man... it's all a generic.

romance is better, but as dumb.

i would watch something more cerebal on my own, but don't really care for film.

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intothewest

If it's well-written, I like them both. (I.e., the romance/sex scenes aren't just there to glue a crappy plot together.)

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Hello,

i donĀ“t enjoy sex in movies

I tolerate is, because its the makers freedom to show what he thinks needs to be in the movie to convey a message

i avoid this scenes, i get a cup of tea, look away etc, because they make me uncomfortable its embarassing..

My opinion is: sex is a privat and intimate thing, so how can people / actors in these cases, do this publically? in movies, so that millions of others can watch it... i think these people are not "normal", its maybe us who are normal....

oh, sorry, i forgot, ...... what is normal anyway??

so i would go for an open and honest dialog with you husband.... maybe that clears things out??

seeker151

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I'm a super sex-positive asexual. If the writing is good and I care about the characters, I'm like, "Woo, get it!"

Or, on a different note- did anybody see the movie Shame? Michael Fassbender plays a sex addict (brilliantly!), and every single act in that movie- whether mundane or graphic- is brutally honest and effective character building. That I can definitely watch.

Though in both cases my attention is usually on the set design, motive, symbolism, or something equally unerotic. :P

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Depends on the movie really. Thought most of the time I don't care for sex scenes in movies. I don't mind so much if it's implied, at least if it's written/acted well.

Romance, though, I do enjoy (again if it's written/acted well). I don't typically like romance movies (like The Notebook), but I do love 80s and 90s teen movies: She's All That, Say Anything, Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. I also love Pride and Prejudice (the book and the movie) and Amelie. And I enjoy plenty of movies and tv shows where the main plot isn't romance but there is some romance between characters: SyFy's Alice miniseries, Howl's Moving Castle, Primeval, Being Human... Actually, I think it's more fun when a movie/show isn't entirely filled with romance, it makes it seem more realistic and it's more interesting when it's a 'will they ever get together?' kind of scenario.

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I like romantic movies when the plot is good, but as for sex scenes... It's weird but they feel like invasion of privacy to me. I mean, I know it's only actors playing out a scene but there's still a story behind it and I feel as if I'm being rude to those fictional characters or something. No idea if this makes any sense... It's kinda funny when I think about it but that's how I feel.

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When I see those kind of movies, sometimes I even don't look at it. I just don't like it. I mean, it feels weird to look at me. When there is a sexscene I just don't look. Really I hate it to look.

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Yes, but only because it's more prevalant in fictional content than a hot new meme on the Internet. In and of itself romance can be cute, as in the wedding of two high school sweethearts I know, but I don't have to look at or hear about them every or every other time I talk to another human being so it's not comparable to my experience with romance and sex.


Using estimates here, but...


Imagine a genre or theme you don't care about at all.


Now imagine 10 favorite movies and shows that are not listed as that genre or theme. It's in 6-7 of them for absolutely no reason except that other people like to see it, and it occasionally damages or ruins the movie or show.


Imagine 10 favorite books that are not listed as that genre or theme. It's in 4-5 of them, either just because or as an added layer of "depth."


Imagine that you like amateur fiction and fanfiction. It's in 8-9 of them. You typically cannot exclude them from searching and browsing, especially the ones that are only listed as "drama" or "fantasy."


Imagine that you used to like to roleplay online, and imagine 10 genres or themes you'd love. It's almost certainly in all 10 of them.


I want it out of my damn face, is all.

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Worst Username Ever

Romance and sex in stories itself doesn't bother me. What annoys me, though, is that almost every movie feel the need to push in some long kiss or something even when it's not neccessary or relevant to the plot, it often feels tacked-on and unneccessary.


Imagine that you used to like to roleplay online, and imagine 10 genres or themes you'd love. It's almost certainly in all 10 of them.

Yes... oh god, yes! I have a certain interest in roleplaying, but a huge majority of RPers seem to be in it for the smut or romance (not saying that's ALL they want, but for many it seems to be a "part" of the roleplaying and they're not really interested in partners who won't RP that). (And those few that are not are in genres I'm not interested in... I'm more of a "modern-day, slice of life" RPer, but most of those seem to include romance/smut) I have no interest in them, I just want to RP friendships between characters.

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Sex in movies sort of bothers me, but it also sort of doesn't? I don't know, maybe I should just give an example. Like in Game of Thrones (shh tv show, close enough), as others have mentioned, there is a LOT of gratuitous and completely unnecessary sex. It makes me very mildly uncomfortable, but I pretty much just watch the scene with an air of disinterest. I don't need to skip it or avert my gaze, though on the particularly long scenes I'll be like, "Okay, when is this going to end?" My main problem with sex in movies is that it'll usually feel rushed?

And as far as romance goes, I don't really go for romance in general. I'll watch the occasional romcom, but usually on a spontaneous movie-outing with friends--though I'm actually interested in some. On the other hand, I enthusiastically anticipate the release of mainly action/adventure type movies (where I'll either like the Obligatory Romantic Subplot or feel it is distracting from the focus of the film).

Yes... oh god, yes! I have a certain interest in roleplaying, but a huge majority of RPers seem to be in it for the smut or romance (not saying that's ALL they want, but for many it seems to be a "part" of the roleplaying and they're not really interested in partners who won't RP that). (And those few that are not are in genres I'm not interested in... I'm more of a "modern-day, slice of life" RPer, but most of those seem to include romance/smut) I have no interest in them, I just want to RP friendships between characters.

As a former roleplayer (who still has some interest but too much self-consciousness/lack of self-confidence to actually do it) I wholeheartedly agree! I'd love to roleplay exploring the platonic relationship between characters.

Also, on a somewhat related note, I read fanfiction [sidenote: Interestingly, I'm all for romance in fanfiction. The majority of fanfics I read are romance-centered. BUT I need a non-romantic-centered source material to get into the fandom and get attached to the characters in general. I'm not super-interested in romance in the actual source material books I read or shows I watch.], and many fanfictions are, well, smut or PWP (porn without plot). Which I am wholly uninterested in. Unfortunately, many fanfics will also feature gratuitous/unnecessary sex. Sometimes I'll read, sometimes I'll skim/skip past it, but in general I find the excess to be really annoying. Especially when a fic has been really nice and perfect and then suddenly WHAM obligatory sex scene! And it feels jarring and out of place and sometimes out of character, because I don't think they'd rush into sex that quickly (and then I'm like, "What do I know I've never been sexually attracted to anyone," so I try to give them the benefit of the doubt, but still)! I'd like to end by saying that the number of people who flat-out refuse to read a fic unless it contains an explicit sex scene disheartens me.

Aaand that derailed a bit from the original topic of the board. Sorry! :'D

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I actually really like romance plots in books and movies. I don't mind sex scenes in books or movies if the characters are in love. I love Game of Thrones but could do without some of the brothel scenes - I don't look away or anything but it feels like a waste of screen time to me.

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Yes... oh god, yes! I have a certain interest in roleplaying, but a huge majority of RPers seem to be in it for the smut or romance (not saying that's ALL they want, but for many it seems to be a "part" of the roleplaying and they're not really interested in partners who won't RP that). (And those few that are not are in genres I'm not interested in... I'm more of a "modern-day, slice of life" RPer, but most of those seem to include romance/smut) I have no interest in them, I just want to RP friendships between characters.

It's actually the reason I turned to writing instead. I'd rather work alone on constructing something bigger and more difficult than attempt to weed through that mess for anything I want. I left several years ago, but I'm not surprised to hear nothing's really changed.

I guess I should thank the nearly obsessive devotion to pairings, because I consider strong platonic emotional themes and attempted imitation of the feel of various shows and games with little to no sexual or romantic content to be my hallmark. I might not have discovered "my thing" both as a writer of fanfiction and fiction if it weren't for all that, let alone all its little nooks and crannies.

I will say, though, that my signature comes from an author who's written romance that I enjoyed. I consider her work a role model for anything I may write in the future that includes it, as the one I enjoyed was a period fantasy that also talked extensively about gender in that society and what it means to be human. I will read or watch the genre if it offers me more than just two (or more) people who have a thing for each other.

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It only bothers me in movies where it isn't needed. Like the second Matrix. What was that all about? Everyone was dancing in the club and they were flashing back and forth to Neo and whats her name doing it. POINTLESS. Added absolutely nothing to the movie. My friend said, "Yes it did, it showed how much in love they were." I was like, we knew how much in love they were by their longing looks at each other, by her continually asking if he was the "one" and them indicating that she was looking for the "one". Seriously, did we need to see that?

Almost any action movie that incorporates sex, I'm pretty much irritated by it. However, if I choose to watch a romantic drama, I tend to expect that there will be some sort of sexual content. I'm prepared for it and it generally fits in with the plot.

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He talks down to me, when I am watching anything other than a documentary or news at home and says these movies are for less intellectual folks.

I'm a little annoyed by that one, everyone has the right to his own opinion but I strongly disagree because it depends on what kind of movie you are watching. There are many intellectual movies out there, they're only not always from Hollywood =p

But than again I have a great love for movies and it was a part of my studies.

I don't mind romance in movies, I mean in most movies it's the main storyline. Only sometimes they're badly written and a bit cliche. As for sex scene's I don't mind them when they have a purpose to the story, not that I'm very always comfortable watching them but if they add purpose to the story I can endure. I have no problem with the hinting to the start of sex and tastefully shot. I'm more uncomfortable with the almost porn scene's. The ones I really hate are the sex scene that are added because it's sex and that sells! But have really nothing to do with the storyline. I really hate those.

And sometimes I watch it with astonishment thinking how can that ever be pleasurable and poor actors having to play that one out.

I hope I make some sense because I'm typing this while being half asleep.

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I generally avoid movies and television shows that involve romantic tones. It is frustrating to see folks having "normal" relationships in which I am incapable. It's been several years since I had a romance, and after losing my prostate in my twenties, I found it extraordinarily hard to find anyone who would even consider a relationship with me. I am new to forums like this, and I hope to learn better ways to cope with my condition.

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TheNaughtyNeutrois

Sex in movies and tv shows irk me. However, if it's implied and for the sake of moving the plot or adding character development, sure I can handle that.

I watch the anime, Junjou Romantica and it has a lot of gay sex. They don't actually *show* the details of it like full-blown hentai would, they just imply it off-screen, which is one of the reasons why I'm still able to keep watching it. They use sex to further the plot, to further the character development after, because the characters either angst over it or the relationship becomes more profound and deeper.

My parents don't believe me when I say I watch that series for the character development. They joke I just watch it for the sex. I really don't. It's like any other movies or tv series, if sex is a plot device to strengthen romance or character, I really don't mind. But if its senseless and just chucked in there for no logical reason, well, yeah, I'm gonna switch and watch something else.

I find myself more fascinated with drama and the psychological reactions or emotional developments in characters and their relationships, moreso than the sexual nature of their relationships.

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i love romantic movies but hate sex scenes, they make me very uncomfortable especially if there is someone else in the room. if theres a movie that i think/know will have a sex scene, i will decline watching it, or insist on fast-forwarding or leaving the room. i think some of us are just very prudish, i'm not even sure it's got anything to do with asexuality.

i don't know whether his talking down would be linked to the intimacy thing or not, is he generally the critical type? if not, then maybe it is a sign of insecurity about intillectual-ness? i can be quite critical of the shows/movies that other people like, but i think that's about my own insecurities- like feeling i'm not smart enough so i must only like documentaries to be/seem smarter or something.

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I don't worry about any of it, really. In some cases, it gives another dimension to the story that balances it a bit.

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I'm not really bothered by romance in movies. I can't remember the last time I watched a romantic comedy or something like that, but that is just because I don't like the genre. Sex scenes make me uncomfortable when others are around, but I'm pretty sure everyone has that.

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I'm okay if it's "light" romance with a peck on the lips or something similar, but if it gets overly sexual I just want to skip the scene because they have no reason to be in the movie. I just prefer my movies to have a bit more than sex scenes and that's something that's hard to come across now-a-days. It's a bit different if it's a gay love scene because that is something I can identify with more than heterosexual or lesbian sex scenes or romance, but that's entirely because of my gender identity and having been treated as female my entire life (and being expected to have sex as a female, which bugged me even more because I don't want sex anyway).

Anyway, I just generally tolerate it and avoid actively going out to find movies with romance. I don't really care if other people watch them (my mom likes them), I just prefer to watch something else.

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hedonistichealth

Sex in movies only bothers me in the sense that typically, these acts are portrayed as essential to a romantic life, and so for much of my life I was really stuck on thinking that sex was necessary for me to get close to people in a certain way and love people in a certain way.

The sex itself doesn't really bother me though, although it kind of depends on my mood. Sometimes I'm a little repulsed and want to look away, mostly I'm indifferent.

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98slbrookes98

I do love romantic films because I can relate to the romance. Whenever I see hetro-romantic scenes I relate to the guy in the scene because I'm homoromantic. Sex scenes don't really bother me - usually they are shown as part of a loving relationship between sexuals and I understand that. Even one night stands in soaps I sort of vaguely get because I can understand feeling angry, frustrated etc and wanting a distraction even though I can't relate to wanting to have sex. Actually nothing much is shown - usually only a shirtless man or something like that. I accept most of the world is sexual and I can try and adjust to that even if I don't want it myself.

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