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Asexuall do they watch porn ? (TMI Warning)


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#1 Taaka

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 02:17 PM

Hello - Im new here..... married for 12 years. Last 5 years without any sex. Found out last year that my husband watch porn, but do not want any sexual activity with me. He watch porn 2-3 times a week.... It that typicall for a asexuall ?

Thx for any reply

#2 JJButterworth

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 02:46 PM

There are some asexuals that do watch porn. On the other hand, asexulaity is the lack of sexual attraction so just because your marriage became sexless does not mean your husband is asexual. There are many reasons why a marriage becomes sexless. What I suggest you do is talk openly about it, ask him if or was ever he is sexually attracted to you or anyone for that matter. If he is asexual, I assume that he is of the romantic variety and loves you in the way that any romantic partner would love their partner, so keep that in mind.

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#3 Taaka

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 02:54 PM

There are some asexuals that do watch porn. On the other hand, asexulaity is the lack of sexual attraction so just because your marriage became sexless does not mean your husband is asexual. There are many reasons why a marriage becomes sexless. What I suggest you do is talk openly about it, ask him if or was ever he is sexually attracted to you or anyone for that matter. If he is asexual, I assume that he is of the romantic variety and loves you in the way that any romantic partner would love their partner, so keep that in mind.



We have talked about it, and he know i dont like it. He do want's us to be together, but dont what any sexuall contact with me or any body else (according to him)..........

#4 Reptillian

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 03:18 PM

I"m one of them that does it. I just find it um interesting.

Terminologies into my profile
...
Igender : The identity in which one takes the position of the worldview that people generally assumes too much about gender and gender is not coherently defined.

Cis-genderless : The perspective in which one has no gender mentality although does identity with his own sex as if one identifies with it by default.

Igsexual : The identity in which one takes the position of the worldview that sexual attraction is not coherently defined and cannot identity within a sexual identity unless a reference point of what's sexual attraction has been coherently defined.

...


#5 JJButterworth

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 03:22 PM


There are some asexuals that do watch porn. On the other hand, asexulaity is the lack of sexual attraction so just because your marriage became sexless does not mean your husband is asexual. There are many reasons why a marriage becomes sexless. What I suggest you do is talk openly about it, ask him if or was ever he is sexually attracted to you or anyone for that matter. If he is asexual, I assume that he is of the romantic variety and loves you in the way that any romantic partner would love their partner, so keep that in mind.



We have talked about it, and he know i dont like it. He do want's us to be together, but dont what any sexuall contact with me or any body else (according to him)..........


Well, there are many romantic relationships involving a sexual and an asexual. In these relationships, the sex becomes an issue and there three ways to solve it: the two of can agree to make the relationship sexual, keep the relationship sexless or, find a third person(s) to have sex-only relationship with the sexual. You have to find what works for your relationship and go with that.

As for the porn issue, I don't not know what to say about that but I can understand your frustration with him watching porn.

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#6 thylacine

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 03:46 PM

To answer the question, I don't watch porn, myself.
Most asexual people I know seem to be that way their whole lives, and don't just suddenly become that way. I think maybe something else is going on... Hope that helps.
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#7 Old_Tired_Heavily_Armed

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 03:49 PM

There are some asexuals that do watch porn. On the other hand, asexulaity is the lack of sexual attraction so just because your marriage became sexless does not mean your husband is asexual. There are many reasons why a marriage becomes sexless. What I suggest you do is talk openly about it, ask him if or was ever he is sexually attracted to you or anyone for that matter. If he is asexual, I assume that he is of the romantic variety and loves you in the way that any romantic partner would love their partner, so keep that in mind.



HOLY CRAP...never be so cavalier as to suggest discussions that might lead to the truth. Marriages want the truth? Marriages can't handle the truth. (with apologies to Jack Nicholson..."A Few Good Men."

At least wait until the children are grown before you go discussing the years of built up resentments that, when brought to the surface, result in a hostile and protracted divorce.
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#8 Blunderbuss

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 04:03 PM

I don't.

... Finished.

#9 Jack Havock

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 04:50 PM

I'm like that.

#10 Old_Tired_Heavily_Armed

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 07:10 PM

Read all of B F Skinners works...that should fix you right up. and drink a lot of vodka and watch a lot of Fox News.
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#11 Lady Ghoul

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 07:10 PM

HOLY CRAP...never be so cavalier as to suggest discussions that might lead to the truth. Marriages want the truth? Marriages can't handle the truth.

Sometimes they can.

Not all asexuals define asexuality in terms of sexual attraction. Some just do not desire sexual interaction.

"...research on self-identified asexuals...shows that they do not necessarily have a lower desire for sexual activity, 

but they clearly have a lower desire for sexual activity with others..." Anthony Bogaert

 

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#12 Midnight Lady

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 07:37 PM

Even when I was in my last relationship, I preferred porn to the guy, because it was much more easy and no complications/drawbacks at all: a few minutes - and done!

So, it is very individual for everyone. For some people, porn is not a big deal, for some people, it is a no-no in relations.

#13 G4RRYs

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Posted 17 March 2012 - 06:08 PM

Some do. I have porn, but it rarely gets used. I keep thinking about getting rid of it actually.

#14 *Moon*

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Posted 17 March 2012 - 06:27 PM

Some do. Some don't. It is a preference from person to person.

It is always best to speak with him directly to ask.

#15 12padams

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Posted 17 March 2012 - 09:12 PM

I am just about to turn 18 and have been asexual my whole life. Trust me when I say I have never had a single desire to watch porn and have never tried to do it on purpose. When I used to explain to my school friends that i was asexual they quickly whipped out their phones and said what do you think of this (porn). I always was repulsed and instantly ran away. I just can't take it and practically have a phobia of sexual organs. My mum even told me that she had been emailed porn and wanted me to see it. I said no then returned to my room to do my homework. All of a sudden I hear the door rattle behind me and realized that my mum had been watching me for 10 minutes to see what my reaction would be when I saw it... I never did and she became very confused.

It's driving me nuts! What's the big deal with looking at a few buldges???

#16 Vdougie

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Posted 17 March 2012 - 09:31 PM

I'm asexual, and I look at porn from time to time. I have no desire to have sex with anybody. Since, I have a libido, I look at to help me get off when my libido increases.

#17 PerfectlyDarkTails

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Posted 17 March 2012 - 09:58 PM

I've used porn out of curiosity, mostly LGBT stuff but discovered that it really don't do anything for me, and that's why I don't use it anymore.

#18 Solthar

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Posted 18 March 2012 - 08:56 AM

Meh, some of it can be funny as hell at first, but it quickly becomes boring. I can quite happily live without it, but if I come across it I don't freak out.

I guess my general reaction to porn is a general indifference tinged with mild curiosity.

#19 Vivi

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Posted 20 March 2012 - 01:47 AM

i watch it because i like the feeling of being aroused but i never want to act on it and i watch it maybbeee four times a months sometimes not at all. Im not sure if that might help with your question.

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#20 CornOnDaCobb

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Posted 20 March 2012 - 06:20 AM

www.reddit.com/r/earthporn
(SFW)

With some sensual music, it fulfills all my needs.
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#21 zerogirl

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Posted 25 March 2012 - 12:30 AM

I watch yaoi hentai. I did watch a brittish porn once and while it did nothing for me, the begining was funny. Basically the funny part was the british detective finds a girl whom needs a detective to bring her g-spot to justice in the intro. After that the dvd is really boring and gross.
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#22 PerfectlyDarkTails

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Posted 25 March 2012 - 02:10 AM

I watch yaoi hentai. I did watch a brittish porn once and while it did nothing for me, the begining was funny. Basically the funny part was the british detective finds a girl whom needs a detective to bring her g-spot to justice in the intro. After that the dvd is really boring and gross.

When you said "British Porn", all I thought of is Family Guy...
Spoiler


#23 ignoranceisn'tbliss

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Posted 25 March 2012 - 05:57 AM


I watch yaoi hentai. I did watch a brittish porn once and while it did nothing for me, the begining was funny. Basically the funny part was the british detective finds a girl whom needs a detective to bring her g-spot to justice in the intro. After that the dvd is really boring and gross.

When you said "British Porn", all I thought of is Family Guy...
Spoiler

Lolz
I tried to get into porn.....didn't really like it :blink: I've never really liked seeing genitals...and after a while porn gets really repetitive. I did find that I do like to watch people playing with their boobs :lol:

I do, however, consistently search for new content in my fetish. I generally avoid any visible genitalia, but if I find something with enough of what I'm looking for I can ignore genitals. So you could say my fetish is the equivalent of another person's porn, except people would probably find mine much stranger.
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#24 Guest_member25959_*

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Posted 25 March 2012 - 06:40 PM

Some do, some don't. Personally, I don't.

#25 Em_BR_Ace

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Posted 25 March 2012 - 08:36 PM

I always watched porn but never wanted to have actual sex. I always were that way, though. I have sex drive, but no attraction.

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#26 mockingjay29

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Posted 28 March 2012 - 03:03 AM

Porn can be addicting. I used to watch it a few years ago, but then I just stopped doing it. I was fine afterwards and don't have any intention to go back.

I think your husband is heterosexual. I don't know, he just doesn't sound too much of an asexual to me.
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#27 Spastic_Morteo

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Posted 29 March 2012 - 05:39 AM

I found porn when I was really young and still watch to this day. I just don't feel attracted to anyone I meet.

#28 B.W. Battle

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Posted 29 March 2012 - 05:47 AM

Some do, other dont, and their are those down right disgusted with sex scenes in movies, everyones different as is their comfort levels. I use to be partial to Hentai/Ecchi back when my sex drive was over the roof as a young teen but now I've settled down a bit. Most people(at least my male friends) I know tend to go the same way no matter their oreintation or fetish. Maybey most of us get Desensitized to it after awhile. Personally, I still struggle whith porn sometimes It's not that I want to have sex it is just this crazy libido of mine dosen't want to settle down and certain material helps me get through it. It more of an annoyance then anything else. Is anybody else going through something like this too?
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#29 Rosanquette

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Posted 29 March 2012 - 05:47 AM

The few times I watched porn was out of mere curiosity, never desire. It did nothing but disgust me. But not all asexuals feel that way.

#30 Starr

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Posted 31 March 2012 - 01:39 AM

I like to watch jgv porn from time to time and have found myself attracted to some of the actors but I never wanted to have sex even up to this day.




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