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newgirl

40's

Recommended Posts

blondie12
You can control your own destiny...

Oh, what a wonderful universe you live in - how do I join it? :)

In my universe, my lifestyle choices affect the risk of various good and nasty things happening to me, but this in no way resembles 'controlling my destiny'. This sucks. :(

I'm sorry to hear that. I just try to live each day the best way I know how. Sometimes it's great, sometimes it's not. I just try not to let it control the person that I am. I hope it gets better for you.

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newgirl

Blonde12, Friend Without Benefits and Apop, I hope you 3 can come to the Los Angeles meetup on Aug 25th Sat 6pm.

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Grayd Ace

I'm 39 and look 22 and I DREAD turning 40. Most of my friends are in their 20's and we all get along great. And when my age comes up, I hate it. I hate the term 'middle age' because it's always said so nastily by some people and I associate it with aging and not being cool anymore. :(

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Beachwalker

I'm 39 and look 22 and I DREAD turning 40. Most of my friends are in their 20's and we all get along great. And when my age comes up, I hate it. I hate the term 'middle age' because it's always said so nastily by some people and I associate it with aging and not being cool anymore. :(

Hello It's good to see someone else use the 'cool' word, I thought I was the only one left on the planet who still says 'cool'. :)

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Beachwalker

I'm now officially 40!

Hi! I just joined the boards (intro here: http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?/topic/76788-older-but-just-figuring-things-out/).

I'm 39, but am just a month and a half away from the big 4-0, so may as well jump into this age group!

Hope you had a good birthday did you do anything special?

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Lady Grey

Hope you had a good birthday did you do anything special?

Thanks! I haven't done anything big yet. I spent the evening before with my family (mother and brothers). I'm having a party this coming weekend--it's quite a bit later as it's a joint party with a friend who is also turning 40 tomorrow.

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dormouse

In the early 40's, I felt no different than the 30's. By 45, vision started going. By 48, I've had 3 surgeries to fix joint problems that I allowed to exist in my 20's & 30's. I still haven't found my perfect career nor married nor had kids. I am independent though and love living alone with my pets. :) I must say, now that I'm in my late 40's, I'm a bit nervous about the 50's. :P

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newgirl

I love being in my early 40's but I hate not finding my calling and passion in life.

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Eggs

I'm gradualy coming to terms with being in my 40s. It's definitely been a time of many adjustments and realising my own mortality. Had the obligatory crisis and now I'm well, ok. Better now than i was at the start.

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Lady Girl

Hello members, guests, and anonymous users. Mr. LG here. I haven't been posting much lately, so...back into the swing of things. :)

Glad you are back. 8)

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Eggs

Hello members, guests, and anonymous users. Mr. LG here. I haven't been posting much lately, so...back into the swing of things. :)

Nice to meet you Mr LG. I'm Eggs and I'm kind of new here :)

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Twosixteen

I've felt alienated pretty much all of my life too - maybe longer.

I actually quite like it. Alienated people can observe without feeling the need to participate.

And this just popped into my head - a quiz for 40-somethings. Identify this quotation:

'My music's all about urban alienation ... apparently'

"You just called me a b@$t@rd, didn't you?" ;)

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Blue Cat

I am in my early 40's, but I never think much about the age thing. I've had a lot of major health problems (10 surgeries in 3 years), and am no longer able to work, so I feel a lot older, but its because of my health, not the magic number attributed to my age. I am fortunate to look younger than my age, and since most of my friends are 10+ years older than I, I am frequently referred to as a kid. It doesn't help that I live with my mother -- I think that makes me seem younger to others as well.

I think the only "enlightenment" I have achieved in my forties is finding AVEN. I struggled for years with my sexual identity, and I am so relieved to have finally found it. No more feeling like the odd man out -- there are others like me!

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Janieg

The guilt and feeling of inadequacies are terrible. I've been trying to like sex for 30 years. I'm widowed and just remarried again for about a year and here I go again. Thought it would be different this time. Wish I heard of asexuality before I ruined another mans life. What do I do? I'm afraid to tell him and my children love him. I feel guilty being here!!

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Beachwalker

The guilt and feeling of inadequacies are terrible. I've been trying to like sex for 30 years. I'm widowed and just remarried again for about a year and here I go again. Thought it would be different this time. Wish I heard of asexuality before I ruined another mans life. What do I do? I'm afraid to tell him and my children love him. I feel guilty being here!!

Hi Janieg and welcome to Aven :cake:

A sexual mismatch doesn't necessarily mean you still can't have a successful happy relationship, there are many stories of just such relationships here. Have a look around and make yourself at home, and I hope things work out well for you and your family.

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Peaceful & Happy

I'm now officially 40!

Hi! I just joined the boards (intro here: http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?/topic/76788-older-but-just-figuring-things-out/).

I'm 39, but am just a month and a half away from the big 4-0, so may as well jump into this age group!

Happy B'day. :cake: . I just turned 49. I cannot wait until I hit 50. Then I will feel like I have accomplished something. :D

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Shockwave

I turned 40 this year and, coincidentally, just happened to get my first pair of reading glasses a few months later.

I still get hit on by girls in their early 20s when I'm by the pool though. I'm not sure if that makes me feel older or younger.

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Mole

Hi All,

I didn't notice that I had reached forty until I was forty four (slow on the uptake as usual). Since then I haven't noticed much slowing down but then I never was a first to the front young tiger type, I have always been more of a bagpuss type (for the record I am a dog person but don't mind fussing my neighbours cats when they are in my garden).

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auntie_em

Hi, I'm new here and happy to find the group.

I am 41 and content with it. The best thing is I have reached a point in my life where I don't have to pretend to like things I don't. I still struggle with sexuality issues, which I am still pretty much in the closet about. I just don't date but I would like to change that. A companion would be nice, now that I know there are other people like me.

But in other areas, I get to just be me! It's great. I never liked loud clubs and now, I don't have to go to them.

I get to like the books I like to read, the music I love to listen to (celtic and renaissance)...even the kind of food I like (not spicey.)

I have been assured I am still cool (in a cool-nerd kind of way) and I get along with people of all ages. If I had known how much I would enjoy my 40's, I would've done it sooner.

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blondie12

I'm now I'm my late 40s staring down the barrel of 50. I've been married more than once and now I'm on my own. I just wonder if anyone in their 40s would be satisfied finding companionship without all the stressful relationship thing. I would enjoy the company of someone in a roommate situation, that can have the illusion of being a couple without having to be a couple. Well even if it doesn't come true by the time I'm 50, I can dream can't I? Now that Im free, I can be who I was truly meant to be. Thanks to Aven and all the other asexual sites! You are all the greatest people, thanks!

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Tengu

I'm 43 (wait, let me check... crap, I ran out of fingers and toes, I think I'm 43...) and I just found this place. Glad to see I'm not the only person here in this fine age range.

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Mole

(wait, let me check... crap, I ran out of fingers and toes, I think I'm 43...)

Hi Tengu,

I find teeth useful when fingers and toes aren't enough, for really big numbers I have a spare set :-)

I never expected to think like that when I was younger.

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Ghizwiz

I just wonder if anyone in their 40s would be satisfied finding companionship without all the stressful relationship thing. I would enjoy the company of someone in a roommate situation, that can have the illusion of being a couple without having to be a couple.

That is exactly the kind of relationship I dream about too. Well, since there are at least two of us thinking this way, there has to be others! I will remain positive.

Btw I'm 46. Turning 40 was stressful only because I was in financial crisis & unsure of being able to hold on to my house. The good news is I have a great job again & it looks like I will be able to pay off my house shortly after turning 50 - so I may be one of the few people who actually looks forward to turning 50! :)

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frakas

41 years old here. I've never felt more confident and capable in my life. It's a great age to reach.

I finally have the wisdom to harness my reckless enthusiasm.

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WarmedByTheSun

Life is more liberating the older you are. You get to an age when you don't care what you think, say or do.

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Crazy Cat Lady

I'm 39 and look 22 and I DREAD turning 40. Most of my friends are in their 20's and we all get along great. And when my age comes up, I hate it. I hate the term 'middle age' because it's always said so nastily by some people and I associate it with aging and not being cool anymore. sad.gif

Hello It's good to see someone else use the 'cool' word, I thought I was the only one left on the planet who still says 'cool'. smile.gif

I say "cool", too. :-)

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Crazy Cat Lady

So, hi! I will be 40 in just under 2 weeks, so I thought I'd pop over here and check out the thread. Not too worried about the number. I might "freak out" for about a minute or so, but then that should be the end of it!

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catasa

I'll be in my 40's in 6 months. Do that count?

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Ragdollphysics

Hi all, I'm 40 something, enjoying my age and the confidence it brings, happy as can be discovering I'm asexual :)

I found it hard but I came out last week, making a total of a half-dozen ppl who now know.

I may have done it for selfish reasons but everyone was very supportive indeed.

:)

/cheery wave

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