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Do you feel like sex is foreign to you?


& I'm a heretic

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Phantasmal Fingers

Sex is entirely foreign to me. But each to his/her own. Without wishing to appear smug I'm very glad I don't have to deal with any of this.

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alpacaterpillar

I think this was mentioned on another thread, but primarily I find that sex seems like such a... not obvious thing to do. Not instinctive. It would honestly have never occurred to me if it weren't for Health classes.

And I cannot think there is any reasoning present behind oral sex... What the hell. Seriously. If I had a girlfriend who wanted me to stick my penis in her mouth, I'd absolutely refuse.

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I notice a lot of repulsion from sex. I don't really have that, I just don't particularly care. I also masturbate, probably a lot, but not to sex or vanilla porn. Porn just doesn't interest me. They may as well be baking a cake or doing housework or (dare I say) spitting into cups. I'm of a more or less scientific mind, so it doesn't disgust me. It's just another thing people do that I don't have much interest in doing. I do feel slightly awkward when I watch porn, but I think that's more because people would generally assume that I was watching it to masturbate to. It's more awkward because of what people would falsely think of me than what it is itself.

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fitterhappier

I've never had sex and certainly don't intend to. Back before I identified as asexual I would often visualize scenarios, romantic and more than romantic, and how I would behave in each one, as a sort of mental practice for the real thing if it ever happened. Well, I could never wrap my brain around the idea of intercourse, the mechanics of it, and how people manage to incorporate sex into their daily lives. My scenarios always went black when it came time for the shedding of clothes, or I would start thinking about it as if we were characters in a movie, like that's not me. I would never be in that situation, I don't WANT to be in that situation. It's a total mystery.

Fluids, strange noises, nudity, bodies behaving in ways that are out of our conscious control... sounds like the worst thing I could possibly imagine.

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artemisofephesus

I'm with most people here in that sex is kind of foreign to me, something other people do. It's hard to explain, but I'm actually really interested in the idea of sex, and the mechanics of it, etc. I don't have a problem talking about it from a theoretical perspective or thinking about it.

It's when I get to the point of actually desiring sex with another person that everything just... stops working. It's like there's a mental block, like my brain just won't comprehend. How do you explain the absence of something? I mean, there'd be another person, and awkwardness, and bodies in the way, and not knowing what you're doing, and other stuff. And there's just nothing that I can tell myself or feel that says 'have sex with person.' So in that sense, it is absolutely alien.

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Yes, I definitely find sex completely foreign to me. The whole act just seems uncomfortable and odd. When I would get aroused by something (quite rarely..) the thought of actually having intercourse turns me off pretty quickly. The act itself doesn't seem appealing at all. Oral sex is even less appealing. With sex, I can at least have an understanding of it's purpose - sex evolved for reproductive purposes, and it's pleasureable to encourage the species to have sex to reproduce. At least intercourse makes sense, and I can understand why it's done. But any explanation as to why oral sex is done leaves me clueless. Someone told me that giving a guy oral sex is all about enjoying giving him pleasure, which is obvious. But I still don't understand why one would want to do it. I wouldn't want a guy treating my mouth like that, and I'd feel suspicious of any guy who got aroused by treating me like that. Which means I'm suspicious of almost every guy on the planet. :mellow:

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Do any of you feel strong revulsion when you think about yourself having sex? Is it a very common feeling? Does it terrify you like it does me?

I sometimes/often feel a pang of something that I can really only describe as a sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach, combined with a certain sense of sadness and/or loss...

For what it's worth, I've had sex.

I experience the same sickening feeling in my stomach and a sense of sadness, one that I've never been able to put just one word to but it's really horrible, only I get that feeling any time I encounter even the idea of sex (since I don't participate in that activity, myself). People joke about it, or it's in music or movies, or anywhere I hear of it, it just gets me down completely. Especially in conversations when people are putting me and sex in the same sentences, just asking questions or stating possibilities or whatever. I don't think I could do ever do it, to me me it just ain't right. It literally makes me sick and depressed.

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Yes it does...

So foreign that for a long time I couldn't understand that everyone else wasn't like me. I thought they were faking their interest in it, but couldn't understand why.

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I don't know if foreign is the word I would use, maybe it is...
I've always been rather indifferent to sex and anything that has to do with it; live and let live. T

here are days when I'm disgusted by it but most of the time it doesn't bother me, I can read erotic novels or fanfiction but the erotic scenes don't do anything for me...


But I cannot bring myself to understand what other people think is so special about sex. I know a lot about sex and the human body, I've never had it and never want to have it but I've studied it, from a clinical perspective. (Actually, a pile of bricks is way more interesting; I can work with that.)


Kissing is something I totally don't get and is disgusted by. I don't see how the joining of oral orifices for food transport and speech is a romantic gesture!

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& I'm a heretic

Yes it does...

So foreign that for a long time I couldn't understand that everyone else wasn't like me. I thought they were faking their interest in it, but couldn't understand why.

I agree, it wasn't until recently that I realized how much sexual people actually cared for sex. It never been like a thing for me and I just didn't realize it was to other people. But I guess we're wired differently...
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The idea of it isn't really foreign to me, it used to be though.

However, the idea of me and sex is just weird and it freaks me out at times.

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