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How many of you are married/have children?


Pax F

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  • 1 month later...
NotUrAverageBlonde

Im 25 with a 2 year old... One of the few times i actually had sex i ended up getting pregnant... Shes a blessing though wouldnt do anything differently...

Im 25 with a 2 year old... One of the few times i actually had sex i ended up getting pregnant... Shes a blessing though wouldnt do anything differently...

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I've never been married and don't plan on it ever but I do have two daughters that rock and I get along with their mum too so things are pretty good.

I've only been in two relationships (I'm 40 atm) and tbh I prefer being single mainly because there's no pressure to preform the deed

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Married for 25 yrs, 2 kids, divorced 4 yrs. Actually, marriage is a pretty good fit for a demi, I miss romance. No regrets, my kids are great.

The dating scene (either same or opposite sex) isn't so good for me as a demi since there's a lot of pressure to be cismale and/or sexual early on.

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Married for two years, no kids, one dog. There will probably be kids one day... and lots more dogs.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Married for seven months, DH decided he preferred his first wife, chucked me out.

Got pg to a chap I was seeing and with whom I was about to break up, so we stayed together, marrying because his father thought it was a good idea when DS was 14 months old. Together for 14 years, now "separated under one roof" as the Australian govt likes to put it. Going through a divorce while you're in the same house is haaaaaaaarrrrrrrd.

My now 13 year old son is my life.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Married for 12 years, one 5 y/o daughter. Trying to figure out what we are, we just tell folks "separated" and we are staying under the same roof for the time being.

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I am 33, married 13 years, with 3 children. :) (A lot of 3's in there!) Life is good...there have been ups and downs. A lot of downs when it comes to sex of course. I've emotionally checked out from time to time because I just feel like he doesn't get it, and he's not a romantic (which is something I really like). I love him, and am hoping things can change for us eventually...but I'm devoted. I have three wonderful children...all daughters.

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Add me to the three-bie list. Three children, not-married, but was engaged a while back, to a man not the father. He passed away though.

So 27, single and mother of 3. Twins girls aged 10, and a son who is almost 9.

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I'm not interested in dating with men or women. But I think an asexual marriage is wonderful if you find someone who has the same opinion with you.

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Maybe it's just me but I don't see asexuality, marriage, and children being a formula for a successful relationship. I personally find it selfish to ask someone with a different sexuality to commit to me, if you think it's hard for you imagine how it is for that person as well...one way or another it will more than likely lead to some bitterness from one side or the other or even both.

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Thoroughly not fond of the very concept of marriage; so, no.

(However, I've been joking with my partner sometimes that if we both were very different - i.e., more "conventional" - in outlook/philosophy, we'd be prime candidates for ending up married. We've had a bit of an "old couple on the sofa" vibe with each other right from the start. :D)

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I'm 27, married, won't be having children. Both my husband and I have known our whole lives that we don't want to have kids. No real specific reason, we're just not interested. :)

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  • 3 weeks later...

Married. 1child aged13. Didn't know I was Ace when I married. I just thought I was a really good virgin. Been through a lot of people trying to "fix me". Have now identified as Ace, which makes sense of my whole life. Found a compromise with my husband, who is sexual. But still a long way to go, as I still feel like a repressed asexual, and not sure how to remedy that as I have no desire to end my marriage.

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Add me to the three-bie list. Three children, not-married, but was engaged a while back, to a man not the father. He passed away though.

So 27, single and mother of 3. Twins girls aged 10, and a son who is almost 9.

It feels weird reading that a person about my age already has children aged 10 when I haven't ever even considered having children, let alone a relationship.

Hmm, when you were busy producing children I was busy studying and working. Different life paths for the win :)

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Add me to the three-bie list. Three children, not-married, but was engaged a while back, to a man not the father. He passed away though.

So 27, single and mother of 3. Twins girls aged 10, and a son who is almost 9.

It feels weird reading that a person about my age already has children aged 10 when I haven't ever even considered having children, let alone a relationship.

Hmm, when you were busy producing children I was busy studying and working. Different life paths for the win :)

Yeah, agreed... though I haven't been busy having children or studying and working, but have spent the majority of the past decade (and longer, really) mostly isolating myself and struggling/dealing with mental and physical illness. At 27, I don't function much differently than I did at 17, and I can't fathom either having a family or working at a job. I'm still essentially a teenager, despite my chronological age...

(Not sure I'd recommend my particular "life path" to anyone, though...)

No working either? Where I live money doesn't grow in trees, unfortunately, so I have to sell my hide for some cash to pay for a variety of costs.

EDIT

On a serious note, I am living somewhat large for the moment which necessitates doing long hours. In my opinion every life path taken has great potential to teach us many valuable things. We are doing things which we need to learn, I think. I know I have a humble personality and spending money on myself is something I've had to teach myself, as selfishness doesn't come naturally to me.

According to this outlook, perhaps you have something to learn from your path as well that you can teach others?

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Sanguine&Melancholic

1 child, now I'm sterilized. I was 95% sure I didn't want a kid and 100% sure that I needed one before age 35 if I was to have one. I still share the house, separate bedrooms, with his father. I'm usually ok with it because it's easier to share child care at home time.

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It feels weird reading that a person about my age already has children aged 10 when I haven't ever even considered having children, let alone a relationship.

Hmm, when you were busy producing children I was busy studying and working. Different life paths for the win :)

Yeah, agreed... though I haven't been busy having children or studying and working, but have spent the majority of the past decade (and longer, really) mostly isolating myself and struggling/dealing with mental and physical illness. At 27, I don't function much differently than I did at 17, and I can't fathom either having a family or working at a job. I'm still essentially a teenager, despite my chronological age...

Oh dear, that sounds familiar... 20th grad anniversary coming up for me next year, with some of my classmates being parents of teenage kids by now. Completely different world for me, I wonder who's gonna consider whom the bigger weirdo... :blink:

Anyways, I feel like an odd mix between teenager and grumpy old geezer... I'm kinda like a sim that skipped the Adult stage by some buggy glitch in the game. :lol:

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Married, for sixteenmumblesomethingish years, and still very happy with my spouse. Fortunately, we're both naturally good at being polyamorous--neither of us has jealousy or relationship insecurity issues--so he's been able to make connections to relieve his sexual needs without me. No kids; neither of us ever wanted any, and I've been sterilized for over a decade.

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Was married, somehow, for 12 years, two kids. Some time after the divorce I discovered the term asexuality and figured out the main reason why my marriage failed. Had I known about it at the time things might have been different.

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Divorced (twice), one kid. Had no clue Asexuality was an option until a few years ago. But I love my girl more than anything else in the world.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Married. Kind of in a weird place right now. I love my husband intellectually and emotionally, but I never. want. sex. Not with him, not with anyone. We have one son. Since I'm new at this, I'm trying to figure out how to deal with it and how it should affect my marriage (or if it even should at all). My husband comes from an extremely strict religion where the women are always subservient to the men. He's not like that most of the time, but in the bedroom is the one place where he feels "cheated" if stuff doesn't happen. So, long story short, I am intimate with him because I love him and want him to feel good and be happy, not because I want or need it.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Married. Kind of in a weird place right now. I love my husband intellectually and emotionally, but I never. want. sex.

Yeah, likewise. I'm 27, married three years; we're compromising. I... want kids? He really wants them, but I've never really felt the desire. I can intellectualize why I might want them, but I'm freaked out by the thought of pregnancy. I've never gotten along with young kids (they've always hated/been scared of me). I'm told that once I have my own, all of that will change.

But I'm deeply terrified that this going to be like the other thing people told me: once you find the right one, you'll like sex!

Right.

So, what if I have a kid and realize I have no maternal instinct whatsoever and thus make a terrible mother?

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

I am 45 and have been with my husband since 1993. We have one seven year old. I was barely sexual when we met and am now pretty thoroughly asexual. I have no desire for sex with him or anyone. That's inconvenient, because he is highly sexual. I haven't exactly said "asexual" to him, but in the last several years he has become quite clear on my lack of interest.

TMI warning:

To accomodate our differences, I give him a lot of blow jobs. I don't get any sexual enjoyment out of it, but I take pride in my work and I enjoy doing something nice for my very best friend in the whole wide world. It works for him because he gets off and we have sexual intimacy, which to him is part of love. He doesn't feel a need to get sex elsewhere. It works for me because I don't have to be aroused or pretend to be aroused.

Aside from sex, we are physically affectionate. We kiss, snuggle, hold hands, and all that normal stuff. In fact, we do that a lot more now that I don't worry that he will expect that to lead to sex.

I consider myself quite lucky.

I used to worry that I needed fixing. Then about five years ago I got really pissed that I had bought into the idea that there was something wrong with me. Now it is just so obvious that sexual feeling is giant continuum that I am perfectly content and self-accepting. There is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I have a great relationship, a happy family, a job that makes me happy, lots of friends and hobbies. I don't need anybody rubbing my genitals to complete my life.

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  • 2 weeks later...

age 56, asexual, married to heterosex/sexual 35 yrs, 1 daughter. When i was young .... all my g/f's got married after graduating from high sch - not me, i had no such plans of getting married (had 6 marriage proposals, married the 7th).

Wanted to have kids (biological clock?), but wasnt sure i wanted that long of a commitment or could handle it. Discussed it w/husb who was on same page. GLAD i only had one kid, but in a way, it was educational for me - when she became a teenager, watching first hand the sex drive. From age 11 she was focused on finding a mate, a real need, drive. interesting.

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Married 28 years with 2 girls. Hubby and I have always struggles with the intimate part of our lives together are are just coming to terms with why. On the plus side we are the best of friends and enjoy each other's company.

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