Jump to content

Do asexuals dream about having sex?


undefined in life

Recommended Posts

undefined in life

I've just recently discovered asexuality, and so far its answered a few questions about myself.

However, although I don't seem to have an interest in sex while I'm conscious, I have had one or more enjoyable sex dreams.

So I was wondering if any asexuals on here have had this experience?

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've just recently discovered asexuality, and so far its answered a few questions about myself.

However, although I don't seem to have an interest in sex while I'm conscious, I have had one or more enjoyable sex dreams.

So I was wondering if any asexuals on here have had this experience?

Weirdly, yes. I haven't had any that are about actual intercourse, really, but I have had the odd dream that is definitely sexual in nature. But then, I'm grey-A and have very occasionally felt some level of attraction. I don't know whether people who have never in their life felt any attraction whatsoever have a different experience.

I know it confused the heck out of me for a bit that in dreams I can thoroughly enjoy things that in real life make me go 'ugh, hell no' and flee. But then, I experience lots of things differently in dreams to how I experience them in real life, so why not this?

(For example, in real life I'm touch-aversive and have sensory issues, but in dreams that's not the case at all.)

Link to post
Share on other sites
Ace McHeeb

I know I've not had a wet dream in ... GOSH! I don't remember how long. I have and do feel attraction all the time, regardless of gender. I never wanna have sex with the objects of my attraction, I just want to be close to them, cuddle them, kiss them. But no wet dreams in the longest time.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe like, 3-4 of them, a long time ago. But very vague and not what I'd call 'enjoyable'.

Link to post
Share on other sites
herpaderderderderder

Yeah, I've had sex dreams. They weren't so bad. I'm not sure I'd say they were enjoyable, really... but eh... they're just dreams.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I have had two, perhaps three dreams about sex that I remembered when I awoke. They were all years ago though, which I suspect was my brain not telling me something.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Nope, never had an even vaguely sexual dream in my life. Maybe I'm just an oddball.

Link to post
Share on other sites
MinusCelsius

Never had any dreams about sex or romance. Heck, I rarely even dream about people in general.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've had dreams of this kind, but it wasn't enjoyable for me in the slightest =_=

They probably aren't even an accurate representation of how the process would actually work in Real Life™, either...

Link to post
Share on other sites

I have in the past, but I wouldn't say the other person has ever been the focus point though, it's more been about the 'activity' at the time. I think it was my libido/ sexually deprived area of my brain that was telling me I need to get laid lol.

Link to post
Share on other sites
The Great WTF

I've had... two? Yeah. I think two dreams about sex. Both were with my current partner and one was induced by weed.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I have, but not for a while though .... maybe 3 years since the last one. They were quite enjoyable by what I can remember

Link to post
Share on other sites
Sockstealingnome

I've had 3 wet dreams but no intercourse happened. Haven't had one in 3 years. The first one had me so uncomfortable I was running away from the other person. The second one was surreal and I only felt calm, not aroused at all. The third one I was disgusted but willing to put up with making out with the guy because I wanted to get laid.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes, two or three that I can think of offhand, not including rape/assault dreams (of which there have been significantly more, but I don't think they really count as sex dreams). In one of them, I was a man having sex with another man; I was "top," if that's the term for it. (And the other man was David Hyde Pierce ;) .) That one was definitely bizarre, in a hilarious sort of way. I'd say the dream sex was more enjoyable than real life sex, but still not satisfying or something I would wish to experience again. All in all I'm pretty apathetic about those dreams.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Sockstealingnome

Yes, two or three that I can think of offhand, not including rape/assault dreams (of which there have been significantly more, but I don't think they really count as sex dreams). In one of them, I was a man having sex with another man; I was "top," if that's the term for it. (And the other man was David Hyde Pierce ;) .) That one was definitely bizarre, in a hilarious sort of way. I'd say the dream sex was more enjoyable than real life sex, but still not satisfying or something I would wish to experience again. All in all I'm pretty apathetic about those dreams.

Are the rape dreams enjoyable or scary? I hear a lot of straight women have rape fantasies that they enjoy.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Mostly Peaceful Ryan

I've had a number of sex dreams, I consider them more nightmares than anything else. I don't ever know the person that I'm dreaming about it's someone my mind made up. I wake up from these and feel very uncomfortable afterwards, I don't like them at all. :( I have had good dreams though that involved people I had crush on. These usually are more like snuggle dreams. I prefer these and always wake up very happy after these. :) I have been practicing controlling my dreams to get rid of these sex dreams. It's very hard though -_-

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've had wet dreams. I'd briefly wake up to contractions "down there" and then fall right back asleep. I do remember having dreams of people having intercourse, but it was never my being in their place.

If I do have dreams with crushes (which is usually a BIG BIG sign of very deep feelings), it's never about sex. In fact, I don't usually interact with them at all... but I remember their presence.

EDIT: Forgot to mention that the wet dreams were common in high school. Since then I don't remember the last time I woke up to contractions.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Janus the Fox

I've perhaps had a total of half a dozen heterosexual dreams during my teens, very rarely now though, conscious fantasy is somewhat... Homosexual... :ph34r:   

Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah, though not really frequently. But also not too infrequently. It's mostly annoying because I don't want sex in real life and quite often it's a very tactile-esque realistic dream, so much so that I can wake up aroused. Bleh. Just as often I will dream about masturbation, which is something I don't do, and I actually find that more annoying.

What's really cool though, is that since discovering asexuality, my dreams have reflected that self-understanding. In my dreams, I am far more likely to bring up my aceness to my dream partner, or just be dreamily physical without sex or dreamily enjoy the sensations while knowing that it's ok to enjoy even though I'm ace.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I rarely remember my dreams but occasionally I will remember have a dream about sex. They don't happen more than maybe once a year though. They are kind of weird but I don't dislike them.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Gray-A here.

I´ve had several nice sex dreams. But I think they were far away from real sex. I´ve never had sex so I doubt I could have realistic dreams about it. :lol:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Nope, not a single one. I just have really, really weird dreams.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've had a few in my lifetime, one of which involved a tentacle monster :lol:

Nothing about them was that bad or good, some were pleasant and others were downright creepy or even painful. I think I usually wake up feeling a mild sense of unease - mainly because even the fairly pleasant ones often have some vaguely creepy element to them that make me wonder exactly what my subconscious is trying to say to me.

I don't think there's anything wrong with it, though. The tentacle monster one is still probably one of my favourite dreams to recall just because of how absurd it was.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I just came to this thread because I took an afternoon nap today and had dreams full of sex. 0_0

I normally have sex dreams sometimes, and some are really bizarre and sci-fi-ish. This one wasn't. It was basically a dream that I was NOT asexual, and it involved a guy I know. In the dream, we were living together in a former school building that I had bought in the dream, and there was a lot of sex in it. It was kind of weird, but vaguely enjoyable during the dream. A bit awkward when I woke up and realized I just had a dream about that guy though, lol.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I have had sex dreams, but I never really enjoyed them. I honestly wish I wouldn't have them because I feel un-asexual afterwards like I'm a fake asexual. I suppose I have never really had sex in them, but done sexual things. But then again one of them also included a male and I am homoromantic so I would say they are really meaningless. It think it is the same way a heterosexual person may have a sexual dream involving a same sex person. It's not who they are or who they are attracted to; it's just a dream and something (most people) have no control over. It doesn't reflect how one feels in real life and I don't think you should let that stress you.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've had numerous sex dreams, one of which was a recurring dream (it was a year ago). I've also sex dreams in which I was not involved, others in which I was. In the latter case, I'd change the dream to something less sexual.

Link to post
Share on other sites
darkbluent

I haven't so far... it's been kinda dissapointing. Might help to note that i don't remember my dreams much, if i dream at all though.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...